Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Sociopath as entrepreneur

One of my mentors just asked me, "What made you who you are." It was meant to be complimentary. The implication was that I am better than a lot of my peers. Particularly my mentor is impressed with how I seem to understand many more aspects of the dilemmas we are working with than some of my colleagues.

I guess you could call it an ability to think abstractly, or an increased awareness of the mechanics--a more intimate knowledge of the behind the scenes action that is motivating so much of what we look at. It allows me to Bayesian update like mad, like an excel spreadsheet with hundreds of inter-working, interdependent formula, but capable of adjusting in an instant based on new information.

My mentor actually calls it "alien." Again, he means it to be complimentary. He subscribes to the theory that great thinkers and entrepreneurs tend to be "aliens," people who are not really part of their culture. Aliens live parallel lives with different mindsets than the majority. They're readily able to think critically about the world around them because it already seems foreign to them. There's no effort in trying to maintain distance or perspective regarding the problem. The distance has always been there. The distance will always be there because that is the way the alien interacts with everything in the world.

My mentor thinks I must be an alien because my smart ideas are not just smart, they're groundbreaking. Even the way I explain my ideas to others is alien. It's like I am trying to translate my ideas into a language that others will be able to understand. The effort I am making to communicate is apparent, like figuring out how to instruct someone to hike from point A to point B when I had just teleported there instantly. My mentor thinks that you simply cannot teach people to think this way. You can open their mind and teach them some tricks, but they will never think fluently this way the same way that an "alien" would. I laughed off his comments, saying that I have plenty of stupid ideas too. "Well I do too," he responded, "we all do. That's part and parcel of risky thinking."

Here's an example of "alien" entrepreneurship, Tony Hseih, head of Zappos. From the NY Times:
At times, Mr. Hsieh comes across as an alien who has studied human beings in order to live among them. That can intimidate those who are not accustomed to his watchful style. “I have been in job interviews with him where you are expecting more, and it can be awkward silences,” said Ned Farra, who manages relationships with other Web sites for Zappos. “He is not afraid of it. It is almost like he is testing you.”

Mr. Hsieh said that he surrounds himself with people who are more outgoing than he is, in part to draw himself out. “My view is that I am more of a mirror of who I am around,” he said. “So if I am around an introverted person that is really awkward. But if I am around an extroverted person I will be whoever they are times point-5.”
***
Outwitting the system is something Mr. Hsieh has honed from a young age. In addition to describing his youthful business ventures (worm farms failed, personalized photo buttons succeeded), “Delivering Happiness” recounts a history of scam artistry. To fool his Taiwanese-born parents into thinking he was practicing piano and violin, he recorded practice sessions and played them back on weekend mornings.
***
Jason Levesque, another Harvard friend who worked at LinkExchange, recalled Mr. Hsieh’s self-effacement. When inviting friends to play a video game, “he was obviously the best at the game, but he would sort of hide that in order to get everyone to play,” Mr. Levesque said.

Like Mr. Zuckerberg’s, Mr. Hsieh’s success has been built in part on his ability to anatomize the way people crave connections with others, and turn those insights into a business plan.
***
Mr. Hsieh, who professes fascination with dating guides like Neil Strauss’s “The Game” and pontificated on his theory of the evolutionary futility of sexual jealousy, said he does not date. “I don’t usually define dating or not dating, together or not together,” said Mr. Hsieh, nursing another tall shaker of wine at the Downtown Cocktail Room. “I prefer to use the term ‘hang out.’ And I hang out with a lot of people, guys and girls. I don’t really have this one person I am dating right now. I am hanging out with multiple people, and some people I hang out with more than others.”
***
“I think of everyone I know in my life, he’s the best at not feeling jealousy,” she added. “But I think he’s human, whether anyone believes that or not.”
This is not the first time I have been called an alien. It is not even the first time that I have been called that with a positive or value neutral connotation. I never know what to say in these situations. I agree with them, obviously, but in terms of explaining to them why I might have grown up with the mentality of an "alien" in a foreign world...? "It's a mystery," I tell them. But it's not. It hasn't been a mystery since I became self-aware, or maybe since I learned of the term "sociopath".

448 comments:

  1. anyone else starting to think ME is a narc?

    ReplyDelete
  2. A narcissistic sociopath? Unthinkable.

    For me, I think it comes with viewing people and life itself differently. When you're Machiavellian by default, you can't help but see situations that others don't, and plan for scenarios most people wouldn't even consider.

    It can give you some awful blindspots sometimes, though. Luckily, they aren't all incurable.

    I've had some odd compliments before. The weirdest was specter. He said it seemed like I was there, but not, disjointed from time and always observing, and able to shift as if I wasn't something tangible.

    Granted, he was pretty stoned :p

    ReplyDelete
  3. yea but ME doesn't seem like a sociopath at all.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You know what, I think you're right.

    I'm pretty sure he's an Aspie Bipolar Schizoid Manic Depressive Beeper.

    ReplyDelete
  5. who will be richards friend tonight who will change his image, mold him like a clay, crush him with a magnifying glass

    richards got an attention deformity because he was neglected, bullied- this makes it easy to mold him like a clay ukan was right

    look! i changed my name! to richard! but ya can call me dick or dickie because i consider yall my friends

    tommy was a sick individual a disgusting sicko but now im a changed man by a snap of the finger i now have a purpose i do business and business is good

    richard kuklinski was a great man a true hero like a james bond he wuld take a bullet for his wife he killed over 250 men but no women no kids because those are the rules the code of omerta- according to luc besson

    go see the movie! it is all there! all truth no lies no exaggerations- based on a true story starring mickey rourke the gentle giant like richard kuklinski he had soft heart under hard shell he wuld take the bullet for his wife a true inspiration for us all

    ReplyDelete
  6. This one's for the ladies, particularly Haven.

    ReplyDelete
  7. If M.E were a narc he'd be all like I'M BETTER THAN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. I Didn't get that vibe. Narcissists are also extremely closed minded.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am utterly fascinated by the article, today. I have something to add, if I may be so bold. I think the alien factor extends to emotions. I think having a sociopath friend is ground breaking, emotionally, in the same way M.E's mentor said he was ground breaking, intellectually.

    This is my personal experience. It was my great priviledge that a sociopath friend came in to my life. It was the first time I could show anyone who I was and tell anyone my childhood story, with all the details,nothing made prettier, nothing cleaned up.



    The sociopath will accept them and in as a ground breaking way, as ME's thought processes which went outside of the box, to the point that they were called "alien" It has been life changing for me. I have gratitude that is beyond anything I could express to this person, who just lets me be me.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Haha, gee thanks Medusa. It probably smells like gummy bears, baby prostitutes, with a hint of pepper spray and ether.


    But let's face it... men want what they want. I flat out tell people I'm crazy, but it doesn't stop them from chasing me heh.

    ReplyDelete
  10. In fact... telling people about my issues has pulled people in harder. It's weird. Probably has something to do with rampant white knight syndrome.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Be yourself! Even if your an asshole.

    ReplyDelete
  12. The tone of this post is standing out. The name-throwing in there, the Bayesian updates, the spreadsheets, as if these are big deals for anyone who have studied anything slightly quantitative.

    One piece of learning is the awkwardness of being around introverts as Hsieh calls it. I'd add being around the stupid, the insecure into that pot. I like how he wants the extraverts around him and only play to 50% of their game. This is a sure guarantee to stop appearing as a narc or a self-centered bozo for a smart mind.

    As for anyone who claims what I said does not make any sense to them after reading this (Medusa, this slightly is addressed to you, do you get it this time?), sorry, but trust me M.E. and Hsieh know what I am talking about it. You just are not alien enough, that's all.

    Now, the Red Flag fragrance, the link from Medusa above. Do you see how threatening a female like that is to men? And women find it equally amusing to laugh at that woman? Why? Because she is strong?

    Medusa, I've been noticing you have a very strong reaction to any hint of power coming from women. I certainly aggravate you. Ask yourself if that's because you don't give yourself the permission to be the same way yet? Or, that you think women should not be that powerful? What's the issue there?

    ReplyDelete
  13. @haven

    men do not care about a woman's personality. men are superficial and only care for looks. women go for personality.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Medusa needs to have her ass kicked.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I was hoping you wouldn't take it as an insult, as it wasn't meant that way.

    I just figured you'd have something interesting to say.

    ReplyDelete
  16. My last comment was addressed to Haven.

    Sceli... see how I said, "for the ladies"? I include myself in that group. I posted the video because Haven has a sense of humor, and I thought she might have something interesting to say in response.

    ReplyDelete
  17. The video is an excellent supplement to a book, On Your Own Terms: A Woman's Guide to Working with Men. One of the points is how at work place the joke is typically on women and how both women and men laugh harder when the joke is on the women, especially powerful women. They change the gender in a joke from woman to man and people don't laugh. Rewatch that video assuming genders are completely reversed and you'll see that you will lose your sense of humor all of a sudden. Then the question is what changed?

    This is not an attack on you, I just have a point to make, that's all. I also laughed while watching the video but could not pass on relating it to a book I thought was very informative for women.

    ReplyDelete
  18. In addition... The book I mentioned seems to be written about sociopaths, if you are ok to read today's post by ME as one of key things about sociopaths, and also accept that men in general behave more like sociopaths than how women in general behave.

    As you may have noticed I want women stronger, I react when they accept their weaknesses as if these are to be celebrated.

    ReplyDelete
  19. :) It's ok to be silly and playful and a lot of fun. And remain strong, nevertheless.

    Don't make me feel guilty that I am cutting into your fun in here.

    ReplyDelete
  20. As you may have noticed I want women stronger, I react when they accept their weaknesses as if these are to be celebrated.

    Sceli, how do you react?

    Being in tune with weaknesses, getting to know them, being willing to sit in them, delighting in their effect, is necessary in order to flip them around into strengths.

    Ask a person who is into S&M how easy it is to flip over from dominatrix to submissive. It's a fine line a lot of people delight in stepping over.

    ReplyDelete
  21. You don't have to give up a thing if you're aware your acting weak. If you ARE weak, that's another story.

    ReplyDelete
  22. One must, truly, accept one's own weakness before one can embrace one's own strength, I think. I guess, one must accept one's own darkness before one can radiate one's own light, as well.

    ReplyDelete
  23. @Medusa... I'm not insulted at all. Don't worry. On the contrary I found it pretty amusing.


    Men are funny creatures. You can wear your crazy on your sleeve and not drive them away if you hook 'em right.

    ReplyDelete
  24. lmfao, medusa at video!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Getting intimate with the Puppets LMFAO

    ReplyDelete
  26. *coughed up hairball*

    ReplyDelete
  27. It's all about the presentation. The chick in the video came out great but then lost it towards the end. Information that can viewed as sketchy you have to avoid altogether in initial introductions to a new crowd of people. Then you need to spin the attitude of what you're saying so it inspires sympathy from the person you're trying to charm. It's an art.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Muppet its just a game

    ReplyDelete
  29. my weakness is cock

    ReplyDelete
  30. @ Monica i radiate cock and booze

    ReplyDelete
  31. I have done this so many times. I mean they're bound to find out you're on meds, you think. Just get your crazy out of the way and spill it, I used to say. But no one REALLY wants a crazy. You have to say you have depression and you have to make them think you are a trooper. And you are. But you're way more crazy than you let on. So you introduce your crazy slowly little by little. Before you know it, they don't care, you're wonderful the way you are. You have to start new every fucking time. It's exhausting.

    ReplyDelete
  32. to sit and share you have to care i dont care about those who want to eat me

    ReplyDelete
  33. I saw the name Jason Levesque and I could only think of this one. Probably not the same guy.

    I like the alien analogy. That's what it feels like whenever I'm interviewing for a new job. They tell me what they want and I start solving the problem mid-interview. It gives them the idea (possibly unfounded) that I'm so far removed from them that I'm capable of anything. Maybe they're right. I've never really thought of it that way.

    WV: derpowne

    ReplyDelete
  34. I give agita so it don't matter.

    ReplyDelete
  35. You've got that right Bella. It really is exhausting. Some things I don't bother hiding, others, well, it's not like I walk around with Beeper stamped on my forehead. Besides, if you spill everything about yourself too fast you lose the mystery and bait that keeps 'em coming back to find out more.

    One of my favorite lines when guys complain about women being crazy and finding a 'sane' one... "Darling, it's not that all women are crazy. All people are crazy. It's a matter of finding crazy that you're compatible with". Say it with a wink and a hint of a smile and it's not hard to convince them that your crazy is infact, exactly the kind of crazy they want.

    ReplyDelete
  36. i am not THAT crazy geez

    ReplyDelete
  37. it is my lil secret i suppose

    ReplyDelete
  38. Ha, yeah I have used a similar line.

    But you have to wink in a non sexual way so they only imagine you might be freak in bed. They're up for sticking it out with you so they can find out.

    Men are too predictable when it comes to sex. It's a tough call, cause you think like they do, too!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Fake Bella you is retarded

    ReplyDelete
  40. Are you working your way through school, Post?

    ReplyDelete
  41. I've been contacted by a relative concerning the suicide of Erin (Ami).

    ReplyDelete
  42. i am on meds anti pysch and mood stablizers --------keeps me level

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anon, yes. In addition to my less above-board activities, I also hold a steady job for my out of class hours. Idle hands, as they say...~

    ReplyDelete
  44. Me, mood stabilizer and antidepressant. Got rid of anti psych.

    ReplyDelete
  45. i can be exhausting to get real with my friendships dont last long for this reason if i tell them the truf they run off- i come with an emotional reset button

    ReplyDelete
  46. I am hungry. Laters

    ReplyDelete
  47. i see dead people :o

    ReplyDelete
  48. they want to rape me

    ReplyDelete
  49. Post Modern is kinda hot ;)

    ReplyDelete
  50. makes me feel like a school boy again

    ReplyDelete
  51. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3_Q96eJr1k&feature=related

    ReplyDelete
  52. Hi Haven! How are things with you and the tech boy?

    That was a great video Medusa.

    ReplyDelete
  53. i dont swim with sharks

    ReplyDelete
  54. want to have a pow wow, guppie darling, u can stay fur dinner

    ReplyDelete
  55. i wouldnt eat, you special guppie

    ReplyDelete
  56. look at my other guppie friends i am harmless

    ReplyDelete
  57. ur right guppie, you are not, special i eat guppies but, i wouldn't bother to eat you, your worthless to me

    ReplyDelete
  58. guppie, you are not invited, anymore. no one with eva love you. no other guppies will. swim in to my mouth, and i will, take the pain away

    ReplyDelete
  59. lol. I can't watch that video Medusa. I think it's only in the US. Oh well. Goddamn the UK!

    ReplyDelete
  60. as the ocean turns- stay tuned

    ReplyDelete
  61. Is there anything socio's have to work hard at?

    ReplyDelete
  62. Hello Beautiful Cheeks Hi Gary
    Harv, I don't know about your loyalties, man.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Hi there Sweets! I'm doing well all things considered.

    Things are going great with Tech Boy. I'm completely ignoring my instincts haha. The other night he asked about my scars and stuff which was a semi awkward 2 minute conversation but he handled it well. He didn't seem too weirded out and spent half the night wrapped around me telling me how beautiful I am, so all in all things are good. Except for my paranoia. And second guessing myself. And wanting to run away. ::laughs::

    How've you been doll?

    ReplyDelete
  64. Hi Frank
    I know what you mean about Harv. Do you think he has issues? I do, Frank.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Fuck you, Frank. I am not that pussy you make me out to be. Just because you are a stupid moron, Frank, don't drag Harv down with you.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Haven

    Yeah it is a fine line to walk, thats for sure. Who doesn't like a good snuggler :)

    I have been good for the most part. I seemed to have crawled up inside myself lately and 'nested' in my brain.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Relax Harv, Gary is not like Frank. Don't paint Gary with the same broad brush, OK?

    ReplyDelete
  68. The other night he asked about my scars and stuff which was a semi awkward 2 minute conversation

    ReplyDelete
  69. Frank, what keeps you here? I am undecided about staying or going.

    ReplyDelete
  70. i cant, connect here, either

    ReplyDelete
  71. k im drunk. Sup peeps? I recently started going out with a nice guy, for once (k twice in my life). I kinda like him! :) Who knows...

    What advice can u give me. Should I take it slow? Bear in mind, I'm not used to slow.

    wv: hypar

    ReplyDelete
  72. @Guppie Frank likes to socialize. Some people don't like Frank, but that can happen anywhere, hun.

    ReplyDelete
  73. @Red Flag... ::laughs:: Nice.

    @Sweets... Ugh, I hate the brain nesting. That never goes well for me. I try to get out of my head as much as possible.

    ReplyDelete
  74. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqObPtltpvA

    something about this song, the voice, at the end of that movie. Caught my attention when i heard it.

    ReplyDelete
  75. @notme ... if it's a guy you think you want to have stick around for a while, take it slow. Of course I may just be suggesting this because it's what my therapist has been trying to get me to do (it's sort of working)... it really does feel odd. But it is slightly less crazy making then usual.

    ReplyDelete
  76. haven the irony is that this guy seems normal, stable, good professional prospects etc. and yet, HE wants to take things fast. I find his naturalness (eagerness) endearing. I'm used to people without boundaries. And that's partly why i like him. But this guy also happens to be pretty 'normal' as in, he wants to treat me right. I'm not used to that. I'm used to being the one who initiates things once i know the guy is interested. It's all weird for me. But i kinda like it. And i think you're right. Since he wants to move fast, I have to slow things down. LOL. Otherwise, fuck knows what disaster is round the corner. :)

    ReplyDelete
  77. funny, it's been my experience that all guys want things to move fast, or at least don't mind when they do, haha. I think that's just one more mark in the healthy normal male column. Def slow it down. It's fun to be in control of things. Delayed gratification keeps the appetite wet.

    ReplyDelete
  78. lol, first night he took me out, it was pouring with rain, i told him i wasn't in the mood for going to a club so we got a taxi. We snuggled the whole way then at the end, he swindled the cab driver out of some money, got into a proper confrontation. Lol, what a little rascal i thought, just what i like. LOL. I'm such a ditz, but fuck it, i like what i like.

    ReplyDelete
  79. becareful notme what we like can be our greatest enemy

    ReplyDelete
  80. a siren calling to our own demise

    ReplyDelete
  81. he will feast on your wrecked barge

    ReplyDelete
  82. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JcwkFuhKUc&feature=related

    i used to have to listen to this in music therapy in a facility to inspire feelings

    ReplyDelete
  83. OH my notme haha, a confrontation on the first date? idk, sounds like you're in for a wild ride.

    ReplyDelete
  84. He wiped out my entire bank account and maxed all my cards out. He molested my niece and slept with all my friends. I feel like hanging myself.

    -Notme on Lovefraud.com

    ReplyDelete
  85. haha, not a confrontation with me. With the cab driver! :)

    I made him hold out for sex for the first night even though we were in the same bed. He wants me to meet his family already. He's already told his dad about me. LOL! How weird is that shit? I@m not used to that. Gah!

    ReplyDelete
  86. He wiped out my entire bank account and maxed all my cards out. He molested my niece and slept with all my friends. I feel like hanging myself.

    -Notme on Lovefraud.com

    lol, you've mistaken me for an idiot. Fuck you. My neice? Really? I would hang him for that not myself u fucktard.

    ReplyDelete
  87. its okay notme, you will be floating soon. we all will tho one day

    ReplyDelete
  88. I am hesitant when someone rushes that much, Notme. I agree with Haven, slow it down...and be careful.

    ReplyDelete
  89. Oh I know you meant with the cabbie. Guys being that quick with the rage-tastic is usually something to watch out for. And already to meet his family?!? How long have you known him? Watch out for controlling behavior. Just keep your eyes open.

    ReplyDelete
  90. sweet cheeks would look pretty floating peacefully

    ReplyDelete
  91. is this the guy who wants to have a baby w u, notme?

    ReplyDelete
  92. when beepers are hot, men would not fuss out
    they'd just fuck and get out

    ReplyDelete
  93. c its pretty

    http://brotherpeacemaker.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/body-floating-in-water.jpg

    ReplyDelete
  94. well he wanted me to meet his fam and friends within a week of dating him. They are having a get together anyway and he said come.
    But yes, i'm careful. I'm always careful these days.

    Cheers girls. :)

    ReplyDelete
  95. That was not I, Harv. Fuck you, Frank.

    ReplyDelete
  96. "well he wanted me to meet his fam and friends within a week of dating him"

    he's showing you off.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Where are all the classy guys here

    ReplyDelete
  98. ME
    Daniel
    Post
    Frank
    That is it.

    ReplyDelete
  99. Not me, you held on him while you were in bed with him? You're a bitch. That is such a crazy thing to do to a guy... plus it's dangerous. If he weren't so nice he'd take what he wanted. But i guess it's good to know that you're in control

    ReplyDelete
  100. rape is good Missus

    ReplyDelete
  101. @Missus... No it's not a crazy thing to do with a guy. Women are allowed to say no to sex. Especially if they've just met a guy. Making out, messing around, oral, sex... there's allowed to be a progression of what goes on before a girl lets a guy in, eh hem, completely. It's not crazy. It's perfectly acceptable. If a guy gets bent out of shape about a chick sleeping over without putting out, then he's a massive fucking jerk and doesn't deserve whatever it is he was hoping for.

    ReplyDelete
  102. Lol. If she got raped there, I'd say she deserved it. He sounds like a total sucker though. She's got him put together, so I doubt it was a fear in her mind. She's playing with him.

    ReplyDelete
  103. You're a cunt if you think anyone deserves to get raped. If you're dating someone, and I mean dating someone with the intent of getting to know them, you have every right to take it at your own speed. If she's playing with him, and no one is getting hurt, then good for her. Or she may, you know, just not want to give it up on the first date. So congrats to her for doing what she feels best for her.

    ReplyDelete
  104. you will, float too, missus

    ReplyDelete
  105. A woman should be able to say No. What is this shit, MK?

    ReplyDelete
  106. haven dropped the c bomb

    ReplyDelete
  107. Wicked women. All of you... ;x

    ReplyDelete
  108. Missus Have you ever raped a man?

    ReplyDelete
  109. I HATE YOUR BREAD ANONNovember 22, 2011 at 4:54 PM

    bend over Missus

    ReplyDelete
  110. I'm jealous that you have a boyfriend Haven. He doesn't deserve you; even if he does.

    ReplyDelete
  111. If you invite a man in to come in and take him to your bed, but don't sleep with him you are playing games. If you get raped its your fault. You are trying to control him playing games

    ReplyDelete
  112. "If she got raped there, I'd say she deserved it"

    LOL i'll drink to that.

    ReplyDelete
  113. What a ignorant statement "I'd say she deserved it".

    I guess you put it all out on all your first dates.

    And she's going into psychology. Sheesh.

    ReplyDelete
  114. I want to talk about intimacy.

    ReplyDelete
  115. Ha ha. You are idealist thinking you could put yourself in situations and laws or morals will save you. It's like walking around some seedy park at night and thinking you won't get robbed. Keep playing games with guys you don't.know well and you are just rolling the dice.

    ReplyDelete
  116. Haven, there was a study done in 1998, which found that the majority of rape victims actually enjoy the experience. I don't know what the problem is.

    ReplyDelete
  117. Idealistic? Maybe.... It's definitely a risky situation. That's not a question. But deserving something incredibly damaging when you weren't asking or expecting it? No. No one deserves that. If you're actually interested in someone you're allowed to take things at your own pace. At a pace you feel comfortable. A woman has no obligation to a guys hormones.

    ReplyDelete
  118. @Anon 5:20... keep believing everything the internet tells you. It's funny for the rest of us.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Actually, I didn't find it on the internet. And who is "us"?

    ReplyDelete
  120. @Eden... Aws don't be jealous. I'll always have time for you ::wink:: As to whether he deserves me or not? Well? Who the hell knows. It's fun finding out though.


    @Anon... Us = anyone with any amount of intelligence.

    ReplyDelete
  121. He doesn't deserve you. It's already been established. :)

    ReplyDelete
  122. Lol. How would fabricating something make me any less intelligent than you?

    ReplyDelete
  123. haven is right, and missy has just gotten too used to being a slave to the desires of ukan. she's weak

    ReplyDelete
  124. Haven, she's fucking with him, not getting to know him. She's using him for attention. And she didn't try at all not to get into bed. She knew at the beginning of the night it'd lead no where. She just did it to toy with him.
    Don't get me wrong, I'm not for rape, fucking on a first date, or men determining pace. But she's a fuckin bitch if she's doing that to someone she cares about. She has no respect for him. I understand that you're pro control in the woman form, though, what with your stripper past and your general feminist advice in this situation, but that's bullocks. Its imbalanced in this case, and the relationship is currently doomed to failure.

    And frankly, if she's setting herself up to get raped like that, she's going to be the first one when it happens to say, "its all my fault"

    ReplyDelete
  125. Lol. Imagine even telling that story... "well, I climbed into bed with him and took off all of my clothes, but he thought I wanted to have sex! I told him no, but he just wouldn't listen! So he just took it, and i was powerless to stop him!"

    ReplyDelete
  126. Seriously, you're going to even argue this, haven?

    ReplyDelete
  127. You always take a breath to let your 'hubby' rush in and defend your stance Kanney. Why? And do you and Ukan have seperate opinions? Does he still control your emotions? Like when he almost had you at a suicidal state?

    I'm not surprised you feel that someone deserves to get raped. Last night you admitted to being a misogynist. That makes your word bullshit and predictable to me and also shows a complete fail at relating to other women. YOU are a fail. A cold, douche bag, failure like you should never become a therapist. Haven is right. Are you trying to imply men CAN'T control their hormones? That it was expected of her to be raped? That paints a very bad picture of men. She deserved to get raped because she was playing games? Toying with someones = Rape? And who are you to lecture on what you should and should not do on a date? I could say to you that you should steer clear of drug dealers, but hey, i'm sure you'll find a way to justify and twist that one too as is the norm with you.

    ReplyDelete
  128. Missus, she said she actually likes him.... which is why she's trying to decide to do things differently.

    We all know hormones like to say one thing while our brains say another. I've had plenty of times where my libido has wanted to jump someone the second I've met them, but my brain knows that if I did I'd never hear from them again. It's a balancing act in human interaction. Just because you know you're not going to fuck a guy at the beginning of the night doesn't mean you don't want to see where else the evening can lead. I've had plenty of experience going back to a guys place for the night, only to have him sleep on the couch because he didn't want to rush things but wanted to spend as more time with me that evening/morning. It all depends on how the evening plays out.

    Glad you're not for all that stuff though. But Even if you care about someone you're allowed to not fuck them if you don't feel like it. You may be right about her not respecting him, but she may also still be trying to figure out if she CAN respect him. If he accepts her choice to not go beyond her limits, that's a good way of figuring that out.

    I'm pro doing what you believe is right for yourself. I'll be the first to admit that I don't have a very healthy attitude towards the intentions of men, and I do believe they'll push beyond acceptable limits given the chance, but that doesn't change the fact that in getting to know someone, especially someone that you're attracted too, male or female, it is very likely you find yourself in an intimate situation that has progressed further than you expected it to go, or hell, even if it's going exactly where you thought it would, but in the moment decided that you needed things to slow down... and that's an OK choice.

    Regardless of whether or not a rape victim feels like 'it's their fault'... it doesn't actually make it their fault. It's not rape if you wanted it, and if you didn't want it, it's not ok.

    ReplyDelete
  129. Missus, you are a disgrace to womankind.
    Hi Frank

    ReplyDelete
  130. Yes. I will argue that. People get swept up in the heat of intimacy. I know I do. Attraction is powerful. But that doesn't mean that all fates are set in stone. Just because signs point to 'yes' doesn't mean that a woman doesn't have a right to say 'slow down'.

    wv: trampe

    ReplyDelete
  131. shit flingging monkeyNovember 22, 2011 at 6:20 PM

    MK has morphed into Ukan and thinks she's above everyone else. Notice she only dives into the females.

    And this all comes out of someone who fell for a shaman and drug dealer.

    And when did Notme say she was lying in bed naked?

    ReplyDelete
  132. haven you want a fuzzy pet? i need a home

    ReplyDelete
  133. Shit Flinging LoverNovember 22, 2011 at 6:26 PM

    Go Shit Flinging Monkey, Baby

    ReplyDelete
  134. I agree about Missus. Hi, Gary.

    ReplyDelete
  135. @shit flinging monkey

    "And when did Notme say she was lying in bed naked?"

    I was wondering the same thing. Seems Kanney's making retarded assumptions. Kanney is Ukan trying to get close to all the girls to figure them out. Ukan has admitted before he feels Medusa is strong and has TRIED to piece her together but failed. Now he's getting a ''Woman'' to try bond with the girls..Good thing is, most of them are not that stupid... I think...

    ReplyDelete
  136. @Ferral... I have a fuzzy pet, but thanks ;)

    ReplyDelete
  137. FYI, Kanney/Ukan, my assumptions are correct.

    ReplyDelete

  138. Regardless of whether or not a rape victim feels like 'it's their fault'... it doesn't actually make it their fault. It's not rape if you wanted it, and if you didn't want it, it's not ok.

    Nobody is talking about what's right and wrong, Haven, and nobody said rape was ok. We are talking about what you deserve and everybody in the world deserves what they have coming to them. If you walk in traffic you deserve to get run over. If you play with a loaded gun you deserve to get shot. If you invite a man you don't know well into your home and take him to your bed knowing you won't sleep with him (admit it you knew already) you deserve to get raped. You can tell her it's not her fault to help her get over it, but deep down you know she is a idiot. I guess you don't need to hammer in the lesson since she would have enough trauma to never do that dumb shite again.


    You always take a breath to let your 'hubby' rush in and defend your stance Kanney.


    I said a year ago to medusa that my wife was more anti-feminist than me. I'm actually rolling with her opinion on this one not the other way around, so get stuffed you fucking cunt.

    ReplyDelete
  139. a smart gal would fuck em *ride it*

    ReplyDelete
  140. you have a groupie luv *yum*

    ReplyDelete

  141. FYI, Kanney/Ukan, my assumptions are correct.

    I love how paranoid I have gotten some of you. I don't have to play games to play games with you anymore. This place is on autopilot manipulation.

    ReplyDelete
  142. shit flingging monkeyNovember 22, 2011 at 6:40 PM

    So running a high volume drug operation will get you both what you deserve. Prison.

    Stupid ass.

    ReplyDelete

  143. And this all comes out of someone who fell for a shaman and drug dealer

    At least she has a good life and is provided for. The lot of you are hanging out in a site that's dedicated to your ex boyfriend's personality disorder. How pathetic and lonely is that existance?

    ReplyDelete
  144. "I said a year ago to medusa that my wife was more anti-feminist than me."

    She's also fictional.

    ReplyDelete
  145. "At least she has a good life and is provided for."

    And driven to suicide because she's weak.

    ReplyDelete
  146. i m badder that any missus

    ReplyDelete
  147. Shit Flinging Monkey LoverNovember 22, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    Love you, Baby











    wv shitfling

    ReplyDelete
  148. "How pathetic and lonely is that existance?"

    I don't know. I never thought about selling drugs in a seedy park. One thing I know though, If you get stabbed there, you probably deserved it.

    ReplyDelete
  149. Ukan, Let's make this very clear:

    There is NO justification for rape.

    None.

    I'm not saying "it's not her fault" just to make her feel better. I'm saying it because it's true. Just because a guy can't control his cock doesn't make rape acceptable. Just because someone isn't given every gratification they want doesn't mean they deserve it. I agreed with you before and I still do that it is a dangerous situation to put yourself in, but that doesn't mean that you deserve to be violated.

    You and I do not have normal boundaries. We do not have normal concepts of boundaries. That does not mean that boundaries don't exist. Rape is not an acceptable boundary in any situation.

    ReplyDelete
  150. Anonymous Ukan's A Retard said...

    "How pathetic and lonely is that existance?"

    I don't know. I never thought about selling drugs in a seedy park. One thing I know though, If you get stabbed there, you probably deserved it.


    Lol

    ReplyDelete
  151. i luv how the word rape stirs this place up

    ReplyDelete
  152. UKan Low Functioning SociopathNovember 22, 2011 at 6:49 PM

    This is my theme song


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qlA2l8tWoU

    ReplyDelete
  153. LMFAO

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHX61Cs_k-M

    ReplyDelete
  154. "You always take a breath to let your 'hubby' rush in and defend your stance Kanney."

    Ukan uses his alter ego to rile things up for himself then suddenly pops up when there's shit successfully stirred. Unless he's using his alter ego to get info out of the girls and 'crack' them. Then he's nowhere to be seen.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Haven. I bet you can't logically explain how rape is "wrong"

    ReplyDelete
  156. i have walked through many seedy places never been raped----- what a fucking bummer

    ReplyDelete
  157. @Anon...

    Yes = yes.

    No = no.

    No does not = yes.

    Rape = hearing no, but acting on yes.

    = Wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  158. "The lot of you are hanging out in a site that's dedicated to your ex boyfriend's personality disorder."

    Whereas you have to make them up...

    ReplyDelete
  159. I AM REAL FUCKER *kisses*

    ReplyDelete
  160. I took artistic license on the naked thing. Plus if you believe she wasn't disrobed in some way you'd fall for her attention whoring too.
    I only attack women because I have little respect for their idiocy, and because none of the men have identities.
    UK an always comes out to defend me because i am UK an!
    Lol. But regarding that I'm not sure why he does, but its nice, and not because I can't defend my own opinions.
    Haven, you believe firmly in a man in his place. You like to be the dominant one too, so of course you're defending her. And frankly, if you can't control your libido, you shouldn't have someone in... and if you can control your libido when you have someone in, than you don't like them enough anyways.

    ReplyDelete
  161. Fuck! Talk about empathy overload! You can't even be pro rape in here.

    ReplyDelete
  162. Haven, just because there are no justifications for rape doesn't mean a, it doesn't happen, and b, it isn't dumb to set someone up to want to.
    It would be wrong if it happened to her... but it would be her fault, unsurprising, and naive of her to think otherwise.
    But why argue ifs.

    ReplyDelete
  163. ick shoot her and fuck me- we make her float

    ReplyDelete
  164. 'if you can control your libido when you have someone in, than you don't like them enough anyways.'

    TRANSLATON: if you're not offering yourself on a plate to every man you're interested in, there's something wrong with you

    that's just stupid.

    ReplyDelete
  165. I didn't say the rapist would be justified I said she deserves it.

    ReplyDelete
  166. when. Fell for a shaman, I was 19.
    When i fell for my husband, I was spoiled. Taken care of. Protected. Provided for. Loved, more than I can even understand. And enlightened.

    So while we're throwing stones in my direction, anyone have any more to fire?

    And the led me to suicide thing... lol. I'm actually alive... and well...
    Oh wait, that explains everything! I'm ukans figment to help him cope with the loss. Oh my gosh, how did I not see it!?

    ReplyDelete
  167. Missus, I think you are vile.

    ReplyDelete
  168. I like how anyone with an unpopular viewpoint is labeled as "low functioning"

    ReplyDelete

Comments on posts over 14 days are SPAM filtered and may not show up right away or at all.

Join Amazon Prime - Watch Over 40,000 Movies

.

Comments are unmoderated. Blog owner is not responsible for third party content. By leaving comments on the blog, commenters give license to the blog owner to reprint attributed comments in any form.