Friday, November 18, 2011

Mass manipulation (part 4)

I am manipulative and intentional about the way I write the blog. I never respond to comments or questions in the comments. Part of it is the Taylor Swift tactic of not trying to defend yourself but rather allowing others to make your arguments for you. Taylor Swift didn't have to confront Kanye West--people rushed to her defense to do it for her and it was infinitely more effective that way. Similarly, I never feel like I have to defend or justify myself or anything I say. People frequently defend my positions, or if they don't it doesn't matter. It costs too much to try to defend yourself (or even clarify something you've said), and there is no point I would want to make or image of myself that I would want to project that would be worth the potential fallout.

Another part of not replying in the comments (or anywhere publicly) is that I want to be able to speak to individuals how they want to be spoken to, without fear of alienating others in the process. I can be very friendly or very mean in email exchanges with people--from sycophantic to menacing. I don't want side effects of those conversations spilling over into other interactions because it will limit my future ability to convincingly be whatever I want in any particular situation.

Finally, I don't reply in the comments because I feel like it chills discussion. If I was active in my own comments section, fewer people would comment. They would be waiting for someone else (me) to say their thoughts for them. Some might be afraid to say something and have me contradict them or disagree. If I have something to say, I say it in a post. Otherwise I don't want anybody waiting around to hear my opinion on something. As it is, other sociopaths are ruthless with the people who (they think) put too much stock in things I say. It would be much worse if I interfered with the comments section as well. I don't want issues I discuss on the blog to always degrade into a war of personalities. Plus, I have found that silence is one of the best ways to elicit information. And I think part of the reason the blog is appealing is the diversity of very freely expressed opinion.

I selectively disclose information about myself for strategic reasons. For instance, I never talk about my gender or even strictly about my ethnicity or other demarcating personal characteristics. I hope by doing so that I will be a blank slate and people will be able to project their own ideas onto me. I want to be like Kim Jong-Il or Obama, a figurehead, a receptacle for people's hopes, dreams, fears. I want people to directly relate to the blog--to think of the sociopaths they love in their lives or the sociopaths they hate. If I got too specific about anything, the illusion would be broken. Instead I stick to generalities (like Kim Jong-Il and Obama) and let people fill in the blanks in whatever manner they feel inclined. When people write to me and say that I seem to describe perfectly their own experiences, either as a sociopath or as someone who has known a sociopath, I know I have been successful.

I am pretty good at choosing a particular featured photo for each post to set the mood. Sometimes they have an underlying meaning or reference to the blog post, sometimes they're random but I use them anyway to give the illusion of something deep but unstated.

I know people like to criticize or rally so sometimes I publish something for the sole purpose of galvanizing readers or provoking discussion/fights/ridicule. It keeps people blood thirsty and/or engaged.

As anyone noticed anything else?

284 comments:

  1. on topic of narcs

    ya could be a narc if-

    ya shoot heroin every day!

    anyone ever tried krokodil the russian drug?

    google it! gogle krokodil drug do a picture search!

    their flesh is rotting and dropping off like in the zombie movies very cool thats some nasty grug haha

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  2. That's not being manipulative that's being a pussy and to afraid to show part of yourself. Yur afraid of conflict and would rather be the wiZard of oz. You wanna be a blank slate cuz the real u ain't worth mentioning. Rationalize away.

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  3. whats manipulative about not writing if i dont write here every day does that make me a manipulative? oh no i dont want to be a manipulative but i dont want to read all this crap every day either if i dont feel like it that wuld be boring what to do?

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  4. "I know people like to criticize or rally so sometimes I publish something for the sole purpose of galvanizing readers or provoking discussion/fights/ridicule. It keeps people blood thirsty and/or engaged."

    I like how this comment has caused what it claims. And I'm sure M.E. planned it that way too. If you people were less idiotic, you wouldn't play into his hands so much. 'Though you must remember this is M.E.'s playgound and we are just the ants running around wondering when he will pick up his magnifying glass. The least we can do is piss on him before he does. Maybe then he would give us respect instead of pity.

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  5. did somebody mention piss ?

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  6. I pee'd the bed last night, as per usual. Misses Kanny took lots of pleasure in licking it up :D

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  7. oh no please dont burn us with your magnifying glass please dont piss on us haha!

    very silly comment how can he crush us with his magnifying glass what can he do? start deleting our comments? if ya think i will be crushed by this ya guess wrong

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  8. I thought my period was over the other night, got on top my luva and it wadn't done. Nnnnnope. bed looked like the horse's head-in-bed scene from Godfather. I went in to take a shower and left him in a pool of my warm blood.

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  9. I pee'd the bed last night, as per usual.

    lol

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  10. @ M.E.

    I noticed that you did not spend enough time to write more effectively today, quite wordy and repetitive. You must have been on a high of 'yourself' as you wrote this piece. I won't point out the obvious spelling mistakes (too much when more than one, which is the case today).

    It is best that you don't state your gender, particularly because men don't want to hear from a higher functioning sociopath who happens to be a woman. It is also best that you don't appear to take place in the comments section frequently.

    I agree that your selection of pictures for the posts have been great. Today's is particularly ironic because while the right up only reads as 'me, me, me,' the picture draws people in with the promise of 'me is about you.'

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  11. Good morning

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwc0AW67CmA

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  12. @M.E.
    Can you shut off that automatic video start coming from Nov 17 post?
    Do we have to wait for a week for it to become a nonissue?

    On a second thought, maybe there is a reason for that. Did you start making money by the commercials preceding the videos, and that's why the start is automatic?

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  13. It is best that you don't state your gender, particularly because men don't want to hear from a higher functioning sociopath who happens to be a woman.

    excuse me?

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  14. what can we do to get MEs respect instead of pity i want it so bad i worship ME ME is a god sexual symbol im in love with ME

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  15. Passing off normal things as acts of supreme invisible-hand manipulation is the new sociopath.

    21st century schizoid man.

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  16. Sceli you are bossy. Are you the boss of ME -hehe !

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  17. The reason to hide your gender when you are female, is the knowledge that everything you say will likely be filtered through a "female" screen. This doesn't happen so much with males. They only get a "mankind" screen.

    You know, the "you go girl!" section at the CD store.

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  19. What do you mean, Medusa?

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  21. But old white men are so wrinkly!

    \ /
    . .

    .

    #####

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  22. Some video source sites just auto start their videos like that, and a lot of video sites have advertising before the videos. (Ever been to YouTube?) Not unexpected at all from a publication like Vice. I mean, come on, look at the hipster demographic of the ads.

    Your attack modes are sometimes completely unwarranted, Sceli.

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  23. :) I'll sound bossy again. But, mostly to women. I don't hear that from strong men at all.

    david, you clearly don't have respect for little money. little money piles high over time, if it comes without bother why say no to it?

    you throw little money around like there is no end to it, don't you?

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  24. I have learned a lot about sociopaths. I have learned a lot about myself. The human condition is the same, for all, in many ways. The story of the sociopath is the story of the self, the lack of it, the flexibility of it, the wherewithal of it. It is the same for the empath. At the end of the day, you go to sleep with your self.You are born with it. You die with it.

    In that way, we are all the same, socio or non socio.

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  25. Medusa, today, I asked questions and stated my opinions and observations. None were attacks on my mind.

    Lately I've been warming up to you, particularly because of the way you perceived cats and dogs. So, no attacks to you today.

    I've also meant to tell you that if I were you I'd find a way to turn the roommates' sex into some kind of concert and record it. Meaning, I'd get on my piano and record the piece with occasional moaning coming from the background.

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  26. I assume you tube is making quite a bit of money with those ads, along with the people who post the ads.

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  27. I mean, if M.E. was to come out as female, there'd be the never ending "you're not a sociopath, you're just a dyke/beeper/slut/whore/cripple/cunt/rape survivor/victim" onslaught. Morons saying she's not genetically capable of being a "badass sociopath". It would be harder for her to be taken seriously.

    Females with sociopathic tendencies are more often seen as vengeful victims. Males, the opposite. People will concentrate a lot more on her childhood and Daddy issues than with a dude. Dude will get taken more at face value.

    Men don't have genders, only females do, according to cultural semiotics, and linguistics, even.

    Sceli does have a point in saying that a female sociopath might be seen as a threat to the males, but I doubt that's the main reason, or even a reason at all, that M.E. keeps it vague.

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  28. The sex is too boring to even pay attention to.

    I'll tell ya, if I was living with a fiance, there would be no way in hell we'd be having housemates.

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  29. mmmmm love to love you baybe.

    sceli that would be funny.

    bye

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  30. if medusa makes a movie of herself having sex with her roommates with piano playing classical music in the backroung and emails it to ME maybe ME puts it on instead of the hairy gook talking that wuld make a lot more interesting video

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  31. Playing piano "miserably" whilst trying not to stare longingly at UKan's banana-bread-stuffed asshole is how the script goes, apparently.

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  32. Medusa, I meant what you stated in detail. The loss of credibility when the author is female is empirically proven, no matter what the field is. I now see that my statement was misleading, i'd change 'men' to 'people,' because women also tend to give less credibility to women. Unfortunately, just like there are more criminal men than women in jail there are more successful/leader men in just about every field. I bet even male prostitutes are making more money than women, soon if not already.

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  33. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  34. You just said one million was not a lot, and then 3 sentences later you said it was a lot.

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  35. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  36. What threw me off is that you said "decent" and not "luxurious" lifestlye.

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  37. david, hope you don't mind my doing this.

    you say plurals of 5, unless that's a very british way of saying that you may want to say multiples of 5.

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  38. multiples of 3, I should say to be more david-specific.

    there are plurals of nouns, different concept than multiples of numbers

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  39. I like Davids little expressions lol

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  40. lol Medusa, why don't u just find another place to live if they're pissing you off?

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  41. I was looking around at prices yesterday, actually.

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  42. ..........





    ^See how I just manipulated you guys

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  43. they'll be missed on SW. Before you leave tell us more. The guy is probably bitching to her all the time that she still has not managed to bring you to join them.

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  45. david, do say mutliples of 3, that is correct. plurals of 3 is what you say, and wrong. your written English is better than majority of Americans--so worth suggesting minor improvements.

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  46. david it is called dislexia i have that too i feel for ya but at least we can read and write that counts for something right?

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  47. I don't see any sign of dyslexia in david. learning another language takes a while. multiples of x is more of a mathematical language, not everyday english.

    dyslexia |disˈleksēə|

    a general term for disorders that involve difficulty in learning to read or interpret words, letters, and other symbols, but that do not affect general intelligence.

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  48. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  49. Sociopaths are natural "Big Brothers". Studying people's behaviors and if possible manipulating everything is an addiction to them. Some get very excited once the potential victim is kind of a challenge. ME realized that he gets more to play with, if he discloses just the right amount of info to keep you people chatting here without exposing himself.
    If you want him to post more, keep chatting ok? But ME, this is a two way thing dear. You're feeding us part of yourself too. Thanks!

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  50. Me likey Earth Wind and Fire

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  51. female sociopath might be seen as a threat to the males


    Like eden or nikita? This is a load of shite. There's very few sociopaths on here to begin with and they don't attack people just because they are women.

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  52. M.E., for someone who doesn't come off their cloud to defend themselves this entire post sounded like a defense. I only wonder where it came from. Why so serious?

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  53. who is this potential victim who got ME so worked up he even uploaded an annoying video just to bug them

    and then writes he wants to manipulate by not writing- real power tripper haha, people threatening to use magnifying glass if i dont back off very funny

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  54. This says "Look at M.E.!"

    I told you he is the cockmaster.

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  55. I was thinking the same thing. I couldnt even read it because the whole thing sounds completely defensive. I was disappointed. And il agree now to the female me theory.
    Though was amused and unsurprised to hear you come out and say you actually try to pick fights or rile the room. Glad some of the idiotic posts are that, and not just you buying into people.

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  56. For outing me, Bella, you are denied cock henceforth.

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  57. ME is a machine, picking and symbols (like Bing) from his trashy readership.

    He shakes all our shit balls up in his tin head, let's it harden and rattle for a second or two and out poops the next day's post with a nice bow. Or a knife in it, or all sliced like meatloaf.

    Then we eat our recycled poop.

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  58. I didn't think it sounded defensive. It just sounds like an attempt to give insight into how M.E. decides to operate. The blog is about getting to understand the mind of a sociopath. It seems to me that somewhere along the way it would serve the purpose to explain why a sociopath chooses to do certain things that they do.

    Or maybe M.E. is just sick of getting obnoxious stalker mail begging about what gender is running the blog.

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  59. ^ Sees point about not needing to defend own posts ^

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  60. But ..but, but Cock is my oxygen!

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  61. It is. I am a slime ball.

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  62. It was ME explaining who she is. What is all the big deal about deeper reasons. She explained some reasons behind how she runs the blog. It was straight up and direct. I don't get the attitude you all have, myself.

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  63. Reason why I don't go to church is I think about who is fucking who the entire time. Maybe the youth pastor staring at the highschoolers tits, which choir boy is getting down with one of the elders, etc. Maybe the office lady blowing the Pastor now that is entertainment.

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  64. is ME a he or a she?

    wow this stuff blows my mind or maybe its the pot i just smoked

    a total change of subject-

    the best preventative for hangover is abstinence

    the best preventative for babies is abstinence

    and if ya dont want to risk falling down then dont ever get up crawl on your bellies like a worm!

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  65. Tommy, want to join Gary, Harv and me and go out for a beer? We can bond.

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  66. I always enjoy M.E.s perspective on the blog. Anyhoo, Happy Friday.

    Eden your memoirs would be a fascinating read. I have to agree with Sceli that it would make a great movie.

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  67. sure frank i can have a beer anytime even when im driving because i too am high functioning- i function better when im high

    try tell it to my boss!

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  68. Great, Tom. I am looking forward to it. Damn, getting off the depression medicine has not helped my waist line. I guess I will have a Lite beer.

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  69. After reading American Psycho, I have a strong assumption that Bret Easton Ellis is a psychopath, or probably a narcissist. How could write such a perfect portrayal of a psychopath, Patrick Bateman, without being able to relate? He also states openly in interviews that he is a misogynist.

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  70. M.E you forgot that assholes don't respect Tayler Swift. Only the masses of empaths who think Kanye West is an egotistical prick.

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  71. Jeepers haven, you're right, I never saw it before... I see the benefit of having a flock, completely...
    wait.
    So me, do the defenders do you any good? Is it just because we're on your blog that we're impervious to the reign of defenses? Do they benefit you more in your real life, or do they sort people for you?

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  72. I am generally turned off by when "M.E." writes about his/herself or his/her opinions. They're rather stereotyped, not particularly sophisticated. Which seems to be appropriate, considering the apparent intelligence level of the commenters here. Statement revoked. Touché.

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  73. There are different kinds of intelligence. Sociopaths have the intelligence that gets you places.

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  74. Why all the animosity to M.E? Oh, I almost forgot. Hi Harv Hi Frank.

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  75. i have IQ80 a little below average but a functional IQ100 the same by the way as real tommy and gary ridgway thats enough to get me places ya dont have to be a genious to be a killer

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  76. @Sweet

    What are you doing tonight?

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  77. the narc song lol watch until the end and you'll get it.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IsaW5wLHY64

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  78. now i get what ME meant by manipulating by not writing at least half of the anomynous people writing here are really ME haha respect for fooling me for a while

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  79. Alright, who fart?

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  80. it stank like matzo balls

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  81. Quiet night On my thrid beer. Hello Beautiful Cheeks.

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  82. Cheers to that, Buddy.

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  83. haha this what i meant come on real people wake up tommy is really zwhawk! atack me

    who will be tommys friend tonight who will feed the troll?

    everybody loves tommy because tommy is a real man assertive combative full of hate and loathing not like a passive submissive brasilian lady boy

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  84. Hi frank and harv
    Tom, are you making trouble for my homies?

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  85. Tommy, why don't you join the group, Buddy, rather than be an outsider. What do you say?

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  86. Someone say passive submissive brasilian lady boy?

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  87. WOw I'm smashed right now. Hi SW world. Especially you Eden. xoxo

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  88. Hi Eden So far nothing going on. How about you? Lets rock Vegas one day...

    Hola Haven

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  89. okay i join the crowd what i do next haha is there a movie ?

    is this the beer crowd i think it is i know the names

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  90. I'm watching "The Craigslist Killer".

    Why "especially" me, Haven?
    I should make myself a drink.
    Vegas would be perfect. What will we do there?

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  91. Tear it up Eden! We have to watch at least one good show though. I am in serious need of a fun run. Blow off some manic steam and all

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  92. Come on, Tom. Don't be standoffish.

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  93. Wonderful Tom. Good for you.

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  94. Guys, I have some things to share.

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  95. Harv, may I interrupt you, please? I have some things pressing on my mind.

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  96. Sure, Frank, share, Man.

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  97. lets watch movies what do ya say about these-

    cannibal holocaust new york ripper necromantic night of the loving dead

    i recommend necromantic tonight they are doing dead corpses there and then a guy kills himself while jerking off really sexy movie like a porn movie just very disturbed one haha

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  98. I saw Andrew Dice Clay, the last time I was there.

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  99. Did Haven pass out?

    Eden, how was it? Are you a "show" kind of person? What was your favorite part of Vegas?

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  100. Frank does not need outside gore. Franks wife hates him. Frank is retired. He has step kids who suck. Is this all there is? Frank does not need gory movies when his own life is fucking real life gore.

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  101. Depends on what we're talking about when you say "show"?
    I just love the energy of Vegas in general. I like to go to The Bellagio and watch the water show. And where is it that they set the water on fire?

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  102. Frank, how was your calorie count, today? Did you have portion control?

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  103. Frank abstained from ice cream. Thank you for asking, Gary.

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  104. frank take a few barbs with alcohol live a little relax maybe ya want to kill your wife maybe not it comes naturally if it was meant to be

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  105. What did the scale say, Frank?

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  106. Yeah I guess show is pretty vague. I don't know where that show is, I have only walked the strip once. I have always wanted to see that Beatles show, even though I am normally not a fan of musicals.

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  107. Tom, Frank does not want to do time. Better the old lady dies from cancer or the heart, Buddy.

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  108. Oh Janey you little vixon, I see you.

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  109. I am in a break free mood lately. Shall I burn my bra? Ok, no bra burning, I need them to stay perky but maybe I will burn my underwear. ;)

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  110. no problem everybody dies at time some of us do the time a little bit too but the death row is a nasty bitch nobody wants to go there

    dont they think about the sanctity of human life???

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  111. Not a fan of musicals... why not? I like the classics. Fiddler on the Roof and Grease. They crack me up! What about Across The Universe? Is that the Beatles one you're talking about? I'll post something here for you.

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  112. Especially you Eden b/c you're my favorite woman on here by far.

    I like you too Sweets.

    Totally fab.

    Too much to drink. Loves it and this guy is ridiculous. I can see this is going 'great' places.

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  113. I am a huge Beatles fan and loved that movie, but they had some musical in Vegas live, I will have to find out what it is called. I can always watch Grease, but I don't like that show Glee. I can enjoy a good musical if it catches my interest, but I am not normally into them as a general rule.

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  114. @Haven

    Oh Yeah? Well there's a good start to the weekend. You been holding out on me, eh?

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  115. A general rule? I never understood that phrase. I bet you break a lot of the rules you make for yourself.

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  116. I do Eden HA. I am not drawn to musicals as some of my friends are who love them, yet I can enjoy a few of them.

    Do you thrive on breaking rules self made or not?

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  117. Let's not talk about rules anymore.
    What show will we see in Vegas

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  118. What do you mean, Tommy. I can't follow your train of though, Buddy?

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  119. What is our purpose here? Frank had woman. Frank had money. He was not rich. He was lower middle class. Frank bought toys. Is that all there is? Frank does not mean to be morbid, but what is the meaning of life?

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  120. I love the topic of breaking rules!

    Let's see a Thunder Down Under just for shits and giggles. Have you heard of that LOL

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  121. Frank, it seems like you are not seeking out things in life that you would really like. You would be enjoying them if you were.

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  122. Oh Eden... never holding out on you! Anything you wanna know I'm all yours.

    I could only get through like half of that video though. Too soft and mellow. I'm more rough and hard myself.

    xoxo

    You're a doll Sweets

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  123. Like eden or nikita? This is a load of shite.

    Neither of them are sociopaths or called themselves sociopaths.

    Though was amused and unsurprised to hear you come out and say you actually try to pick fights or rile the room.

    I thought she was saying she posts topics in order to rile the room, not comments. She's making it sound like a bassass manipulation though, but doesn't any normal person do things and say to themselves, "I wonder how people are gonna react."

    I think it's right, though, that she doesn't get very involved because there needs to be some sort of 'control'. 'Control' as in a stable element and foundation, not 'control' as in controlling something.

    I do hear an element of defensiveness, though, and I wonder if it has anything to do with us talking about her 'death wish'.

    After reading American Psycho, I have a strong assumption that Bret Easton Ellis is a psychopath, or probably a narcissist.

    Actually, he has said this himself. Google some interviews. First he said he was writing about his father, and then later he admitted he was writing about himself. I have a personal connection to BEE, and lived in the same very specific world from/about whence/which he wrote many of his books, but I cannot say more than that without giving myself away.

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  124. Are you serious?! I don't like men in guy panties. But I'll go, and you'll just have to owe me.

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  125. @ Matzo ball comment

    Pretty funny, as I'm sick right now and have been wanting some and thinking about it a lot the past couple days.

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  126. sweet sweet jane when you smile

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  127. Sweet, Have you ever gone beyond it all, everything you thought would make you happy, and they all failed?

    Frankie is there . Frankie has done all he wanted. Frankie is sitting with himself, naked. Is this all there is, Sweet.

    I have a song that tells how Frankie feels, Sweetest.

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  128. This is Frank



    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCRZZC-DH7M

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  129. @Medusa

    I don't think people would care much, if you gave yourself away. David did, didn't he? Yeah. I assume he was writing AP about himself.

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  130. "Anything you wanna know I'm all yours."

    I will keep that in mind. I like when you drink. ;)

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  131. It's not that I care about others, it's that I care about myself.

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  132. Who even knows about me, on this site?

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  133. Eden I was totally kidding, I would rather go to a female strip show in Vegas. That sounds like fun as a start (:

    Frank, there is always more out there, but you seem hell bent on sitting in your shit at the moment.

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  134. You, me and David.

    Although i wish he would say yarmulke instead of kippah.

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  135. Frank is having a mid-life crisis.

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  136. Frank is in a time of reflection, Sweet Cheeks. I know you care, hun. Thank you for that. Frankie will bounce back.

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  137. I don't want to watch a bunch of crazy women strip. I want a show from you.

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  138. Never date a man in the middle of a mid-life crisis. For both your good and his.

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  139. Fiddler on the roof is amazing. I want to make my husband watch it. The music is incredible, but topel makes it, hands down.

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  140. Fucking Frank. I'd love to help put you out of your misery.

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  141. Yes, Medusa. Have you ever fucked all the woman you wanted? Frank has been there, Medusa. Frank has done it all. What next? Another woman? More money? More people patting Frank on the back and saying "Good job" for Franks janitorial work. It means little, Medusa. If this is a Mid life crisis, then Frank has one, Damn it.

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  142. Was in a production of Fiddler. With a bunch on non-Jews. I quit before the actual performance. Wasn't a fan of drama-club kids, and they ruined Enya for me.

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  143. You sound like such a snob Medusa.

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  144. I am a snob.

    Although right now I'm just talkin' shit.

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  145. Apparently I need to watch the Fiddler on the Roof this week. I have been in need of a new recommendation.

    Eden + Sweetcheeks in vegas would be trouble on wheels all around and like it!

    I am drinking a beer and listening to Johnny Cash right now.

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  146. @Sweet

    Does that mean I'm getting a show from you then? I have a little tradition I'd like to keep. In Vegas there must be public sex, at least once.

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  147. missus do u worry about some lass stealing your man

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  148. Can I just say how much I love being single and not obsessed with anyone.

    Obsession brings my IQ down a good 50 points.

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  149. So does weed, so having two IQ destroyers at once would render me limping and drooling, unable to form words.

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  150. All narcissists are snobs :D

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  151. Lol. Obsession will do that. But even you can't be single forever.

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  152. My IQ has always been a waste on me. The only use it's had so far is playing into my sisters' ridiculous assumptions, that I know more shit than I do... and making them believe a bunch of rubbish.

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  153. i obsess and I LIKE IT my man is all to ME

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  154. It's not a waste if you put it into your memoir. Or even put the fact that your IQ has been a waste in your memoir. Which, ironically, would be making use of your IQ.

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  155. Well then Sweets? What be your answer?

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  156. One doesn't obsess if one doesn't like it, Jane, I'm just saying there are sacrifices to be made and you choose your battles.

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  157. because you get swept up by narcissists. You can't just hide under q rock forever. You'll turn into a cat lady. :-)
    And IQ is never a waste unless you waste it. Although admittedly sometimes it does suck to know too much.

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  158. Eden, I have to leave something for your fantasy right? I will admit, I am a little shy in that area. I have never done a girl on girl before.

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  159. Yeah, but now that narcissists are so easily recognizable (see: shaman), what am I left with?

    I'm thinking that anyone worth their salt in brains is going to be narcissistic to a generally larger degree than the average.

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  160. if you're obsessive, maybe that's just how you are. Don't try not to be that way. I agree with choosing your battles though. That doesn't mean you have to try to suppress yourself. Just try to find outlets for your obsessions. And outlets for your type.

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  161. I already knew that. And that's ok. I'm the one in control anyway. That's how you'd want it regardless of inexperience.

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  162. i will steal him and please him

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  163. if you're obsessive, maybe that's just how you are. Don't try not to be that way.

    It's a question of where I direct my obsessions, not necessarily getting rid of them.

    And then reading on I see that you just said that.

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  164. Not always. Sometimes people are impressive without being a narcissist. In my experience the ones worth anything are self centered, but everyone is... people grow out of that though. Its a developmental stage people go through. Establishing yourself, thinking youre the shit, then meeting someone you also think is the shit. With narcissists, you'll never be equal. Try to figure out why thats what you look for. You don't seem to feel unequal, so what is it your hiding. You act on it.

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  165. This is why one of my favorite words is sublimation.

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  166. I love eating soup out of bread bowls

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  167. I like association.
    Why are you so into narcissists? I know what you like about them, but what is it about you that finds them? Why are you drawn to them?

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  168. 1. Likely quite a bit narcissistic myself in some ways and look for mirrors, so it's only natural that I function as one from time to time.

    2. I want to know if they know/have something that I don't, and if they do, I figure it out and take it. Related to #1

    3. They always, always find me. I don't find them, I just respond to them. Though I suppose that's splitting hairs.

    I'm very unique even just by first glace, not just in physical attributes but in how I present myself, so I suppose that's the initial draw for those looking for something 'more special' than the rest. I kind of resent the expectation that goes along with it, though.

    4. I like well-dressed hot interesting guys, related to #3.

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  169. We can eat clam chowder out of bread bowls in Vegas Eden

    You don't like strip clubs?

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  170. So if you're into sublimation, would you say youre repressed? Like you're trying not to like things that you do? What are your social inclinations. Is it just because you've been burned?

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  171. As the guy would got to me the most said, "You're just like me, only more tan!"

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  172. Sublimation means directing an energy elsewhere besides the immediate, the obvious, the instinctual.

    Doesn't necessarily mean repression. In fact, by definition it's the opposite.

    It's repression only if I don't direct it anywhere at all.

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  173. @Sweet

    I like strip clubs just fine. I heard Vegas has the very best. Strippers love it when a woman comes to play. Especially if they think you're straight. They're way more flirty. I always want to touch though. I don't want to just sit and watch.

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  174. I think it sounds like you like the status, and proving youre better. I'm wondering where that comes from. Like you said its narcissisctic to an extent, but than why do you like guys that think they're better than you? Is it a challenge? I guess you said that, but than why do you have so much to prove? And how are. You the one that gets burned?

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  175. Narcissists are convenient self- dis tractors.

    They force you to go outside yourself in every way. You can just about be invisible. You don't have to think "what should I be doing today?" You can forget all your responsibilities to yourself because you live for them. It's great if you don't like to follow through for yourself. They are convenient procrastination tools.

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  176. I think when you take it to the obsessive degree that you do that it is obsession.

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  177. @Bella

    Are you saying I should leave mine

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  178. Repression... I was multi tasking. Sorry.

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