So this post came across a little strongly against aspies. Maybe just a little. I was very careful not to advocate any sort of violence against aspies, but still...
It's not that I dislike aspies. I actually really like them for their loyalty and all of their other good traits. If it seems like I'm down on aspies, it's only because I'm jealous of their superior social position. The truth is that if the aspies asked me to join their club, i would say yes in a heartbeat. I'm like Lindsay Lohan's character in Mean Girls and the aspies are the cool crowd. I'll talk trash and pretend I'm better, but if I got invited to one of their parties I would stay up all night deciding what to wear. (Ah, Molly Ringwald... interested in being a sociopath spokesperson?)
Sometimes I even claim to be an aspie myself. Who wouldn't? If for nothing else, for the aspie pride t-shirts! I mean, I have some of the signs: inability to pick up social cues, weak sense of empathy, inability to conform to social norms. All I would have to do is tone down the charm. If I can pass amongst the empaths, certainly I can keep a low profile amongst the remarkably unaware aspies. And who knows, maybe all sociopaths are aspies. Just like the movie Underworld, where all the vampires and werewolves are long lost cousins, socios and aspies can finally realize that we're really just two sides of the same coin. What do you say, aspies? Ready to become one big family?
I can't wait! We could have family reunions or conventions. It could be as popular as Comic-Con! In fact, let's have all the socios dress as vampires and the aspies as werewolves and go to Comic-Con next year! It's going to be so great. Say you will, little aspies. Say you will.
It's not that I dislike aspies. I actually really like them for their loyalty and all of their other good traits. If it seems like I'm down on aspies, it's only because I'm jealous of their superior social position. The truth is that if the aspies asked me to join their club, i would say yes in a heartbeat. I'm like Lindsay Lohan's character in Mean Girls and the aspies are the cool crowd. I'll talk trash and pretend I'm better, but if I got invited to one of their parties I would stay up all night deciding what to wear. (Ah, Molly Ringwald... interested in being a sociopath spokesperson?)
Sometimes I even claim to be an aspie myself. Who wouldn't? If for nothing else, for the aspie pride t-shirts! I mean, I have some of the signs: inability to pick up social cues, weak sense of empathy, inability to conform to social norms. All I would have to do is tone down the charm. If I can pass amongst the empaths, certainly I can keep a low profile amongst the remarkably unaware aspies. And who knows, maybe all sociopaths are aspies. Just like the movie Underworld, where all the vampires and werewolves are long lost cousins, socios and aspies can finally realize that we're really just two sides of the same coin. What do you say, aspies? Ready to become one big family?
I can't wait! We could have family reunions or conventions. It could be as popular as Comic-Con! In fact, let's have all the socios dress as vampires and the aspies as werewolves and go to Comic-Con next year! It's going to be so great. Say you will, little aspies. Say you will.
