My husband asked me to write my thoughts on how it is I put up with him as a sociopath, so after some thought I've decided to indulge him. I don't typically like to let him into this many of my thoughts, but I think it'll be an interesting post to the many on this site who've long been wondering about him. And I think it's a good thing to be open about, even if vicariously.To start with a bit about myself, I am a rational personality type, so my underlying motive for my life is to understand things. In my past I have always dated people I was curious about. Curiosity is my idea of interest, or caring, if you will. Every man I dated was bizarre to say the least, and I will not choose here to go into that further.My husband is no exception to strangeness, not because like some idiots on here think that he's complicated and so full of dimension, but because he is so simple. The tedious thing about exes is that though they all vary dramatically socially, and often think they're different, they tend to be simple, and the same fundamentally. Like Asians, they start to all look alike.Just kidding.But seriously, most people are too simple once you discover their issues of particularity. In some cases I'd try to help them grow up but their inherent blindness to themselves and their own simplicity is even more tedious. They're inherent undesire to change and fears of coping all begin to look alike, no matter how variable.With my husband, his natural complexity is not in how he doesn't deal with some glaring issue, but in elusiveness and nonchalance about his glaring issues. It consistantly amuses me how he deflects others from who he is, and pulls their own glaring issues to a forefront. I don't get bored of my husband because he never ceases to amuse me with his naturalness and fundamental-ness. He has impulses and he follows them. No fronts.I call him a Demon because it has a natural symbolic picture of who he is. He tries to convince me that he isn't, or tries to convince himself sometimes that he's human, but he just isn't. Everything for him all falls back onto a few inherent humanistic desires like sex, territoriality, amusement, procreation, vanity or pride etc. His lack of any social rounding amuses me and never ceases to feed my curiosity not because he's trying to be complicated, but because he's so fundamentally simple.I hate when people try to add fluff to who they are; meaning, or reasoning to something that breaks down so simply. My husband just comes out as simple, and I don't tire of it.I suppose that's a bit of a contradiction; not being bored of my husband because he's simple, but that's how I am.So to advise the silly people who come on here with ideals about their sociopath being so complex, stop projecting your "Complications" on something so inherently uncomplicated and you'll begin to understand that just because you like to sugar coat things with your emotions, that doesn't mean the rest of the world does.A sociopath is not a sensitive man with deep poetic complexities, but an animal seeking amusement. You are expendable, as you have the specialness of an ant. Unless you can see him for what he is, or get him to show you what he is.My success with my husband is not that I idolically look up to him with blind batting lashes, but that I see that he's just an animal, and that I cope with the shallowness of reality, and can demand no more from him than he's capable of. I am satisfied by the reality of our relationship, and ask for no delusions. Though sometimes they feel nice, I'd rather have the cold reality.Bad things happen for good reasons.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Dealing with my Sociopath: Yes UKan, Yes UKan, yes UKan!
From UKan's wife: