Thursday, May 9, 2013

Song: Use Me

I have been swimming to this song recently and have been loving the lyrics. People always wonder why someone might choose to be in a relationship with a sociopath: "I want to spread the news that if it feels this good getting used, oh you just keep on using me until you use me up."


My friends feel it's their appointed duty
They keep trying to tell me all you want to do is use me
But my answer yeah to all that use me stuff
Is I want to spread the news that if it feels this good getting used
Oh you just keep on using me until you use me up
Until you use me up

My brother sit me right down and he talked to me
He told me that I ought not to let you just walk on me
And I'm sure he meant well yeah but when our talk was through
I said brother if you only knew you'd wish that you were in my shoes
You just keep on using me until you use me up
Until you use me up

Oh sometimes yeah it's true you really do abuse me
You get in a crowd of high class people and then you act real rude to me
But oh baby baby baby baby when you love me I can't get enough
I and I want to spread the news that if it feels this good getting used
Oh you just keep on using me until you use me up
Until you use me up

Talking about you using me but it all depends on what you do
It ain't too bad the way you're using me
'Cause I sure am using you to do the things you do
Ah ha to do the things you do

74 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. good song like it a lot

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    2. Yes, excellent song!

      I'm discovering that all it takes is for one to pay me some small bit of attention, and I'll keep coming back for more.

      You may find it funny that I hadn't looked too deeply into narcissism due to its negative connotation here. It's like sociopaths put themselves on some kind of pedestal, and narcissism sits below them, always illuminated but never itself shining. I'm fairly certain that's called irony.

      I have recently been labeled a narcissist, and I certainly exhibit some of the key defining attributes. I am hypersensitive to both insults and praise, and vulnerable to shame. I have a tendency to brag, and overestimate my capabilities in nearly every area. I do sometimes like to be the center of attention.

      However, I am keenly aware of the boundaries of others, and hesitant to cross them, though I do dip my finger in others' tranquil pool to watch the ripples. I am prone to neither narcisstic abuse nor rage. And I think I can see the world from the perspective of others, enough at least to try and step into their shoes and dance around a bit.

      Thus my major weaknesses that make me susceptible to the influence of others stem from narcissism, but I seem to have other more potentially disastrous aspects largely, though not completely, under control.

      Yes, I am a tool. However, if I am a shovel whose handle is of smooth finish, it should be my goal to grow thorns so that a simple, subtle caress is not enough for someone to take hold of me, to grasp and use.

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    3. You are a unique and beautiful snowflake, like a piece of paper folded up that's had pieces cut out. You may feel like there's something wrong with you, but rather than trying to fill those holes, why not try living with them? A pair of pretty eyes may catch attention, but there needs to be something interesting behind them in order to keep it.

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    4. I hear you, Quasi. One way to take off that mask is to force yourself to be honest, to force yourself to show who you are. When you do, you will get all sorts of reactions. Some people will shame you, humiliate you and scorn you but others will give you a hand up. In time, you can walk away from the people who shame you because your real self will be stronger. You are starting that process, already, by being honest on here. I, for one, am on your side!

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    5. That's tricky, though! Part of my mask in real life requires hiding my narcissism. People are really not impressed by my bragging and invasion of privacy, and my sentiments that the world owes me. Not 5 years ago, I fit the narcissist bill perfectly. To take the mask off would be severely counterproductive. No, I think it's important I change what's under the mask before I attempt to remove it, don't you agree?

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    6. That was/is so nice, Andy Glass.

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    7. I meant to remove it on here. That is what I did and now I am trying to remove it more in my real life.

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    8. Has anyone read Swan Song? It's one of my favorite books and I've never met anyone that's read it. In the book, masks grow over people's faces, and when they come off each person's face shows their nature. It's a darkly beautiful post-apocalyptic story, I highly recommend it.

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    9. what's under the mask will not change without being shown and seen, i think. we grow in relation to others and to the other in ourselves. even the mask though ment to hide something reflects something true of the person whose wearing it.

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    10. Looking at my past through the eyes I imagine a sociopath has was like seeing everything through a pair of awesome shades. Everything is darker, feels colder, and I'm some mysterious enigmatic figure that looks badass.

      In reality, I'm struggling to reconcile my inability to be seen by others as anything but a social outcast, when in fact I'm rather well-liked. I hate being around people, I absolutely hate it. Solitary confinement is a dream. Why can I hide the fact that I want to be alone so well? How do I pull that off? I must be tricking people somehow, manipulating or charming them. I cannot be liked for who I am, I cannot! And if people are drawn to me, if they get too close, I shove them away. When they see the real me, the me who is alone, they'll reject me. I won't let that happen, they'll never get close enough to hurt me, NEVER!

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    11. Quasi
      That is shame and it is a lie, although I believe it about myself ~

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    12. I suddenly don't find myself all that interesting anymore, just the specter of a broken child.

      I think I'm gonna pull a Jessi and split.

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    13. Did Jessi leave? Why? At any rate, someone very wise told me this when I wanted to leave. If you can make it here, you can be strong for real life. STAY :)

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    14. i wonder what you will do to somebody who hears "come close, make me feel loved!" all the effort just to shove them away? or you suck them out first? don't make others stand up for the chaos inside yourself. clean up for yourself and enjoy what you can share with others if you show your real face.
      or just have fun with your mask. it's a good one, women love the mission to heal a man's heart.

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    15. claudine this is very interesting comment for me.

      I have met men who want the mission to heal my heart and all i want to say is that i am sorry. If i meet someone and fall for them and am tempted to heal their heart with my arrow, this is too much stimulation and someone inevitably bails or sabotages.


      I do not think this combination works, 2 people trying to heal one another. THere is too much risk. At least One of them must be iron and trustworthy without fear. ANd they are the ones who will get dumped.


      Yes men lllooooove to get you to pity their broken hearts and wait on them with soup and kisses to the heart. fuck them all. this last idiot even in the end tried to tell me for the thousandth time why he is closed. as if it is my business and/or explains his cheating. He wanted me to stay . transparently s e l f i s h. Once they know you dont pity them and they know they cannot control your love with puppy dog eyes (I will gauge them out and they can tell) they leave.

      I cannot go on and concentrate on getting intimacy..maybe it is not in my cards, or maybe there is only so far a person can get and *I* am the bottomless pit . I am inclined to retire my name for the mo.

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    16. wrong... he had NEVER admitted he was closed. He pretended to be open.

      Me, I admitted to being fearful the entire time.


      Maybe this is my mistake, and i should keep all cards inside at all costs even way into the second year of relationship? ? ?

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    17. wrong person to admit to being afraid?

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    18. hey intimacy,
      i don't think it is ever wrong to admit something true. but it isn't guaranteed that your exspectations that go with it are met. my idea of a relationship is: give what you want to give. get as much as you want of what the other wants to give. ask for what you want. don't blame the other if you don't get it. say no if the other wants something you don't want to give. in the case that you are not able to share anything this way reconsider the match.
      there are no presctiptions only negotiations.

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    19. Claudine you are right. I am making strides and your description fits what i have been doing..

      This one: "ask for what you want. don't blame the other if you don't get it."
      I have trouble with this one. I think it is shame related becuse i do not want to be "needy" I have been learning that needy is not the same as wanting. There is nothing wrong with wanting, and that is a biggie... i do not think i will get. When I do, i can hardly believe it. Normal people say what they want and have no bones abt it. I always compromise myself for the crumbs because that is what i got.. and i choose those who offer crumbs.


      I know this is my power crushed. I will resurrect it. I yield to their whims bec i believe if i don't, they will leave. It is process.

      Thank you so much for your words, Claudine. I will heed that shit.

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    20. am trying to heed that shit, too ;)
      i realized only lately that i do want things. and i start to go for it - although the shame can feel like dying.
      what is wrong about being needy? people have needs. it doesn't mean we are dependent in the first place. we can choose how to deal with this needs. we can chose compromise or we can go for all or nothing, we can negotiate unforseen results, we can do whatever we want.

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  2. You see these songs sung by woman more than men.

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    Replies
    1. Because most men are just looking for somewhere warm and wet to park their cock XD

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    2. Yep, it struck me funny to hear a man talking about being abused.

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    3. Well, he does say at the end,

      "'Cause I sure am using you to do the things you do"

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    4. Women don't usually admit to using men or allowing men to use them. He's just putting it all out there and somehow it's all good. Honesty is a wonderful thing.

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    5. Well said Lyra

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    6. Sounds like he is dating a wealthier woman. He's probably that hot but impoverished outcast guy and she's torn between the shame her friends and family give her and her attraction to him. Yet he is always there for her. Maybe gives her adventure. A taste of the less sheltered pristine side of life. While he achieves higher status by dating her. If this is autobiographical and this woman knew him shortly before the peak of his fame it could have been partly due to her connections. Just a thought because I have that much time on my hands...

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    7. I know a guy who is singing this song. She is a rich borderline bitch, widow of a really rich husband; and he is a hunk every which way, was raised in a humble home but his good looks made him a jigolo all the way.

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    8. It's probably only a particular kind of person who would willingly put up with such abuse.

      I imagine that it might be comforting, in a way at first, like being wrapped tightly in warm embrace, only to discover further down the line that you are being constricted, suffocating, slowly...

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    9. Lately I've been thinking about the scene in the movie The Wall where the one flower engulfs the other....not sure if that's what's really happening in that scene but that's what I perceive it as and it's been popping up in my head lately...not sure that's a good thing lol.

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    10. The woman singing the song is a borderline bitch.


      Could you be more stupid? Seriously?

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    11. Umm, you might want to read that a bit more carefully.

      "I know a guy who is singing this song. She is a rich borderline bitch".
      That's not quite the same as the singer being a borderline bitch, now is it?

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    12. Oh, the benefits of posting anonymously. One never has to think before the keys start clacking, and when you're done the only one who has to know you're a moron is yourself.

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    13. lol

      Lyra i will always admit to use and being used as a fine thing. To my GIRLFRIENDS.

      we women cant advertise to the man. God forbid they feel threatened with the possible effect of their own similar behaviour. You cant tell them. they cant hack it, most of them..

      I am so sorry male players out there, but you are not a match for a girl player. 9 times out of ten you will get scorched. You will love us as we are walking out the door. Dont you love us madly.

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    14. lol i am narcish giddy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    15. Ha! Now I've got that song stuck in my head.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrv7Hs7k7w8

      Thanks for that, Mable. I love the Doors.

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    16. you're welcome, G.E.

      I think players like it when you fuck them up. I think they find it thrilling. Why all the joy in this song?

      Sometimes i see in their eyes like they are watching their mom finally take no shit from dad or something. I have seen this look . It's a happy idiot smiling "nod' when they're getting stung.

      Players what is that? Respect, i presume. Funny how you can get that from pissing on them.

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  4. ME, I love your taste in music.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Replies
    1. Really? I was thinking more along the lines of:

      http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=HxUuDPNbkJk&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DHxUuDPNbkJk

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    2. It's Thursday, Monica. :p

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    3. Forgive me, Alterego

      Torrid Thursday Themes

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    4. Missed Regulars and their Classic Themes


      Theme for that Shining Beauty, Ellicit

      I love this song :)

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    5. Theme for Intimacy Anon

      Love,
      Themes

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    6. THank you Themes. x

      I even just left another line of mucus here on another day's post. You make me feel btter tho.

      Delete
  6. MonicaMay 8, 2013 at 8:37 AM
    That is a great comment, UKan. Want to be friends?

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  7. M.E. you're a bitch, a low-life loser who relishes in all the negative things you've done to other people. Well guess what? You're going to be a lonely, sad woman with a cat/ferret/hamster and a bottle of gin. No one will fall for your "charm" once the word gets around town, and people realize what a socio-path you are. Also, I know who the fuck you are.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you now?
      Well don't you sound like a bitter, twisted specimen :)
      I know I'm curious as hell who M.E. really is. Care to enlighten me? Or are you just plain ol' full of crap?

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    2. Plain crap is my guess

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    3. Someone got dumped by a Mormon law professor in California, didn't they?

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    4. Yep, mine too.
      Just another tough guy sociopath slayer like our little Jessi.
      Care to prove us wrong, badass?

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    5. I don't care to know who M.E is.

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    6. Amazon states her name is Monica E. Thomas

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    7. oops pseudonym

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    8. That's your big proof?!
      There is no facepalm great enough to express what I think about that.

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    9. You seem so angry, green eyes. Why?

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    10. Huh?
      What makes you say that? I'm not angry at all. In fact, I'm in a pretty good mood.

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    11. lol @108 !

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    12. Eden Ralene September 8, 2011 3:56 AM
      Her purpose for writing her book. M.E.?

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    13. Ah, Sociopath World. I love logging in here after a particularly trying day, because it can be guaranteed that I'll find someone who's life is suckier than mine. Anon, you may know who M.E is and you may not. I'm thinking you don't, because I seriously doubt that anyone who has treated you as badly as you seem to think you've been treated would write a confessional memoir with your good self included in it.

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    14. CEO SociopathworldMay 10, 2013 at 6:35 PM

      "Ah, Sociopath World. I love logging in here after a particularly trying day, because it can be guaranteed that I'll find someone who's life is suckier than mine."


      We're happy to oblige, anon. *tips hat*

      Delete
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  9. Up From The SofaMay 9, 2013 at 6:31 PM

    If you would have told me that the bones and sinews were knit together like this, I would have laughed. If not laughed, not believed.

    You were telling me to go against my eyes and ears and believe you. I wade in the pool, feet flapping until I see that it was not at all what you said. Then, I dance a happy dance, unto myself

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  10. I leave a response whenever I like a post on a site or if I have something to valuable to
    contribute to the conversation. It's a result of the fire communicated in the article I browsed. And after this post "Song: Use Me". I was actually excited enough to write a thought :-P I do have 2 questions for you if you do not mind. Is it just me or does it look like some of these comments appear like coming from brain dead folks? :-P And, if you are posting at other sites, I would like to follow you. Would you list the complete urls of all your community pages like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

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    ReplyDelete
  11. This post trivializes how much there is to love about some of you. Its nothing to with liking to be used- that's just what some of us will tolerate- no one is perfect.

    ReplyDelete

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