Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Love can be a profoundly intellectual marvel. It is not possible to be barren here, unless you have no values whatsoever. Anyone can recognize that a human is copacetic, pleasant, and that he or she contributes to your pleasure. Anyone can love. My real dilemma is settling down and staying hooked.
I've tried to propose open relationships, and, for a time, did everything I could to avoid the “girlfriend” label, but people are fairly predictable, and, since I do aspire to have a few of them like me, they tend to choke on that toxin.
I don't get why I have to stay with one man or woman. Even if I love him or her to death, I hunger for more, if only to make them interesting again in terms of how I feel.
It's easier now then it used to be. Before I came to concede that I was never going to connect with another emotionally, I'd get irate when I could not, and would leave for another in the pursuit of fresh passion. Presently, sex is casual, and I don't expect to be wrapped up in the ones I am with. When I decide to cheat, as they put it, it's because I am searching for an absorbing way to pass the hours, and exploring is an effective method of occupying my attention. It's never an insult against the others, and I wish I could kill their jealousy.
In the meantime, I hold that I am entitled to my privacy, and it's nobody's business who else shares a bed with me – not even the business of those already in it.