UKan: Still here mates. I think ill get out of the game before I hit those numbers. Then again I said that this was temporary over a decade ago and again a few years back.The game is what it is. Its the most tempting of mistresses. You start out dreaming of the fancy stuff you'll have and the fast money only to find out that its just as much of a hardship as any other business. The first few years are tough. Sometimes I look back and wonder how I made it this far with all the stupid naive moves I made at the beginning.Today I finished moving in a real fancy house next to the lake. I met my neighbor, who's husband is a attorney. My other neighbors only stay in their homes on vacation. Its very quiet. No smog, just trees, stars, and i can see lightning far off in the distance though its summer. So much different than the city life.Still its never enough. My wife wont have children till I have quit the game. I've been stuffing money away to get a legitimate business, but it just seems like no business is as lucrative, and even my small empire is so hard to leave. Its my baby. I've put everything into it. I sacraficed my friendships and my life in general to where I am left to a few trusted blokes. This is why I understand these tigers. Even making billions they still could not leave. The game is a black hole. It sucks in everything and everyone around it. One day we all must pay the price.
Still at the end of the day I feel so fortunate. The near escapes, my prison sentance being overturned, that one person I met who gave me a consignment I originally turned down, or that hit on me that was never successful. In reality I sit on this smart phone writing this ambgious story of fractions from my life I know I can never tell in full. Even if I did no one would believe it but my close friends. Today I live free and I live a good life. However there is not a day that goes by that I don't remember the dark days of when I had to struggle between life and death to get here.
Why do you want to get out of the Game? Not why should you get out of the Game. What things matter most to you in life?
"The game is a black hole. It sucks in everything and everyone around it. One day we all must pay the price."OMG. go fuck yourself you cum stain...lol
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Ukan = faaaaag
Check out:http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2011/07/28/exp.am.maureen.hancock.cnn?hpt=hp_midThe Medium Next Door...
Erin do you have any idea of how many times you compared me to what you call your socio?Every time i try to make contact you say i remind you of him.I wonder why that is.I will answer my own question since you have no idea, 4 times now Erin.My adorable Erin.You sure you dont want to give me your email?We could talk i could help you im willing to.
'Hubbard told detectives at the police station that she tried to break off the baby’s arm so she could eat it.'For more on the story Google 'woman charged after snatching..."
If you want to do it.Just tell, then i will tell how to do it.
To give me your email so we talk.I know what you want, you think you need guidance, but you dont need it, you want it.Im sure im very far away from you dont worry i dont intend to kill you or anything.
Shine your light on me, and let my darkness comfort you.I mean no harm.
I wish to ask you personal information.I know you wrote many things on the blog already but i want know more about your life.If you are confortable answering those question here ok.What's your first memory?
Look how desperate
erin. are you alone? who is this anon you are giving away your secrets to? don't let them exploit you my beloved.
i was sure you could tell the difference. how do you know me? what is your clue when i come to visit?
God damn it. I want to lead a drug cartel. All those people who made money, through drugs, though were from Colombia.Erin stop making everything relate to you. Not everything relates to every one. -_-
i am a male. should i have kept that secret from you? i know nothing of this angel anon. you fascinate me.
i am. if i sound as though i have a female side, i'm not surprised or ashamed. i am flexible, and give whatever side of myself is needed at the time. you needed gentle at that time so that is what i gave you.
what makes u polar opposites sweet erin? am i not as sweet to you as you are to me?
omg shut up erin. you don't have to respond to every trivial comment on this blog and we've heard enough about YOUR SOCIO. don't even respond this post cos i'm not going to answer back.
i was born in late december. so you have concluded in your mind that i am a sociopath. i thought i was doing so well in keeping that from you.
Anonymous said...i am. if i sound as though i have a female side, i'm not surprised or ashamed. i am flexible, and give whatever side of myself is needed at the time. you needed gentle at that time so that is what i gave you.July 30, 2011 10:30 AM
erin. i am by nature a devil. my compulsions drive me to ruin any who get too close. on here, you are safe from me. i can be all affection and tenderness when we meet. but only in this place. you are safe in this place.
Hey erin, I literally want you to die, and I've never even met you. What do you think of that?
how old are you, erin?
The sad part is jason that you have so little to say that you have to hide in anons just so you wont get ridiculed anymore. Even erin has more interesting things to say than you, and that is pitiful.
erin. i can't tell you if it's the same. it's very hard for me to explain what happens when someone becomes my mate. there is a great hunger there before i make them mine. i feel that if i wanted to, i could posses them as a demon would. take 9over their mind.i long to see them reflect in their actions, my affect on them. it excites me when they finally surrender everything to me.this is when the change happens.the compulsion takes over, and i must obey it.once my mate is in a state of complete euphoria, i feel it is my duty to force her back into cold reality. make her see that she has mistaken my need to consume her, for love. I set a corrosive force in motion. dissolve everything she knew in her heart to be true.i can't help myself. it's the devil in me.
do you see me as evil now?
Anon 12:36, what useually happens after you forse them back to reality?Wher does it go from there?
*smashes face out back of head with cataclysmic face palm*
congats erin. you're the first female to enter the never zone of extreme faggyness.erin = extreme faggotthat shits official.
@tikthey leave me no choice but to rage. empaths have this interesting need to cling to their illusions. once the truth is out, they refuse to accept it.they would rather accept the life a devil would give them, than to give up the beauty of the fire he lit inside them.no one will ever make you feel more alive than someone who can breathe your fantasy from the story books, into flesh.no one will ever make you feel so much anguish, when the book is closed forever.they mistake this anguish for the despair true love brings, because they have never felt so much intensity.i have no choice but to leave them in pieces. but fist i have to crush them, so they never forget.
erin. this is the whole truth of what i am. im sure you sociopath was far more merciful.
Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Anon.You. Are. A. PU-SSY
Anon, what would you do if they stayed, keep up the process of crushing them?Is this what you want? Them to leave you?
tik. if they were to leave me first, i would hunt them down. my compulsion drives me to leave them in pieces. no one leaves if they've been crushed.i would draw them back in till they are sure of my remorse, and then finish the job. if they don't leave me, it is inevitable that i will become bored and leave.erin. i never go back. i can't imagine why i would need to. can you?
Peeplez r so cunfuzingz
erin. it has taken longer than you may imagine. i never saw it this way in my younger years. i always felt like they were just wrong for me. i never stood still enough to see the patterns.it wasn't till a long time friend of mine handed me my wrap sheet so to speak, on failed relationships. he was joking around about it, i don't think he knew just how close to the truth he really was.i started to pay more attention from then on.
Rip meets weird people's on subwayz
erin. i can't be with my own kind either. as you have probably seen here. it just becomes a battle of who can outwit the other.it becomes a game of who can cause the most devastation.i say all this in seriousness because if i were to make jokes, you wouldn't see it for what it really is.
Have you ever loved somebody so muchThat you can barely breath when you're with 'emThen you suffocate to death.
"Have you ever loved somebody so muchThat you can barely breath when you're with 'emThen you suffocate to death."It is a fucking Eminem lyric dumbass... Fucking shit.
Yeh I was just making a dumb joke
It's my job.
i am 43. and i dont feel the need to punish in the beginning. if you never get too close, i will always treat you the same as everyone else. if you are generating money for me, i will always treat you with respect. that is, unless you are in the way of me reaching the next level.if you are not of use to me, i treat you with indifference. but if you become my mate or friend, you are eventually going to show me things about yourself, that may make you seem inferior to me.that's where it begins.my advise to everyone who starts showing an interest; dont get attached. keep it on a sex only basis, or you're going to get burned.
"if i were to make jokes, you wouldn't see it for what it really is."The joke teller is the only person who is "in on it." Masturbating, hullo. Making fun OF the other person, not trying to make them laugh.... Gotta wonder why people laugh at their own jokes.
"keep it on a sex only basis, or you're going to get burned."Why does this sound familiar?
erin. what if i were a woman sociopath? would you still be so sweet to me, or do you only excuse the males?that is, have you changed your attitude toward socio males simply because you fell in love with one?what was your original attitude towards them before your beloved socio?
Even your dog looks depressed, Erin. Whose life haven't you ruined in your direct vicinity? Poor puppy.
erin. i just find it so fascinating that you will not let a woman abuse you, but you excuse a man. you sound like many of the women from my generation, or even older.an old fashioned woman will always stand beside her man no matter what.if you come here to get stronger, would it not make more sense to abandon that way of thinking?
@ErinYou would RIP her a new oneRip Rip
your socio. he was a better friend? may i lend you my perspective of why you do this?
It's still a Rip moment
Erin, what about men that you aren't attracted to? would you let them treat you the way your socio did? @Rip... lol(my word verification was "meness")
Did anyone ever play silly six pins as a kid.
Rip must retreat to his cave till night.
It's actually erecting, not erectioning.FYIErectioning,The act of giving someone an erection
Erin, I have a very important question for you dear.
Why is this whole blog about Erin since I've been back?Vortex
Whoa is Erin a computer program.
@Erin.yeah i somehow figured you might say that. i'm thinking uber empath is just female sociopath, as we define them here. also, you and i have similar backgrounds i suspect but we diverged paths in our teens maybe. your mother sounds like an idiot by the way (sorry to call your mother an idiot).well paperwork time. i will be back later.
it is my believe that because you have no sexual desire for women, you are quick to judge their treatment of you.it's amazing to me that there is never enough anger behind your words, when you speak of your socio. when the subject of abusive women comes up, you have a rather adolescent reaction.possibly this is the child's rebellious voice, you are still using to address your mother.when you feel attraction for the male socio, you no longer use this angry child to fight back.you give him leave to destroy you, because you let your sexual desires consume you.it is my belief that you are the kind of woman other, stronger women despise because you build your life around a hopeless tragedy. the tragic romances of a fictional world.if you were on the outside looking in, would you respect such a woman? a woman who will not see just how angry she should be over how she was treated, and keeps allowing it to go on?
When in doubt, Erin, just ask:"What would Wonder Woman do?"Works for me.
I find myself pissed off and slightly disgusted at the dude I just broke up with.
He thought he could snare me with his magnificent tantric fishing pole and neo-Fabio looks.I think he is a bit surprised that it didn't work.
Erin is IN the computer.It's genius
Are you sure you're ready for this, Erin?
Don't you really mean: I care to listen as long as I can turn it into something about ME!
He had to ask me what "cinematic" and "precocious" and one other common word meant.He is all into the native side of his heritage, that is what his entire life is about as well as how he makes a living, but didn't even know the name of his grandfather's tribe's language when my housemate handed him a dictionary for it (her fiance also has half a side from the same tribe, the one tribe that the white man couldn't conquer).He was all "Huh, what's this?"And the white lady had to explain it do him.
Half the time he looked like a little boy who never grew up, and the other half of the time he looked like a daemon.I liked that about him, but points to a disconnect.
He writes without contractions, ever, just like the previous quasi-socio.In fact, when I first met him, he requested my facebook friendship, and then immediately deleted his whole wall. Except for a couple of tagged photos of him, one in which he is standing next to my quasi-socio ex.Turned out he doesn't know the guy, but it was still... cosmically weird.
Yes Erin I am a turd. You have no idea just how much of one I am. I know a secret about your lovely anon, that you can't seem to figure out on your own, because you love the lie so much.I keep thinking I might just go ahead and tell you, but where is the fun in that?I'm sure there are people here who have already figured him out. They are also keeping this secret from you. I don't need your friendship. Weak women like you disgust me. I would crush you like an insect if you got near me!
Ok, Erin. Here goes.
He wasn't needy, except at certain moments. One time he thought I was sneaking out in the morning before he got up (I was just getting something out of my bag) and he freaked out and got all paranoid.I wouldn't call him weak, either, but I feel a lot of his strength was faked or self-convincing.I got rid of him because he wasn't treating me the way that Wonder Woman should be treated.It was all ME ME ME ME
Lol @ TNP
My feel is that you lost respect for him somehow.Was that true?WOW this is so eye-opening, I have no idea how you figured this profound observation out. I would have never known that this might have been the case.
@ErinOh fuck it! I'll just tell you then... keeping it a secret wouldn't give me any satisfaction.I am your beloved Anon Erin. I am the silky smooth voice, and the angel voice. I mean, I really thought you would see just how very FAKE I was being. I was so over the top!You have been talking to me this whole time!Isn't that a hoot?!!! Must go now... see yous guys later!!
Wait for it...
Hey Erin, did you notice the URL of this blog?
Does "sociopath" translate as "care bear" in Erinese?
@MedusaHey. Do you hate me to?
I don't bother to hate anyone. That's energy I could be using for other things. I liked you better before you started attempting to play games for which you have no natural skill, though, when you were more earnest in your desire to learn.
Why abbreviate "asshole"?
Holy crap if Christ were alive (ever?) today he'd be disgusted with what his teachings have been bastardized into. STFU!
I just don't see the point. Do swear words (if you can call it that) bother you?
Mine field? How does that pertain to my question?
For fuck's sake, someone talk about ME and my issues. Where the hell is Soulful.
Scroll up, Erin.
What's up Medusa? How's the roommate situation?
Erin, did you just out yourself as Jason? Or is it just that everything is about YOU?
Haven, she's still annoying. Interrupted me like 3 times while I've been posting. Doesn't understand what a closed door to my office means. Her latest 'idea' is to open a 'red tent' for women on thier periods. Massages, hair washing, stones on the abdomen while John Hughes movies play in the background. My idea of a nightmare.
Why don't you answer TNP's question? I think it's a good one, and if you are able to answer it honestly, it may open your eyes and make you feel better about yourself.
Games? I asked a pretty straight forward question with a link to a small questionnaire.
Egads Medusa. Maybe the hot stones idea isn't bad. Tell her to lie down and see how many you can stack on her ::wink:: for optimal results. Yanno, for science.
@medusaOk about your issues. I want to make you feel better:)talk.
I already did. The moment has passed.
Dammit. Sometimes embedded links cause the spam filter to flag a comment. I don't have the URL for the site anymore, so I guess you'll have to manually refresh SW between the 3:57 and 4:13 until it pops back up when ME fixes his spam box. ME usually does that pretty quick.
It's true, we've had issues with the spam filter for quite a while now. Usually happens with long comments or comments with links in them.This is why Zwang often breaks up his novels into several novellas.
Medusa, do you mind emailing me your answer to my question? I know you're a little more private than Erin. If not, it's ok.
What the fuck is your problem, Erin? I don't need your fucking attitude. I asked a question, the spam filter scanned the blog and eventually flagged it, and it will be back within the hour. Chill the fuck out. I can't magic it back myself and I don't have the link anymore. So just wait. Jeesh.
Alright. Just remember to refresh your browser between those spots. It IS the weekend, so ME might take longer than usual, you never know. Just stay vigilant. Thanks.
erin said...@AnonThat was very brave to share that level of honesty on here. I feel very honored and special that you would share that with me.July 30, 2011 12:57 PMuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh.....July 30, 2011 1:01 PM*smashes face out back of head with cataclysmic face palm*July 30, 2011 1:04 PMthe first female to enter the never zone of extreme faggyness. that shit's official.July 30, 2011 1:09 PM
Erin said...I think that is a compliment in some weird way--right?July 30, 2011 1:25 PMwrong.July 30, 2011 1:26 PM
Well the posts today are rather amusing.
TNP: check your inbox.
TheNewYou said...Have you ever loved somebody so muchThat you can barely breath when you're with 'emThen you suffocate to death.July 30, 2011 2:10 PM Erin said...TheNewYouOh dearI am cryingThat is so profoundThank you!July 30, 2011 2:11 PM
Kesu said...It is a fucking Eminem lyric July 30, 2011 2:14 PM Erin said...You are ruining the moment July 30, 2011 2:16 PM
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