Saturday, December 11, 2010

Criminally sociopathic (part 2)

Cont.:
I ended up selling meth for a few years after all this. Amusingly the reason was I wanted to meet more people who were willing to commit real crimes like robbing armored cars or finding someone who would pay me to kill people and it's not like you can post wanted ads so I figured the easiest way to meet new criminals who weren't a bunch of stupid kids was to start selling drugs. I had been nonplussed by the kids I met in community service. Most of them were there for vandalism charges and none of them showed any real initiative.

So my criminal career after that mostly consisted of me selling meth starting from $20 sacks on the street to pushing pounds for a Mexican cartel family to cooking it myself interspersed with things like armed robbery of other dealers who had disrespected me (great excuse to go take what you want from someone and have some fun).

If you go to the court house and look at my record I have literally pages of charges that have been brought against me and a total of two convictions, one felony possession of meth and one misdemeanor 'being under the influence.' One of your posts mentioned this phenomenon. We might commit the crimes but compared to the poor saps who aren't sociopaths we don't do the time - we get off too often and leave early more often than not.

My first arrest on drug charges was stupid. I didn't know my rights well enough (though amusingly I'd taken a criminal law class at the local community college since my momma always said, "you have to know the rules so you can break them right"). After that first arrest I was on probation which meant I no longer had those protective rights that coulda saved me the first time which meant luck eventually got me a couple more arrests and on the last one the DA had actually realized I was someone he should pay attention to.

So I left it all behind (leaving a certain minor cartel family with thousands of dollars in unpaid debt that I didn't feel like dealing with). I had decided that I had a problem. I didn't have the drug problem I played to everyone else to excuse my behavior - I had a legal problem. Doing the work I had been doing with search and seizure terms is illogical. It's not a winning game so I figured I'd drop it for 3 years and come back when I had my rights back armed with the knowledge I'd picked up on how to work the legal system. My one close friend (the same one I got in trouble with when I was 16) moved back to town and told me to get my shit together and actually really did a lot of work toward re-socializing me. She also helped me decided not to go right back to work when my probation fell off (since of course, I had been a model of good behavior).

So here I am. In the last couple quarters of a 4 year degree in an extremely technical engineering major. And I feel dead. Because nothing else carries any feeling with it. It isn't that I can't avoid getting locked up or that I can't make money legally it's that when I weigh the price of risking prison against the price of living out a life of dead affect and absolute boredom the choice doesn't seem difficult. Survival isn't worth anything when you aren't doing anything with it. If I'm a criminal it's only because some things I enjoy are illegal and I don't particularly fear the consequences.

273 comments:

  1. Brilliant. Let's get fucking married, author of post. I am so, so serious. Let's commit this shit together.

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  2. Survival isn't worth anything when you aren't doing anything with it.

    Well said. I commented on as much on yesterday's post.

    You've had a good run for a few years in college, and had a pretty colorful past. Now you want to choose which one is next, but you've already made that decision. You're just biding your time.

    There are ways to eliminate the boredom in a legal fashion, and there are ways to eliminate the boredom in a less than legal fashion, but not one crushed in the eyes of the law. If you must do something criminal, try and stay off the radar of law enforcement was BS like bank robberies or holding up liquor stores.

    You just invested four years of your life in a piece of paper. I went through it too years ago. You can use it as toilet paper and piss your life away, or you can be creative. It's up to you.

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  3. You may as well finish the course if you've already taken it that far but, if your regular day to day life is lacking the excitement that you crave, then it's time to create a second one.

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  4. LOL who would be dumb enough to kill someone for money.That's going in the deep deep end.Not saying it's wrong fuck the person who is getting killed but it's way to risky and in shit like that there's no way you can "Do it right" because murder can always go very wrong.

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  5. As a sociopath i still think it's wrong to murder someone.I can't reach a deeper level of anger at murderers because i have a shallow makeup but murdering someone who never did anything to you is incredibly stupid it doesn't even make you ruthless people like that are a dime a dozen these days.

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  6. "LOL who would be dumb enough to kill someone for money."

    What better reason is there, Anon? Seriously, I'm asking.

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  7. GRK murder is not the worst thing you can do to a person. Framiing a person of a sex crime is the worst thing you can do.

    Those sociopath women who say "He raped me!" or those informants who lie and try to make you out to be a drug dealer and get you locked up for years. That is ruthless because the individual has to live with a reputation they dont deserve and didnt earn.

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  8. Revenge is a good enough reason to kill someone. If someone really ticked me off, I don't think that It would be unreasonable for me to kill them, I've come close once before. To be honest though, I'd take killing a random person for a nice wad of cash, over killing someone that I don't lke, anyday. I guess murder is always a risk. You never know what evidence you might leave behind, what could be used against you. But If your willing to take that risk, you may as well get paid for it.

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  9. A criminal with a tech degree or a criminal without one. Which sounds better? Which one has more options and which one will have more opportunities? If the criminal life doesn't work out there is a plan..it's very simple. Get your degree then do whatever you want but don't throw away something just because you see no value in it now. If it ever comes down to you against the world..the world will win..your degree will win. You will never be stuck in something you can't get out of..unless you're in jail or dead. It's best to have those options set up for yourself especially if you're young. Who knows how you will feel in 10 years. Imagine.

    I guess I see it this way because I'm older and I know how horrible life can be without options.

    I'm greateful things are different for me now but I sure did pay the price for that stupidity.

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  10. Misanthrope but would you frame someone of a sex crime for a wad of cash? You could easily get paid by the feds if you find sex offenders and if it's something like possession of child pornography it's very easy to frame someone for possession.

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  11. I'd do just about anything as long as the price is right, Savagelight. Are you talking about working as a bounty hunter? I've never really thought about making money out of framing people before, but I gues it is pretty easy. I had another studant removed from my college by planting weed in his locker, a few months ago.

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  12. I have a hard time planning ahead so it's difficult for me to mastermind schemes.I think the more psychopathic you are the less impulse control you have over yourself.Personally ive always thought narcissists were more scheming than psychopaths they are gossipers.In a job it's hard to spot a narcissist because they have a conscience but over time you will spot a psychopath.They are not as stable minded as they'd like to think remember this is a kid who took pleasure from torturing animals of course there will be red flags.

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  13. I find it hard to hold down a job and to keep friends.I'm socially skilled and its easy for me to make friends with people but im hypersensitive to sleights and im incredibly hot-headed and can fly into a rage over something small.I was in the gym with a friend once and he said something that pissed me off.I think i might have even took it the wrong way.I was pacing up and down the gym(You could easily see i was irritated) then my friend said "Are you feeling alright"? in a condescending way.So i flipped before that i was waiting for him to say something,i picked up a weight and beat him over the head with it.He was bleeding heavily but i kept kicking him in the face and stomping on his head.I still see him sometimes when im out and about.Last week he was with his girlfriend across the road and i looked over and he caught my eyr then he moved his head away fast.He was terrified to look over lol.

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  14. What are you guys like when you drink? Last time i was out a foreigner asked me for change so i punched him in the face a few times but there was police behind me one tried to pull me to the floor but i kicked his leg at the right time and he folded but i got gored from behind and they squashed my head into the ground.I spend the whole night kicking the cell door telling those fuckers to let me out.

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  15. The best time though was after a night out.I split up with my friends to go on a stroll and i walked into a supermarket.There was two girls at the cash register with their boyfriends.I was looking for trouble so i walked up to the fat guy and start hurling abuse at him he pushed me so i picked him up and threw him into an apple stand then i punched his friend.But the fat one got up and tackled me from behind then the two of them start standing on my head while i was laughing at them.Then the police came and submitted them then put them in the car.I told the police that i was walking through the shop when they attacked me and they believed it.The two girlfriends were pleading with the cops saying i was a liar but i was too convincing at playing the victim.When the cop turned his head i was smirking at the two of them.Anyways in the end i took an apple from the ground and walked off with just a few scratches.

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  16. Breaking news... Madoff's son hangs himself. Madoff was a very highly accomplished con artist from Wall Street. Clearly no empathy, no conscientiousness. The question is does it hurt him that his son hanged himself? Does he sleep well?

    ....a son of Bernard Madoff has been found dead in New York City of an apparent suicide.

    The official said Mark Madoff was found hanged in his Manhattan apartment. A family member notified police around 7:30 a.m. Saturday.

    The official spoke to the AP on the condition of anonymity because he wasn't allowed to speak publicly about the case.

    Mark Madoff and his brother, Andrew, were under investigation but hadn't faced any criminal charges in the massive Ponzi scheme that led to their father's jailing.

    Bernard Madoff swindled a long list of investors out of billions of dollars and is serving a 150-year prison term.

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  17. @GRK
    "Last week he was with his girlfriend across the road and i looked over and he caught my eyr then he moved his head away fast.He was terrified to look over lol."

    Does it feel good to know a grown man is afraid to look at you?

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  18. @Misanthrope Wow you are one scary mofo. You know there is nothing worse you can do to a person than make them look like a sex offender. They go to prison and get ass raped. They get released and society labels them a sex offender.

    In a way if you killed them it might be considered more merciful.

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  19. @17 lets see who else decided to murder themselves this way.

    Deborah Palfrey Deborah Jeane Palfrey

    When someone is snitching, it's common for them to feel guilty and to they decide to hang themselves.

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  20. A sad story. Were you a client?

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  21. @SavageLight Yea it does atleast he wont run his mouth and say dumb things to me anymore.He can say it to his other friends but she shouldn't have said it to me.

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  22. I have been kicked out of my house and im living with my grandmother now.Her family don't know that im bullying her.I told her if she throws me out ill come back with people and set fire to her house.I have her questioning her own sanity i tell her every day that she has an inferiority complex and she needs to see a psychologist LOL.She talks back sometimes though i would seriously love to punch her face in but that would cause too much distress.What pisses me off the most is when she compares me to people who i deem as lowlifes.

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  23. C'mon guys i wanna hear some of YOUR stories.What made you come to the conclusion you were a psychopath?

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  24. I seem to be alot more violent than the majority of the posters here.

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  25. leave your grandmother alone GRK.

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  26. @GRK if you mistreat your grandmother you can forget about being included in her will.

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  27. I feel dead.

    I understand this feeling, all too well. Which is why I say fuck it, you may as well go for it.

    when I weigh the price of risking prison against the price of living out a life of dead affect and absolute boredom the choice doesn't seem difficult.

    Ok then. I agree with Grace though. If you’re already close to the finish line anyway, you may as well go ahead and get your degree. After that, to hell with it. Do your thing, watch yourself and have fun while it lasts.

    Survival isn't worth anything when you aren't doing anything with it.

    Exactly.

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  28. Your use of language suggests you're not as retarded as the actions you describe. Is this you fantasizing GRK?

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  29. GRK, explain to us why you don't see that you are a low life.

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  30. @SavageLight Yeah i though of that but it's hard to hold back on the torment and my actions aren't that retarded i am still here ain't i?

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  31. I agree though alot of people have been killed for half of the shit i have done in the past.

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  32. Whats the family background GRK?

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  33. Though I can see that not everybody will be able to understand what this guy has written to you, M.E., I do believe it'll find resonance with a lot of people.

    I do hope you are very protective of the identities of those who write you, because - as we know - 'they' don't need proof to get someone incarcerated if they really want to do so!


    Guys, what he writes ... it is not about whether or not killing is right, you've lost the point here!

    Besides, who can claim to think smart when you were a kid, or when you were a youngster without any decent guidance or access to resources that might assist you in forming good life strategies?!

    And he's right: Most of those who both have the psychoipathic traits and who have been convicted for one or more crimes, have done WAY more than what anyone who isn't/haven't walked this walk themselves would expect possible for any individual.

    I know such people myself, which is probably why I never stoop to simpleminded categorizing others for whichever situation they've been in.

    Exceptions are when someone gets in jail over and over and for the same kinds of crimes. But they often have mental issues (illness), and who are we to talk about how it influences them when we haven't experienced it ourselves.

    I may have certain traits of character, but I can't abide narrow minded and over-simplified thinking.

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  34. that was incredibly hot. :)

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  35. Nothing is easy for anyone here who are genuine, thats why the questions, answers and views should not stop.

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  36. "Survival isn't worth anything when you aren't doing anything with it.

    Exactly."

    Well said.


    GRK,

    I think most people are a little more careful about what they say online, as it can be traced if need be.

    But even more than that I think you may have had a point when you said a few articles back that most of those who comment here aren't psychopaths.

    Other than that, psychopaths come in a number of varieties. You seem to have a pretty good understanding of the traits in yourself that fit the definition of psychopathy, and that may be the one thing that'll eventually give you a chance to do something about the things that give you problems (thinking of your lack of impulse control).

    I can't say much about myself in relation to being a psychopath, I'm not a psychopath. But I have a blog where I write a few things about how I see things tongue-in-cheek from a psychpath's point of view. You will find that much of what defines me is exactly what some would call psychopathic.


    Grace,

    are you going anti-social on us here?

    You have some very good points!... ;)

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  37. I love to pretend that i have a shitty life and feel pity for myself and it's even better if you convince somebody else that you have a shitty life and make them feel pity for you and when they want to help or try to express that pity say "No, it's ok, i'll try to manage". Man i love that.

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  38. Terrorizing grannies and beating up a fat people in a grocery store? Thanks for sharing how hardcore you are.

    @Misanthrope: I personally think that killing someone because you're angry at them is a sign of weakness. Not that it makes you weak, but the fact that you apparently felt obliged to do so. The one time I tried it, I wasn't in control. Money on the other hand, money buys all. Why not murder? Why not framing people? A dollar is a dollar, and how you get it is up to you.

    @Reader: Even though I think you should get your degree, I do wonder what sort of application it is going to have in your life. Maybe you should try and get a job in that field, just to see what it's like, you know? Three to six months, and see if that piece of paper was really worth anything more than boosting your CV.

    Work can sometimes be more engaging than school was for certain fields. Yours might be one of them.

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  39. Nothing scientific, but from my experiences thats how narcissistic behavior operates. For most busy folks, Life has no value if doesn't make any noise.

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  40. "The one time I tried it, I wasn't in control."

    Yeah, same here. I wasn't even trying to kill the guy though, I just lost it completely, and beat him within an inch of his life. I'd like to think that if I ever did end up killing someone out of anger, that it would be a cool and calculated murder. A "perfect murder". As they say "Revenge is a dish best served cold", But to be honest, it would probably just be one moment of rage followed by a lifetime in prison.

    This is why I want to learn how to control my rage, and unleash at the appropriate time. Anger management sure as shit ain't gonna help me do this though. I employ agression even when I'm NOT provoked, so what hope do have of ever reaching my goal?

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  41. GRK, I don't care about you bullying your granny. You're a unsophisticated fool going for shock value. I'm not shocked. You have been on here trying to get people to list their crimes and get into specifics that would risk the commentor, but anyone smart enough to do something that would warrant that type of attention can read right through what you are trying to do. At first I thought it was funny that your playing games, but now you are bordering on being a informant. If you were such a 'criminal' then you would know at least some art in conversation where you arent putting everything out there on the street. You think because you hang up your panties out there we will put our dirty laundry out there too. Not going to happen you fucking grass.
    Your living with your grandma? What a idiot. The only people you can manipulate are elderly family members and even that you have to use brute force. You are a dope fiend and a loser. Your pathetic rants about being the biggest psychopath are laughable. You are like the kid that talk to fucking much about how tough he is. Your the type that pushes things and talks loud, but when you see death your crying like a bitch begging for your life.
    This article reminds me of you

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  42. I thought I just read a comment that Ukan made and now it's not here. Am I wrong?

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  43. No, your not. No "Comment deleted by author" thing though. wierd.

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  44. Original Poster: I'm on my way to way you are now, believe me you aren't missing out. You probably forgot that even this is boring. After you get your business flowing all the fun goes away. You have to almost create trouble for yourself. I'm personally over the game. Like you I have found my way out of a lot of convictions, even the one they got me on I got amnesty in the end. My record is clean. I had firearms charges, explosives, possession of firearms with intent to sale, conspiracy, murder, attempted arson, and conspiracy. All of them I have gotten dispositioned innocent in the end. I have had to do time don't get me wrong, but because of a recent conflict in my country and a cease fire I was eventually let free as part of a larger deal. I haven't been back since.
    In prison I learned that caring didn't matter. I learned that people didn't matter. I was young the first time I went into a youth camp. I couldn't stay out. I wasn't addicted to any drugs, I was addicted to adrenaline. In there I watched how a few strong willed people can control a entire prison, even the guards, with no weapons at all. I learned how much people were fucking sheep. Walking in the line people tell them to. I learned that idealism was for followers, and that pragmatism was for leaders. I learned how leaders used peoples idealism to get them to do their dirty work.
    When I finally got it and learned what I needed to I got out and stayed out. I went into doing things for myself instead of for ideals. I learned that I didnt need a good excuse to do crazy shit. I can do it on my own and make money. Here I am. Hopefully I can make it to that 4 year degree, but I just got the idea the other day so I am at start. Four year seems like a long time to stay out.

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  45. Hey my comment was deleted

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  46. I think all the sociopaths should get together and form an event the same way the borderlines and the narcissists do and see what happens.

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  47. Good thing I backed it up:

    I don't care about you bullying your granny. You're a unsophisticated fool going for shock value. I'm not shocked. You have been on here trying to get people to list their crimes and get into specifics that would risk the commentor, but anyone smart enough to do something that would warrant that type of attention can read right through what you are trying to do. At first I thought it was funny that your playing games, but now you are bordering on being a informant. If you were such a 'criminal' then you would know at least some art in conversation where you arent putting everything out there on the street. You think because you hang up your panties out there we will put our dirty laundry out there too. Not going to happen you fucking grass.
    Your living with your grandma? What a idiot. The only people you can manipulate are elderly family members and even that you have to use brute force. You are a dope fiend and a loser. Your pathetic rants about being the biggest psychopath are laughable. You are like the kid that talk to fucking much about how tough he is. Your the type that pushes things and talks loud, but when you see death your crying like a bitch begging for your life.
    This article reminds me of you

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  48. Ukan, your comment will reappear later today or tomorrow, by which time, no one will care.

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  49. Maybe the blog has reached critical mass.~

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  50. Would still like to know your family backgrounds and childhoods

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  51. why, gagreflex? (i'm not challenging, just curious.)

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  52. GRK, I dont care about you bullying your granny. You're a unsophisticated fool going for shock value. I'm not shocked. You have been on here trying to get people to list their crimes and get into specifics that would risk the commentor, but anyone smart enough to do something that would warrant that type of attention can read right through what you are trying to do. At first I thought it was funny that you were playing stupid people, but now you are bordering being a informant. If you were such a 'criminal' then you would know at least some art in conversation to where you arent putting everything out there on the street. You think because you are hanging your panties up people are going to put all their dirty laundry out there too. Not going to happen you fucking grass.
    Your living with your grandma? What a idiot. The only people you can manipulate are elderly family members. Pathetic, they trust everyone. Wow what a smart devious sociopath you are. Even with that you have to use brute force, its laughable. You are a dop fiend and a loser. Your pathetic rants about being the biggest psychopath are ridiculous. You are that kid that talks to fucking much, but when faced with death you are crying like a bitch begging for your life.
    This article reminds me of you

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  53. Exactly that, just curious, not challenging.

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  54. I was adopted by my grandparents at birth.My biological mother was a prostitute and my dad is a petty criminal.My grandparents always spoiled me rotten but from an early age i found ways to manipulate them.Ive known alot of manipulative people but none come near myself.I had to do it to surive.My grandparents are both narcissists and put me in the best clothes and told me i was better than all the other kids from an early age and they are both extremely manipulative so i had to learn these techniques to survive in that shark tank.Come to think of it my upbringing is almost identical to Ted bundys.

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  55. Haha UKAN i was laughing at that story myself what a tool.But yea you can say all the shit you want to the sychopanths on this site who kiss your ass but i still have youth on my side im very young and i guarantee by the time im 30 i will be in a better position than anyone on this site.I honestly don't know how you all stay here i find it difficult to share attention with people.

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  56. Ha ha, you are like Not Able: "I know you are but what am I?". Wheres all your manipulation and strategy now you chump.

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  57. I don't think age automatically qualifies anyone of being above retribution for whatever reason.
    What was school like for you?

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  58. You can say all the shit you want UKAN but the sad truth is.If you said it to my face id make you eat those words i don't fuck around like that.

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  59. I love being admired but i despise intimacy.

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  60. You couldnt even get near enough to me for me to even notice you made any attempt at it, kid. Your common. Stop thinking your special. Threatning people on the interenet is pussy shit. We call people like you in the hole "cell soldiers". Its for people who talk shit through the cell door in the security housing unit where people cant get at them. It's considered weakness.I can't get at you and you can't get at me. So all the threats you throw out there just make you look like a coward. Only pathetic scared bitches make threats behind computers.

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  61. I don't sit down and plan out manipulation.I'm naturally like that i usually flatter people at the start.

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  62. I don't know why this site is so female friendly every sociopath ive known can't stand woman and im no exception.

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  63. Don't be destracted by other people's agenda here. Say what you wanna say maybe you'll find something, maybe not. Maybe there's a pecking order here but I guess you don't see it. Neither do I.

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  64. Every sociopath I know charms women. Maybe you were looking for the serial killer wanna be site.

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  65. LOL UKan you come on here every day to tell your little ball licker followers how bad ass you are.You are a low life.My dad owns real estate and my is a plastic surgeon.

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  66. Gag people like GRK get trashed on because hes full of shit, is insecure, needs approval from others, and is generally annoying. He is the same as every weekly anonymous poster who comes in yelling about how hes the biggest sociopath and everyone else is full of shit. If you go for what he says then you are a tool. Join his grandma in the dumb department.

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  67. Were you "diagnosed?" or just tried to figure it all out by yourself?

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  68. ukan, which of the ukan's is actually you and which are anons-pretending-to-be-ukans?

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  69. You say im insecure? Every sociopath is insecure.Scared people do scary things.

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  70. UKan can't accept that i am 10x more psychopathic than he is.Atleast i actually had behavior of the macdonald triad.You low life drug dealer your a dime a dozen.

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  71. UKan i can picture you in the club now with the popped collar and your little beady.What does UKan do when he sells a bag of coke? Goes on his website and tells everyone how bad-ass he is.LOL

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  72. "My biological mother was a prostitute and my dad is a petty criminal"

    ??

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  73. Right, you're so stupid you contradicted yourself in a matter of minutes. Your dad was a petty criminal and your mom was a prostitute. Now you are making fantasies about him being a real estate mogul and her being a plastic surgeon. Maybe you lie to yourself so much because the truth hurts to bad to think about. Maybe your searching for a outlet for your pain but you are scared of the risks if you go all the way. Maybe you seek approval from others, because you never got that approval from your parents. How did it feel to know your dad threw you away like fucking garbage? How does it feel knowing your mom is a fucking whore getting fucked by sweaty perverts?
    I know why you have issues with women and intimacy. You never had any. You didn't have a real mother. You were powerless to everything around you. Now that you are getting older you are taking it out on your grandma. You are thinking now you are powerful, you are wrong. Confidence is different from arrogance in that one is earned, and the other is you lieing to yourself. You will be manipulated through your weaknesses and unless you know them you will always be open for attack.

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  74. ROFL UKan tell me one psychopath who didn't have a fucked up childhood? Your an idiot.

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  75. I don't seek aproval from anyone i get it from within.I get it from not being a people pleaser.

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  76. Don't lie just to man up to the pressure. Develop your points in your own way. This is not high school and you're not being judged.

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  77. Your actions speak for themselves. Everytime you comment to me I know more about you. You are fighting a losing battle because you came in here exposing your weaknesses. You can't tell what you are doing most of the time. You are trying to convince everyone that you are special. It is a trait of someone who was negelected that they seek the approval of others to feel special. It has nothing to do with people pleasing. It has to do with insecurity and fear.

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  78. ROFL And your upbringing was swell.

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  79. What im saying is kids who had fucked up usually become two things - Borderlines or sociopaths.The borderline has alot of empathy for people and the sociopaths emotions are blunted.

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  80. UKan Is that what you would tell every serial killer? You were looking for acceptance.

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  81. I'd still rather like to hear it as it is from you GRK. i.e. if you can find it in you not to get drawn into a ridiculous proof of self thing in this,... "virtual reality."

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  82. No. I struggled and became strong from it. Your past has destroyed you. You are broken. You have to overcome your insecurities, conquer your fears, and that takes you understanding that you have been lying to yourself. When you lie about yourself to seem greater than what you are you give those weaknesses away. When you lie to yourself about your past so much that you let obvious lies out like what you did it showed me that you believe your own bullshit most of the time. The times that you do face the truth it hurts too much to think about so you go back to lying to yourself. You believe them so much that when you talk to people you pathologically lie.

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  83. i don't think grk is even a socio. i think he's someone who was hurt and now is trying to be big and bad. if he can scare a bunch of socios off, he must be truly frightening.

    but it won't happen here. go deal with the hurt instead.

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  84. You can take it or leave it but when a sociopath comes across you he will see exactly what I do and he will use you. If you don't face your past it will continue to conquer you and control your actions. You will continue to be powerless, because you have fooled yourself into thinking you are powerful.

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  85. Ahaha i don't care.The truth is dreary and boring as long as someone will see me in a good lie ill tell them mass.

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  86. Yeah i'm not a sociopath i match every trait but i am not a sociopath.

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  87. I'm staying with the man i know best right now and that's me.

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  88. You came in here thinking I have a bunch of dumb followers on here kissing my ass, you are mistaken. They listen to me, because people like you come in here full of shit and I expose you. I'm their entertainment not leader. You walked into the game like countless others every week. Your dialogue with me is a internet Candid Camera. Now you can stick around and watch it happen to someone else or you can leave embarrassed. Your choice.

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  89. LOL your wasting your time.I'm shameless i don't know what it's like to feel shame.I never met a sociopath who takes the internet as serious as you do.

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  90. The drug dealer versus the guy who smacks around his Grandma. We should grab the hitman, the pimp, and the serial killer, and we can get together for the Family Portrait.

    What's it matter to either of you who has the biggest criminal balls?

    Maybe I'd take you a little more serious if you weren't such a fatalist. You know what you have to do to get out of the game and stay out of prison, but you're too lazy to grease the gears and get set up shop with something that seems legit. If you think conducting business in the corporate world can't be fun, cutthroat and exciting, you haven't been paying attention to the news for the last thirty years.

    Get dirt on the right people, weasel your way in, and only leave when it's time for you to make the decision to go. Spending four years working on a piece of paper when you have the available capital and influence now seems like a horrendous waste of time.

    A person like you within a corporation, especially near the top, would be invaluable in some markets. You're wasting your time slinging drugs and dropping ranch sauce on card dealers. You could easily become the chief of security or something along those lines. Corporate sabotage and assassination isn't nearly as rare as you'd think. It takes a few skilled people without a conscience to successfully utilize these avenues. And while you're playing the go-to crook, you can be collecting enough blackmail on your associates to have a strangle-hold on them until they've reached the grave, and possibly beyond.

    Just something to consider.

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  91. Could please someone tell me what a socio dad would feel (not sure if the proper word, of course) in a situation like this?

    Bernie Madoff's son found dead Mark Madoff's body removed
    An autopsy will be conducted to determine the exact cause of death.
    Madoff's death occurred on the second anniversary of his father's arrest.
    "Mark Madoff took his own life today," Madoff's attorney Martin Flumenbaum said in a statement. "This is a terrible and unnecessary tragedy. Mark was an innocent victim of his father's monstrous crime who succumbed to two years of unrelenting pressure from false accusations and innuendo. We are all deeply saddened by this shocking turn of events."

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  92. I don't know id probably be like "Fuck em"

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  93. Ted bundy pwns you all.

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  94. You said you're still young so if you're lucky maybe you'll find out soon enough that "winning" is only relative. One thing that haven't changed much, women still decides on what makes a man. This days its "Fake it till you make it". Now what does that say about about relationships?

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  95. It depends. When I saw that, my first thought was that it was a murder present, gift-wrapped for Mr. Madoff and special delivered through the news. Both symbolic and convenient for a suicide story. If you can't get to the man, you can at least get to his sons.

    My second thought it that his boy was a dirty rat that couldn't live with himself, and is a pathetic shit.

    Beyond that, I don't care to speculate.

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  96. Not Able shutup, you got played on this site too you fucking tool. We arent talking about who has the biggest balls we are talking about reality vs fantasy. I can't expect a person like you to understand what I was trying to show people because it's beyond your comprehension.

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  97. He would feel defeated. Sons are immortality and now its taken from him by his own mistakes.

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  98. No I just talk that way to stupid people. I have no respect for them.

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  99. "Sons are immortality"

    What do you mean by that?

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  100. What you guys think of this bundy video?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fqBAjwrgvhc

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  101. Well they would be carrying on his legacy.

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  102. It's what you don't say that makes me chuckle half the time. Your omission in itself is a tell.

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  103. I am an empath, a touch neurotic, a touch narcissist, definitely a loner but pretty much quite happy, trusting and loving people as best I can without much intimacy.

    Despite the fact that I see evidence of evil in people right and left I still have a very hard time giving up on people, even serial killers. I somehow see the child in people and my heart goes out to this child.

    I am so sorry for all of you out there who had it really tough growing up. I truly, deeply am sorry. I apologize on behalf of your parents, grandparents, and human kind. Someone has to apologize.

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  104. When you confront your fears and your past you are fixing a wall in your mental defences. You can talk openly about it and people can't use it against you, because it doesnt effect you anymore. When you speak people listen, because not hearing people bullshit themselves is a breat of fresh air.
    People gravitate towards confidence and are repelled by insecurity. The reason sociopaths are good at reading people and manipulating them is because we are not effected in the same way others are to painful things in our lives. We are not insecure, so we are able to use our confidence to manipulate your insecurities to the point where you are dependant upon us for your self worth.
    People pleasers are your workers. They enable you to continue to be lazy.
    People like GRK get used as crash dumbies. They are manipulated into thinking that if they cause a bunch of mayhem for someone they will become special. In reality you end up doing my time for me.
    If you don't wake up now you are going to remember every word of what I said. I want you to come back here and tell me about it when it happends.

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  106. There is method to some people's madness and there lies the ends...unless we're talking some kinda quasi morality preaching here. Throw in the need for sexual companionship and we instantly trade facts for a fuck.

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  107. Unless Google takes over the world and you are able to upload your brain (I'm crossing my fingers)you will eventually die. I don't want to waste all this shit I learned to have it go to dust. Plus, I did so much bad shit in my life that running for office is a non factor. A son allows me to be immortal. I can replicate myself in him. I come from a long line of sociopaths.

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  108. Thank you UKan, yes, that's what he must have felt, defeated. And, then angry? Depressed?

    Ukan, what does your name UKan stand for?

    Not Able, are you having a hard time deciphering a question?

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  110. Oh, I see what you mean now UKan. But what if your son turns out to be the most loving and careing individual imaginable. Are you going to beat and abuse him, just make double sure that he takes after you?

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  111. You need to take time to assess your strengths in weaknesses in a truthful and honest way to yourself. You need to know what they are. When you do that it enables you to work on them one at a time sytematically. Some will stay with you for a time. As they do use your lies to make that weakness look like your strength. Never boast about your strengths. It makes people avoid attacking you there and will have them looking for a weakness. Instead pretend and lie to be weak in that area so he is decieved and attack you on your strong point.
    It takes real strength to confront the shit in your past. Some people can't do it themselves so they go to therapists that manipulate them into confronting issues, like I just did but in a nicer fashion. Going to see a therapist is like going to the doctor or dentist. They will make you ten times stronger.

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  112. err..I lost you there Ukan. Was that a ruse?

    Misanthrope's scenario about fatherhood for Ukan is a page out of Russian history.

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  114. Sociopathy is genetic. I am convinced because my family has stories for generations of people breaking the law and controlling all the family members. My great grandma was supposedly a very lazy and oppressive woman. She chased me great grandpa with a butcher knife because he wouldnt give her the last of his spending money. My granpa was a soldier and a salesman. He manipulate people out of their businesses, blew all his cash, left his family and died alone and hated. My father was a control freak and abusive. My mother manipulated my father to do her dirty work. He only thought he was in control and she still is today. I'm trying to learn from all of these mistakes people are making and that I am making so that I become as strong as my potential allows me. I am focused on that goal. When I do that I will make my son even greater than I am. He will surpass me. Abuse is stupid peoples way of growing children. It's lazy. I'm only lazy when I dont care about something. My child would be my ultimate achievement. If he succeeds in life it is a testament to my greatness. I will have changed my families direction forever and generations.

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  115. I was the class clown.



    Children with ADHD are usualy class clowns.

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  117. It wasnt a ruse it was written so some people understand it and some people dont.

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  119. "If he succeeds in life it is a testament to my greatness."

    And if he fucks up?

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  120. UKan, you have a tool box and you want to pass it on to your child consciously, deliberately.

    Now, assume a socio dad had two children. Saw the smarts in the first born and brainwashed the first born to be very strong academically and pretty much pushed in every direction he wished he had as a child. Taught the child no conning but sheer idealistic strengths. The second born was a little narcissist, ready to live a parasitic style since birth and therefore intuitively learned all the socio things dad was doing. So, by the time these kids were mid40s and dad 70s the kid that was his best (first born) grew up to be someone who'd wanna kick a socio's ass and the other just like him. Now, which child makes the father immortal?

    ANd, Not Able, not asking.

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  121. @Ukan-make-Son
    Wouldn't your intensely "goal" focused outlook be irreconcilable with someone with exactly the opposite attributes as Misanthrope described?

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  124. you can't mold people. i hate that mindset. it sucks.

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  125. 125 just described "The Godfather" by Mario Puzo. Wouldn't it be surprising if Ukan turned out to be Italian/Sicilian.

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  126. They both do. Your childhood will ultimately determine how a person with your brain chemistry will function in the world. It will determine what you do with your power are lack there of. I'm not trying to raise sociopathic con artists. I'm trying to raise amazing people. That is not a trait that is solely sociopathic. Most sociopaths don't make it to be great. They don't leave a legacy.

    P.S. I dont like italians either

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  127. If i had children id put the fear of god in the fuckers so they don't dare answer back.Turn them into servants.It would be heaven i wouldn't have to drive to the grocery store again.

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  128. Childbirth is wasted on these dumb parents that have kids out of a mistake. It makes dumber children who are angry. They sit them in front of violent video games and angry flashing images and beat them and wonder why kids all over the place end up like GRK. If I was president the community would raise the child.

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  129. Ukan, so do you therefore agree that the best thing a parent can do is to recognise the innate nature of the child, rather than force them to be something they are not? - which happens a lot in reality.

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  130. I dont lift a finger already. I dont need children to do idle things. It would be cheaper to hire someone.

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  131. Yes notme that is exactly what I'm saying to the T

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  132. Hmmm, well put UKan, thank you. Time will show which kid dad fancies. These kids hate each other's guts and dad sees that. If he had to choose I wonder which he'd choose, the legend he wished to be like or the one who is a clear and close extension of himself that has not gotten far.

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  133. Im having them after my four year plan is complete. That way I have my family secure in that the police wont be able to take me away from them.

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  134. Anon

    i've seen people treat kids like dogs, and it's nothing but a reflection of who they are themselves. sickens me.

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  135. People take favorites because they see themselves in them. Most people don't have the capacity to understand children, and I know that sounds crazy because people underestimate them. I have raised kids on the street so I have experience in the worse kids. I never told them not to do wrong I told them how to do it right. Good leadership is about guidance. Not forcing someone to do something against their will.

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  137. I'll share this with you Ukan. The brilliant close friend whom I think is a socio, who reminds me very much of an older, slightly less dangerous version of you, said almost exactly the same thing about his first child with his first trophy wife. He would talk incessantly about his grand visions for her during his single parent phase. Unfortunately I guess she didn't work out as amazing as he'd hoped. I don't see her around anymore with his current family or hear him ever mention her.

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  138. GRK stick around. This site will help you if you let it, but you got to be upfront. I'm not the only on here with these eyes. Even the empathetic people on here have intuition. This will be a good outlet for you to be honest about yourself. You don't want to be Ted Bundy. He was a loser. His legacy is him being so insecure and broken that he was fucking dead corpses with their heads cut off. You may have such urges, but you need to find the root cause. You will destroy yourself otherwise. He was a manic depressant by the way, so you actually went to the wrong site. How fortitous.

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  139. Hmmm. Curious which one this dad will see himself in. His potential, or his past...


    Speaking of making money...
    see the medical fraud video here:
    http://money.cnn.com/2010/12/11/news/companies/mark_madoff_victims_lawsuits/index.htm?hpt=T2

    The guy is a bounty hunter, making 20% over the cases he points out to the US government. What cases? Dead doctors collecting money, men collecting pregnancy, women collecting prostate cancer...

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  140. GRK (btw, like how you keep changing your name)

    they beat up or shout at perfectly normal, energetic kids who have done nothing wrong, and justify it by claiming that kids need to know how to be put in their place. It shocks me, because they show no discretion whatsoever with regards to who the child is. They simply assume that all children are beligerant and mischievious and potential ticking bombs. It's actually not the case.

    That's partly what I meant when I said that you need to see each child as separate. You need good perception and generosity of mind to see where and when to draw lines. So many parents don't and have a one rule for all system.

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  142. Sociopaths relationships are not successful until they are aware of themselves. You really have to know all your little quirks or you will just be fucking people over on a constant basis and sabotaging yourself. It is really difficult to keep everything in line when you are aware of yourself, so imagine what it is to be sociopathic and oblivious? This is much the case.
    People blame sociopaths for these unsuccessful relationships in reality it is both of them. They both know nothing of themselves and are trying to make each other into somehting they are not. With sociopaths these types of relationship go bad in more extreme ways then empathetic peoples relationship. Sociopaths do everything to the extreme. Due to that severity people say to stay away from them. Really just like everyone else they are good relationship material if they know themselves and truly understand the other person.
    My girlfriend doesnt worry about me cheating. Control and manipulation are things I have to battle myself with in the relationship. However, I am honest with her and open that these are things I have to overcome and she is patient. I had such a dramatic effect on her when we first dated that she lost tons of weight and stopped eating. I couldnt figure what was wrong. I found out eventually that I had erroded her sense of moral and goodness and empathetic people need those things. I thought I was making her stronger but I was poisoning her mind. Since then I have been encouraging her to do good deeds, while I do all the dirt. This way we both fit into the roles we are supposed to not forcing the other to become something we are not.

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  143. In December 1987, Bundy was examined for seven hours by Dorothy Otnow Lewis, a professor from New York University Medical Center. Lewis diagnosed Bundy as a manic depressive whose crimes usually occurred during his depressive episodes.[119] To Lewis, Bundy described his childhood, especially his relationship with his maternal grandparents, Samuel and Eleanor Cowell. According to Bundy, Samuel Cowell was a deacon in his church. Along with the already established description of his grandfather as a tyrannical bully, Bundy described him as a bigot who hated blacks, Italians, Catholics and Jews. He further stated that his grandfather tortured animals, beating the family dog and swinging neighborhood cats by their tails. He also told Lewis how his grandfather kept a large collection of pornography in his greenhouse where, according to relatives, Bundy and a cousin would sneak to look at it for hours. Family members expressed skepticism over Louise's "Jack Worthington" story of Bundy's parentage and noted that Samuel Cowell once flew into a violent rage when the subject of the boy's father came up.[120] Bundy described his grandmother as a timid and obedient wife, who was sporadically taken to hospitals to undergo shock treatment for depression.[121] Toward the end of her life, Bundy said, she became agoraphobic.[122]

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  144. that sounds about right Ukan.

    i'm all for that.

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  146. Read the doctors opinion. Newspapers and unprofessionals throw around the term psychopath to mean every asshole boyfriend, serial kill, child molestor, and rapist. In reality these people can be any number of different pathologies.

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  148. hon, don't start a blog identity and ask those types of questions.

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  150. I don't think I'll ever have kids and if I do, I'm not sure that I would bother to stick around and raise them. It seems like a lot of hard work and waist of money, for someone who's just going to shit all over the place and then resent you for about 7 years. If did ever raise a child though, I would like to create them in my own image(so to speak). I think that the world could definitely do with a few more me's.

    "Good leadership is about guidance. Not forcing someone to do something against their will."

    I'm inclined to disagree with that. Isn't good leadership about reigning your own glory? About letting the people that you rule over know how great you are, and thats why you've reached a position of power, thats why your thier master? If/when I become a leader of men, I would feel as though it's the peoples duty to serve me, as there master.

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  152. I just wanted a picture of my gorgeous mush up here.

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  153. I cant teach you how to do crime. That's hands on and you have to grow up in it to be any good. Even then most everyone fails. You have to make a wall around you meaning you have to win support from every person around you and get them to do what you need so you stay in the backround. You need people with leadership, but not as strong as you so you can con them into looking like the leader when the police come you are still unknown. It's all about networking and making the right moves at the right time. If you slip up its game over and you don't usually get to many chances. If being a criminal is special to you I wouldnt suggest it. There are many sociopaths involved in crime and they will use you as part of their plan. They will use you and forget your name. I have done it. I justify it by saying they were broken anyway.

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  154. GRK most people are stupid and dont have a Phd. I go with peoples opinions that matter not the laymen on the street sitting on the couch watching dexter

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  157. I watched a movie about Bundy, and apparently his grandfather sexually abused his own daughter, who got pregnant, and gave birth to bundy.

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  158. the lack of details doesn't matter.

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  159. Amelia is a nigger.

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  160. sos ukan. such a nigger lol

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  161. Don't take him serious, BRK. He's projecting on you, not trying to help you. He doesn't give a shit about your endeavorers, why should he? If he did, he would have at least asked for a shred of context given your situation. You're just another pet project for him to mold into a little e-minion, just like he did with his previous failed experiment that still stalks this blog. That kid is worse off now than before he came here.

    You have the MacDonald Triad, have a violent past and present, and have a rap sheet. Going into dealing, directly, may not be the best route. That doesn't mean you can't be part of the game. You want to be around more people like you? Find one of the more "respectable" gangs in your area and be a hang-around if you think being a standalone will get you killed. If you decide it's not the scene for you, you'll leave it wiser, know a few more allies than what you had before, and know the game better. Just be wary about committing murder for anyone. It's the quickest way to a life of prison or the lethal injection. I'm not saying to Not do it, just be mindful of the context of the situation and how it can backfire on you if something goes south. Don't assume the worst, just plan for it.

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  162. GRK said...
    I want to you give me some tips on being a successful dealer UKan.


    Dumb Ass. Didn't we already establish that you ask too many stupid questions and people are suspicious of your intentions? Are you such a dick that you think you can butter up someone and play nice and it will all be forgotten or overlooked? Nobody is going to tell you anything incriminating you douche.

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  163. Find one of the more "respectable" gangs in your area and be a hang-around


    You know all about been a hang-around, and following along with others bullshit.
    As if your advice is any better than Ukans....lol

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  164. @TheNotablePath Your blog is excellent I like your straight forward way of explaining the pathology.From reading it I can tell that we are similar in thought although I probably have a little less of a conscience I could be wrong.

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  165. Excellent, GRK. Now go hang around on The Notable Path's blog and quit stinking up the air in here, you turd.

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  166. @TheNotablePath Your blog is excellent I like your straight forward way of explaining the pathology.From reading it I can tell that we are similar in thought although I probably have a little less of a conscience I could be wrong.


    And he will fall for it, hook,line and sinker.....lol

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  167. Notable, you cheerleaded that other kid into doing it too, (broken glass to the face) can't remember?
    Now your cheerleading this one.
    Cheerleading, manipulating it's the same thing.
    Your won't be the one with the concequences.
    Your in-consistancies are infuriating.

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  168. Not Able you are a idiot. I get some image of hamster running on a wheel when you speak. I'm showing you amazing things that you are too blind to see. Like how to crash dumbie people. You are so caught up in how things went down with that other kid you fail to see what I was trying to show you. I was showing you how I live, and how I do the things I do by giving you a example.

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  169. The Notable Path just wants to be the flavor of the day at anybody's ice cream stand. It doesn't matter who's. He and GRK Jerk-Off make a sweet couple.

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  170. so much attitude today.

    Let's all be fwends.

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  171. You say being inconsistent like it's a bad thing.

    Everything is based off context. I don't have a moral compass or a personality anchor.

    I find it amusing that UKan mimicked an old insult I threw at him to defend his image. Self-deprecation is unbecoming of you! Perhaps the subconscious stress of marriage and a 'straight' life is negatively affecting you. Don't worry, be happy, smoke some more of your primo weed and all your worries will melt away :)

    Notme, I'll check my attitude at the door for you, darlin'. I'll play nice, I swear!

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  172. Licky-Licky. Fucking sickening sweet ice cream vomit.

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  173. Let's all get stoned and be frwends with notme. She's so precious when she's stoned.

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  174. However you play is alright by me Notable.

    yes, anon, licky licky.

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  175. i knew you were lurking, you even beat me to it.

    yes, pwecious me is.

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  176. You been listening to any good tunes lately, aspie?

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  177. i don't know why anon is so angry. Actually, I don't know why anyone here gets angry when no one knows anyone. i think i got a little frazzled twice whilst i was here, but i don't hold a grudge. jeez.

    and i'm not stoned anon, but cheers, it's the way I am.

    Notable, aspie has been gone a while, I felt bad about making those jokes, hopes he knows they're just jokes.

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  178. Hey Medusa!

    lucky devil. i want some. :(

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  179. Sharing the stories seems to somehow create pissing contests. I don't get why it turns competitive. Is it a guy thing?

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  180. i assume so. a guy-socio thing.

    double whammy.

    Whatever it is it's moderately entertaining, up to a point.

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  181. It makes for long reading and when you're finished you haven't learned a damn thing except that the egos are large.

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  182. hehe so true. I especially like GRK, i like his kid photo and general GRK-ness, and the fact he can't decide on either a URL or a blogger account.

    I hope he returns. (no sarcasm here GRK, if you're reading)

    or perhaps i'm just that bored.

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  183. I wish they'd all use blogger accounts and stop impersonating each other.

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  184. Impersonation is the purest form of antagonisation.

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  185. yeah, that's not gonna happen.

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  186. it's 6.30 am here. i absolutely love the morning when everything's quiet. I feel like the world is all just mine. :)

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  187. Cheerleading and manipulating are two diffrent. things. One is a art the other is just ass kissing. Good call though.

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  188. From Nikita's post;
    Explains alot, if that were true about Ted Bundy's genealogy.

    I don't think GRK was looking for a hero but perhaps for clues in people with whom he might have shared similar root circumstances. Being condescending and dismissing the geneological factors unique to the individual and instead directing towards a premature analysis based on a completely different frame isn't intelligence but more like trying to establish a personal world view. Such directions only artificially narrows the possibility for those interested, to understand (hence avoid escalating?) something of a much wider scope. Who elected this blog as a "boot camp?" Who say's the only real disorder is the one that should put you on the chair? Save the nation-of-me spiel it for your own children.

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  189. This isn't a contest. I pick on people for a reason. Its to make them face reality.

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