Thursday, March 31, 2011

Getting better

Since last post I have been vaguely concerned about my state of hazy mental health when I happened upon a new game. It’s a seduction of sorts, not a classic one, more a winning the hearts and minds of the people type game. As I started thinking about the game (always tonguing that point on my canine tooth, like I do when considering something deliciously devious), I immediately started feeling better.

I started wondering whether the mental strain was not just a direct result of trying to be something I am not for too long. Last time it happened, it was because I wore a mask too long, tried to do too much to the point of being totally ineffectual and then poorly handling the fallout. This time I was putting my nose to the grindstone and doing a little bit too much legitimate work, not leaving any time for pleasure. “All work and no play…,” and all that rot.

So I’ve decided that I am going to go on a fast from real work and go on an all games diet, or at least that is the goal. Most likely I will have to do some work, but will be sure to include a steady and heavy dose of games into my daily routine, at least until I start feeling better.

I really should have known better. It’s like running a marathon, steady intake of water and calories. Instead I did a mental version of that time I stayed too long in a sauna and woke up having apparently passed out in a public shower.

75 comments:

  1. I knew it was an ego-death (work) or existential crisis (not enough pleasure) issue . . .

    Sounds like a good dose of "id" comes in handy.

    "You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation." Plato.

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  2. M.E, you need to find yourself a codependent, they are fucking great.

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  3. "All work and no play..." A reason for this intense, hellish boredom perhaps.

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  4. I don't usually find "all play" to be all that relaxing. Sure, work can be stressful, but if I'm taking it easy most of the time, I get bored VERY easily, and this can cause many, many issues...

    Sometimes though (like right now) I need a goddamn vacation though. Even if it's just a week. Recharge the body/mind.

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  5. shut up you faggot.

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  6. ME, plus, you are a girl and we all know it...

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  7. See. LARGE AMOUNTS OF STRESS RELIEF! I have to be constantly playing. It always makes me feel better.

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  8. shut up you faggot.

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  9. Why don't YOU shut the fuck up before I stare at you bitch?

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  10. shut up you faggot.

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  11. "Sometimes (though right now) I need a goddamn vacation"

    I agree whole heartedly. Actually, I leave today for a city plus nature voyage. I will be off the grid for a while.

    Not that anyone cares here in Sociopath World. LOL! Yet you are all a curious lot! "Boredom beware, and held at bay." I thoroughly enjoy how your brains are wired, both collectively and individually.

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  12. you shut the fuck up Anon.

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  13. shut up you faggot.

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  14. Passed out in a Sauna? Damn those artichoke hearts... Shame I wasn't around to see that :)

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  15. shut up you nigger

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  16. Real Psycho ExperienceMarch 31, 2011 at 11:24 AM

    For sociopaths with a yearning to get off the beaten track, Real Psycho Experience opens up a whole new underworld of adventure travel in Iraq, Somalia, Afghanistan, and Sudan. You can even work your way around the underworld experiencing our unique mix of murder, torture, mind control, and rape. I can assist you with all your travel needs - competitive flights, explosives, life insurance, and more. Asphyxia x

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  17. I almost had an emotion today.

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  20. "Real Psycho Experience opens up a whole new underworld of adventure travel in Iraq, Somalia... "

    The first time i heard of the earthquake in japan i wished i was there - not just in the aftermath but during it. woulda been interesting. observing the chaos. them scurrying around with a mix of fear, confusion, and disbelief in their eyes.

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  21. It certainly wouldn't have been dull, Res.

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  22. What the fuck are you talking about? You two would've been to busy scurrying around yourself.

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  23. I think I know what you mean res. Being there but not really being a part. Just a kind of detached observer. Watching them all wail and run about in a frantic state of mind. While you feel nothing similar at all. A strange new experience. Something like that right?

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  24. haha i never 'scurry'
    mis - are you not attracted to things like that?

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  25. Yeah I cum every time I see a spider haha. Who the fuck is attracted to scurrying? I haven't heard that one yet.

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  26. i didn't mean attracted to scurrying, lol. i meant attracted to a crisis situation. the chaos. if you can keep you head when all about you are losing theirs...

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  27. "if you can keep you head when all about you are losing theirs"

    Yeah but in that situation you might lose your head literally. There's no time to stop and reflect about the looks on japanese people's faces when there are buildings coming down all around you. I'd be focused on getting myself out of there. I've seen fear and panic alot of times and it's doesn't interest or repulse me even when I cause it. I'm only interested in why I'm causing it. It's just changes in people's expressions and alot of sweat. I get angry when I have to do something high risk with somebody else and they lose there nerve. I used to like watching buildings getting demolished when I was little though. My uncle used to take me to the sights sometimes because it was part of his job. That was about the only nice thing he ever did for me as I recall haha.

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  28. buildings coming down only lasts a very short time and the odds are pretty good you'll be ok. in the tokyo metropolitan area there's about 35 million people... how many died? like i said, pretty good odds.

    "I've seen fear and panic alot... I'm only interested in why I'm causing it"
    that's quite apt for the bit of the kipling quote i left out; the full line is:
    "If you can keep you head when all about you are losing theirs, and blaming it on you..."

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  29. I wouldn't mind watching it from a helicopter, and the ground as well. But wouldn't go all the way to japan to watch that. It's not that amazing and I'd rather watch TV.

    I might join the army one day. I've always wanted to fight in a real battle, not just one on the streets. Plus I want to get my hands on some serious fire power. I've always liked guns. I own a few but there not as easy to come by in this country seeing as there illegal, and I doubt they'd me buy one even if they were legal. I just hope there's still a war going on by the time I get round to joining(if I do). I am attracted to situations like that. It feels like something big is about to happen. I'm ready for WW3 to start and I wouldn't mind being forced in to action, in fact i'd sign up. I like fighting for survival because after situations like that you come out feeling stronger than ever.

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  30. when have you had to fight for survival mis?

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  31. I have seen a lot of disorder and chaos. What's interesting is when peaceful and familiar streets turn into chaos out of nowhere. From silence to car alarms, crying, and screaming. I love the contrast.

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  32. Well you could say that I had to fight for survival ever since birth. My umbillica cord was wrapped around my neck and was cutting of my oxygen supply. Apparently the stupid midwife didn't know what to do so it was choking me. I don't how hard it could have been to un-wrap it, but there's alot of incompetent people in the world. I've been seriously injured a few times but the first time I had to literally fight for my life was when I wss 15. I had robbed somebody's house and they knew it was me. I knew that he would know but I didn't care. This guy and some of his friends found me when I was walking a few blocks from my house and 2 of them tried to get me with knifes but I ran for it and I hid in this alley way behind an off licence until they pissed off. A couple of days later the guy came round to my house with a couple of friends and they started trying to kick the door in. It was just me and my cousin inside so we slipped out the back door, got their attention and then made a run for it....

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  33. We lead them to the park and then we stopped. One of the guys must have tired out because he wasn't there. The guy whose house I robbed had a knife so I picked up this stick and started swinging it at him. I hit him with it a few it a few times and then my cousin grabbed him from behind after he had taken down of the other guy and I hit him once in the head with the stick and he went down. After that we just kicked the shit out of both of them and then ran back to my house as fast as we could. I felt great afterwards, the best I'd ever felt. I was expecting him to come back with more people but the weeks past and I never saw him again. I guess he didn't have much self respect. I've been in a few other funny situations but I'll save those for later.

    But anyways does anyone else get the feeling that something big is on it's way?

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  34. As long as people are content to be stepped on, no.

    And who's the kid around here using a playstation 3?

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  35. Yeah I'm using a PS3 right now because someone leant it to me and my fucking laptops down. But you wouldn't know unless you've used it as well kiddo.

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  36. ... I was looking at my stats and noticed someone accessed on a PS3. I wasn't directing an insult. I was just curious... Ha.

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  37. Never mind then.

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  38. I want something big to happen like massive terrorist attack. Iove aftermath og those sorts of things when it's on every news channel, everybody's talking about it and you can feel the tension. You blow something up and the whole world goes crazy. If I were a terrorist I'd be setting of small explosions in sub-urban neighbourhoods and quite areas. Everyone expects the attacks to happen in major areas in the inner city but think of the fear it would spread if people weren't safe anywhere. Fuck the trains and the buses. Imagine a grenade coming through window every monday night while you're trying to eat dinner with your family. These terrorists need to think bigger by thinking smaller.

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  40. ummm...you sound kinda....manic and crazy today, misanthrope. talking about terrorist attacks, guns, kicking the shit out of people...or is it just me?

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  41. all games and no rotten food diet i think will probably help

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  42. The idea for targeting neighborhoods is sound to some extent, however, it wouldn't gain nearly as much publicity. I think a combination of the two would be the most effective. An apartment complex leveled at three in the morning (guaranteed high casualties), busy food courts during lunch hour in business districts, in-home executions of politicians and other various local movers and shakers, and remote detonated vehicles packed heavy during traffic jam times. It would cover a lot of the 'essentials' and leave enough room to work with.

    If the everyday Joe to the Higher ups and everything in-between are no longer sacred, everyone is going to have a reason to fear. Because of the effects of such attacks, things like buses, trains, airplanes, churches, etc would be on high alert, and a country can only focus their resources on so many places to protect. When nothing is sacred and everything is a potential target, you've really pulled off the terror in terrorist.

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  43. you people are about to get a knock on the door, or special forces through the window......

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  48. If you've segued onto the topic of terrorism and fear, I always wonder why terrorists don't just hit nursery's. They aren't exceptionally well defended, and what would cause more shock, horror, terror and fear than striking the children of the country?

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  49. you are arguing like mis..

    more shock would be something like what happened in 01

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  50. You are just a garden variety narcissist. You never talk about anything except yourself. While sociopaths are narcissistic, they spend much more time out manipulating and screwing over people than they do in front of the computer screen. When they are on the computer, they are on facebook.

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  52. we are in the hour of april fools...

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  54. M.E:

    "That's the thing with sociopaths, they're fine with running into the red for a little while, particularly depending on the amount of equity already in the relationship, but if they sense something is going to run into the red indefinitely, they would rather just break things off then lose their entire investment. It's like choosing to amputate an infected limb before it spreads to vital organ"...


    sounds like a logical thing to do in that situation?

    is it me or are S always taking logic and turning it into some bs?

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  56. *Smacks aspie with the Clue-Bat*

    No one gives a shit about your taste in music, least of all here. Show your playlist elsewhere.

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  57. Hey Guys! I'm getting engaged! :D
    Come to my wedding you psychopath narcy, bpd and aspie peeps. :D

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  58. thanks for your opinion notable crap

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  59. congrats notme... where is the wedding taking place at?

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  60. is it me or is "notable" as far from a decent PD as you can get?

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  61. Thanks aspie! We don't know yet. No plans or anything. It literally just happened a few hours ago. :)
    Crazy!

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  62. god bless you on your journey always

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  63. is it me or are S always taking logic and turning it into some bs?

    Comment of the year.

    Congrats, notme.

    Didn't you just break up with some dude like 2 weeks ago?

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  64. Hey Thanks Medusa. It's April 1st. You've been my fool. Muhahaha. I can't keep it up, it makes me feel too naughty.

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  65. Ahahahah silly girl.

    Today marks the one year anniversary of my last meeting with the ex and his silent passive-aggressive symbolic gesture of assholery.

    April FOOL day indeed.

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  66. 'his silent passive-aggressive symbolic gesture of assholery.'

    lol. you and your way with words Medusa.

    :D
    Well, as one wise gal said:
    Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice...and I shall murder you in your sleep! Muhahaha! I feel so full of mischief today it's not even funny.

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  67. Haha. Notme I can just imagine the grin on your face and giggle in your voice as you pulled that one, my little mischief merchant.

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  68. i did have a good mischievous giggle tn! :D

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  69. Something's wrong with this feature today. I receive error messages when I attempt to leave a comment, and I don't have the time to write it all over again.

    Best wishes, M.E.

    Okay, one line:

    Maybe this is part of the process they call 'Mellowing Out'?

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