Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Is sociopathy a real thing? (part 1)

From a reader:

I have been thinking about your blog lately though I haven't been there that often in the last year. Listen, about me, I am not so sure I am sociopath. I have tendencies but they are because of the fact that I am from [Eastern Europe] and it's a pretty harsh environment around here socially. Actually I was thinking at some point that I am on the other side of the spectrum - borderline - but I not so sure about that either. Maybe I just fucked up emotionally and stuff, you know? 

What I wanted to tell you in this mail was about [Eastern Europe]. Around here, a lot if not most of the people, act as if they are sociopaths. I mean, the things that you and around your blog are signs of empathy and normality, don't show very much around here. A couple of weeks ago I had to give directions to a girl from America while walking on the street. She showed me some directions she got from another guy and I had to give her a whole new path to follow to reach her destination. I remember telling her after she showed me her directions "I am not sure that this is actually a thing *raised eyebrow*". You know? I mean, around here people aren't at all compassionate because of the environment and the general bad conditions. Though people do show emotions and are compassionate to one another, but only within their groups, never to random people. You can always expect to be cheated somehow around here. Anyway, there's a BIG antisocial vibe all around the country. And I am asking myself, what's the difference between petty criminals like I see here, blunted emotions that people have and an actual sociopath. You know? Because around here, stealing from public funds and cheating people out of their money is a present thing going on, not some "maybe" like in a civilized country. 

I mean, if you take Hare's checklist and go around the street here and rate people, you would get a lot of sociopaths. Though none of them can actually be labeled as one, none or too few. 

So, is your blog just that? Just a place where some people that cheat and lie can exhibit their actions? I mean, anything is possible given the right circumstances, you know? What makes a sociopath special? Everybody can lie and steal and cheat, what is behind that? What is behind the antisocial behavior? What's the sociopath's "soul" like? I would very much like to understand that.

56 comments:

  1. I'm Russian born, currently living in Australia and I gotta say, this sounds just like my experience too. In Russia, people are generally much more hostile to outsiders, but it does not mean that they are socios. It's just a dog eat dog world and outsiders have always been seen as a threat. Not to mention, Americans are not exactly much loved, more seen as a bunch of spoilt, whiny brats with an unrealistic sense of entitlement, so a lot of people would just love to fuck one up any chance they get.
    Personally, I'm a high functioning socio and lets just say that for me emotionally, it really is like being colour blind. Everything is just shades of grey. It takes something very special to make me feel much of anything. I can fake emotions beautifully (love, sadness, grief..)but it really is just a mask most of the time. However, when I get to mess with someone who I feel deserves it, I get a real burst of 'colour', this lovely rush of endorphins.
    To me there is a big difference between lying, cheating, stealing etc to survive, than to do so because you genuinely enjoy fucking people up. The ones who do it to merely provide for themselves and their families generally will not enjoy it, might even feel great sadness at having to resort to these measures, and will regret hurting people. I don't regret much and could not care less about the people I abused, since they were too stupid or weak for their own good and now they've learnt a valuable lesson. So I guess I'm doing them a favour.
    If you are actually agonising over whether or not you are a socio, you're not.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. " Not to mention, Americans are not exactly much loved, more seen as a bunch of spoilt, whiny brats with an unrealistic sense of entitlement, so a lot of people would just love to fuck one up any chance they get."

      Imagine that... a spoiled whiny brat travelling all that way, on their own expense, just to spend more money in your pathetic violent country. It's no wonder you and your people are such an utter failure.

      Delete
    2. Joe, Joe, Joe...(shakes head). I'm merely expressing popular opinion as expressed in the media (Jersey Shore is making it ridiculously easy)
      Also, pay attention: I'm Australian, living quite well personally, and right now my people are doing a hell of a lot better than the good ol' US of A.
      Are you seriously trying to tell me that there is no violence in the US?
      Come on, admit it, you watched Red Dawn for inspiration and voted for Bush twice, did't you?

      Delete
    3. Why thank you, aspie. Very sweet

      Delete
  2. it's not realy nor am i i pretend to be a lot of things but real i am not.
    1st

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    Replies
    1. If you look at how Spartan society was set up (infanticide along with generally brutal practices) it is clear that they as a society must have had less empathy than pretty much all modern societies.

      At the end of this video, Dr. Fallon discusses societies that breed tough guys: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bs1Re2-NAD4

      Delete
  3. i have a collegue from poland who's a a narc i bully him relentless. lots of fun (i am not a racist everyone prey 's the same to me)

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  4. sister of a friend of mine (psychologist) told him sociopath(/pshychopath) doesn't exist.
    i gues in regular psychologie it still doesn't (even if it was in the dsm at some point i gues it's leagal now like being homosexual lol)

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  5. I'm back online, hiding in plain sight. Can anyone find me ?

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    Replies
    1. Michael Martin PlunkettMarch 7, 2012 at 6:39 AM

      dr freud i presume

      Delete
  6. A relative brings me to SW. What is wrong with this person? It has been my life's quest as I seem inextricably tied to the person and have been unable to break the horrific tie.
    I decided to try to face the thing. What IS wrong with the person? I think the person does not have empathy. As such, there is a piece missing.Is it his fault? I don't think so. I think it is as if a person had an arm missing.Is it his fault he cannot play tennis lol

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    Replies
    1. Monica, what , if I may ask, is your definition of being tied to a person? And what makes that experience seem horrific to you?

      Delete
    2. Thank you Anon. A decent question without asparagus.
      If you read Alice Miller "Drama of the Gifted Child" she talks about a mother cathecting a child. This is a mother who thinks the child is part of her as an arm is a part of one's body. This mother feels she can do anything to the child if the child goes against her. The mother is very angry if the child wants any kind of identity of her own. The mother will not hasten to punish, humiliate or whatever is needed to prevent the child from having a separate identity.

      The child may throw away her own identity in the face of this. I did, anyway. If you study the myths of Echo and Narcissus, it is this story.

      So, it was horrific because I felt horribly guilty for any of my own feelings or thoughts and I still do. Truth be told.

      Delete
    3. it sounds like mothers like this would either create beepers or aspd's or children with a great sense of humor.

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    4. I have a great sense of humor on the one hand and a friggin low self esteem on the other.

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    5. Monica, are you still holding out on your socio gf, you little clit-tease. Did you tease your mother like that too?

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    6. LOL My friend was right when I sent him Eden's quote.
      "Jeez! Where do you find people like this?"

      Delete
    7. Why do you keep bringing Eden up? It looks like she moved on. Maybe you should too.

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    8. The current nasty comments are from Eden such as Anon 1:54. Eden's stupidies are good for a laugh.

      Delete
    9. I don't think those comments are Eden. I think you're just obsessed with her. I've seen many people attack you here, Monica. Why can't you just admit to yourself that you might be wrong, and let it go? By playing this childish game, you show your own stupidity, and I recall you saying you don't play these identity/name games.

      Delete
    10. Well, you have a point Anon.

      Delete
    11. "Well, you have a point Anon."

      Funny you should say that Monica, because Anon 4:05 and 4:24, were actually me. Before that, it was someone else. I haven't even had access to the net today. I leave my computer at home these days, so it no longer distracts me from my work. If you want to keep making yourself look like a fool by calling every Anon who snipes at you "Eden", be my guest. But I think this only shows how you refuse to learn.

      I told you I was done with you. I've moved on. Maybe you should do the same.

      Delete
    12. Glad you moved on Eden. It is stupid to be obsessed with someone. Ya know?

      Delete
    13. "Funny you should say that Monica, because Anon 4:05 and 4:24, were actually me."

      "I told you I was done with you. I've moved on. Maybe you should do the same"

      weirdness

      Delete
    14. Anyhoo----onward and upward to new craziness is my motto

      Delete
  7. .... In other news, Coors Light is coming out with a new drink. 'Coors Light Iced Tea. Wonder if they will use the acronym on packaging.... ?

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  8. Why does this all seem so useless ?

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  9. Maybe because someone is trying to hard to make it what it isn't. In other words, Keep it simple stupid!

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  10. I have the suspicion this is not from a reader, and is actually composed by M.E. as a kind of thought experiment. I have a feeling some of the posts by so-called "readers" are his doings, and this is one of them. Delete this post if you like. The truth hits hard right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gee, I wonder who is who here ? lmao

      Amateur at best, but I do get a laugh from time to time.

      Delete
    2. No it's fake.

      Cool guitar solo near end:

      radio

      Delete
  11. Watch your thoughts; they become words.
    Watch your words; they become actions.
    Watch your actions; they become habits.
    Watch your habits; they become character.
    Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

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    Replies
    1. I'm stealing this..

      Delete
  12. Like Hare said, they are different.

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  13. I'd like to suggest a name change or a new name for this blog if I could. I'm thinking "Multiple Reply Link Torture World" and a sociopath .com ...perhaps maybe shortened a little or snazzed up in some clever way, I am not good with that part I admit. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol at 'Multiple Reply Link Torture World'

      Delete
  14. Is anyone still interested in rattling the cage of LoveFraud? There's a very easy way to get in, if you haven't already found out...

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    Replies
    1. To relieve boredom, obviously...

      Delete
  15. Aspie, thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I actually find myself on this site because of a relationship with a Eastern European Gypsy ex-boyfriend. I was warned and knew that there's a lot of sociopathic behavior among Gypsies. It is very interesting to see this post because it makes me think about the fact that the sociopathic, pathological narcissistic behavior is certainly not limited in my ex's country to Gypsies although they're known for it.

    I believe my ex loves me in the way that is described here in a recent post. It's definitely an enthralling kind of love for someone like myself who comes from a background of abuse and neglect. Gypsies are also famous for loving, when they do love, and this famous love-style resembles the love described in the post: all-consuming, fatalistic, dramatic, hungry in the extreme. That is if you are with a sociopath type of Gypsy, there are ones who are not like that at all.

    Anyway, I am struggling to extricate myself from this relationship and I am grateful to read everything I'm finding here.

    Best wishes to everyone.

    ReplyDelete
  17. You guys should check out this book written by a programmer dude: "Spotting fakers". He talks about Fakers and takes the explanation down to the thought level with simple street language. I would never admit to be a sociopath but I must admit he made me look at the Faker in me.

    ReplyDelete
  18. There's culture and behaviour which comes from a harsh environment. It's natural to protect one's self and one's own. As basic needs become scarce competetion becomes fierce, and people cannot afford to be charitable.
    If it means lying, stealing and even killing for food to feed self and family then that's what we do. Even cannibalism, what's considered the most heinous of human acts, isn't off the table. Literature and fiction has explored this time and time again.
    When one becomes accustomed to this behaviour, it's hard not to continue it, even once resources are no longer scarce.
    Many revile jews and gypsies for their sterotypical 'ways', but any people with no homeland, who are targets of hate, persecution and genocide would have no recourse but to resort to mistrust and "anti-social" behaviours against outsiders.

    ReplyDelete

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