Monday, September 13, 2010

Sociopaths in literature: Parolles

Parolles is from Shakespeare's "All's well that ends well," a play arguably about what lengths people will go to to survive according to their own terms. When Parolles (whose name means "words") has been unmasked as a scoundrel, he displays both self-knowledge and a lack of remorse when he asserts, "Simply the thing I am/ Shall make me live. . . ./There’s place and means for every man alive" (All’s Well, IV.iii.333-349).

41 comments:

  1. Need understanding my ex Soicio's words....He tells me his new prey is DIFFERENT? He can not give me examples but says the new realtionship is not rocky as ours. BUT we were together 2 Years and they 3 months. So he says he has no more sexual deviant thoughts and fantasies that was just with ME he wouldn't do those things with her she's DIFFERENT....HUH? Don't get it. Can they actually turn off the sexual behavior...FYI he is a sex addict.

    I see him over extending himself with her way overboard. Doesn't even look normal. He as been missing work going in three days taking off two days. Shortening his work hours. He is attached to the hip with her.

    But he was always so clostephobic about his space. She has a son..he has a son...his son comes first than anyone. I cant imagine him even being fair if his son is wrong..he will will always make his sin better.

    I get everything about him and he knows I know he is a socio. Why would he convert to a different person? Or make ne beleive he is a new man.

    His actions lately seem so careless, no responsibilty for his priorties he sees nothing but his new prey.

    Im sure you guys can give me more clarity. As his actions are odd. Now he is the all american virgin who met the virgin mary!

    Thanks guys love reading your posts

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  2. Maybe you should try contacting the site owner.

    You may find that he responds.

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  3. Are you even sure he was a sociopath? What if he was just using you because you allowed it, and this new person has more respect for themselves, and he likes that and treats them better. Or perhaps whatever he is telling you is a lie, and he's doing this to play with your mind some more. Socios get off on mind games.

    And are you guys still "friends"? How do you know all of this?

    In all, don't let it bother you. It's none of your business what he does with his life. If he was a sociopath and treated you like you weren't worth anything, why would you want that around anyway. I don't know anything other than what you told me, but it sounds like games. Who cares how he treats her, you guys are EXES for a reason. Move on.

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  4. So tru JD....But yes he is a true Socio...but im just trying to understand what he means. But you may be right he may be playing a mind game.

    For two years he was this sexual perv. All of a sudden he is a new man.

    But 300 percent socio he admitted it to me. a year and half into the relationship.

    I guess since socio's answers are always so vague I just that anyone could have some insight on different ...: )

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  5. Well you don't seem very coherent text here but whatever. I don't think this guy is a sociopath, I am not the guy that owns this forum btw, just someone else that knows a lot about it. One, he wouldn't find the need to pronounce his empathic dysfunction. Two, if was even any good he wouldn't be so overly sexual. Sociopaths are cunning and know all the tricks of the trade. If he is, he's a pretty terrible one, probably one with Histrionic Characteristics if anything you said is actually real (Not necessarily lying, just getting wrong impressions). Look up Histrionic Personality Disorder and Anti-Social. Many of socios have characteristics of other PDs, particularly Narcissistic, Borderline and the last of which I have already mentioned.

    Lastly, I don't think you should come here as the sanctuary for answers. Seems pretty silly to me that you're not taking matters into your own hands on the issue, knowing (as you put it) that he's socio.(I think owner actually has made a post about this problem anyway).

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  6. 1.Well i'm actually in therapy because of his emotional abuse and given what I spoke to with the PROFESSIONAL he agrees.

    2. He told me was a sociopath

    3. I guess that makes him a sociopath.

    As far as me coming on this blog for sanctuary not at all that's why I pay my therapist for and my Yoga Instructor.

    I had a question and wanted assistance.

    Not sure what your profession is since you say u know a lot about sociopaths. But I wasn't gearing the questions to ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY KNOW ABOUT SOCIOPATHS.

    The question was for the Socio's who engage in this blog.

    As far as his need to admit his PD. After two years something has to give. If I keep insisting something isn't right! Not sure why he would admit to such if he wasn't and exuded all the symptoms.

    ANONYMOUS than you for your ? hmmm input?

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  7. Funny Anonymous (the one who know alot about socio's) You almost come to the defense of this guy as if you know him.

    You just might be him. Your defense seems to personal.

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  8. So Mr. I don't really know about Sociopath's as I am open to any suggestions. Even from a non experience professional and a non S's.

    I looked up Histrionic Characteristics

    Histrionic Characteristics

    1.A person is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention.

    He hates to be center of attention. Will never throw himself in a position where all eyes are on him.

    2. A person displays inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior when interacting with others.

    He would only display to me never to others. And he was never sexually inappropriate with anyone when having conversations. Very polite and barely said a word.

    3. A person's expressions of emotions rapidly shift and are shallow.

    They would shift, to Angry, Irritable for no reason, or would throw out a snappy comment to degrade me.

    4. A person will draw attention to self using their physical appearance by dressing provocatively.

    He wasn't a sharp dresser. He enjoyed dressing but he would never draw attention towards his dressing. Very conservative.

    5. A person's speech is excessively impressionistic and lacks in detail.

    Very Intelligent man COO of a world renowned company. Made very sense when he spoke and never lacked detail.

    6. A person will show an exaggerated expression of emotion and self-dramatization.

    Never exaggerates. shows NO emotion at all. He has no reaction to anything. He often stares for a few seconds to see the reaction

    7. A person is easily influenced by others.

    Yes and No . If it is a friend he would help to show he is a friend but any other person he wouldn't see the need to

    8. A person perceives relationships to be more intimate than they actually A person with Histrionic Personality Disorder also is overly concerned with their physical appearance and is overly sensitive to disapproval. They do not think before they act. They are self-centered and rarely show concern for others. They also may threaten or attempt suicide in order to get attention.
    He never made an comments about suicide EVER.

    9. WOMEN are commonly diagnosed with Histrionic Characteristics - No he is a MAN!

    As far as being cunning I may be wrong but from what i was told they are naturally cunning. No thought process has to go into the deed. It's their nature.

    And lastly _ ANTI SOCIAL - Isn't that another name for S's?

    I never mentioned anything he did specifically I was just asking about a conversation. So not sure how you think he isn't a good one.

    As far as the sex it was great and if it was bad he wouldn't have hung around for two years. S's do lack
    control an i'm sure he saw something and went after it and left me behind as they all do!

    ReplyDelete
  9. No its says women are more commonly diagnosed with
    Histrionic Characteristics. And what is described is someone looking for attention.

    Attention is the last thing he would like to be drawn on him. He rather be in the background.

    I never gave any examples as to why I think he was an S I just gave description of a conversation,

    So not sure how you think he is not a good S. If the sex wasnt good with me. Trust me he would of told me. It's just how he was. Very blunt to the point. He is a Chief Surgeon Podiatry he has no problem explaining anything. Especially if it is about the body.

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  10. your therapist must be pretty shit at his job because he can't actualy diognose your ex as a sociopath without meeting and examining him.*

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  11. A diagnose wasn't given what I was expressing to the therapist was his opinion abuse of a S. If you read correctly I never said MY Therapist diagnosed him.

    BUT IF YOU READ FURTHER! MY EX CONFIRMED IT!

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  12. and by the way if your serousley expecting assistance or friendly advice from the SOCIOPATHS on this blog then you have alot to learn. you would be better of gearing your quesions towards the people who think they know alot about sociopathy.*

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  13. They have always helped me before whether it was hurtful advice or good advice. You must be new to the blog!

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  14. well i don't think that a genuine sociopath would be so open about it

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  15. How would you know? Your not one!

    And within a year in a half into the relationship with much tug and getting advice from his other medical colleagues. He finally told me. I never said when we met he said his name and also said I'm an S'.

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  16. well the great majority of the "sociopaths" who visit this blog are comlete fruads trust me, and you actualy have no idea what i am. but you are right about one thing, i am new to this blog.

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  17. Really? How would you know if your a new to the blog and you are no expert?

    And maybe you do know because you are one!

    S's always with the vague answers! Poor Thing!

    So if any S's would like to give some input on my original post please feel free to chime in.

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  18. Anon, exactly how many people commenting on this blog have claimed to be a sociopath?

    What is upsetting you so? And why? Curious...

    Someone like you seems to show up at regular intervals, to tell everyone they are frauds when no one has really claimed anything.

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  19. Exactly Medusa...

    But yet has all this input and other diagnosis's.....Something seems very suspect !

    I agree with the other anonymous this may be him who she is talking about!

    Even at the end he states your right you really don't and you actually have no idea what I am!


    Wow soap opera-ish

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  20. nobody on this particular blog yet but many on those related to other articles and i'm not upset in the slightest.

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  21. Hey, I don't know exactly what your looking for. Everytime someone says anything about him not being one, you get defensive. Even if those responding to you aren't or are, we all seem to be saying the same thing, that your ex doesn't sound like one. Sociopaths, typically male, aren't insanely sexual. That is a trait usually found in women sociopaths, or borderlines. Not saying it isn't possible, but the way you word your ex sounds like he had other issues, not lack of empathy, and carelessness towards fellow man. Might have been only lack of respect for you. This is coming from people who are, or know, enough about them.

    Again, even if this all rang true, no matter how bad he may be, WHY do you keep insisting. It's like you are trying to prove to us that he is some hardcore cold hearted badass. Please sweetheart, move on. Stop obsessing over what he is, or what he isn't, or how well he is or isn't treating other people. It's no longer your concern. The only way this would matter to you is if you plan on being with him again, or you are already seeing him again. Whatever it may be, just get away, sociopath or not no one need to treat you that way. It's like you are asking for it, and when you continuously direspect yourself, others are going to notice, and continue the abuse. You don't have to be a sociopath to disrespect a woman with low self esteem.

    Btw, sex addicts aren't in the same category of sociopaths. Sex addicts are missing something, and they use sex as a way to deal. I know enough about APD, and not once has being a sex addict been the major characteristic in diagnosing one. Sex issues has it's own axis, according to the DSM. To me it sounds like he is feeding you bull, and just wants to make himself sound better than he actually is, because you fall for it, and it will bother you. Narcissistic characteristics, and that of someone seriously insecure.

    It could be sociopathy, but like I stated in the beginning, the most important part of my rambling, WHO CARES! MOVE ON! PLEASE!

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  22. First of all only one person gave an opinion! And if any obsessing is going on it's from Mr. know it all who KEEPS INSISTING he isn't.

    I never asked ANYONE to advise me if he was an S or not!

    Again I know and he knows! So really off the topic!

    FML

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  23. well realistically how the fuck are any of us supposed to offer you any advice? we don't even know the guy, you should try asking him what he meant or as jd said just forget about it.*

    ReplyDelete
  24. Sociopaths, typically male, aren't insanely sexual. That is a trait usually found in women sociopaths, or borderlines.

    I don't necessarily think this is true.

    But the rest of your post stands. Doesn't matter if he's a sociopath or not... the advice you get anywhere (sociopath blog or not) will probably be the same.

    The guy sounds like an immature douche who doesn't seem to know himself very well or what he wants. Nothing you can do about that.

    Your reactions are normal... and I know you want to try and figure it out, but you probably never completely will. Only thing you can do is take responsibility for yourself and your own choices [insert reference to featured comment here].

    It may take some time to truly get there, is all.

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  25. Well, you know what that's probably the best advice since this exchange!

    But hooked on phonics works really well! And I was asking for a general advice nothing specific!

    But again reading does a brain good! LOL This is so funny!

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  26. Thank you Medusa!

    Sadly, others chime in from the ass in and gear off the topic to try to show some sort of intelligence.

    i dont take anything personal and hopefully others are able learn as we try to Intelligently give advice to each other!

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  27. I went off on a tangit, but I can agree. She needs to move on. Hopefully end of topic.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Just take Medusa's advice...as you mentioned you and him know. Which is all that matters

    You can pick and choose who's advise you wish to take.

    Maybe you can reach out to his colleagues since you mentioned they are in the medical field.

    I have been in this position and it is difficult to tell people and have them believe you.

    Keep your head up and my opinion is he sounds like an S. Being overly attentive and not leaving her side. The paranoia of being abandoned. When you meet a new person and want to show them how dedicated you can be and the only way you can show is by overly smothering them with time and dazzling them
    with expensive gifts and trips.

    I was her. He smothered me, alienated me, I needed nothing he provided everything. Financially, emotionally.

    Then he found another interesting one and left me to fend for myself. Sex was amazing how i craved it. When I met him I had no sexual experience he lured me into his world very slowly then I was fully submissive to his every sexual need.

    So this is his lure to her and he will say "Hey lets' try this" and she will think this is something between her and him and be another fool in love.

    So this may be his way of trying to prove he is the one to this new one. But that doesn't last long.

    So she will be in your shoes soon...Just look at it when you first met him. Im sure he swept you off your feet then the real him appeared

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  29. Just take Medusa's advice...as you mentioned you and him know. Which is all that matters

    You can pick and choose who's advise you wish to take.

    Maybe you can reach out to his colleagues since you mentioned they are in the medical field.

    I have been in this position and it is difficult to tell people and have them believe you.

    Keep your head up and my opinion is he sounds like an S. Being overly attentive and not leaving her side. The paranoia of being abandoned. When you meet a new person and want to show them how dedicated you can be and the only way you can show is by overly smothering them with time and dazzling them
    with expensive gifts and trips.

    I was her. He smothered me, alienated me, I needed nothing he provided everything. Financially, emotionally.

    Then he found another interesting one and left me to fend for myself. Sex was amazing how i craved it. When I met him I had no sexual experience he lured me into his world very slowly then I was fully submissive to his every sexual need.

    So this is his lure to her and he will say "Hey lets' try this" and she will think this is something between her and him and be another fool in love.

    So this may be his way of trying to prove he is the one to this new one. But that doesn't last long.

    So she will be in your shoes soon...Just look at it when you first met him. Im sure he swept you off your feet then the real him appeared

    ReplyDelete
  30. Just take Medusa's advice...as you mentioned you and him know. Which is all that matters

    You can pick and choose who's advise you wish to take.

    Maybe you can reach out to his colleagues since you mentioned they are in the medical field.

    I have been in this position and it is difficult to tell people and have them believe you.

    Keep your head up and my opinion is he sounds like an S. Being overly attentive and not leaving her side. The paranoia of being abandoned. When you meet a new person and want to show them how dedicated you can be and the only way you can show is by overly smothering them with time and dazzling them
    with expensive gifts and trips.

    I was her. He smothered me, alienated me, I needed nothing he provided everything. Financially, emotionally.

    Then he found another interesting one and left me to fend for myself. Sex was amazing how i craved it. When I met him I had no sexual experience he lured me into his world very slowly then I was fully submissive to his every sexual need.

    So this is his lure to her and he will say "Hey lets' try this" and she will think this is something between her and him and be another fool in love.

    So this may be his way of trying to prove he is the one to this new one. But that doesn't last long.

    So she will be in your shoes soon...Just look at it when you first met him. Im sure he swept you off your feet then the real him appeared

    ReplyDelete
  31. Well not according to the DSM IV but whatever. I however noticed that clearly English isn't one of your strongest suits. Perhaps if you were more coherent maybe I could even debate this 'intelligently with you' but I doubt it.

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  32. HaHaHa ...It's ok again I NEVER wanted YOUR debate!

    As far as English yes, you are right English is not my first language. As I have immigrated to this country ten years ago.

    Perhaps if you were more open-minded and mature we probably can have an open discussion without the degrading.

    Hopefully, you can come to terms with your own personal issues. Which obviously are way beyond this blog!

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  33. When S's find a benefit in maintaing a relationship the relationship will last as long as the S is satisfied and is able to be free and not questioned.

    Every relationship will be different. To answer your question they do have the ability to switch off and on. It is part of what makes them.

    Be happy he has moved on. To be in a relationship with someone with ANY PD is abuse.

    Grieving and questions are normal as Medusa mentioned.

    Anyone with a PD who makes you feel less than them has conquered their own self esteem.

    Do not feed in to the darkness.

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  34. Inside the Mind of a Sociopath

    http://www.cix.co.uk/~klockstone/spath.htm

    This is a very interesting article!

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  35. 'To be in a relationship with someone with ANY PD is abuse.' - What a sweeping statement!!

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  36. Disorder-a physical condition in which there is a disturbance of normal functioning.

    Why would anyone want to maintain a relationship with everyday disturbance of normal functioning. Which would lead to some type of abuse

    A very accurate statement!

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  37. This pertains to the original question:
    The answer was givine in reference to S's have emotions!

    Aerianne said...
    Redwald's comment state, "Then they may conclude that the behaviors they saw as “kind” and “caring” were deliberately contrived by the psychopath in order to “take them in” and “put them off their guard.”" And then, "That may well be true in some cases, but in other cases it may not be true at all. The contradictory behaviors may be largely random and impulsive, not part of any greater “scheme” or purpose."

    I think this is where being in a relationship with a psychopath becomes maddening. You see some behaviors from them that seem so genuine that you have no reason to doubt them. At at later time you may see behaviors that so contradict the earlier behaviors that you are left feeling like everything was bullshit and you got conned. Then a loop of trying to analyze the behaviors sets itself up and you get trapped. You are pitting the two behaviors against each other expecting one to be true and one to be a lie. The truth may be something that you never expected: Each of the behaviors were genuine.

    This answers your original question

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