Saturday, September 25, 2010

No longer a "victim" of a sociopath

A reader and the author of a sociopath survival book, Dark Souls gives this opinion about healing:
I had an email from a woman who said I am thinking about going back to my sociopath ex. He is thinking about being open and honest. What do you think ?

I said I think the chances are he has been caught with his pants down and wants to keep the relationshp going in the hope that he might be able to have you for supply in the future. I get a reply back to say he has raped, buggered, and battered her. Why does she want to go back. Because it feeds into her victim mentality and she is not ready to heal.

To heal you have to stop being a victim. Its basically that we have to understand the sociopath, narcissist or psychopath, know what they do to manipulate us us then STOP trying to figure them out. Then we stop being a victim and Then we can heal. Learn why we would have such low self esteem to want to be with these people in the first place. work on that and then we can leave.
A reader mentioned reading it, so I asked for her opinion on the book:
One thing that drove me nuts were all of the typos. For the amount that she's charging that book shouldn't have a bunch of typos. I am a technical writer so maybe I am too picky.
She also kept talking about this douche who she calls Oliver over and over and she's all over the place with time references. She kept saying that she didn't want to sound like she's a victim but that's exactly what she sounded like to me. I also had an issue for her not ever once taking responsibilty for her actions. Nothing was her fault. I asked her why she didn't acknowledge responsibility for fucking a married man for five years, and what about what she did to his wife? NOPE, her excuse was that he said he had cancer. Another thing I disliked about her book was how she went on with this whole spiritual crap.
I think I found her book on an "anti-sociopath" site. I mean I don't like getting fucked over but Jesus tap dancing Christ, take some responsibility for your actions. Empaths want you guys to take responsibility so why won't they/we?
I honestly cannot remember how I found your site but it has been more helpful than anything. However, I am not like most empaths so I guess I'm in between. I think the book, "He's Just Not That into You" was more helpful than any of these empath pussies.
They want to crucify you guys without looking at themselves.
I think that if you are going to write one of these self-help books then you should be an expert or guru. I think I could write a better book than she did.
Anyway, if you did recommend it, the empaths would go apeshit and whine some more and it would give you sociopaths plenty of ammo.
So there ya go. Two sides...

88 comments:

  1. lol, wow.

    I wonder what the woman considers herself if she is so harsh towards empaths, but not a sociopath. Is there even such thing as a half sociopath???

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  2. I like the second commenter. Sound reasoning, no delusions about fault in a sociopathic relationship, and a real desire (and capacity) to rise above the victim mentality.

    Also, technical writing is a very sexy skill. But that's probably just me.

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  3. Bahahahahaha... I'm sorry, I was just noodling around on the woman's site and found this page. Fucking full stop.

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  4. That one webpage, alone, is an effin' train wreck.

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  5. Jesse - there's a very wide spectrum without clearly defined boundaries.

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  6. Oh....okay? Thanks?

    I'm not going to lie, your comment confused me B.

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  7. gott love that picture.


    Grace

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  8. I've just stumbled on this blog and see some great stuff here. The thing about no longer being a "victim" vs. healing is ... I'm confused about which one comes first. Do people just suddenly have a revelation that they're no longer a "victim" and ready to begin the healing process, or do you begin to heal and therefore are no longer a victim? It seems like a very fine line.

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  9. very funny LOL from the author of above book.

    If my memory doesn't fail me judging by all the emails I received.

    Bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that one of the things the author wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told he he got cancer "after". Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in. Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up. Nothing more than I expected really I didn't expect a fair review on here LOL and if anyone actually read had the book it was a book about looking at why I chose to be with him in the first place and why certain types of people choose to be with these people because of low self esteem along with multiple pages on how to spot abusive behaviour. Bet she didn't mention any reference to the months where the writer spend all her time being up on "herself" up for it being her fault as thats one of her beliefs.

    The references to "Oliver" were done to highlight what types of things a psychopathic narcissist does along with many other stories from other different people along the way.

    As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.

    I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com

    http://darksouls-thebook.com/Reviews-for-dark-souls.html

    Is it any wonder I put up the page about "Cant afford the book" when up until I put it up my inbox was full of emails from empaths wanting to go back to their abusive sociopaths, narcissist, psychopaths exs and so on who were probably emailing every other website about their stuff as well. It was a way of saying get out of victim mode and either buy the book or not.

    We all have a choice to play in to the role of the victim or not as despite what this reader thinks she knows I am not a victim anymore.


    So there you go '3 sides to the story” LOL



    So there you go "3 sides to the story" LOL

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  10. very funny LOL from the author of above book.

    If my memory doesn't fail me judging by all the emails I received.

    Bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that one of the things the author wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told he he got cancer "after". Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in. Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up. Nothing more than I expected really I didn't expect a fair review on here LOL and if anyone actually read had the book it was a book about looking at why I chose to be with him in the first place and why certain types of people choose to be with these people because of low self esteem along with multiple pages on how to spot abusive behaviour. Bet she didn't mention any reference to the months where the writer spend all her time being up on "herself" up for it being her fault as thats one of her beliefs.

    The references to "Oliver" were done to highlight what types of things a psychopathic narcissist does along with many other stories from other different people along the way.

    As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.

    I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com


    Is it any wonder I put up the page about "Cant afford the book" when up until I put it up my inbox was full of emails from empaths wanting to go back to their abusive sociopaths, narcissist, psychopaths exs and so on who were probably emailing every other website about their stuff as well. It was a way of saying get out of victim mode and either buy the book or not.

    We all have a choice to play in to the role of the victim or not as despite what this reader thinks she knows I am not a victim anymore.


    So there you go '3 sides to the story” LOL

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  11. very funny LOL from the author of above book.
    If my memory doesn't fail me judging by all the emails I received.
    Bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that one of the things the author wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told he he got cancer "after". Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in. Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up. Nothing more than I expected really I didn't expect a fair review on here LOL and if anyone actually read had the book it was a book about looking at why I chose to be with him in the first place and why certain types of people choose to be with these people because of low self esteem along with multiple pages on how to spot abusive behaviour. Bet she didn't mention any reference to the months where the writer spend all her time being up on "herself" up for it being her fault as thats one of her beliefs.
    The references to "Oliver" were done to highlight what types of things a psychopathic narcissist does along with many other stories from other different people along the way.
    As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.
    I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com
    Is it any wonder I put up the page about "Cant afford the book" when up until I put it up my inbox was full of emails from empaths wanting to go back to their abusive sociopaths, narcissist, psychopaths exs and so on who were probably emailing every other website about their stuff as well. It was a way of saying get out of victim mode and either buy the book or not.
    We all have a choice to play in to the role of the victim or not as despite what this reader thinks she knows I am not a victim anymore.


    So there you go '3 sides to the story” LOL

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  12. Ugh, I was a technical writer for a short bit. Highest paid job I've ever had, but also the very very worst job I ever had.

    Technical writers must be amongst some of the most jaded people on earth, at least the ones I worked with.

    Kristen, stopping being a victim is not a passive thing. It doesn't just come over you like some grand illuminous wave.

    It's a cosnscious decision to not take on the victim role. It also involve taking responsibility for yourself and asking what it was about you that got yourself in the situation. Because it's the only thing you can do anything about.

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  13. Jesse: It's like the autism spectrum, you can be autistic but still very highly functioning (Aspergers).

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  14. "Do people just suddenly have a revelation that they're no longer a "victim" and ready to begin the healing process, or do you begin to heal and therefore are no longer a victim? It seems like a very fine line"

    I just got bored with it. I wasn't going anywhere with it. I didn't get any closure by feeling like a victim. There was no chance for healing if I kept myself in that mode..nowhere else to go with it. No one would stamp a label on it saying "you're right" either. I did talk with my therapist, some friends and then coming here helped for sure.

    I don't like the word victim though. I never felt like a victim exactly, I felt like a loser. Not saying I was all wrong and he was whatever he was and it's ok but I just take responsibility for my own stuff. That's the best thing for me. Even if he called me up and said I'm sorry for everything, it wouldn’t change the fact that I screwed myself more than he did, simply because I allowed it to continue beyond the point of me suspecting something wasn’t normal with us.

    This is just my feeling though.

    Grace

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  15. From the author of Dark Souls. To be honest, its just not worth the energy to defend myself and argue with you guys.. However Having dealt with one particular psychopath whilst writing the book which were interesting to say the least. Plus my psycho ex still trying to stalk and add me on facebook its time to disengage and walk away. From experience I know that sometimes the winning is in actually walking away and disengaging. However in view of this readers comments I will defend myself contined below......

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  16. If my memory doesn't fail me judging by all the emails I received from her!

    I bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after". Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in. Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs. Nothing more than I expected really I didn't expect a fair review on here LOL and if anyone actually read had the book it was a book about looking at why I chose to be with him in the first place and why certain types of people choose to be with these people because of low self esteem along with multiple pages on how to spot abusive behaviour and stop being a victim.... continued

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  17. Bet she didn't mention any reference to the months where I spent months "beating" myself up as thats one one of my stupid beliefs and once we change them we not longer want to be around these people

    The frequent references to "Oliver" were done to highlight what types of things a psychopathic narcissist does along with many other stories from other different people along the way.

    As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.

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  18. I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com


    http://darksouls-thebook.com/Reviews-for-dark-souls.html


    Is it any wonder I put up the page about "Cant afford the book" when up until I put it up my inbox was full of emails from empaths I (none of whome wanted to heal) and wanting to go back to their abusive sociopaths, narcissist, psychopaths exs and so on who were probably emailing every other website about their stuff as well. It was a way of saying get out of victim mode and either buy the book or not so I didn't have to engage with these people either.


    We all have a choice to play in to the role of the victim or not as despite what this reader thinks she knows I am not a victim anymore.


    So there you go '3 sides to the story” LOL

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  19. I don't like the word victim though. I never felt like a victim exactly, I felt like a loser. Not saying I was all wrong and he was whatever he was and it's ok but I just take responsibility for my own stuff.


    hey Grace, just because you "lost" in a relationship and got taken advantage of, you shouldn't think of yourself as a loser! someone commented recently that they were a winner even when they lost because they learned from it - or something to that effect. my apologies to whoever wrote it (Ukan?) if i got it wrong. but great point.

    losing doesn't make you a loser. you can't win every time. but always losing, always being the victim, does. it's a lazy way to make yourself real. or maybe a desperate way?

    i think the sociopath's charm lies in his ability to create you, the you that you've always wanted to be, without you having to do any of the work. when he's gone you lose not just him, but most importantly you lose you. which is maybe why the victims hang on to being victims, and are so bitter and, dare i say, un-empathic about it. it lets them feel that at least like that they still exist.

    to know yourself is the best defence. the sociopaths know themselves. the empaths want the sociopaths to know them too. why is that? why is it that the empaths want to know themselves, and if they're honest, really only themselves, through the eyes of the sociopath?

    for as long as i've been following this blog i've always sympathized with the sociopaths. and i've even wondered if i am one (hoped maybe?). i'm not. it's the way empaths blame the sociopath for taking advantage of their empathy that makes me wish i were one.

    you can't take advantage of empathy. only of a lazy mind.

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  20. I was just going to make a dismissive comment, but you pissed me off enough that I have to rip you up.

    "To be honest, its just not worth the energy to defend myself and argue with you guys.."

    And then you do it, anyway. Shut up.

    "However Having dealt with one particular psychopath whilst writing the book which were interesting to say the least. Plus my psycho ex still trying to stalk and add me on facebook its time to disengage and walk away. "

    I will not read your book because you can't string together a coherent sentence and you think someone trying to add you on Facebook is a thing. Grow the fuck up.

    You then go on to "defend yourself" by publicizing the details of some reader's email. At least I think that's what you did. It's hard to tell. I don't know how you came to the conclusion that the person that reviewed your book is the one who emailed you.

    Your overuse of the phrase "bet you" speaks to your immaturity and defensiveness.

    In short, I hope you are struck blind and your hands and tongue are amputated so you can never again produce this shit you call writing, even by dictation.

    On a separate note, LOL means "laughing out loud". If you find yourself bursting into laughter midsentence on a regular basis, you should consult with a doctor.

    Now, with that out of the way, I congratulate you on getting something published. Then again, they also published Twilight.

    It doesn't help your case that you're trying to help victims when you troll sociopath sites and tear into people who dislike your book. What did you expect, here of all places?

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  21. Zoe,

    I get with all that. But I don't know where the lazy mind would come from. I'm so involved in my academic life that I have no other life..lol. I think it just comes from I want what I want and I want it NOW. I didn't THINK before I accepted what he was telling me as a truth. I just believed it as though I had no choice but to. It's hard to explain. I wanted everything he presented to me, about himself, his future and how much he respected me. When I said I felt like a loser I really did. Not because I lost him but because I lost my self worth. Somebody mentioned self esteem the other day here..self esteem isn't reliable it always fluctuates from week to week. To me self worth is more of a constant feeling. I just devalued myself. The other part is that he never brought closure to me. It's like he died.

    I have been thinking that maybe he scared himself with all the lies. How could he have brought so much to fruition and how could I have expected it from him?? It just wasn’t' meant to be. Better for me though because there is no question that he is a sociopath. That much I'm certain of.

    Grace

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  22. !off topic..being that you guys are a bunch of know it alls..I'm doing a research paper on Benedict Spinoza. If you have any comments or can suggest a source I would appreciate it. I'm ready to pay Postmodern to do it for me!! There's just too much to understand...I can't. I should have chosen George Lucas..but NOOO I had to pick a fuckin philosopher.

    Grace

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  23. I have a bunch of books about his work in PDF that I could send you, if you want. I might even have some primary texts if I dig around a bit.

    Though I do like the payment idea. :D

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  24. Grace, i wasn't really referring to you, but to the people who don't learn from experience but keep looking for someone else or even a cause to give them an identity.. the serial victims. if it comes entirely from the outside then your self-esteem will depend entirely on what is going on outside.

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  25. I wonder what the woman considers herself if she is so harsh towards empaths, but not a sociopath. Is there even such thing as a half sociopath???

    I'm gotta say I'm with Jesse on this one. The commenter belies her self-hate a little bit.

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  26. why not half-sociopath or half-empath? must everyone who isn't a sociopath by default be an empath then? that's way too black and white for me. :)

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  27. Yes, but then what's the point in having terms like "sociopath" and "empath" in the first place? Where's the line?

    It's not comparable to autism. Everyone on the autism spectrum is autistic in some form.

    By contrast, everyone in the world would lie somewhere on the empath-sociopath spectrum.

    Plus, the whole empath/sociopath dichotomy seems to engender a "for or against" mentality. When there is no clear line, who exactly is the "enemy"?

    Would be nice if it was truly a spectrum, though, because then maybe the idea that sociopathy is automatically a pathology would go away. And it wouldn't have to enable such a "fear of the other" mentality with regards to sociopathy.

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  28. So based on the way everyone here talks you just consider empaths non-sociopaths? because the definition of the word claims it is someone who is highly in tune to people's feelings which doesnt sound to me like every non-sociopath. which might me why this woman doesn't consider herself an empath.

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  29. You are right. Strictly speaking, an empath isn't supposed to mean any ol' non-sociopath. An empath is supposed to be a Highly Sensitive Person or a psychic or some shit.

    But around these parts it does seem to mean anybody without a personality "disorder".

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  30. ah gotcha, yea I always thought it was like a clairvoyant or something.

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  31. In order to help yourself you have to know yourself. A lot of these "empaths" don't know themselves, so they can't help themselves. Also you can't always feel your way out of your problems. A problem is only solved when you do the calculation in your head (not your heart) and take action.

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  32. @Sarah the problem I have with your book is it's the same standard routine. A woman who is the "victim" of the sociopath writes a book no how not to be the "victim" of a sociopath.

    What I'm waiting to see is a successful businessman writing a book on how he has manipulated, exploited, and out hustled empath and sociopath alike.

    If you are good at what you do and you know yourself you won't see yourself as a victim. You might not win every battle, but when you lose it's because you didn't find the right answer, didn't make the right decision, wasn't accurate enough, efficient enough, effective enough, strategic or sneaky enough, ultimately war is about preparation.

    1. "All war is based on deception. "
    Sun Tzu

    2. "Can you imagine what I would do if I could do all I can?"
    Sun Tzu

    3. "If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles. "
    Sun Tzu

    4. "Opportunities multiply as they are seized. "
    Sun Tzu

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  33. @Savavelight I agree and its very easy to win with these guys. I could have won any time I wanted and obviously I am not going to go into details about that but if I did it would make the readers fall off the floor laughing in their chair and probably be a bestseller LOL. My question when I chose "not to Win" with my psycho ex and walk away, and also got an email from another person asking "How do we win" and I posed it to George Simon in an interview I posted on the website. His reply was anyone who wants to win so much makes them as disorded as the person they are trying to get away from! If of course I ever decide to be a psycho I will happily write about how I destroy him LOL LOL LOL . Sarah

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  34. Sarah as far as I'm concerned, pacifism is the only disorder. You can't win every battle but you have to put up a fight to let the others know that you don't appreciate how you are being treated and that you are not a victim.

    How do you win against a sociopath? The same way you win against anybody else. Every individual has strengths and weaknesses, to win you learn to exploit weaknesses and manipulate.

    Sarah I'm willing to do something I've never done before. I'm willing to discuss this with you in private. Give me some information so that I can contact you or contact me by my screen name.

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  35. as for empaths and highly sensitive people. They should have an inate ability to "tune in" and pick up on others emotionals and feelings. There are empaths who know they are are empaths and then there are empaths haven't got a clue and are literally energetic, emotional gunk buckets for not only their own but everyone elses feelings around them. An "aware" empath or whatever name you want to call it is able to separate out their own feelings from those of others. Most victim empaths have so much crap and low self esteem they dont even know who they are so will happily mix with sociopaths. Once they sort out their own crap, which may include low self esteem and so on, and realise what are their own feelings and start tuning into to what is theirs and not theirs, If they are not disordered they will start to see a difference between the two feelings. then they won't want to be around disorded people unless of course they are as disorded as them.

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  36. @anonymous/sarah mixing with sociopaths aren't the problem. Treating sociopaths as you would treat an empath is the problem. You cannot expect empathy from a sociopath, you communication through reasonability.

    If you have low self esteem it's a sign that you aren't reasonable, easy prey. If you have high self esteem it means you are reasonable which means whoever tries to take advantage of you is in for the fight of their lives, sociopath or empath it shouldn't matter.

    You cannot avoid sociopaths, you will have to learn to deal with them one way or the other, better to learn it sooner rather than later. That being said there are some kinds of sociopaths that nobody can deal with, and these are the ones who find themselves in prison, the sociopath who you can deal with are the successful sociopaths.

    The successful sociopaths understand that actions have consequences. Remind them of the consequences, and be ruthless in dishing them out. If you threaten to sue then you make sure you do it. Nothing can talk you out of it.

    One common mistake that people make is they say "If you do this I'll..." but then they don't follow through. Consistent behavior allows the sociopath to understand you and if you are consistently reasonable, and you know what they want, you can negotiate at least on the business level to find a solution where each of you can get what you want.

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  37. @Anonymous/Sarah continued

    If you enter into a friendship with a sociopath, you make it clear in the beginning what you want or expect, the behavior you will not tolerate, and the consequences. Despite the movies and stuff like this, most sociopaths aren't violent, are susceptible to fear, can easily be manipulated, are just as naive as empaths, aren't any more intelligent than empaths, and have sociopath specific weaknesses such as inability to rely on teamwork to solve certain kinds of problems, inability to trust, inability to let down their mask (many empaths have these problems too but you apparently don't), inability to have self control over emotions (many empaths have this problem too).

    You don't have to become a psycho or sociopath. You just have to be willing to go as far as it takes and do whatever it takes to win in certain specific instances. If you determine what the sociopath fears most then you can prey on the sociopath just as the sociopath can prey on your fears. Everybody is vulnerable and weak once you get to know them.

    The only problem I have is with empaths who take the pacifist approach of turning the other cheek in every interaction. Yes you shouldn't fight every battle as sometimes you have more to lose than to gain by fighting, but when you have more to gain than to lose by fighting and when you have a very high chance of winning the fight, even if you look ruthless, evil or psycho, it's better to take the victory any way you can get it and seize the opportunity.

    The difference between a winner and loser is often because the winner had the element of surprise and seized an opportunity that the loser didn't even know about.

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  38. Savagelight, not everything is a war, and not everyone has the need to "win".

    Some people have different priorities. Obviously.

    Besides, sometimes winning doesn't require any action at all.

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  39. Also, if you "win" and the other person doesn't give a shit, that isn't much of a victory, now is it?

    No. You just turn yourself into a fool.

    This goes for both sides of the argument.

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  40. I love these comments and no, just because you don't sympathize with people who whine and act like victims all of the time, doesn't mean you are a sociopath. I am an empath because I FEEL whereas sociopaths don't. However, I do not feel sympathy for people who blame all of their problems on their childhood or other people all of the time.
    I am and have taken responsibility for my stupidity and bad choices.
    I don't loathe or hate myself; quite the contrary! I truly love my life and myself. It took years, but I got over blaming everyone else but myself. I quit blaming my parents and exes.
    And yes, while I am too "chickenshit" to write my own book, Sarah, I still think and I say this with a great deal of respect whether you agree or not that you are very self-promoting.
    In your book you talk about your mom and your dad affecting your decisions but you still stayed with Oliver for FIVE YEARS. That's a long time to stay with a married man. I asked you to explain why you didn't see what you were doing to his wife. You said he convinced you that he had cancer and that you had low self-esteem.
    You also said in one of your emails that sociopaths have no souls! That doesn't sound very empathic to me.
    Yet, you want to help people. Tell EMPATHS to stop getting into relationships that are jacked from the get go. The site I found that recommended this book, said that you could tell people how to avoid sociopaths from the get-go, but that really wasn't the case. You talk about AURAs and things like that, which is fine, but you still never take true responsibility. An EMPATH is supposed to be able to understand what someone else would feel in put in their shoes.
    So I apologize if I offended you but I meant what I said.
    While we all do things that are wrong, me included. I still feel as though we should take responsibility for our own actions which you didn't, in my opinion.
    I also don't understand why you seem to be so upset that people on this site don't like your book.
    WTF did you expect? It's a sociopath site! You should welcome criticism for everyone!
    I have learned more from this site because eventhough there are some assholes, most of the people are real. I may not agree with everything and I sure as hell don't want to be unfeeling but I don't want to whine and cry because I got fucked over!
    Instead, I choose to stand up, brush myself off and move forward and that is without spending tons of money on retrieving spiritual energy or healing rituals. Just sayin'...

    ReplyDelete
  41. great comments above.

    Ammy said..
    You also said in one of your emails that sociopaths have no souls! That doesn't sound very empathic to me.


    good point. what i don't understand is if the author stayed with her ex out of empathy because he said he had cancer, how did he take advantage of her? if you choose to give, no one is taking advantage of you.. unless you expect to get something back.

    i haven't read the book but from the comments posted i don't see how it's all his fault. how is he a sociopath?

    ReplyDelete
  42. Medusa said...
    Yes, but then what's the point in having terms like "sociopath" and "empath" in the first place? Where's the line?

    Would be nice if it was truly a spectrum, though, because then maybe the idea that sociopathy is automatically a pathology would go away. And it wouldn't have to enable such a "fear of the other" mentality with regards to sociopathy.


    isn't it a spectrum though? i thought i read in an earlier post somewhere that there is a kind of light version of the sociopath (who senses something is missing and consequently is more susceptible to fanatically buying into dogma).

    i think like a sociopath and have similar abilities, but feel like an empath. what does that make me? if you're right and there is no spectrum, then we're missing a third category.

    if sociopath is a label for a disorder, isn't it logical then that empath is too (at least the way it's used here)? in this case, the third label might be normal (a balance of both thinking and feeling). which to me implies a spectrum.

    i don't believe in personality disorders, just personalities, where each of us is a unique mix of what life throws at us and how we cope. all special snowflakes..

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous said...
    There are empaths who know they are are empaths and then there are empaths haven't got a clue and are literally energetic, emotional gunk buckets for not only their own but everyone elses feelings around them.


    lol.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Done and done. Turns out I did have the collected works.

    ReplyDelete
  45. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  46. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  47. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  48. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  49. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Grace, lemme know if those emails went through. The files were largish, and I just wanna be sure.

    ReplyDelete
  51. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  52. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?
    6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  53. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get a bit aggravated.
    So for the fun of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you before that, that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything?
    You go on and on throughout the entire book about him being married.
    3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got alot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done. I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. Nothing in your book says anything about you being an anti-victim, nor does it ever imply that, in fact you imply the opposite.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I am not nor even will be afraid of what someone writes about me. I don’t have the need to be liked. I enjoyed arguing with someone on a site because you never see that person. They cannot hurt you or stalk you. Sarah, WTF does that have to do with your book?

    ReplyDelete
  54. 6. (I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and in fact, asked for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans" yet you seem to seek their approval on this site.
    You also told me in an email that karma didn’t apply to sociopaths.
    I didn’t think your entire book was rubbish and I even told you that.
    However, it does seem to me that you are still trying to win the respect of sociopaths and I ask why?
    Why do you care what they think? I’ll bet they don’t care what you think. I know I don’t.
    Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  55. So far I got 1. Subject..Last Spinoza Book. How many did you send? It may take a while.

    Grace

    ReplyDelete
  56. It was just two, but I thought the first one might not have gone through. I'll resend it.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Ok I got both. Thank you so much Postmodern;)I will look at them tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  58. I wasn't going to address what Sarah, the author of "Dark Souls" posted concerning my opinion about her book but wow did she get aggravated.
    So for the sake of someone who is acting a lot more like a narcissist than an empath, here are some of my rebuttals:
    1. Sarah you really shouldn't misquote but that's what usually happens when you can't take any sort of criticism.
    2. (i bet the "empath" woman in question doesn't mention that she emailed the author telling her that she was an Empath had been doing it herself ! bet she didn't also mention that that I wrote in the book was that I actually finished with the guy BECAUSE he was married and "then" he told me he got cancer "after".)
    Doing what myself? Making stupid mistakes? Yes. But you were with him for five years and he told you he was married before that he had cancer and what does having him having cancer have to do with anything? You mentioned over and over again that he was married. I only wanted to point out that you never talked about how destructive that could be to another human. After all, if you are a true empathy, then that should have at least been some consideration at some point for his family’s feelings, but you never mention it. You only mention having low self esteem and how you felt so low. Not how you needed to take responsibility for you part in what was going on. Yes, he was a dick to his wife but so were you. My point was that it wasn’t all about you.

    ReplyDelete
  59. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I enjoyed “sparing” as it were on a blog site rather than in person because an exchange of words is much safer than someone getting angry and stalking you. Besides WTF does that have to do with my opinion of your book?

    ReplyDelete
  60. 6.( I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and even asked me for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here. Your book had a lot of potential and it wasn’t total rubbish but in my opinion which I thought I was allowed to express, there were some things I thought devalued you as an expert.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans".
    Page 185 of your book you talk about your vag and your IUD.
    Like I said before, there was a lot of good in your book but if you cannot take some criticism then I pity you. Good luck…
    Tell you what I’ll give my copy to several friends and see what they say…

    ReplyDelete
  61. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I enjoyed “sparing” as it were on a blog site rather than in person because an exchange of words is much safer than someone getting angry and stalking you. Besides WTF does that have to do with my opinion of your book?

    ReplyDelete
  62. 6.( I dont expect everyone to like the book but perhaps before slagging a book off a redear should make an informed decision by reading reviews of other people who have actually read it LOL and not just take some word from some person who has nothing better to do than email back and forth and waste both mine and the website owners time at sociopathworld.com.)
    You mean waste your time because I didn't agree with all of your book. I did find some of it to be useful especially for research and you never had a problem emailing me back. The website owner of this site hasn't told me to fuck off and even asked me for my opinion. I really hope you didn't fill that book with as much misinformation as you've done here. Your book had a lot of potential and it wasn’t total rubbish but in my opinion which I thought I was allowed to express, there were some things I thought devalued you as an expert.
    7. But you are so correct, there's a lot I didn't but should have mentioned:
    Page 61 of your book you quote others who call sociopaths "non-humans".
    Page 185 of your book you talk about your vag and your IUD.
    Like I said before, there was a lot of good in your book but if you cannot take some criticism then I pity you. Good luck…
    Tell you what I’ll give my copy to several friends and see what they say…

    ReplyDelete
  63. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.

    ReplyDelete
  64. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.

    ReplyDelete
  65. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  66. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  67. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I enjoyed “sparing” as it were on a blog site rather than in person because an exchange of words is much safer than someone getting angry and stalking you. Besides WTF does that have to do with my opinion of your book?

    ReplyDelete
  68. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I enjoyed “sparing” as it were on a blog site rather than in person because an exchange of words is much safer than someone getting angry and stalking you. Besides WTF does that have to do with my opinion of your book?

    ReplyDelete
  69. 3. (Bet she never told mentioned she was too in her words "chickenshit" to write her own story and that she'd got a lot out of the book. Bet she didn't mention that the book says right at the beginning that the author doesn't claim to be a "guru" and that it has typos in.)
    If I ever write a book, I'd like it to be very well thought out and very professionally done and yes the typos drove me nuts, but I am a technical writer and an editor. If I ever write a book, I’ll send you a free copy and you can say whatever you want about it without me throwing a fit on a blog.
    I didn't say that you claimed to be guru, instead I said that you should be more of one if your book is going to make the claims it did on other websites. Why were you in such a hurry to publish? Was it for financial reasons? You said that you took a great deal of time off from work because of what he put you through. You even went to India to see a guru but came back and started seeing him again.
    4. (As for being found on some ""anti-sociopath" site" I am not on any anti sociopath sites as far unless someone has stuck me on there. If anything perhaps I am a bit anti victim now LOL.)
    I will bet that you asked other sites to promote your book as you did the person who runs this site. I was asked to give my opinion and I did. You may be promoting the “anti-victim” attitude now, but you most certainly did not in your book.
    5. (Bet she didn't mention she likes winding people up on blogs.)
    You told me to be careful of the people on this site and I was referring to getting into it with someone on this site because they like you, I might add, got pissed off because I didn't agree with their opinion. I enjoyed “sparing” as it were on a blog site rather than in person because an exchange of words is much safer than someone getting angry and stalking you. Besides WTF does that have to do with my opinion of your book?

    ReplyDelete
  70. Grace, you might want to change your son's account.

    ReplyDelete
  71. i think like a sociopath and have similar abilities, but feel like an empath. what does that make me?

    I think it probably just makes you more intelligent and self-aware than most.

    if sociopath is a label for a disorder, isn't it logical then that empath is too (at least the way it's used here)?

    Excellent and very valid point. Especially if you consider to true meaning of "empath". Because it can cause social problems for them as well as the people around them.

    i don't believe in personality disorders, just personalities, where each of us is a unique mix of what life throws at us and how we cope. all special snowflakes.

    Right there with you.

    ReplyDelete
  72. No worries, Zoe. I'm not a stalker, and even if I was I have no interest in Grace beyond her being fun. :)

    And I like to see people's interpretations of Spinoza.

    ReplyDelete
  73. Yes, Grace, you should have an anonymously-named gmail account for things like this.

    And I say gmail because I believe that is the only web-based email service that I know of that does not send IP information along with an email message.

    ReplyDelete
  74. PMS (sorry, it's sticking), there is also the issue that this is a public site. With probably many nutty/creepy/fucked up lurkers.

    I know ME doesn't like to intervene in the comments, but hopefully he can delete that post.

    ReplyDelete
  75. yeah i meant because it's a public site.

    ReplyDelete
  76. Thank you Zoe. I didn't even think about it. I'll have to set up one of those accounts that Medusa mentioned. We don't use that account for anything anyway..we have so many. I probably have a gmail account and forgot. How can these comments get deleted anyway?

    Grace

    ReplyDelete
  77. Grace, maybe just email ME and ask.

    ReplyDelete
  78. That's what I did Aerianne. Thanks.

    Grace.

    ReplyDelete
  79. PostmodernSociopath said...
    No worries, Zoe. I'm not a stalker, and even if I was I have no interest in Grace beyond her being fun. :)


    how do you define fun, Postmodern? ;)

    but i wasn't thinking of you, or your interest in Grace. it's a public site and you just don't know who's lurking.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Medusa said...
    I think it probably just makes you more intelligent and self-aware than most.


    my ego would like to be your best friend, Medusa. :)

    if i'm so more self-aware than most it's probably only because of all the struggling and wondering over why i don't fit into any pre-defined mould. how comfortable it must be for the people who identify completely with one stereotype or another, to have that instant identity. no need for self-awareness, for the world has already created you. if there is more, there can't be much of it so what there is gets to sleep.

    in this respect, the empaths and sociopaths seem the same to me. equally mysterious. i mean, that any human being could feel such a perfect fit with only an idea or concept (of who they are) that they are satisfied to wear only that label and look no further... that blows me away.

    and i feel bitter ;)

    ReplyDelete
  81. “no need for self-awareness, for the world has already created you… any human being could feel such a perfect fit with only an idea or concept (of who they are) that they are satisfied to wear only that label and look no further... that blows me away.”

    I couldn’t agree more Zoe.

    and i feel bitter ;)

    They have something that you don't have: an easy pass to conformityville. You have something they don't know they are missing: the opportunity for authentic self determination.

    ReplyDelete
  82. That I've found a convenient label doesn't preclude my looking any deeper. My opinions on complacency and personal stagnation are well known. We all have our little nuances, and while I certainly think there are many who revel in the title (be they sociopath or empath), I wouldn't count myself among them. It requires a capacity for self-delusion that I've worked very hard to drum out of my daily life.

    ReplyDelete
  83. @Medusa War is a fundamental aspect of being alive. It's how we decide who gets what on the table. We don't always win, but we always have to contest when the option to contest is available.

    This means if the option is not available you shouldn't contest. In a situation where someone is your equal, and you have equal odds of winning, you should contest. Unless somehow you lose by winning.

    I recognize that I cannot win every battle, and that I cannot contest every adversary as some are just far too powerful (cost outweigh benefit), but when they equals and the cost does not outweigh the benefit,
    if you just give them a win, then the next person will see that and expect you to give them a win also, and the next thing you know you are surrounded by predators.

    ReplyDelete
  84. I have a very easy way to stop being a victim to a sociopath - disengage - he/she will lose interest very quickly if they cant run their "game", MY AHA MOMENT, when i could put a name to his behavior, i thought i was crazy, and he was the one that paid 100k for hookers and i caught him on his birthday with another woman, he stole, he cheated he lied and it all made no sense because, we were the perfect couple, everyone thought he adored and worshipped me...then voila' when i kept pulling the layers back and uncovering the lies, cause i am a persistent little spy, boom he was done, he said, what was the line, this changes everything, this changes my whole world...Boy was i crushed, destroyed, heartbroken and confused, they CONFUSE YOU, but you watch their actions, their actions, not their words..that tells you everything you need to know and it will always be your fault, not matter what they did, it's still your fault...Love the sociopath, gotta love em, they do stick to their "game"...then poof, when you disengage, pull the curtain back from the wizard of oz, they must go find their next victim...BUT YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE NO CONTACT..cause they are charming when they want something..

    ReplyDelete
  85. Dunwithhim. Most of what you just said is *yawn* around these parts, just a warning.

    However,

    ...but you watch their actions, their actions, not their words..that tells you everything you need to know....

    Very true. True for everyone, not just sociopaths.

    Some sociopaths, however, can be very clever...

    ReplyDelete

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