Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Gaslighting or cognitive distortion?

From a reader:

i am in a 7 year long relationship with a sociopath. he does not call himself a sociopath, but does joyfully brag that he is a full on crazy person & that it will be the reason he will be a millionaire, world leader, famous etc. he is very controlling and emotionally abusive, but also tries his best to be kind to me and show positive emotions. i will not be leaving him as most would suggest i do. i own that i am in an unhealthy relationship, and that i will feel more pain from leaving him than i will from staying with him. we both work to be happy as hard as it is. we argue a lot which is expected when a sane person is trying to have a successful loving life with a crazy person. the arguments stem from his cruelty, dishonesty, drunken blackouts to the smallest nothing that i can't even believe it caused an argument. one thing is constant though, every argument turns him vicious. screaming, threatening, punching holes in walls, breaking up with me (with no intention to do so) the works. he will say and do things, then a moment later, vehemently denies having said or done these things and calling me delusional or a lier. he seems so convinced that these things did not happen or were not said, he acts offended and hurt and very angry that i would accuse him of these things. possibly because he's said them in heated un warranted anger, then realizes how crazy or cruel he sounded and is embarrassed. i don't know the reason, but its surely not that he doesn't remember these things, he knows they happened. it is impossible to resolve an issue when the whole discussion turns into me working like hell to get him to admit what has just happened. knowing that they happened and that he is trying unsuccessfully to manipulate me does not resolve anything. many women in abusive relationships roll up in a ball and submit. that would reduce the frequency of the disagreements. however i do not do that. i fight for myself and what is true, and how i should be treated in a certain way. i definitely match him in battle, though its exhausting and feels foolish to entertain.

 i really am striving to have a productive situation that i can live with and be happy. this can not happen if i can't find a way around the habitual gas lighting. any advice would be appreciated.

M.E.:

It actually doesn't sound like he is gaslighting you so much as that he is delusional. He doesn't sound self-aware. A lot of people with personality disorders suffer from a belief that their reality is objective Reality, their truth is objective Truth, no matter what evidence to the contrary is presented to them. There's someone like this in my own life. For him, he doesn't believe that he creates reality per se, or that he controls reality in any way. He actually believes that there's an objective reality that he cannot control and that everybody's experience of reality is different, but he believes that his experience of reality, for whatever reason, happens to be unfailingly accurate to the objective reality. (I feel like this belief is also related in an odd habit of his to believe that he is not making choices in his life, but that he is just fulfilling a predestined course of action in direct reaction to things he has no control over. Conveniently, this means that he is also not responsible for anything he does, because he is never able to choose any other choice then the one he chose. The logic is very Sam Harris to the illogical extreme with a side of hindsight bias -- i.e. if he is the person he is, and if the person he is had a mind that naturally thought the thoughts that naturally led to that particular action, it must be that he had no other option or choice but to engage in that action. This link calls this an external control fallacy.)

But all people with personality disorders often (always?) suffer from cognitive distortions (I do too, of course because I am personality disordered, although I have gotten a lot more aware of it and consequently hopefully better). See this link for common examples of reality distortion, also here. The problem with this particular trait in a relationship is that it can have the same effect as gaslighting because this stuff is truly through-the-looking-glass crazy making. You will feel like you're losing your mind because your boyfriend's reality is so different from what you perceive to be reality and he is so insistent about it being true. I think that being in this type of situation could make anybody crazy, and it certainly historically has made plenty of people crazy. I myself feel like I have taken a small detour to crazy town when I talk to people who present with this trait. Sometimes it is particularly maddening, e.g. when the person says things about me, my profession, my philosophical or spiritual beliefs, or other things that I identify more closely with than others. I doubt that you'll be able to handle this constant onslaught to your sanity without incurring significant damage to your psyche or without intensive therapy. For something related, you could look up videos or writings about verbal abuse, which has a similar effect on people.

And further thoughts for the blog audience:

This issue is particularly relevant right now because I've been seeing a lot of this on here recently. It's a variation of what I tweeted recently -- there are a lot of uses for reason, but changing people's cognitive distortions is not one of them. I have tried a million times to reason with people in my life who suffer from cognitive distortions, but I have never been successful. All I have seen work is extensive therapy by someone incredibly qualified who is somehow able to teach them to first recognize that they aren't happy with the way they deal with the world, second want to figure out if there's something they could be doing better, third identify specific patterns of negative beliefs (i.e. cognitive distortions) in their life, fourth get them to consistently detect instances in which they do this, and possibly finally (and by this time they probably don't even need it because they've already reached the right conclusions themselves) -- reason.

The person I know with the belief that he is the only one consistently seeing reality for what it is just recently confessed to me that he now recognizes that just because he feels something doesn't mean that his feeling necessarily reflects reality. (The first link calls this "emotional reasoning": "We believe that what we feel must be true automatically. . . You assume that your unhealthy emotions reflect he way things really are — 'I feel it, therefore it must be true.'".) Wow, that's amazing. If he can get there, there's hope for everyone, but not likely via well-meaning others trying to show them the error of their ways by trying to rationalize with them.

Why is it that we can pass by someone crazy on the street or on a bus or train and just mentally give them a pass but the seemingly normal people with cognitive distortions drive up our blood pressure and drive us crazy too? Maybe because the crazy person is obviously crazy, so we just write off their crazymaking behavior without internalizing any of it. But the more you learn to recognize cognitive distortions in others, the more they become obviously crazy too, which hopefully leads to less craziness in you. 

57 comments:

  1. "Reason has its uses - changing personal beliefs is not one of them.", was the tweet.

    I think that people with those cognitive distortions that we have difficulty with showing them how to look outside of their box lack a certain amount of cognitive empathy I think; being shut in the box of their perception of reality they fail to be aware of the emotional realities of others. It'll remain a problem until they become self aware enough to seek help, shut in the boxed reality of their delusions.

    ReplyDelete
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  2. the blogger states that she tried a lot of times to help her relatives to recognise their cognitive distortions ( specific negative patterns of cognitive beliefs).
    My question is :why she things that she is right when she defines the specific patterns of cognitive beliefs of somebody else as cognitive distortion? how she can be sure that what she believes about their thinking patterns is not a cognitive distortion of hers actually ? i wonder who is the objective one to define what a cognitive distortion is and in which context.
    I could accept something as objective cognitive distortion when the actualisation of a certain thinking pattern has obvious negative consequenses in person's life which render the individual miserable and he/her is aware of this misery or ( and most important) if such an actualisation harms other people and society. Of course i exclude medical conditions and psychosis.

    If this is not the case why to claim something a cognitive distortion ? who can represent the absolute good standard for the ideal cognitive function?

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    Replies
    1. Nana, your keep writing "recognize" with the "s". :D
      Leaving is not the same thing as hiding. ;)

      Delete
    2. "If this is not the case why to claim something a cognitive distortion ? who can represent the absolute good standard for the ideal cognitive function?"

      My thought is that people generally will try to help others that they feel are thinking in the wrong way. Much like Christians will try to proselytize sinners. The difficulty perhaps is in claiming that one is correct and one is incorrect, whereas, perhaps, and I could be incorrect about this, they're both circling the correct answer, but are on both sides of it, instead of utilizing it together in order to create one whole truth.
      I've worked with folks with personality disorders for awhile and I feel (perhaps incorrectly) that they have probably just as many cognitive distortions as the people are who trying to help them by using force. Force does not make a friend to those with personality disorders or to those who those with personality disorders are fighting against. The only thing that it does is to drive a wedge, where (I assume...) one of the intentions in defending one's point against the opposition is to do something good (speak to your truth, defend someone deemed defenseless, etc, etc) Which also leads me to think perhaps that people (in general) are trying to do good and well until they become frustrated and do something out of hate. Which happens on both sides.

      Delete
    3. As soon as I stopped trying to fix my daughter ie make me right her wrong and start loving and supporting her where she was at she started to heal herself <3

      Delete
  3. "Why is it that we can pass by someone crazy on the street or on a bus or train and just mentally give them a pass but the seemingly normal people with cognitive distortions drive up our blood pressure and drive us crazy too?"

    Really good point. And very true that the 'gaslighting effect' can be just as often unintended as intentional, when the product of natural/inherent distortions. Reality is infinitely more subtle than our cruder reactions/emotions feel it to be.

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  4. Reality is infinitely more subtle - and ultimately understandable - than our cruder reactions/emotions feel it to be.

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  5. Firstly: I think it's possible that the woman who wrote to M.E. is the delusional / psychopathic one who's messing up her husband's mind. His "symptoms" are getting angry, calling her delusional or a liar, and hitting walls. Fits perfectly if he loves his wife but can't stand it when she subtly screws his mind and then pretends like she never said a thing. At least he's not hitting her. Just a thought - maybe he IS crazy and not her.

    "i wonder who is the objective one to define what a cognitive distortion is and in which context."

    This is the most important question which covers everything M.E. wrote. Address this question and you solve baseless mysteries which plague most people's minds their whole lives. What makes any "disorder" a disorder? What is a cognitive distortion? Psychologists apply disorder to any variation which is 1) in the minority, 2) apparently has some detrimental affect on an individual. On the face of it it sounds reasonable and I believed this for the past 6 years. Here's the problem:

    What the majority does is not necessariky objectively true, or ideal for society, or beneficial even for the individual in the long run. Next, if you're in a tiny minority that does want to or cannot participate, you're more likely to be alienated, lonely and shunned thus leading to a higher potential for depression, inattention, disillusion, disassociation etc. Well now you're a minority and not mentally healthy but does that mean you're "cognitively distorted"?

    Perfect example is homosexuality: by the exact same reasoning by which we call ADHD a disorder we called homosexuality a disorder until the 70s. When enough people started to say "no its not a disorder" we changed our mind. Literally nothing else changed. Note that homosexuals were - and are - more likely to have mental health issues. For most it's obvious why: social isolation and inner turmoil being a shunned minority. So now here comes a psychologist saying "It's a tiny minority and they're not happy it must be a disorder."

    Reason alone is not enough I agree. We MUST account for the spiritual health of the society and individuals alike. Only that which accomplishes both individual prosperity & societal prosperity is as close to "objective truth" as possible.

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  7. "i wonder who is the objective one to define what a cognitive distortion is and in which context."

    A sticky wicket. Who indeed. That's one reason there are 12 members who must jointly pick apart the evidence and hopefully come to agreement. Do pigs fly? How about airplanes? When people brainstorm together to find the 'right' answer, they often do. Especially in matters of science, and so on.

    The rest, as in psychoanalysis and religion, is pure concoction: What makes a person normal? Where does normal end and disorder begin? Is there a God? Does this Great It enjoy Itself when I'm playing poker?

    Both psychoanalytic diagnosis and religion spark many questions and mysteries.

    Does any of this really matter, in the moment to moment of how I live my life, whilst in the grip of 'crashing into' others? (North's crashing quip)

    I don't know. I like to play around with these ideas without being swallowed up by the Psychiatric Legion, by it's faux-officious minions and their labels, drugs, etc.
    As to neurological indications thus far:

    http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2012/jul/02/bankers-greed-brain-changes

    Of course the opposite must be true when the brain of neuro-typical is under the influence of mob mentality, I.e., 'emotional reasoning.'

    Mr. Hyde

    ReplyDelete
  8. "that's one reason there's 12 jury members"

    "the brain of a neuro-typical"

    Groupmind isn't always bad; many minds can see a world in a grain of san. The Hive mind buzzes. Hence flows the honey.

    Mr. Hyde

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    Replies
    1. Interesting point, and I think, if you're saying what I feel like you may be saying I would agree. Structure, society, uniformity, they serve a purpose. They aren't for everyone, and I think specifically work better for people who's fear sensors are in working order (over working even?) in order to give a sense of structure and stability, in a somewhat chaotic world. The problem with the structure is that it alienates otherwise good people who don't believe in the structure. Which I don't think there's anything wrong with believing (or not believing) in the structure.

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  9. My apologies I know this is not related to the post above but since Muhammad has been so vehemently and injustly caricatured here on this blog (and beyond) without anyone (myself included) having mentioned him at all, I thought I should direct sincerely interested readers to one his most famous english biographies. It is written by Martin Lings who was a British Sharespearean scholar who converted to Islam. The wiki article for the book is below. Trust me you'll enjoy the read and learn about one of the most - if not the most - influential man in history. After listening to the Republican debate yesterday, I think all Americans who are even remotely tuned in to everything that's happening owe it to themselves to know who Muhammad was and what his message was.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muhammad:_His_Life_Based_on_the_Earliest_Sources


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  10. You mean the influential man who raped his nine-year-old "wife"? Sounds like a must-read to me! Any other recommendations?

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    1. He wasn't so bad. According to Cracked, he put a stop to the practice of "wa'ada" which means "to bury one's infant daughter alive". Of course he probably did this so he could rape them later when they were 9 or so.


      http://www.cracked.com/article_23248_6-foreign-words-so-dark-there-are-no-english-equivalents_p2.html

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    2. Interesting that our resident jihadist REFUSES to address any of these biographical tidbits about his child-rapist prophet. I would love to know how he explains to himself.
      Or maybe he doesn't need to explain it to himself because he condones this behaviour.

      Delete
    3. I've already addressed a month ago. I just refuse to do so again and again when the questioners are obviously engaging in frivolity and slander.

      Get serious and people treat you seriously.

      Delete
    4. So you consider child sex abuse a frivolous topic lacking in seriousness. I guess that answers my question.
      Same goes for the genital mutilation of young girls known as female 'circumcision,' I assume?

      Delete
    5. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9aC7bUTBKv0

      I saw her ted talk on the Quran a year ago and found it intriguing considering she's a Jew but didn't think too much of it (was an atheist).

      Delete
    6. Stop prevaricating and answer the question.

      Delete
  11. https://m.soundcloud.com/leagueoflegends/get-jinxed

    This song never fails to get me revved up for some antisocial hijinks.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Once again apologies this is not directly related to the post but it does build on previous conversations. One thing I noticed for years and the whole time I've been here but have not addressed directly is: it seems that there are some sociopaths / psychopaths / narcissists who genuinely do not believe that another person can actually care as much about someone else as I claim to. They seem to genuinely not believe you when you say that you have NO desire for revenge for past wrongs done to you. They seem to genuinely not believe you when you say that you just want them to acknowledge it so 1) we get closure, 2) it kind of gives us a little more hope in humanity (it's scary to think people can be THAT callous). In essence, while they understand they are different and understand what empathy is and how it works, they remain ignorant about how empaths works. BTW not all "empaths" are the same. Some don't forgive. Some forgive after a while. Some forgive too easily. Etc etc. The point is we are NOT like you. Just imagine how you'd behave in a given situation - we are the exact opposite.

    I mentioned this because the latest message in the previous post once again insisted that I was somehow here to get "revenge." Apart from the fact that it is an absurd and incredibly stupid analysis of my efforts here (I mean seriously, if I wanted revenge, they would KNOW it - lucky for them they just happen to be people who I have no desire to seek revenge from, even if I was devastated), it once again hints their utter ignorance of how ethical people think. Just an observation - I don't know and it could well be that they DO know but just keep lying to confuse people.

    Thank you.

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  13. 1. Every single post, whether a relates to your religion or not, you always end up pushing your insane beliefs on everyone else here. You are the one who has a distortion on reality; if you think that any rational person will follow someone who thought that raping young girls is a good thing or condones killing those who don't submit.

    2. It seems to me like the woman in this relationship has bad judgment and a weak grasp on reality as well. She thinks that her life would not be as happy without him, if in fact he is verbally abusive and as horrible as she says, than she would be much happier without him. If he will not change and she will not leave. What is the point of getting advice on weather he is gaslighting or not? No matter what M.E. was going to say, nothing would have changed.

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  14. They want a reaction. Deny them the reaction. It's only making you crazy because you let it.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, narcissists certainly like to bask in the attention, feel an inflation of their own egos, and satisfying their pursuit of social dominance by belittling others. It's born from their own self resentment and bitterness for their sense of powerlessness to personally turn their deep internal insecurities into the strength they need to better themselves.

      If you ever watched the anime "Another", an effective way to cut off Jonaid would be to treat him like he doesn't exist, just like how the students and staff in "Another" needed to pretend an individual ceased to exist for the sake of the survival of everyone else. It'll starve him of the attention he seeks, and consequently he'll have to cave in and seek to change his maladaptive personality or leave.

      Delete
    2. I loved Another, it was such a great show.

      And yeah, totally right about ignoring certain people, I think it's the only way to handle things.

      Delete
    3. Comment was for OP, but works for everyone ;) Haven't seen "Another".

      Delete
  15. Thank you for these. It just confirms what I thought was the case: psychos do know that we genuinely care they just don't give a damn. Rather they take more advantage from knowing so.

    Had to re-confirm. I'm a "weak" empath.

    Thanks.

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  16. I think some sociopaths hate empathy and emotional vulnerability because they are - deep down - VERY emotional themselves. They see it as a weakness and try to - consciously or susconsciousky - hide it by becoming indifferent. Once you're callous and have hurt others, now you have even more grounds for remaining as such because it must hurt a lot to think about what the pain you might have caused others.

    I'll tell you more than anything else what we - extreme empaths like myself - love about such people is their true capacity for empathy and emotions. We see what you consider to be a "weakness" to be discarded at all cost and we admire it, we respect it, we love it and we gain strength from it. It's also why you're so good at manipulating - most people like your ACTUAL qualities but you don't so you use them for ulterior agendas. I guess that is another reason why empaths feel betrayed as opposed to just having made a mistake. Mistake is misjudging a person. You don't always fool us - sometimes we knowingly shoot ourselves because we love what you hate about yourselves.

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  17. And it explains perfectly why you want "power." Your self-hatred is detrimental to yourselves and far more so to others. Get over it you're only weak if you sell yourself.

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  18. Hi, is anybody I know here? Happy New Year guys...

    What if this guy really is unaware of some of his subpersonalities? We all are on a spectrum as far as dissociative identity disorder goes. Aren't we? I mean, not only on thsi site in our day to day lives as well.

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  19. Hm? Psychopaths are often very emotional people, about themselves. This is no news. This is also the reason many psychopaths respond "over the top" for some imagined insult. Very sensitive, about themselves. But it stops there. Anybody thinking that these emotions "spill over" to other people should rethink. Psychos see no need to be careful with words around other people & gets puzzled when their rude talk offends others (the psycho blames this on others, as "over reactions").

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  20. You're describing narcissism more so than psychopathy.

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  27. Marriage restoration..
    I lost my husband to another woman 2 weeks ago after 27 years of marriage . We had a lovely marriage but he started a relationship with a co worker who chased after him . He is living away near his work and her and refuses to talk to me or to come home . I am devastated and am finding it hard to cope . I wish I did not love him and that I could move on but I can't . I don't know how to stop feeling like this I wish I didn't as its eating me away and I m starting to feel ill. I have degraded myself begging him to come home all to no avail. I became very worried and needed help. As I was browsing through the internet one day, I came across a website that suggested that Dr Frank Ojo can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he did a spell for me. tow days later, my husband came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my family are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr Frank Ojo . If you need a spell caster that can cast a spell that truly works, I suggest you contact him. He will not disappoint you. if you have any problem contact him, I give you 100% guarantee that he will help you, This is his details, E-mail: Templeofloveandprosperity@gmail.com , Web site: http://lovespell2.yolasite.com . Mobile number +2348072370762. Thank you all for reading.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Glorious be Unto Dr Ukaka the great man and ever, my name is Sarah from Florida city usa. since 1 and a half year I have witness what is called heart broken. my boyfriend that promised me marriage failed me and impregnate me and leave,he dump me,he stop calling" he stop picking my calls,and he no longer respond to me. I have be looking for solution,I fall into the hands of fake spell caster,they rough me off and took my money without help.I have cried,I have weep"and tears runs out of eyes. The silentness in my heart brought me to the deepest path of failure that I lost my job. Crying all day,because of my life was lonely. So thanks to Ukaka that came into my life and brought me the greatest joy that was lost. I saw his mail while browsing and I contact and tell him what I am passing through with no doubt because what saw about him,was enough to believe. And I was given words of solution on what to do. I can't really help thinking about it I have tried to see what I can do, I manage to provide him some materials and he help me with the rest,after casting the spell, 12hrs later he came with rose on his hand and I was even about going out,i saw him in front of my door when he sees me he knee and said he is dying I should forgive him and accept him back he was crying,I can't wait to let him finish I quickly crab him and kiss him, just then" he said he is restless without me, just as the prophet has said he will be. He brought out a ring and put it on my hand. Our wedding day was scheduled,1week after we got married. today makes it 2weeks and we are living happily I don't know how to praise him enough, he has done me a thing I can never forget. And I can't really share to myself alone, I want y'all to help me praise him because if it is wasn't for him I already plan of committing suicide. But right now I am now so happy more than I was before. And you out there crying for help you've already got one,Ukaka is the man that you need in all rampart. contact his address if you need his service, freedomlovespell@hotmail.com also contact him on his web site: freedomlovespelltemple.yolasite.com

    ReplyDelete
  29. How i got my boyfriend back.My name is Stacey Bruno.I never believed in love spells or magic until I met this spell caster once when i went to see my friend in Indian this year on a business summit. I meant a man who's name is Dr ATILA he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one's gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I'm now happy %26 a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 5 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 3years. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and he had no good paying job. So when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. And in 7 days when i returned to Canada, my boyfriend (now husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn't believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better. His email is atilahealinghome@yahoo.com

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  30. ý tưởng tô điểm cho phép thử nghiệm và đem lại cho vật dụng trong nhà nhà sự bất ngờ và nét riêng biệt. Đó là một thời điểm tốt để biến giấc mơ bạn đã ấp ủ bao lâu nay biến thành hiện thực. Hôm nay bạn có thể trang tri noi that căn nhà của bạn bằng cách thêm ghe sofa bố trí có một không hai, phản ánh ước mơ của bạn. sat my thuat bộ sưu tập của các sáng kiến tiên tiến cho bức tường trống sẽ giúp chọn bí quyết tốt nhất cho đồ đạc chung cư của bạn và phân phối cho nguồn thú vui lý tưởng cho những dự án trang trí. do go phong khach , do go nha bep , do go phong ngu , giúp diện tích sống cập nhật một cách nhanh chóng. Một lớp sơn mới sáng trên bức tường của bạn hoặc bông hoa đẹp trên nền phá cách là các ý tưởng trang trí tường hoàn hảo và phản ánh các xu thế mới nhất. Bức tường không phải chỉ là một màu đồng điệu. Ngoài ra còn có phần lớn các loại khoa học trang trí bạn có thể thử trên những bức tường trống rỗng của bạn như gia cong sat , gia cong inox , bang hieu , logo , poster , gian hang hoi cho , cong chao su kien , su kien quang cao

    ReplyDelete
  31. More people need to be on http://sociopath-community.com/

    !!! it used to be connected to this blog but was disconnected over a year ago. We need fresh blood and lots of interesting things have happened recently (relates to kiwifar.ms drama: https://archive.is/M2tXa) that will go down in the forum's history! Be sure to check out http://www.psychforums.com/antisocial-personality/ too, as some of its regulars are regulars on SC too!

    ReplyDelete
  32. My life became devastated when my husband sent me packing, after 8 years that we have been together. I was lost and helpless after trying so many ways to make my husband take me back. One day at work, i was absent minded not knowing that my boss was calling me, so he sat and asked me what its was all about i told him and he smiled and said that it was not a problem. I never understand what he meant by it wasn't a problem getting my husband back, he said he used a spell to get his wife back when she left him for another man and now they are together till date and at first i was shocked hearing such thing from my boss. He gave me an email address of the great spell caster who helped him get his wife back, i never believed this would work but i had no choice that to get in contact with the spell caster which i did, and he requested for my information and that of my husband to enable him cast the spell and i sent him the details, but after two days, my mom called me that my husband came pleading that he wants me back, i never believed it because it was just like a dream and i had to rush down to my mothers place and to my greatest surprise, my husband was kneeling before me pleading for forgiveness that he wants me and the kid back home, then i gave Happy a call regarding sudden change of my husband and he made it clear to me that my husband will love me till the end of the world, that he will never leave my sight. Now me and my husband is back together again and has started doing pleasant things he hasn't done before, he makes me happy and do what he is suppose to do as a man without nagging. Please if you need help of any kind, kindly contact Happy for help and you can reach him via email: happylovespell2@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  33. "" HOW I GOT MY EX BOYFRIEND BACK""

    I want to use this great medium to thank LORD MASUKA for helping me to get my boyfriend back after he dumped me for 3 months .My boyfriend breakup with me because he see another girl at his church and told me he is no longer want me and live me in pain and heart break.I seek for help on the internet and i saw so many good talk about this great spell caster LORD MASUKA of lordmasukaspelltemple@hotmail.com and i contacted him also and explain my problems to him and he cast a love spell for me which i use to get back my boyfriend within the period of 3 days and i am so grateful to him for the good work he has done for me,that is why i also want to let everyone who is in need of help out there to also seek help from him so he can help.His email is lordmasukaspelltemple@hotmail.com or call +2347053105287 or view and contact him on his website:
    http://lordmasukaspelltem.wix.com/lordmasuka
    You can contact for any kind of help and he will help you. And you can also reach him on facebook Harry Masuka or Skype Lord masuka


    ReplyDelete
  34. Shocking amazing testimony by Tom Bush

    O.M.G!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 20TH OF JUNE 2015, And i saw a marvelous testimony of this powerful and great spell caster called Baba Agba on the forum..I never believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about spells before.. Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not until Baba Agba did it for me and restored my marriage of 8 years back to me and brought my wife back to me in just 17hours just as i read on the internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my wife knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept her back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don't know how much to convey my appreciation to you Baba Agba you are a God sent to me and my entire family.. And now i am a joyful man once again.. here is his Email: babaagbasolutiontemple@gmail.com OR CALL +2347064348663....Tom Bush from England(UK)....

    ReplyDelete
  35. Shocking amazing testimony by Tom Bush

    O.M.G!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 20TH OF JUNE 2015, And i saw a marvelous testimony of this powerful and great spell caster called Baba Agba on the forum..I never believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about spells before.. Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not until Baba Agba did it for me and restored my marriage of 8 years back to me and brought my wife back to me in just 17hours just as i read on the internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my wife knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept her back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don't know how much to convey my appreciation to you Baba Agba you are a God sent to me and my entire family.. And now i am a joyful man once again.. here is his Email: babaagbasolutiontemple@gmail.com OR CALL +2347064348663....Tom Bush from England(UK)....

    ReplyDelete
  36. hello world,my name is Melody Lisa i am from Netherlands i never believe in spell or idols untill i have a family problem about bearing children.me and husband we got married since 2003 no children and pregnant to show if i even have a womb to bear children we went to hospital Doctor said that i can"t give birth.in 2009 i was browsing scrolling down i saw a testimony someone tesfying about dr Abiodu saying that dr Abiodu thank you for bring my husband back to me,with the gmail address i saw about him i copied it(drabiodutemple@gmail.com)i contacted him and explained my problem to him he said to me my daughter you don"t have any problem that my problem it a small case to battle with.he now told me that i will pay for items i said no problem and paid,he now prepared an oil for me said i should apply the oil with my cream and then make love with my husband which i did a month later my dr confirmed that i am 3 week pregnant now i have 3 kids me and my family are now liveing happy.thanks to Dr Abiodu for making me mothers not barreness.if have any problem here his gmail.....drabiodutemple@gmail.com or call him +2349051376613.
    He cast any of the spell
    HIV/AIDS
    Do you need a divorce ?
    Do you want your ex lover back?
    Do you want to get pregnant?
    Do you your business to grow excessively?
    Do you need a husband?
    Do you have problem in your marriage life?
    do you want to win lottery or win a court case?
    drabiodutemple@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  37. My husband broke up with me last week, i was so frustrated and i could not know what next to do again, i love my husband so much but he was cheating on me with another woman and this makes him broke up with me so that he can be able to get marry to the other lady and this lady i think use witchcraft on my husband to make him hate me and my kids and this was so critical and uncalled-for,I cry all day and night for God to send me a helper to get back my man until i went to NY to see a friend and who was having the same problem with me but she latter got her Husband back and i asked her how she was able to get her husband back and she told me that their was a powerful spell caster in Africa name Dr.Unity that he help with love spell in getting back lost lover back and i decided to contacted the same Dr.Unity and he told me what is needed to be done for me to have my man back and i did it although i doubted it but i did it and the Dr told me that i will get the result after 48hours, and he told me that my husband was going to call me by 9pm in my time and i still doubted his word, to my surprise my husband really called me and told me that he miss me so much, Oh My God i was so happy, and today i am happy with my man again and we are joyfully living together as one good family and i thank the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity of Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that good spell casters still exist and Dr.Unity is one of the good spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are there and your lover is turning you down, or you have your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore contact the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity on his email: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com .if you have any problem contact Dr.Unity, i give you 100% guarantee that he will help you. Thank you sooooo much!!!


    1. GETTING YOUR EX LOVER BACK.
    2. WINNING LOTTERIES.
    3. CHILD BEARING.
    4. BREAKING OF GENERATION COURSE.
    5. GETTING OF JOB.
    6. JOB PROMOTION.
    7. MONEY SPELL.
    8. SPIRITUAL PROTECTION.
    9. HERBAL CARE.
    10. BEAUTY SPELL.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Hello friends i am very happy for the wonderful work lord masuka whose email is lordmasukaspelltemple@hotmail.com has done for me i got married to my lovely husband last year February and we have a lovely son. things was going well with us and we were living happily, until one day my husband started behaving in a strange manner i could not understand, i was very confused with the way he treats me and my son. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was sad and also frustrated i did not know what to do,i was sick for more than a week because of the divorce. i love him so much he his everything to me without him my life is nothing. i told one of my child hood friend and she told me to contact a spell caster that she has listen to one woman who testify about lord masuka and she has been hearing about him that i should try him i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing but i just say i should try if something will come out of it. i contacted him for the return of my husband to me, he told me that my husband have been taken by another woman. that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want to divorce me. then he told me that has to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and my son, he cast the spell and after 1 day my husband came back home and started apologizing he said that he love me so much that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that lord masuka cast on him that make him come back to me,right now am so happy again. thank you lord masuka for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. this is to every one who is facing divorces or heart break by your lover i want you to contact him now because he can do it for you his powers is great and dont have any side effect in the future contact him through his Email: lordmasukaspelltemple@hotmail.com or lordmasukaspellhome711@gmail.com You can visit his website http://lordmasukaspelltem.wix.com/lordmasuka for more details about him or call him +2347053105287. You can also add him on facebook Harry Masuka or Skype lord masuka. contact him now and your problems will be solve for ever.once again thanks to LORD MASUKA.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Shocking amazing testimony by Tom Bush

      O.M.G!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony..I visited a forum here on the internet on the 20TH OF JUNE 2015, And i saw a marvelous testimony of this powerful and great spell caster called Baba Agba on the forum..I never believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about spells before.. Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, not until Baba Agba did it for me and restored my marriage of 8 years back to me and brought my wife back to me in just 17hours just as i read on the internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my wife knelt down begging for forgiveness and for me to accept her back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don't know how much to convey my appreciation to you Baba Agba you are a God sent to me and my entire family.. And now i am a joyful man once again.. here is his Email: babaagbasolutiontemple@gmail.com OR CALL +2347064348663....Tom Bush from England(UK)....

      Delete
  39. This is a very joyful day of my life because of the help Dr.Trust has rendered to me by helping me get my ex husband back with his love spell. i was married for 6 years and it was so terrible because my husband was really cheating on me and was seeking for a divorce but when i came across Dr.Trust email address on the internet i explained my situation to him and then seek his help but to my greatest surprise he told me that he will help me with my case and here i am now celebrating because my Husband has change totally for good. He always want to be by me and can not do anything without my present. i am really enjoying my marriage, what a great celebration. i will keep on testifying on the internet because DR.trust is truly a real spell caster. DO YOU NEED HELP THEN CONTACT Dr.Trust NOW VIA EMAIL: Ultimatespellcast@yahoo.com or Ultimatespellcast@gmail.com or call him on +2348156885231 his via website http://ultimatespellcast8.wix.com/ultimatespellcast

    ReplyDelete

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