Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Sociopath or what?

From a reader:

Hello. 

I really have no idea of where to start. I've Always felt different from everyone else and ive Always known that there was something wrong with me. I think i might be a sociopath. When i was a small child, i used to beat up everyone. Ive Always had all this violence built up inside even though when i was small i never got physically or verbal abused. I was that little bully that everyone feared yet everyone loved, till this day. Even though i got bullied, cut myself, attempted suicide. Ive Always thought about murder, my aunt told me that when i was 5 i used to make up stories about people getting brutally murdered with chainsaws, getting tortured, then id just smile and walk away. Im not capable of feeling love. Every single time i got into a relationship id insult and make that person feel bad, hurt them. I didnt care. I never did. Ive never felt remorse. Sometimes id wake up just thinking ''i wanna fight with him''. Even when someone close to me is hurting, i dont care. I cant understand how people can feel pain when someone they love is in pain. I can't do that, i just don't care, no matter who the person is!! Some time ago my dad got mad at me cause we were having a conversation and i said ''i prefer to speak the truth no matter how hard it is. If the person kills herself, then be it. Its their problem, not mine. If they're weak then its not my fault''. 
Now im 17, ive fucked up my last relationship with a guy  i was in love with cause i kept on insulting him heavily, im very anti social, ive had problems at school for the past 2 years : Teachers calling for my behaviour, failed gr10 twice, i dropped out.  I got called ''psychopath''.  A friend of mine said ''i could tell you're a sociopath from the first day ive met you''

Looking forward to a response :) thank you!

Just as an aside, I am just as guilty of making judgments about a person's mental state and possible mental disorders based on just a few short paragraphs of self-reporting, but I sort of think it's interesting what sort of comments these elicit. I'm not sure if you can tell more about the original poster, the projections of the people commenting, or if it's a mixture or neither or what. But I also found it to be at least interesting to see other people respond to who I was via the book -- whether it was things that I thought were interesting, insightful, factually (in)accurate, not likely, etc. If you've ever wondered how quickly (and far) people would take a few salient facts about you and run with them, you should email me a quick bio for me to post to see how ready others are to give you their assessment (and with what absolute confidence, some of them). 

99 comments:

  1. Goodie, a 17 year old brat. How fascinating~

    One who can't even keep her story straight for the duration of a short letter.
    She is incapable of feeling love. Yet whines 1 minute later about how she fucked up her relationship with a guy she was in love with.

    Here's a bit of that truth she likes to dish out:
    She sounds like the typical boring, obnoxious drama queen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Same goes for this M.E person and almost all of the posters on this blog.

      Delete
    2. You Guys are complete idiots i'm a male 17 year old sociopath and i look to these blogs to show myself that there are people in this world who have the same understanding of the world around us as i do

      i've fucked up so many friendships that have spanned over 7-9 years all because i hurt their feelings the same way she did

      so you know what unless you understand how we think you should keep your shit to your selves and get stuffed

      Delete
    3. @7:32
      You never had any friends to begin with, sweet child.

      Delete
    4. Anon 7:32,

      Aww! You're right. The complexity of a 17 year old spoilt brat who wants endless attention and desperately needs to feel special, to the point that they have even alienated all their friends from 3rd grade, are beyond us mere mortals.

      I'm willing to bet good money that you go to these websites and convince yourself that you are a sociopath because it makes you feel powerful and gives you a convenient excuse for being a failure. Gives you something to try and shock mom and dad with and try to impress your classmates with.
      You're so totally hardcore.

      If a person on the internet telling you you are a silly drama queen has you that upset that you start prancing around whining about how we don't understand you...good news. You are most certainly not a sociopath. Just a sad little attention seeking failure. A wannabe bad boy.

      Delete
    5. Anon 11:52

      Yes your right it's beyond all you mere mortals, who hell do you think you are to be such a douche bag,

      What's the point of it, is it just that you find pleasure in this if you do congrats you must be on the verge of a climax.

      It's people like you that i have no problem using, you're just dead weight in a world adapting and moving on from your pathetic views on humanity so why don't you just lie down and die out like a good boy to make way for people who deserve to live in this world

      Delete
    6. You are so adorable! Like a rabid little Chihuahua.

      Grow up, you silly wannabe and stop posturing behind your computer screen.

      It's no wonder you don't have friends, the way you prance about all indignant and spouting cliches.

      You like to tell yourself you are this tough, manipulative charmer. You are just so much better than the others, more deserving to live.
      What are you going to say next, you are a big, bad wolf?

      I am more impressed by wiggers than I am by the likes of you :)

      Delete
    7. Only anons here... Too bad.
      Anon 255, 303 and 313, you gotta ask yourselves why you are reading and commenting on this site if all you see are "typical boring, obnoxious drama queen."

      Anon 232 and 210, you are showing way too much emotions and hurt feelings to be considered even remotely sociopathic. This is a good thing. A lot of people feel like they are unable to love and that they fuck up all their relationships until they are way older. Myself included.

      If you want to use the "get out of jail" free card to tell yourself that you are an asshole because you are a sociopath, go ahead. But it wont take you very far.

      Sociopaths actually work on their "deficiencies" to blend in. You seem to be doing the opposite. You are accentuating your deficiencies to prove to yourself that you are a sociopath, probably to convince yourself that you can't do anything about it.

      Delete
    8. I'm 2:55, 11:52 and 2:36.
      There is fuck all chance of me signing in just because playing the anon game confuses you :)

      One simple reason I keep reading and commenting on this site.
      It occasionally amuses me.

      Delete
    9. Seems more fun then sitting in a room by yourself and speaking to yourself in three different languages....because I have never done that....

      Delete
  2. Your wrong about M.E.! She is no "drama queen." Do you think that M.E.
    could possibly turn out the quality product she does on a daily basis and be a
    drama queen? Could she bring together the mixture of people she does on the
    blog and be a drama queen?
    The weakest aspect of the what-is-a-sociopath? argument is that there NEVER
    has been a clear cut defination of what a sociopath is, and the Hare test is now
    coming into question. For example, I know a person who would score 100%
    on the Hare test except for the glaring example that they did'nt go "bad" until
    their early 20's. They can't possibly be a "text book" sociopath. They've got to be "cluster B", but then the question becomes "Which Cluster B?" Are some
    people just lucky in evading the law until their 20's? Or is it just pure fate?
    Why can't it just be "good" people versus "evil" people, and why should evil
    people need an excuse for what they do other then the fact that they ARE evil
    people? They don't have to STAY evil people. They COULD change. But not
    without the desire and self insight to do so.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You know what's sad about this? You talk and talk about M.E. and how awesome you think she is. But you never do anything to show it.

      It's not exactly conducive to her being impressed enough to listen to you, now is it?

      Now John Hinckley Jr... he had the right idea. You want a woman like that to pay any attention to you, you have to do something big to get it.

      But there you sit, jerking yourself off and writing this shit that most people don't even bother skimming anymore.

      You want to help Jodi and M.E.? Get M.E.'s attention. Show her you are a man she must listen to.
      Otherwise you are completely worthless and have proven once and for all that you don't care about either of them.

      Delete
    2. The John Hinckley, Jr. 'idea' is not right for anyone.

      Delete
    3. Only the Paranoid SurviveDecember 9, 2014 at 3:43 PM

      "why should evil people need an excuse for what they do other then the fact that they ARE evil people?"

      Excuses are necessary to avoid punishment.
      Also, everything you write on the Internet can be traced back to you. So the best thing for you is to pretend to be good or reformed even as an anonymous troll.

      Delete
    4. Hey Paranoid, "the best thing for you is to"......Wow, you're so wise :). Does your girlfriend always "open", when you tell her "open"... The best thing about fucking processes is the little " unexpected" things that come your way too....Fun, fun, fun...

      Delete
  3. Hello,
    I think I am a sociopath. From very early age I don't care for the people. I have never felt love, guilt, remorse. Still I have something like consciousness. Sometimes, when younger, I was feeling that I don't have the feelings that other people had. I just couldn't feel like them (or so strongly like them).
    I have never felt an attachement for someone. I learned myself lying at the age of 11-12 to hide bad marks in maths (before that, I was an excellent student at all subjects). I use my friends to tell somebody what I want to tell, but I don't care about their problems. When I want to be friend with somebody, it's like a goal I try to reach. Since very young I don't like taking responsibilities, I change my interests quickly.
    Still I had experienced emotions. When I started to have the bad marks at maths, my father started to help me understanding the matery, but most of the time when I didn't understand something, he was yelling and sometimes insulting me, from which I felt really bad.
    Another example is, when my grandmother died. She died in front of my eyes. On one side, I was expecting it, because she had cancer, and I wasn't sad. But the first 15 minutes after that I cried. Then the house was full with relatives and I found that interesting. At her funeral I was forcing myself to cry, and finally I did it, thinking: "I'm crying! So I'm not a bad person!"
    And, at last, the thought of being a sociopath sometimes scares me.
    Do you think that I am a sociopath? I hope the answer is no, but...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that's how i found out i'm a socio. i found out that my feelings aren't like others, and sometimes it makes an affort for me to TRY and feel.

      Delete
    2. " When I want to be friend with somebody, it's like a goal I try to reach. " THAT'S MY SENTENCE :)) seriously, that's exactly my saying.

      Delete
    3. Am I a socio then?

      Delete
    4. it's not possible for me to know. y should know it. and y know, don't do this. don't limit yrself into the sociopath definition. just use it to know yrself better. ok? just read the articles, but don't limit yrself. cause it may keep y back. just use it to get better, to be wut y really wanna be and just keep the good things. focus on the good things that we have naturally.

      Delete
    5. Sociopath and good things? Really?

      Delete
    6. yeah!! y think i'm a bad person?!
      yes. we can be focused,smart, we can not care of wut people think and do wutever we think is ok, we do wut WE wanna do, we can be hard-core, we can be some one who won't let ANYTHING affect his work. we can be many things, we can be great.
      also, we can do good even if we don't care. we can do it because of the whole world. because of its logic. we can analyze and be very rational and being rational...seeing everything, understanding everything, can lead to be the better person.
      yes, i think of murdering and i like it and i know i can do it, yes, i do steal
      but
      i won't kill anyone, and also, i put wutever i stole back after stealing it.
      do y see?

      Delete
    7. Sounds like too cold.

      Delete
    8. Hi Anon,

      Like anything in life, it's what you do with "who you are" that makes you good or bad. I think a really great perspective on this is given by Al Dunlap - the link below is a short bit that is a good intro into the "pros and cons" if you will.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTro82HVIi0

      Delete
    9. So, if I decide to do only good things, is that making me a high-fuction socio (if I'm really a one)?

      Delete
    10. It just makes you "pro-social," which is usually easier for people to accept.

      If you can get through life doing ONLY good things, that makes you a saint. ;p

      Delete
    11. And what if I'm kinda frightened of that I might be a sociopath?

      Delete
    12. And I also have cerebral palsy but I'm not a grave case. Can a person with that disease be a sociopath?

      Delete
  4. "and with what absolute confidence, some of them"

    Guilty! (hand raised)

    LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  5. no she's not a sociopath. socios go smoother, they don't show, and surely, they're not that stupid. we're smart, we analyze, we don't screw up and talk like that. also, we don't sound boring. y're fairly boring and screwed.

    oh and also, we ARE capable of loving someone, it's just not the same. it's a bit unknown.. our feelings. it's weird it's controlable and deep. i think we feel deep while we don't feel.

    and M.E's fine. don't talk like that about her, cause it only makes y look jealous of being normal.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Diagnosis:17..jk :P. Socios don't cut themselves do they?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, I tried to when I was younger 'cos my pain tolerance seemed to be strangely off and me as the scientist I always have been needed to investigate that - and cutting was quite popular when I was like 12 or somethin' so it was clear the pain test must be of that kind.

      Turned out I simply can't, it's like a blockade hindering me on cutting right through so all I'd get are papercut-style little marks with almost no blood shed and a hell of a pain I just can't stand. Though it's quite interesting I forgot minutes afterwards how immense that pain was. (Tried it 2-3 more times to verify that there really was pain, then lost interest entirely. Way too much effort for nothing.)

      I guess it's mostly 'bout the motivation. If someone would have offered me something that would have seemed worth the pain and effort I sure as hell would have practiced until the blockade would have been gone xD

      Delete
    2. i have cut my self because i felt high by it. it was not boring. just at first.

      Delete
  7. Kid, you are not a sociopath. Take your time to stabilize your personality and get even with yourself. If you like being an asshole then why bother changing that? Especially since you don't feel remorse anyway?

    First thing that came to my mind after reading: You're a beeper. You cut yourself, you attempted suicide etc.
    Second: Tastes a bit like Avoidant PD, though the aggression seems kinda off. Maybe Negativistic PD?
    Third: You're a bloody kid. There's no way to tell what you have. Especially not over the internet with those few words. Too much speculating for me right at the moment, I'm out.


    And to have that said, just because someone called you a psychopath doesn't mean you are one. Or do you suddenly turn into a duck if I tell you that you must be a duck? (If yes you should go see a health professional asap, it might be something serious!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, more to the point, you've got another 6-8years of brain development and body development left, so there is that. Not saying anything one way or another - but I like NM's summary:

      If you like being an ass hole, well, keep up the good work!

      (and, my name is Harry, and I am an Ass Hole - doesn't always work for me though...FWIW from a guy at about the mid century mark.)

      Delete
    2. HL,
      Your name is Harry Haller then? You gotta be kidding me!
      Ever been to a magic theater? Where entrance is not for anybody, only for madmen? xD

      In case you don't know what I'm talking about:
      http://www.cliffsnotes.com/literature/s/steppenwolf/book-summary

      That's one of my most favourite books actually.

      Delete
    3. I gotta ask...what's a beeper?

      Delete
    4. Dr. G,
      I was using internet terminology in an attempt to utilize fancy words. I was referring to people with Borderline Personality.

      Delete
    5. Why do they call it beeper? Yea, I mean based on this short description it sounds more bpd.

      Delete
    6. As far as I could fetch it it's something about the pronunciation, but I'm not sure, I found the term under urbandictionary.com.
      Can such people really be so destructive? It's really interesting, and would clear up quite a bit of some of my past encounters with psych's.

      Delete
    7. Hi NM,

      Harry Haller the Steppenwolf, at your service! 8)~

      I enjoy Herman Hesse (among others; I like to read) and Steppenwolf, in particular has given me a lot to think about over the years. I relate to the internal struggle of the character – but I expect a lot of people hanging out here can.

      I was riffing Faust a while back about this being my “Magic Theater” and M. E. being Hermine. Now, if I can just find Pablo… ;)~

      Delete
    8. Yeah, good ol' Faust, couldn't read 'em though. When I wanted to (already read through first few pages and liked & understood), I was told this is for the older pupils, not for 10 year olds... then with 17 I should have read Faust as homework, but wasn't interested anymore. It's a shame, today's school system...

      Delete
    9. "Can such people really be so destructive?" Are you asking about bpd? Not sure if you have any experience with this population, but if you really don't then haha you have noooooo idea. They have support groups for people who were victimized by people with bpd. I should join one :P I've been traumatized by borderlines. I compare borderlines to fire. Well...I got burned by the fire.

      Delete
    10. I have read a lot because I like to read and because I majored in English in college. However, I've never read Hesse. From following the link, I guess I see how it applies.

      As far as I can figure out, I am a slightly empathic person by nature, but kind of an nihilist/psychopath/sociopath intellectually. Thus I like your screen name "Nihilistic Mind." My screen name here actually is a snapshot of some old irrelevant history, but I am stuck with it, so oh, well.

      For a long time, I tried to figure out if there was any philosophical basis for ethical behavior. Then, the epiphany. There is none. I have some empathy, though it's pretty low compared to a lot of people. (Nature.) I was raised by crazy family but basically decent people and I was raised in an erratic, but basically decent culture (20h Century). (Nurture.

      Also, I am practical. I lack the instincts to be a Stalin or a Ted Bundy and also the skills and talent, so my chances of staying alive and enjoying life are much higher if I restrict my antisocial tendencies to offending and irritating people (which I have considerable talent for doing).

      I can't really use it as a screen name here without some major jiggering which I don't think I am up to, but my preferred description of myself would be ETHICAL NIHILIST.

      Delete
  8. Each of us is both more and less than our labels.

    Each of us is slightly different than we were yesterday and slightly different than we will be tomorrow.

    Over years, those infinitesimal differences sometimes add up to huge changes. The human brain can only really be aware of what it is at the current moment, and most of the time, for most of us, it feels as if it's always been that way.

    Of course, it seldom if ever is. At 70, I still often feel as if I was 10 again. I think it's called 2nd childhood.

    At 14, I was terrified of everyone and everything. Nothing was more scary to me than the idea of being rejected and criticized. I was rejected and criticized. I survived. So I said, "Fuck you." It's hardly a death penalty offense. Even so, it's probably not a good idea to walk up to the next cop I see and say that to him or her. Especially because I volunteer for the police. So I'm keeping an eye on all of you.

    You have relatives in Homeland Security? You have relatives in Poland? You have relatives in North Korea?

    We're everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Schoolyard bullies, were they psychopaths? Most were "thick" (stupid) people with egos big as houses. Many surely were zodiac leos or aries people with little insight & lots of "look at me"-yearnings, narcissism combined with youthful "over the top" behaviour.

    ReplyDelete
  10. hi, can any sociopath give me a tip on how to ruin someones's life??


    Abc

    ReplyDelete
  11. "But I also found it to be at least interesting to see other people respond to who I was via the book -- whether it was things that I thought were interesting, insightful, factually (in)accurate, not likely, etc."

    This is a good point, M.E., and I hope that you received a lot of thoughtful responses about your insightful book.

    ReplyDelete
  12. hi, can any sociopath give me a tip on how to ruin someones's life??


    Abc

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah sure,
      First step, observe your target. Take your time. Use theory of mind (cognitive empathy) to get a grip of what their motives are, what moves them subconsciously, what they like, love, hate, fear. See right through their masks, make forecasts of their behaviour in certain situations to test the accuracy of your theories. Depending on your practical experiences this step can take up to several months or even years.

      Second step, plot out a neat script on which you will operate, using the information obtained in the first step. When planning your steps, take into account the legal situations which could get you into trouble too early. Think through your plan again and again, changing the variables to see what could go wrong.

      Third step, let it rest. Stop thinking about this whole project for some time, let it sink into your mind soaking dripping down to your instincts and intuition. You will know it when you're done with this step.

      Fourth step, accomplish your plan, listen to your instincts/intuition. Be flexible, use the alternate routes plotted out in the second step if applicable.

      I sincerely hope I was a help to you. If not, don't hesitate to ask for more details and more specified information and advice. I'll charge you for only the exceptionally low compensation of 10 US$ per vowel.

      And don't be so impatient, Anon.

      Delete
    2. Don't ruin anyone's life. Let those thoughts go, and focus on something else.

      Delete
    3. thanks for the tip Nihilistic mind, are you a real socio??


      abc

      Delete
    4. abc Anon,
      I might be a psychopath or a sociopath or none of those. I'm definitely not trained to scientifically or, for that matter, clinically approve of such assumptions. On the Levenson Psychopathy Self-Report Scale I score 4.6/4.7, which is high as the scale goes only up to 5, and on the PCL-R I seem to score somewhere inbetween 27 and 36 depending on how much you weigh in on some of my past actions and stuff. Though after all I'm just me - A label can't change but only exhilarate that.


      Anon 12:51,
      If someone asks for destruction and you give peace and remission they will inevitably scream for havoc and mayhem and be indignant about your incapability to see their version of the truth.
      Your tactic doesn't work for someone striving to "ruin someones's life". It will, however, work for someone asking for what you offer. Concentrate on them instead of wasting your energy here.

      Delete
    5. Lol! Don't listen to this Nihilistic's bullshit, if you know their "real names" use and abuse the wild internet world.( e.g. if they got a business go everywhere and tell people their products sucks, or someone died using their stuff ;), Or 101 other nasty things that you can say.) And have fun while doing it. :) . Good Luck!

      Delete
    6. Since you mentioned the Levenson Psychopathy Self-Report I found a little online version, and took it. I got a 4.1 for primary psychopathy, and 3.2 for secondary psychopathy. "You score for primary psychopathy was higher than 91.63% of people who have taken this test. You score for secondary psychopathy was higher than 78.18% of people who have taken this test." Here's a link if anyone else wants to take it: http://personality-testing.info/tests/LSRP.php

      Delete
    7. Cute little test. Doubt it would be useful past entertainment value though
      I got:

      Your score from primary psychopathy has been calculated as 4.6. Primary psychopathy is the affective aspects of psychopathy; a lack of empathy for other people and tolerance for antisocial orientations.

      Your score from secondary psychopathy has been calculated as 3.6. Secondary psychopathy is the antisocial aspects of psychopathy; rule breaking and a lack of effort towards socially rewarded behavior.

      You score for primary psychopathy was higher than 95.74% of people who have taken this test.

      You score for secondary psychopathy was higher than 88.6% of people who have taken this test.

      Delete
    8. Hi Dr. G.,

      I came in at 4.1 and 3.9 – I think I took this a while back with similar results.

      But, as Anon said, “besides entertainment…?”

      I guess I’m a little surprised at being in the 90% for both scales…feels inflated to me…maybe…

      Delete
    9. Besides entertainment... was there even another reason?

      I honestly doubt the self-report is of great value since I got a higher factor 2 rate than factor 1, and both above 4.5, still I'm no criminal but instead I study bimedicines...

      Well, okay, I have to confess I'm a massmurderer. I annihilate whole cultures by accident, really makes me feel almost sad sometimes - though weren't my cultures anyway. Cultures of cells that is :p

      Delete
    10. "Besides entertainment... was there even another reason?" lol exactly..thanks NM :P

      Delete
    11. I just took the test. I am not sure I am reading the scores correctly, as they don't seem to be the same scale as the ones listed above. 43.75% of Factor 1. 27.78% of Factor 2. Score 14 of 38. As much as I can make sense of it, I would say that I am a little frayed around the edges, but don't need to be locked up. Also, in the last few years I have become more skillful and careful at "passing" as non psychopath. 1 I am too old and mentally slipping to get away with much, so I have to be careful to stay out of trouble and to stay married.

      "There are strong indications that you might have a narcissistic personality disorder." That sounds about right to me. "I am so fine."

      "There is no indication that you might have a histrionic personality disorder." Yeah, I'm cool.

      "You meet 100% of the range of general personality disorder."

      About a year or so ago, I had a test from a very experienced psychologist for dementia. His diagnosis was that I was losing a few marbles, but mostly they are still on the track. I also got confusing feedback on whether or not I have an "psychopathic antisocial personality disorder." Apparently not . . . but.

      As I am a fanatical atheist I was rather irritated by the examining psychologist (while having a doctorate from a reputable school and experience working in a state prison) is 1 (about the same age as I am and I sort of expected that his marbles were rolling around as loosely as mine) and 2 he is also a Presbyterian minister with a divinity degree.

      I try to be polite to religious believers, but I regard religious belief as such total nonsensical crap, it's difficult for me to respect people who believe it.

      Delete
    12. The LSRP measures two scales.

      Scores range from 1 (low) to 5 (high).

      Your score from primary psychopathy has been calculated as 4.9. Primary psychopathy is the affective aspects of psychopathy; a lack of empathy for other people and tolerance for antisocial orientations.

      Your score from secondary psychopathy has been calculated as 3.7. Secondary psychopathy is the antisocial aspects of psychopathy; rule breaking and a lack of effort towards socially rewarded behavior.

      Internet tests

      Delete
  13. WTF?? guys no responses

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you want to ruin someone's life, give them what they ask for.

      Delete
    2. "WTF?? guys no responses" WTF - no credit card number? That shit don't come for free! 8D~

      Delete
  14. Figure it out yourself Anon. That's half the fun.

    Also...I think it's fun if nothing else to apply a label to yourself. It's like wearing a shiny hat. The hat can say a lot about your personality and your charms even your wit. At the end of the day though, it's just a hat.

    Labels are only as good as they are practical. Most PD's are only bad if the person with one is unhappy or feeling disadvantaged. If you're having relationship problems then focus on changing your behavior. Telling yourself you're a sociopath and can't help it does NOT help.

    I still toy with emotions...and screw with people's heads. Specifically the people closest to me. However there is a definite line I will not cross without first having a discussion about possible repurcussions. Typically it's a simple as that.

    Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I know that is a bad bad thing to toy with someone and to ruin people, etc , but i kinda like it, life is boring without some fun, and like in the animal kindom its the survival of the fittest, right??


    abc

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do something else for fun and keep your mind off trying to ruin someone. It's for the best.

      Delete
  16. Harry Haller's Sociopath Mentoring Network

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    Replies
    1. Damn it, Doc. I just wanted to enjoy the second season of Dexter and now I can't stop chuckling. I don't even know why exactly...

      Delete
    2. Well NM you are a character. I would not talk to you face to face, your so swawry... lol, no really i do think i get you kind of, which is in it's own way one of those fascinating experiences at a safe distance.

      buy yeah, it's been written here before how much happier everyone might be if budding sociopaths actually had sociopathic mentors who, for whatever imaginable reasons had commitment to steering them in socially approved directions in the long run. These are not tame creatures.

      So? Now that i"ve been totally honest how about you?

      lol

      Delete
    3. I'm really tame, Doc, you needn't be afraid of me. Most people around me actually enjoy being with me, at least nowadays that is. As long as you don't get closer than approximately half a meter, don't stand right in front of me and straightly looking in my eyes it's rather unlikely I'd get dangerous. I'm a sheep, mostly. Thank you for the compliment though xD

      While I personally don't feel it's really worth the energy to damage or ruin someone just out of fun or to change something that's actually quite right and going, I would enjoy mentoring anyone who wants that.

      I'm a dog psychologist in my spare time, working with medium to highly disturbed dogs, Pitbulls, AmStaffs and Working Shepherddogs and the like - all of them with some kinds of substantial problems which proved to be dangerous in some respect. I provide them with a guide they can follow in situation they couldn't cope with when let alone or mistreated and help them stabilize the personality traits that got deranged in order for them to function better within given frames. My favourite cases were "Pogo", "Benny", "Shorty" and "Neon" so far, if you want you can ask 'bout them at any time. Beware though, I can talk about "my" dogs for hours on end.

      Due to university I had to lay my hobby aside, but mentoring disturbed human beings sounds like a neat substitute. c:

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    4. Oh gee, NM, are you the dog whisperer? I can see the parallels.

      Wasn't it you who mentioned how endearing you found people who chose to trust you anyway after you told them you were a sociopath? I recognize my own weakness so woudn't get face to face with someone who scored where you do. I'm a traumatized victim after all... lol.. oh, where was I, oh yeah,

      that mentoring business could do much better here, glad to see you. I really do enjoy reading your comments.

      so what do you think are the main connection between your enjoyment and talents in treating disturbed dogs and the Harry Haller Sociopath mentoring network?

      is it instinct? is it connecting with their instinct first? do you think it is easier to train these dogs than to mentor disturbed antisocial human beings?

      Even these dogs are tame, but damaged. They are tame compared to wolves. You wouldn't try to tame a wolf would you?

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    5. NM, tell us about your My Little Pony collection.

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    6. Man I hate that limit thing... so here the answer in two parts:

      "Oh gee, NM, are you the dog whisperer? I can see the parallels."

      Doc, I've been greatly fascinated by Cesar Millan for quite a while, to be exact by his exceptional abilities to choose the exactly right words and phrases to get people to understand, back in a time I had no clue about sociopathy and the like - I did actually see someone who was very similar to me, can't evaluate that objectively though.

      "Wasn't it you who mentioned how endearing you found people who chose to trust you anyway after you told them you were a sociopath?"

      I'm not sure if that was me, I think I normally don't really care about whether you choose to trust me or not. Though I often try to tell people I trust and/or like as fast as possible about it, but most commonly I'll tell you I'm sort-of an Aspie. Explains enough for people not to bother about my aloofness and strange behaviour/interests.

      "I'm a traumatized victim after all..."

      You have something in common with my dogs then, they are all traumatized.

      "I really do enjoy reading your comments."

      Happy to hear that :)

      "so what do you think are the main connection between your enjoyment and talents in treating disturbed dogs and the Harry Haller Sociopath mentoring network?"

      The connections, well, I love patterns, I'm good at spotting them. Recognizing patterns and realizing where they are defective as well as how to put them back in place is a great deal of what I have to do with the dogs to start a therapy program.

      I make not much distinctions between dogs and people whatsoever, except for that I tend to take some things personal with people sometimes, if I don't have an eye on that. Like if they misunderstood me, with dogs I think it's my fault, with people i think it's their fault. That kind of started when I began to fight those horrible narcissistic inclinations of mine, I probably should go back a bit and allow myself to think I'm actually superior just to the degree of realizing people, like dogs, don't automatically grasp what I'm trying to tell them. I'll have to work on this more.

      I think it's basically the same, but more complex. The dogs live in their kennels, they have pretty much only themselves to distract them, plus they can't communicate about past and future. But with people things start to get opaque: parents, teachers, friends, foes, strangers on the street, inner monologues, et cetera - all can have impact on the patterns to varying degrees and therefore force me to change and adjust my methods more often than I have to with the dogs. It'll be more challenging c:

      "to train these dogs"

      I don't train them per se, I rather work with them in a way they cognitively can resolve their problems much on their own, which brings longer lasting results - I communicate with them through body language and action, thus showing them exactly what is the wrong way and encouraging the better ways.
      Training is to entertain - nothing more or less, it's tricks that won't alter the behaviour in the slightest. I like to do that too, just not as much as using actual dog psychology.

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    7. "Even these dogs are tame, but damaged. They are tame compared to wolves. You wouldn't try to tame a wolf would you?"
      I've tamed a wild mouse when I was 14 years old. Wild animals cannot be truly tamed to the same degree a dog can be, but a domesticated dog, if some of the inherited instincts were left intact through selective breeding, can get much wilder a wild wolf can ever be. This is the up- and the downside of dogbreeding.

      Some dogs I've worked with would tear you to shreds because of an too slow or too fast movement of your head, or inaccurate blinking of the eye, without even wanting to attack you (I can see it in their eyes) I often came home with my arms blue and purple and several (not actually severe) bleeding wounds. But I mentally went through the situations until I figured the problem and next time the same failure wouldn't happen as likely again. Pogo was one of those dogs that made it hard for me to find a comfortable position to sleep at night xD

      And for the wolves, if I ever get the chance of taming a wolf I would love to give it a try. Wolves are very sociable with a very active facial mimic that would warn me whenever I'd get to point I shouldn't be getting to. I actually love to communicate with the zoo wolves through the fence, zookeepers wouldn't let me in though, for no price.


      Anon, I dislike My Little Pony but I used to be a Pokemonfan(atic). I still have a great deal of Pokemon related stuff, like videogames, gameboygames, films, trading cards and all the like. I'm too lazy to arrange them in an aesthetic manner for a photo though.

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    8. Well, it's one am over here and that of course messed up my first double-post answer on this blog xD

      I forgot to insert the line "do you think it is easier to train these dogs than to mentor disturbed antisocial human beings?" right in front of the paragraph that begins with "I think it's basically the same, but more complex."

      I wish it was possible to edit the posts...

      Delete
    9. Hi NM, yeah I agree with you about the dog whisperer and didn't imagine I"d come across someone who connects him to sociopathy in a sensible way.

      I'm curious what you mean by taming a wild animal to any degree. It is not clear to me what you mean by that. There's also the nature of the type of relationship that you have with the animal -- how that gets mapped into their brain. Is it that you become their leader?, the leader of the pack so to speak?

      And I'm curious to know how you would relate your traumatized dogs to any traumatized human being. What are the connections?

      Delete
    10. HH’s Socio Mentoring Network! LOL!!!

      I think the reality is that if someone really is on track for life as a Cluster B, having someone around to show them how to stay out of jail (and, maybe even put their talents to “good use”) isn’t the worst idea out there.

      When I was a kid, I wasn’t very good with authority (big surprise, I am sure). Towards the end of my high school days, I went to the school for “bad kids” – in those days they called them “continuation high schools” (are they still called that? I should find out soon...). The guy running the place when I first got there seemed to understand the direct confrontation was worse than useless. After doing a burnout with a motorcycle, he came to me and asked me to not do that again because insurance would be a hassle – no threats, no drama. After that, I settled down (and it was mostly a mellow place given the sorts attending). The following year he was replaced by a guy with more “traditional methods”…and he got “traditional results.” It was a fun year of chaos - but mellow it wasn't.

      I’ve long thought that the “perhaps unsavory, but otherwise trusted uncle” has a very real place in the world. He’s the guy that lets kids take their first drink or smoke their first cigarette (or, in my case, baby bit my buddies and me when we dropped acid – more than we should have, really). But, being “family” you know he won’t let things get too far out of hand. You don’t want to co-sign, but knowing that someone that is connected to the kid is there to help manage the damage might make it easier and have better outcomes.

      And it is why I think that the traditional methods (i.e. punishment avoidance) are not all that helpful. These are kids that like a fight – and anything close to invalidation is going to trigger that. At least that’s how it was for me – I enjoyed getting into it with authority figures. Still sounds fun...

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    11. I think for an adolescent to find one adult who they believe 'gets them' is a big deal. May be more problematic for budding socios because they are a minority and because their mindset is already problematic for most people to deal with, more so than a regular teen. In some sense I believe most teens are 'crazy' anyway at times. It's episodic. If they got someone they can even the keel with may be then they don't feel the hatred or whatever drives some to truly destructive behavior... or lessen the degree of it.

      Delete
    12. "I'm curious what you mean by taming a wild animal to any degree."

      Well I thought about how to explain and it kinda looks like this is boiling down to the old power & domination stuff... somewhat chastening – it used to feel like something much more, more or less spiritual in one way or the other.
      Can't really settle my mind on what it means to tame an animal, but it's definitely not a binary criterium.

      What I always felt with dogs was that they wouldn't strive for the highest/most dominant/leader position if they didn't have to, but if no one's in control someone gotta do something and dogs seem to be like me, they do it if it has to be done.
      But if you take over the control and behave competent, letting them know by each and every step you take that you are the one who takes responsibility for their wellbeing, they will give in to more and more of your demands even if it gets kinda unclear why you demand something.

      I personally consider any animal as completely tamed/controlled when they will literally jump off a 50 meter high building on your demand because they trust you that it is the right thing to do. I dislike this extreme, every creativity dies down if you demand total submission. (though of course it does sound interesting in some way for me, though not so much with animals)
      The other end of the spectrum would be the animal questioning every of your decisions and not trusting in your competence as a leader or whatever you want to call it. Most of my non-pitbull/staff dogs start there.

      Wild animals generally seem to never reach a state in which they would give up their selves as some dogs will do without making use of highly aversive methods and breaking their will. That's true for some other dogs too.


      "And I'm curious to know how you would relate your traumatized dogs to any traumatized human being. What are the connections? "

      It's one and the same for me, if you hit a dog with no reason in particular situations, they'll react mostly the same as if you'd do the same with a person. I see the same movements, the same movement intentions (the center of gravity shifted backwards in this case), similar facial mimic (eyes wide, muscles tightly drawn back etc.) and often enough even same gestures like raising arm/paw for protection.

      If the reaction is the same, the inner workings have to be very similar at least. So it's rather easy for me to see connections where others might not see them.

      Delete
  17. This post saddened me. I hope this kid gets professional help.

    As for the strange person (s) who keep obsessing about and/or bashing M.E., please stop clogging up her blog with such disrespectful nonsense. I believe she prefers intelligent comments that further insight into the topics discussed herein. As well, whoever you are, you do look foolish posting this crap. Just saying. Smarten up.

    Grendel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe you should suck her dick.

      Delete
    2. Every day I wake up and my ever lurking depression nibbles at my psyche. I ask myself, where on this wonderful artifact of modern technology can I find some inspirational positive news to cheer myself up?

      This place seldom fails. Thank you Anonymous lurking over your keyboard in your crack house for coming up with my inspiration fix of the day.

      Delete
    3. Grendel I am sorry if I've hurt your feelings, hope your okay, but I will gently tell you to fuck of, its kinda boring with people like you, I hope your not a socio:)))))

      Delete
    4. Anon, You. Are. So. Boring.

      Grendel

      Delete
  18. Since I am in a cheerful mood after reading the anonymous dick sucking dimwit who flunked basic anatomy, I will post my cheerful "look on the bright side" classic poem of the day.

    Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
    We people on the pavement looked at him:
    He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
    Clean favored, and imperially slim.

    And he was always quietly arrayed,
    And he was always human when he talked;
    But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
    "Good-morning," and he glittered when he walked.

    And he was rich – yes, richer than a king –
    And admirably schooled in every grace:
    In fine, we thought that he was everything
    To make us wish that we were in his place.

    So on we worked, and waited for the light,
    And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
    And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
    Went home and put a bullet through his head.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Radical Agnostic, you sound like a smart person, are you a writer??, and you can also suck my dick too, besides I will pay you


      abc

      Delete
    2. 1 of several. Anonymous, I have good news and bad news about my intelligence. The good news is that I come from an intelligent and talented (not to mention, mentally ill) family. My maternal uncle is the most famous modern "classical" composer you never heard of, winner of a Pulitzer Prize and a MacArthur "genius" award, and on a first name basis with modern classical music luminaries such as Stravinsky, Copland, Cage, etc. My paternal cousin, though raised in a family entirely engendered by Eastern European Jews, became fluent in two dialects in Mandarin, spent most of her life on Taiwan, owned factories in mainland China, became a Christian in Taipei, telling me once, "I love Taiwan! It's the last place on earth where you can find 'good old fashioned American family values.' Along with becoming the only millionaire in my family, she was a disgustingly kind and altruistic person; kind of a national heroine on Taiwan with a library named after her.

      The bad news is that I am in terms of my family gene stream, I am kind of the village idiot. Though on the other hand, many of my family are crazy. Not a joke (though I think it funny). One of my brothers is a "triple threat" (though, not so far, threatening. He lives in Missouri. Very intelligent. He has at least three psychiatrists. Shrink #1 diagnoses him as "psychotically depressed" Shrink #2 diagnoses him as "schizophrenic." Shrink #3 puts his bet on "bipolar." If there is a mental illness Olympics somewhere, he should enter. Periodically, the cops in Springfield MO find him wandering the streets having conversations with himself. "Of your meds, Joel?" they ask him; then drive him home. One of my sisters is probably equally crazy, though she stays as far away from shrinks as she can get (and is also bright). She is a religious fanatic, perhaps narcissistic (or something similar) and has regular conversations with Jesus. She is sure He is listening and following her advice.

      Delete
    3. 2 of 2. I wrote a book once, though it's entirely forgettable. If you want my real name, look up TEACH YOURSELF MICROSOFT WORD FOR THE MACINTOSH. Totally out of date.

      As far as sucking your probably shriveled and highly infectious dick, that reminds me of a joke. A socio rich man is dancing with an attractive slutty looking chick at a party. As they dance, he asks, "Will you fuck me for a million dollars?"

      She ponders, answers, "If you pay me in cash beforehand, OK."

      He then asks, "Will you suck my dick for $20?"

      The woman slaps him, and snarls, "What kind of a woman do you think I am?"

      The man chortles, "We've already established that. Now we're just dickering over the price."

      I have a question for you about modern English (American) slang and vernacular. Over time, the phrase "that sucks" has come to mean that something is really awful. "That movie sucks," "That's a totally sucky restaurant," etc. It's become such an accepted part of our language that lots of people say it without realizing its roots lie (in part) with oral sex.

      But really, although sucking dick is probably more of a treat for the person receiving the blow job than for the boy or girl delivering it; in general, sucking is probably more of a "good" thing than a bad thing.

      Though our dirty language is crazy. A "blow job" does not involve blowing. Perhaps it's a tiny vestige of sexism in our almost completely "pussified" culture, but there's almost no corresponding slang for "hard on" When was the last time you heard a chick say, "I have a 'wet on' for you."

      Incidentally, as a sign of how culture changes over time and location. The Ancient Romans had almost no word or concept for homosexuality. There were men who wanted to fuck men and women who wanted to fuck women. By the Roman values of the time, appropriate and admired fucking was contrasted with inferior and contemptible sex by "active vs. passive." In other words, a "strong, admirable" sex partner who was fucking with a man or a woman. Women were by definition passive and inferior. A man who took a dick in the mouth or the ass was inferior and contemptible.

      As far as your offer, I think we have to start with a non-negotiable price of $1,000,000. After Planned Parenthood provides a certificate that you have no STDs. And then it has to be filmed on broadcast on YouTube. with your social security number listed.

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    4. Radical Agnostic, I don't know what to say, I don't have $1,000,000 cash, but I could offer you $500,000 first and $500,000 after the blowjob, threesome with my girlfriend and to cum in your mouth, if you agree. and by the way nice joke.

      Delete
    5. RA. Like. "So on we worked, and waited for the light,
      And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
      And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
      Went home and put a bullet through his head."
      Lovely.

      Grendel

      Delete
  19. what do you guys think about people with high machiavellian personality, I recently read a book called '' The 48 laws of Power'', pretty weird and amoral book

    ReplyDelete
  20. I missed all the sex talk a few posts back. I really liked the comment discussion threads.

    The N character was fascinating to listen too. Especially liked her comments :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Has anyone been watching Degrassi recently? relevance? watch. lmao best show ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I havent watched since season 10 :(

      Delete

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