Friday, January 9, 2009

How to fight a sociopath -- and win!

A book like that would be an instant bestseller. If you figure there are 50 million sociopaths in the world and every one of them knows about 200 people, that's ... that's a lot of people who would be buying the book. It seems like most empaths can't tell how to spot a sociopath, so you go reading all these books and looking at all these websites purporting to tell you how. The problem with those sources is that they may be have some valid information, but they're about as useful as a book about becoming a millionaire. Maybe some of those methods would work with some empaths looking for some sociopaths some of the time, but there is no surefire method. That's why you have all those books and websites.

Still, I sympathize with your position, empaths. You're creeped out that there are these otherworldy beings wandering around making your life miserable for their own sport.

The truth is that sociopaths are largely harmless. Just ask Andrew Bird. Sure, we may play with your minds a bit, but with me it's more like teasing than anything else. Let's say you had a younger sibling who you liked to give a hard time. Or when you're out and about and you see a little girl dressed up like a princess or a little boy dressed up like a pirate, what do you do? You say, "Wow a princess!" or "Oh no, a scary pirate!" You play along with the kid because you can. It's sort of fun and you get to feel like you are being superior and nice at the same time -- so superior that you can afford to condescend to their ridiculous level and play along with their little fantasies for a while. Empaths are for the most part harmless too, so why not go along with their make-believe? Meet an empath who thinks he's beautiful or smart or talented? Feed that belief. That's pretty much all the sociopath interactions you'll see in your lives. All we do is tell you the equivalent of "Santa is real." Is that really so bad? Those of you who are smart probably realize it's just for your own good.

But with that said, I can predict situations in which you might want to beat a sociopath at his own game. What next? Well, as mentioned in earlier posts, one of the sociopath's main tools is mimicking human emotions. How do they know what to mimic? By watching you. How do you trick them? By feeding them false information. A sociopath's ability to act normal is only as good as the information he has available to him about what you expect. When you feed him false information, it ends up like one of those dry British farces where misunderstandings and confusions abound. But you're not confused because you know what's going on. And then you've beat him. That's all there is to it.

Congratulations, you fought a sociopath -- and won! Was it worth the effort? How about a nominal charge for a bestselling book of the same name?

600 comments:

  1. If you think empaths are "harmless" just read THE MASS PYSCHOLOGY OF FASCISM by Wilhelm Reich. THE GENEALOGY OF MORALS by Nietzsche is also quite instructive.
    Sociopaths are easy to beat on an individual level. You just have to be smarter, stronger, more creative and quicker mentally, on your feet.
    -Vigilius

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    1. HOW? Please recommend a site or book with tips. The books you mentioned regarding empaths won't help fight a psychopath in a divorce.

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    2. 2little2late. Am in the same position. Would you like to talk?

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    3. Wait, is there a fight I wasn't aware of between the empaths and the sociopaths?

      And YES, first replier. Why is hard for empaths to realize that they are more dangerous than us? They are like cattle and can be led by their own fear and emotions to say, wipe out civilizations and entire races.

      Ted Bundy kills a small group of people and his crimes are some huge atrocity, when your silly devotion to gods causes the crusades and the inquisition, holy wars and Nazis. Guess what, if we are looking at evil on the magnitude of extinguishing human life, the empaths win hands down.

      As the saying goes, "the death of one is a tragedy; the death of millions is just a statistic." It's because empaths write history and create the statistics.

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    4. There is no war between empaths and sociopaths, so stop acting like it, both sociopaths and empaths are to blame for the atrocities HUMANKIND have commited, as well as the good it has done.

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  2. For a claimed hater of narcissists, you are closer to that than a sociopath.

    Just because one person feeds you indirect or false information does not mean they will win. What about the other hundreds of people observed before? A sociopath doesn't learn when they've done something wrong because they either gain pleasure from it or honestly see no wrong in it, but this does not mean that they simply do not learn.

    Lying to a sociopath and thinking you will win is stupid. What has the sociopath been doing his or her entire life? Lying. Unless they end up falling into a highly-narcissistic lifestyle, they are going to recognize a liar and will immediately trump them due to their amount of comfort and experience with lying that an empath would not have.

    Your "battle tactics" seem more like a way of defeating you rather than sociopaths as a whole.

    Your post on November 9th, 2008 is the most proving of your narcissism and your understanding of, possibly because it is yourself, only low functioning sociopaths.

    You create a very ugly caricature of the sociopath. If you're going to try to appear more than you are at least stay consistent. But you should do that already being a sociopath and all.

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    1. Unless the idea is to make casual empath visitors overconfident in their ability to deal with an adult sociopath.

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  3. Vigilus - what you described is a way to beat anyone - empath or sociopath. So like the rest of your comments there is no substance. So how about you actually address your own topic and give some real input as to how to beat a sociopath. Also, if you've read any of this persons posts before, you'd know that they've come to the conclusion that empaths can be just as dangerous as sociopaths.

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    1. I am an empath and it rocks me to my core to ever hurt anyone. There have been times I have inadvertently hurt people.I have always felt great remorse to where it actually haunts me. I do not even like to kill bugs. Sociopaths are abundant and I do believe they are emotionally,mentally,spiritually dangerous people for the most part. Granted,they often are very intelligent as they do not struggle with strong moral conscience, emotions or remorse. As a result, they often do not hesitate to gossip, slander and will lie without a problem. Bullies are sociopaths and they essentially kill people.Sociopaths are evidently epidemic in government and in the business world. Which explains why the United States is being absorbed by people who have no sense of loyalty to the American people.Sociopaths are highly effective people only because they lack a sense of basic moral and ethical sincerity.Cold blooded characteristics reminiscent of great fascist rulers like Stalin, Nero, Bush and Cesar.(DEMOCRACY IS A LIE IN THE US). Unfortunately,I live in an area with a high prevalence of these kind of people and it has been a real learning experience. I came from the north where people make some effort to be kind or human. Down south they seem to make an effort to be purposefully and intentionally evil,unkind,create sorrow,sow discouragement,capitalize on fear and magnify doubt in each other. Opposite of empaths who are natural nurturers, provide encouragement,support and hope by fortifying an individual with focus on strengths and potential. In my opinion,sociopaths truly demonstrate their kinship with the father of lies as evidenced by their thought life that translates into behavior that is catastrophically damaging on an extremely large scale.

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  4. To beat an empath, just become an authority figure.
    -Vigiluis

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  5. If an empath was lying about his own emotions, how would a sociopath know? If the empath said, "I'm sad," would the sociopath be able to tell it was a lie?

    I don't think the author is saying that sociopaths are stupid, but that they have to take things empaths say about their feelings on face value -- just like the post on breaking up with a sociopath where the empath pretends to be sick or boring the whole time. Would a sociopath know that the empath was faking? Maybe if he really wanted to, but I think most sociopaths wouldn't bother trying to expose the lie.

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  6. People can "say" whatever they want, but you have to take the entire context into consideration, including body language, etc.
    -Vigilius

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  7. Are all sociopaths this boring??

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  8. Ok,,I definitely know a sociopath and trust me I tried to trump him at his own games. He knew exactly when I was lying. He replayed the games throwing me for a loop as he was that good I could not tell it was him. I have begged to be let go from him. I have tried everything to get him out of my life. I think now he is done with me but now I miss him. How sad is that? Man, he really knows how to play me. I have never met anyone like him. I even tried to change my own personality hoping to throw him off..but NO!!!!....not my little psycho. He enjoys these games. It's been 5 years now of this and now I think I am getting immune to it. How did he tag me? I told him a psychic once told me long ago about him and that we would marry eventually. She also warned me off of him saying he was a sociopath.I ran off from him terrified once I discovered the truth that she was right. Now, I miss him? He really enjoys playing these games with me, you know? He hates the fact I want things normal. Normal is boring to him. He doesn't do it to hurt me intentionally though. He just likes playing with me, toying with me. Is that sic or what? I could write a book about his ventures. To tell you the truth..I think if you opened the doors ..he would never let go. He would continue to walk through. Am I right or wrong?

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    1. Of course he would or at least I think he would. Well I know I would but I don't know about him.

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    2. I know exactly what you mean. My husband (we are separated) is a sociopath. He is like two people. One when he is with others, but always runs home to me, as he says, to normalise him. I do love him very much, but he is chaotic and a lot of work. I guess the answer is to do what they do, and use the best of them and try to deflect the worst. My husband is good to me in every way expect that his sociopathic ways means debt, infidelity, boredom, etc, etc. When I need him however he is always there. I sort of regard it a bit like you might with an animal, know the behaviour and learn how to handle it. You cannot get away from them so you have to learn to manage them. I have tried for 18 months to get a divorce but he won't hear of it and if we did divorce he wouldn't go away. He already has two ex-wives. One of which is now a very good friend of mine, and they both also had the same problems. My stepson is the same, except he can also be violent with it. I just have to laugh at times as they both do the same lying and and trickery to each other also. Talk about what goes around.

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  9. this is all a joke...you cannot beat a sociopath DUH!!! Sociopathic tendency at its truest form is to feel no remorse and to feel no responsibility. Nothing you can do can affect them. They don't feel...they don't feel anything. So you just need to stay away from these sick and disturbed hollow shells that pretend to be people. Just pity them. Pity is the sincerest form of really being above someone, and when you are ready forget about them. No sociopath is worth anyone's thoughts. They are worthless...they deserve no emotional consideration and should be let alone to rot in their messed up existence. It's not a game. They are hurtful and falsely existing at best, and dangerous in most cases. Only a person lacking any self-worth or self-respect would waste time on a sociopath (other than those unfortunate people who have sociopaths in their immediate family and cannot escape them).

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    1. Wow you have nice little hate fest going on there don't you?

      Aren't you really just diminishing the worth of people because you don't understand them?

      See I could have given these mean and nasty(but true) replies but I'm not going to because you are just a pathetic(but amusing) little bug. You are desperately trying to hold onto something you can understand but the thing is that you don't know how sociopaths think and fling around your ignorant little ideas(like "they don't feel anything") that are wrong but easier for you to understand

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    2. NO, your ignorant and have NO Clue what you are talking about. The commenter is correct. I am an investigator. Please stop misleading people, "Closet_Sociopath"

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  10. the only way to win the game is to not join it in the first place

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    1. true. only sometimes you join before you realize it's a game, you see...and they don't let go. ever...

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  11. Whoa whoa whoa. Not all sociopaths are hurtful, nor are most of our intentions ill. I for one try to do what I can through my sociopathic tendencies to enact as much positivity for others as I can. Not because I care for their well-being, but because being positive with others usually leads to positive feedback. Just because my only reason for being nice to you is so that I might get something in return doesn't mean I'm harmful or dangerous.

    I'm not saying that there aren't nefarious and vicious sociopaths out there, as I've known one for a great deal of my life. You just can't automatically assume we all 'rot in our messed up existence'.

    After all, can you not see what our host is trying to do for us, socios and empaths alike?

    -Morpheus

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  12. Nearly killed myself a couple of days ago over the mental torture inflicted by my own "harmless" sociopath. Thank God I had a real friend to talk me down. How to deal with a sociopath? The same way your would a man firing a mchine gun into a crowd. RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN. Don't look back, don't play games, don't try to change him with your love. JUST RUN. Oh, are you suffering, my darling socio? Shame. Goodbye forever.

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    1. Yeah we sociopaths can be like that if we don't have enough narcissism to hold them back. I do however have a quite healthy amount of it so i'm harmless as long as your harm doesn't benefit me.

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    2. omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes, run. it's sick. yuk...your mother didn't love you closet sociopath...i don't love you either...no one does...no one wants to give you anything. Everyone wants to leave you. Run run run away from YOU!!!!!

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  13. My life has been ruined by a sociopath mother; you cannot beat them. They have no remorse,I'm lucky to have lived through my child hood that I don't remember.

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  14. Beating (another) sociopath is about identification and very little else.

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  15. beating them at their own game is identification and very little?

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  16. In my past i've had 2 "best friends" who were sociopaths and a romance w/a sociopath. These pppl are attracted to ppl they envy so seeing as how i am a very visibly happy w/my life, I must attract them. That's my explanation to it. They know exactly what to say, when to say it, and how to say it. There is no beating them. It's all a game to them. They dont care if they make u suffer because they dont feel. They lie for a living. I tried to beat one at his own game once. He spotted my lie 10 miles away. Run from these people. They inflict nothing but insecurity about one's self! They have absolutely no shame. Nobody will take your side if you try to tell them about your unfortunate run in w/the sociopath because the sociopath is cunning and will manipulate and charm everyone around you. At one point I lost absolutely every friend I had because of 1 of my "best friend" sociopaths. Exposing them just makes them create new webs of lies which entangle you more and more. Stay away from them at all cost.

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  17. Thank you;my sociopath mother set me outside to play and showed me how to play in the dirt and then she drove over me with a tractor. I couldn't walk for a long time. She put my little brother to bake in the kitchen oven. I had a hard time getting his legs untied with whatever she had him tied up both of us young.Total violence every day. People think she is so wonderful. To this day she can manipulate me and uses other people to send message to me because I have tried to get her out of my life. I know I don't need her. But what do I say to sisters and brother and friends that feeding off of? I don't want to cut them off. So far she has ruined our relationships any communication is for information gathering. Then it is hurtful to say I don't talk to my mother or sister & brothers. Family ties are not there.I want to send her a christmas card naming some of the abuse she inflicted on us. even if I wasn't the one being beaten or whipped or having soap shoved down my mouth or hair pulled out or face and ears being slapped etc. the rest of us had to watch or at very least listen to it. I want the people like her brothers that she is so innoncent know the truth. and ass kissing inlaws that didn't grow up there. what do you think?

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    1. From my experience and perspective, I think it's time, and long overdue, I might add, to ditch mommy. Stating your case to her or anyone else is wasted energy. Your removal from her life, and remaining firm on this decision despite probable comments from others will eventually pull the plug on the family lie. I've taken this road myself, and many years later, the choices are still mine to make. It's a strong magnetic force to pull yourself away from. The human brain is unfortunately slow to heal, but if you can accept seeing the world in a new way, all the more power to you. Good luck. And if you're a strong empath, like I've read here and there on this site, I'd place your resources on building some boundaries, and if you're lucky, take down that empathy a notch.

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  18. Road kill asks, “what do you think?”

    Let me get this straight. Your mom ran over you with a tractor? Really? That cracked me up!!! I’m sorry but that sounds absurdly false, as in it sounds like bullshit. But hey, I’ve been wrong before. Ok, let’s just for arguments sake assume you’re telling the truth and that you’ve suffered terrible abuse at the hands of your mother. First, judging by what you’ve described, she doesn’t sound sociopathic to me. She sounds psychotic. Second, her “diagnosis” is irrelevant in any event. What is relevant is your own determination to take control of your experience. You do that by completely accepting that your mother and perhaps her family relate within a dynamic of abuse and pain and that nothing you say or do is likely to change that. Third, from a place of acceptance of what is, you are then free to decide for yourself what kind of life you want to experience. There are resources available out there that can help you shape your thinking, which in turn will shape your subjective experience. Find those resources and take full advantage of them. Then go and be as happy as you can be. If that’s your goal. Perhaps you want revenge though. Maybe you want to inflict as much suffering on your mother as you say she inflicted on you. That’s a whole other ball of wax and my advice then would switch to finding out what she loves, what she treasures and destroying it. At the very least, that’s a good start. And that, Road Kill, is what I think.

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  19. The is no way to truly "beat" a sociopath. Sure, you can "beat" his or her ass or put them down, but what good will it do?

    I have known a few "flagrant-type" sociopaths in my life (as was stated by another post, I think my happy and successful attitude attracts them) and getting their asses beat, arrested, fired from jobs and kick out of people's homes has absolutely no effect on these pitiful people because they have limited ability to learn from their behavior.

    Some sociopaths seem to think that their disorder is somehow an "advantage". Well, I can say that it is definitely a DISABILTY. Every sociopath I have ever known has been a loser that continues to fail repeatedly due to his/her inability to act is socially acceptable ways.

    Morpheus said he "tries" to do positive things. People shouldn't have to work at doing the right thing. We "empaths" as you call us naturally are able to appropriately interact socially without having to mentally concentrate on it. Sociopaths "try" or "observe and imitate". It must be a headache to have to concentrate at socializing all the time, which is why most sociopaths fail at it.

    I was good friends with one sociopath who fucked me over despite all the helpful and "shirt off my back" things I did for him. He even pulled an asshole move on me by going online pretending to be a woman and gave my number out relentlessly until I finally changed my number (which crushed his spirit). To this day I have yet to receive any apology, and he even continued to email me, blaming ME, his victim for what he was doing.

    The day I achieved true victory over this wack-job was when I let go of my desires for revenge or wanting to change him (it's often difficult to resist wanting to change sociopaths who you once cared about) and just ignored him.

    I truly pity him. Most of his family wants little to do with him. He drove his grandma so crazy that she scratched his face and kicked him out. The last I heard, he was living with the last relative willing to take him in. He has no license, no job and sits at home alone and depressed on the internet pretending to be a girl because he gets kicks out of fooling horny guys. What a pathetic, miserable existence.

    The only way to defeat sociopaths is to ignore them (unless you actually have to physically defend yourself) and let them continue on with their patterns of self-defeating behavior and hopeless lives. You don't need to destroy a sociopath. They destroy themselves.

    TheCircle

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    1. Yes, ignoring sociopaths until they go away is definitely one of the better strategies.

      However, I do respect the effort of someone who 'tries to do the right thing,' because trying implies that they are actually working at it.

      I am an empath, and based on my experience as an empath I know that you do have to work- and many times work very very hard- at doing the right thing. Empaths do terrible things and make wrong decisions all the time. When I do something wrong I get punished with a boatload of guilt and when I do something right, I generally feel much happier- however, that carrot-stick setup in and of itself is not a garuntee that I will always do the right thing. In fact, a lot of times my emotions can hijack me so that I do exactly the WRONG thing. Fear, for example is a very powerful emotion that inspires a lot of immoral behavior.

      One of the most annoying things about being an empath is that fear very often controls my actions if I don't consciously train myself to not respond to it. And that training takes a lot of time- some would argue a lifetime- to master, even with the 'carrot' that happiness gives me when I do the right thing.

      If a sociopath is willing to train themselves to do the 'right' thing without the benefit of the carrot of happiness or the stick of fear, I'm prepared to respect the amount of effort it takes.

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    2. Hey!! not all sociopaths are that stupid some of us have reason that tempers our sociopathic selves. I for example am not a man that is fond of displaying my "sociopathic self" to other people because that would be stupid and "socially unacceptable" and "socially unacceptable" is not a good thing for me. Manipulating people well is dependent on them not knowing your true nature.

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  20. To bring a sociopath to their knees, it only takes a minute. Ask them about an abnormal mole they have on their back, or tell them you (their lover) tested positive for an STD and want them to go get tested, or plant the seed about some disease. Or tell them there is something on their penis that looks like a wart. Watch them turn into mush before your very eyes. I guarantee it. Most are so self centered to the point they are hopeless hypochondriacs. Need to feel a little power and in control? This will do the trick. Then dump the loser for good.

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    1. You are talking about narcissists not sociopaths and although they often come together in single package a pure sociopath really wouldn't care even if you told him all of that and dumped him to boot. He would just find another one just like in matter of days if not minutes after you dumped him.

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    2. untrue closet sociopath. If you had a sprained finger and I had a broken arm, you would be screaming in my face about your sprained finger. :) also, you have a fear of rejection...of abandonment...one could play on that...but it usually sets "you", sociopaths, into a rage...so one should be careful when pressing this button...do it in public...then when they see the rage first hand...
      people might believe you when you tell them that your sociopath is crazy!!! And they will be OUTED!!!

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  21. what to do if i have a child with a sociopath and he is trying to hurt me by manipulating and emotionally hurting my child. How to make him leave us ???

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  22. why would anyone want to even look at one of these congenitally deformed freaks much less engage in a battle with them - kind of like stepping on an dirty bug that suirts you with slime

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    1. Eh sociopathy is a psychological thing not physical.

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  23. confusedbutawareJuly 31, 2010 at 7:41 AM

    The sociopath I am dealing with manipulated me to the point (Yes, I allowed the manipulation, I understand that even though I didn't realize it at the time) that I purchased several thousands of dollars of equipment for him so he could start a new career. My question is this--now that I realize I have been manipulated and used just for my money, my plan was to see him, play along like he is my best friend still, pack up the equipment (it's portable) while he is sleeping and leave without saying goodbye. Any thoughts about this tactic when dealing with a Sociopath? Kind of my way of making my own "restitution" for what he is doing. He recently asked me to purchase MORE equipment. I have not done this. He keeps asking and I play along like I will. He says he keeps asking because of "his own insecurities" and he is used to people leaving him even in friendships. I am just biding my time until I have access to the equipment I did buy for him so I can get some of my money investment back. So, what do y'all think about this idea?

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    1. I like it. Don't look back.

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  24. @confusedbutaware;

    hell yeah, do it. It's not even as if you'd be hurting his feelings- he hasn't got any.

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  25. First of all, I find it incredibly humorous that there are people on this site claiming to be sociopaths actually giving advice to empaths. The irony is immaculate.

    I've beaten my sociopath. Take a note, you injured. Give them no quarter. Just stop. Your passion is your power. Passionately cease to be interested in them. Make it a hobby, disinterest. Next, live your life as is, with happiness. I've done this. And now I'm literally watching her own lies tear her own world to pieces. Everything she envied about me and tried to destroy has ended up prospering. Everything she tried to rub in my face as superior to me has become the very catalyst of her own destruction. She has lost everything including her own family all at her own hand.

    And from my own observations, she will be on this cycle of self destruction til the day she dies . . . alone. I however, no matter how wealthy or poor I may end up, will be surrounded by people I've touched or have been touched by. I will be surrounded by those I love and who have love for me. Money and power and cunning can never buy that kind of happiness.

    You're an empath. You "know" who loves you and who doesn't. Stop giving the benefit of the doubt to those who don't truly love you (because that's our weakest button) and embrace those who do truly love you. You know who they are. . . deep down.

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    1. Holy shit!! You're in the sociopathic family!

      Although you would more of a cousin rather then brother cause you seem to be more on the psychopathic side. Its really amusing when psychopaths pop up on this forum.

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  26. Its not at all difficult to fool a sociopath, not an ignorant one at least.I've done it and kept it up for about a year now. Getting what i want from him, destroying him, and after what he did to me, feeling no guilt about it. And he's my brother. Not too difficult afterall.

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    1. Are you sure you don't have a bit of a sociopath in you?

      Well you are right sociopathy is afterall no cure for stupidity.

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  27. But you can beat a sociopath. As he learned you, you study him and they have weaknesses. It takes time to be sure but once you are inside him while he thinks he is playing you ... in the end he finds himself looking back in the mirror. I beat my sociopath boyfriend, trumped and done. And you leave with yourself intact.

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  28. "First of all, I find it incredibly humorous that there are people on this site claiming to be sociopaths actually giving advice to empaths. The irony is immaculate."

    Do your research sir:
    http://www.sociopathworld.com/2010/08/psychopaths-feel-emotions.html

    Was she diagnosed as a sociopath by a professional or by you?

    Can you beat a true sociopath? I think you're playing with fire if you try. It's self destructive, dangerous and you might not be the only one who gets hurt in the process.

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  29. ***When a sociopath victimizes another person, they victimize the community***


    Do any of you realize the damage these people are responsible for? Do any of you understand that it not only affects your life...it shapes it?
    Almost all of you take the attitude that the best remedy is to "get out" and "save yourself". WTF is wrong with people...As long as it's not in your backyard right? I sincerely hope I am alone in realizing that every time a sociopath "feeds" themselves they leave a shell of a person in their wake...a person who may have had a lot to offer their community in terms of love, productivity, responsibility etc. Instead, we are left with what often amounts to a disabled or handicapped person who will require time, effort and energy from their community, as well as precious resources (money, meds, etc.) to get back on their feet. Further, that victim is not living in solitude....they are responsible for all of the things people are responsible for. They are parents, teachers, accountants, doctors, and so on. In other words, they are IN YOUR LIFE and are part of your community. When a sociopath victimizes another person, they victimize the community..their are ripple effects and damage continues long after the sociopath has moved on.

    I'm not going to make any suggestions or encourage anyone to take any particular course of action...I just want to express my concern and hopefully inspire all of you to consider something that may not have of occurred to you.

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    1. Well you the thing is that individuals usually don't care about the community as long as it doesn't affect their lives and thats why its so easy to manipulate them. Behind all of the charade they are all motivated by the "ugly" base human emotions.

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    2. You forgot to mention the suicides.

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  30. One Bad Apple~

    If anyone is interested in why sociopaths, or any other type of "toxic" personality are so destructive to our community and our lives in general, here is a quick link to a search that has plenty of links to studies and resources.

    One Bad Apple *kind of makes you want to get out there and DO something*

    (Google search for "one bad apple" + psychological study)

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  31. Anon said, "every time a sociopath "feeds" themselves they leave a shell of a person in their wake...a person who may have had a lot to offer their community in terms of love, productivity, responsibility etc. Instead, we are left with what often amounts to a disabled or handicapped person who will require time, effort and energy from their community, as well as precious resources (money, meds, etc.) to get back on their feet."

    This does not occur "every time".

    I am sure there are situations wherein a person of weak constitution, who has little to fall back on, may become a basket case.

    Conversely, there are people who are able to carry on their lives very effectively with minimal damage to themselves, and none to the people with whom they come into contact with.

    It's not accurate to make such dramatic, generalized statements.

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  32. You are wrong. It is rational to make such a strong statement. They most certainly destroy, unforgivablely, without remorse. They prey on weak, kind individuals...many times with some sort of abusive past. So for you to say, "People can just brush it off" shows your complete lack of understanding of what a sociopath really does to decent human beings. They don't feed on the type of human who "brushes it off" they feed on those who can't or won't.

    My father was a sociopath and he died alone and miserable, deservingly so. My brother was twice diagnosed as a sociopath, so to no surprise I ended up marrying one. I didn't realize what men should be like. I may never understand what a man should be like, I mostly think I may already be too far gone to save.

    After a long miserable failed relationship, I realized all of what I already knew, but now - with a diagnosis finally attached to this demonic creature I had the misfortune of marrying. I'm not going to explain my sad story. Just the most important part. He ruined my faith in human beings. To realize people like that live among us is a feeling worse than death to someone like me. They most definitely destroy communities. They're completely worthless, wastes of lives. Anything else said here to the contrary is either a sociopath playing games or an empathic person feeling pity for them. For all that said, "feel pity"...no. Like the Sociopath Next Door states, sympathy should be reserved for disaster victims. The ONLY thing you can do is run, you can't save the community....although it nearly warmed my heart that a person with a soul would try, as foolish as that is. They aren't psychotic and you can't lock them up most the time, it's not a disease like cancer. They simply don't feel. They are just plain hollow. Pity is undeserved and wasted on such worthless human beings. But in the end, they will shoot themselves, failed creatures...all of them. Just remember without conscience there can be no good.

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  33. Sooooo, I have a question?? I don't know if folks are still commenting on this post or not, but I would love to get some insight on this one? My ex sociopath defininately lacked emotion on many levels, however, the one time I "broke him down" was when I decided it was time for payback... After I found out he had a whole entire relationship with another woman, of course I did the (as u would so eloquently put it) typical "empath" rant trying to appeal to his concsience, cried, yelled, screamed, cursed while he was the one who called me crazy and remained totally aloof as usual. I waited a week, and slashed all of his tires and when he text me (because you sociopaths are really cowards by nature and wouldn't have the balls to actually face your victim in a confrontation) I acted just as aloof and ignored him just as he would always act with me. I pissed him the hell off and although negative, he was finally passionate and obsessed with talking to me and seeing me, and apologizing for his wrongs... At the end of the day, I think he was either A) trying to get back on my goodside so I wouldn't destroy anymore of his property, or B) just for one moment his conscience kicked in and he wanted to clear it... Any feedback???

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    1. He simply enjoyed making you lose control followed by your pretending to feel no remorse. He made you like him. He created hell. Sad.

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  34. C) None of the above.

    You became interesting again, so he became interested. He'd probably just become bored with you before that, and he'll probably get bored again.

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  35. Interesting... What's sad is that you're absolutely correct... He did become "bored" again and I fell into the trap again... Got caught up again. I have not tried to contact him for 3 months now and vice versa, because I finally hit my "bottom" with him and tried to take my own life. He knows it too and no surprise that there was no remorse and fake sincerity when approached by my family members...Another question and maybe it is answered somewhere in the abyss of this site, but why is the sex so epic?? That seemed to be the only other time he was passionate with me?

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  36. And will he eventually try to come back and "finish me off"???

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  37. Honestly? It's probably the noises you make or something like that. The sex part of sex is really the least entertaining bit in my mind. I just like those silly faces and lovely noises people make when it's done right.

    On another level, it may just be a part of his reading of you. He knows what you want, so he gives it to you (in more ways than one ;) ).

    If you have any other questions, feel free to click on my name and email me or somesuch. This thread is long dead, so you won't get much response beyond mine.

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  38. If you mean finish you off like kill you, probably not... unless you keep slashing his tires.

    If he's bored with you, he'll probably just erase you from his life. It's unlikely, then, that he'll do much else to you without provocation.

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  39. You have answered my questions sufficiently.Good times... Thanks...

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  40. Replies
    1. Hey socio,
      Any chance of a bit of help? Even if for amusement value! I've been involved with 1 for 6 months, my own fault as knew he weren't right so didn't love him or anything, guess I was playing him too just for sex as it was good and suited me. And the drama was entertaining. Anyway the twat won the game in a very underhand, scumb bag way! really pissed me off. Ok to the point, he thinks I really didn't n dnt know what he is n that I believed everything, which I honestly didn't. So I do take responsibiltiy as I should have known better n stayed away, however, is it worth me pointing this out? I have ignored him for the last 6wks n he's still texting emailing ect, v determine to get dialog going with me, think my silence is driving him mad. He's tried loads of different strategies. Shall I point out the truth n that I'd always known in a calm amused fashion, or leave it be? At the mo he jet thinks I'm stupid (which I have been) but he thinks I had n have no clue which isn't true! Would make me feel better to laugh n point this out, but will I create an enemy? Look forwards to yr response, ps I dnt hate this guy, pissed off with myself lol oh yeah, would b good for me to know that he knows I view it / him with humour n not hurt, thank u in advance!

      Delete
    2. Oh yeah, just a foot note on the posting before / above. I did / have covered bases on his scummy trick. I informed the cops who have wrote it up n now have intelligence on him (should anything further) happen there's a record and statement waiting. I've kept messages he's sent, told couple of respected people so if he tries to manipulate blackmail or illicit postings there is a paper trail. So I have covered my ass so to speak ) thoughts, ? Thanks

      Delete
  41. "One Bad Apple"

    Remember when we KNEW that "black people" were property and not really "human" like white people...or that women weren't intelligent enough to vote..and of course the absurd notion that a wife should have the right to refuse sex with her husband...some ridiculous people even went so far as to try to suggest that a husband could actually rape his own wife and that it should be a crime...

    Of course those ideas and beliefs are only things we read about in history books these days, and of course if YOU had been around "back then" YOU would have NEVER gone along with it...YOU would have been the one to make a stand and fight the system right?

    For anyone and everyone who believes that we should run and hide from these predators, just take a moment and consider what would be if that same thought process was applied by everyone throughout history...

    To do nothing about evil is to be it's accomplice...

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  42. So what do you recommend they do, then? Put us all on an island? Execute us for nothing more than brain chemistry? Good luck with that, friendo.

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    1. Yes!..In a Utopian world you and every other psycho would live on an island unto yourselves unable to escape to harm those of us with a conscience..A girl can dream can't she :^)

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    2. Trained volunteers should keep you busy for years so you do no real harm to others.

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  43. Postmodern...if I were to make assumptions based on the "tone" of your comment, my words apparently struck a nerve with you? But I won't make that assumption as I am not you and I have no idea what motivated your comment. If my post doesn't sit well with you, I'd really like to know why. I made no mention of "an island" or "executing" anyone...what gave you that notion?

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  44. I should have made my sarcasm clearer, I see. Ah, well.

    Anyway, your proclivity for ellipses is reminiscent of certain polemicists who use them to allow extremists to fill in their own personal punishment.

    Just playing.

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  45. Postmodern...

    "fill in their own personal punishment"

    Lol, without a doubt the best thing I've read in a long long time... no sarcasm, I'm serious.

    Thank you for the response...sometimes the smallest gestures or expressions can have more significance than one realizes or intends. Your humor and what I interpret as an act of "goodwill" gives me pause for thought. Two things occur to me... things I need to reflect on before I release them into the world with an enthusiastic slap on the ass ;)

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  46. Replies
    1. Oh and by the way do you know about any thread that isn't dead? Cuz this is getting boring and people are kind of starting to loop.

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  47. How many sociopaths does it take to screw in a light bulb...

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  48. 5. One to decide it needs to be screwed in, one to devise a plan to do it, one to create a website announcing it, one that's gonna take over screwing it in as well as take over the world once its done, one to supply the redbulls, one to bring the books on philosophy... Wait, what were we doing again???

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  49. I had just finished dating a guy who is a sociopath. I didn't know if from the start, but being the empath that I tend to be, I tried to make a "soul-tie" with the individual (willfully connecting my emotional energies with theirs). I could not believe that there could be a person on this Earth that I could not feel emotionally! Then it hit me that this guy was incapable of any sympathy (which he told me on several occasions) When I did begin to empathies with his emotional state, I found myself feeling cold and dark. Almost an evil feel about myself. I thought "Is this really what it feels like in his skin?" We dated for a few more weeks and the lies became apparent. I think he thought that he had me fooled but he was inconsistent with things he said days before. I could never say that I "beat" him in so many ways, but I do know that sociopaths tend to want to be in control of their victims. He threatened to call the police to have them escort me out of his house after he invited me in to berate me. I took the bait because I decided at that moment I would call the shots. He asked me to leave I told him no 3 times. He never did call the cops, he changed tactics in order to appease me. He feigned human emotions until I had to leave for work.

    I guess my point is: It is hard to outsmart a sociopath, especially if you have had minimal experience with them. They will always leave you wounded, no matter their "good" intentions or not. If you are the stubborn type, the best approach is to assert dominance providing you feel safe doing so. Sociopaths hate confinement, they love their freedom of choice, and to find more puppets for their show.

    My truest belief is that an empath can beat out a sociopath. Empaths are guided by emotions which sociopaths lack. )If any other empaths are like me, they can also pick up other peoples personality traits.) An Empath can become a sociopath if damaged enough. But a sociopath rarely ever reform to human status.

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    1. They are utterly ridiculous. I married one and have a few in my family(divorced now for 11 years) One can keep attracting them to you if you are not careful. I have dated an older man thinking he was safe. HE turned out to be one, and then I finally found and researched this disease. I am truly an empath. I never knew there was a name or meaning to this issue. I wish I had this knowledge years ago. Too bad the advent of the internet came too late for me.

      I just want to say I have spent a good portion of my life trying to please, serve and read their next move. All the while, not knowing what prehistoric animals they are. They feed off of your misfortune and they create your misfortune. So, to have an accidental 'misfortune' is really governed by them. It's a ruining of your life, and they control each and every aspect of this ruination. I wish I could say I'm perfect, but I have to be introspective at this time and look within to see why I am compassionate towards evil. Pure evil. No contact is the best solution, if it's a boyfriend, etc. Trying to match wits with this monster will take your focus off of you, and life is too short for that. I know, I tried, and one conclusion, you can't match wits with the devil. No contact is best to recover.

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    2. I will pray for you tonight.

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  50. How do you deal with a man who is a sociopath if you have a child by him?

    - Just wondering

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  51. hah yeah ive vowed to get back at the SP's i know, destroy them especially one-- oh never happens..u can't beat a devil at it's own game--they are terrorizing demons in my opinion--so evil cruel...manipulative--monsters on another level--if u try they will torment u more...show you they can beat you....after my SP has tortured me 3 years---in so many cruel awful ways...finally it has gotten to me...and im so upset--yet i can't beat him---he always wins...causes me extreme suffering and puts me through hell...i can never win...i suffer and he has done horrid things such as having charges pressed on me false ones b/c even the system supports and helps out these sick predators...oh and never give them any money---yes its hard to not get manipulated by these freaks but never...also its not your fault--this stupid evil society tells victims its their fault---everyone blames victims.. its a society designed to let predators destroy others...
    people are so sick....even after they've abused you and you've been through hell-- they still manage to torment you for fun. My parents have stolen 10,000 from me, put me in debt with the govt 12k...ruined my life in many ways....im not frustrated ive suffered horribly---in so many ways by many people....and for it i get a sh*tty mean sister in law sitting there drilling me while we're out to dinner, insulting me while my mean sick mother is sitting there egging her on---they've drained all my good...and they still want to take more....and torment me more-- u think....these psychopaths stop when they've drained you compeltely but they just keep going...everyone these days defends abusers---they are evil backwards sick...i think evil has taken over people these days....95% of people are mean sick in the head and will do evil to others...its a horrible society with awful people....sociopaths can do anything they want and get away with it

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  52. the SP i suffer with has power/control over me more so also because he is an energy vampire-- he does some scary and powerful things to me metaphysically--black magic etc...so he's always assuring himself dominance over me. It's a hell i cant describe and nightmare...and to try to defeat him...he is slowly destroying me after he already has and he too would invite me over and then kick me out, threaten the police on me--for 3 years...it was a nightmare--threats, abuse physical violence, extreme mental torture and awful mind games, severe abuse mistreatment...pressing charges on me, ruining my life...he refused sex with me ever...refused to really be around me but have me over then kick me out...it was mental torture just to get there, on my way there...i had to dress a certain way, he called me his 'whore' puppet, slut, a piece of shit wh*re, would charge me money to see him, was sadistic cruel so evil...he claimed he owned and controlled me...new year's day he had me over to get me drunk so that he could go to his next door neighbors place- who is a male...he knew i would freak out...since i assume hes bi and is prbly there for who knwos what--he whined that i never got drunk so i did..then i barged in there and got upset--for that--he kicked me out of his place...while he neighbor was banging on his window yelling "AFTER ALL I DID FOR YOU"!!! to him--wtf were these freaks doing?? then as he sent me home one hour i was driving drunk on teh dangerous highways while he and his 'neighbor' were calling me laughing at me and mocking me...I heard orgasming in the background...i drove back out of fear of being alone new year's...and drunk...then i stayed up all night in front of a tv alone..while he woke up periodically to kick me out then kicked me otu the next morning then after i left, harassed me to come back otherwise he said he'd ruin my life, post pics of me, call my work and lie about me, call the cops..after an hour...i painstakingly went back to get pictures he took of me which he lied and claimed there on a drive he gave me but laughed and said he didn't...i said i was getting a RO on him and he threatned to put a bullet in my head if i did--when i drove back after driving an hour home, he then kicked me out again with no pictures...when i refused to leave, he began throwing trash on me making me scream and pushed me into a closet--a guy walked by in his neighborhood and he tried to pick him up...and gave him al this extra attention.. i got furious like u acnt control urself for an hour after forcing me to come back?? then he kicked me out...again and i had to drive home an hour-- though he has terrorized me like this numerous times this was the last straw--with a SP this is what happens in the span of less than 24 hours--it is horror...so bad and i vowed never to go back tihs time and havent so far, but being an energy vampire he torments me daily and laughs about it...it is disturbing stuff but stay away from tehse monsters, predators....there is no way of getting back at them and if you can good for you---they are so bad sick evil cruel...and other evil people will vouch for these monsters and lunatics...

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  53. another thing u will learn is tha the humans of day-- love sociopaths...most are psychopaths and like to side with evil-- even if they know the person is doing evil---so if your sociopathic abuser wants to ruin your life--he/she will have a horde of 'decent citizens' by their side aiding them in their evil games...sounds too crazy to be true--its the sad and sick reality and what ive experienced with many different sociopaths--many sick ppl these days seem to enjoy doing evil...and worse they will say to the victim...oh you're crazy, u think everyones out to get you-- WHILE they are tormenting abusing and screwing with that person...they will gaslight with people and try to drive them to who knows what--their cruelty and evil is so sick and disturbing...but dont think that b/c u are being ruined by a predator that john or linda down the street will help you....no way...they will aid the sociopath predator in ruining you--there are so many cruel bad people out there today its surprising...adn so many are either socios psychopaths narcissists or something evil or sick and if u arent like 'them'...ie u are a kind caring empath---they will do anything to destroy you in so many awful ways....and will have many other humans by their side ready to do some seriously cruel things to you...

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  54. How to win against a sociopath? Give him what he pretends to want, in ways that don't give in to what he really wants. Make sure all of your dealings with him are seen and/or heard about by your social circle. He'll have to constantly change his game up, and it'll be a challenge for him to maintain his reputation as he does so. Let him hammer the nails in his own coffin, or let him decide it's not worth destroying his image and walk away. Worst case scenario, he starts being rational. As long as you play your cards right, you win every time.

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  55. I would 1st off like to point out that some of the empaths seem extremely bitter. U shouldn't be. Just use it as a learning edxperience. Fact is most empaths ENJOY the drama. They enjoy the challenge of trying to fix the unfixable in hopes to be the 1st person to make socios feel anything. My best friend is an extreme empath and I am a touch sociopathic (I refuse to actually label it without a professional diagnosis) and we use each other. She uses me because, as a psychology major, I facinate her and I use her to have someone who can understand me. When we 1st met, we had alo in common and we decided to be honest with each other because neither of us feel understood. She quite clearly explained to me that she is an empath and allows herself to go through things with people who have aspd and npd because if her life were normal she wouldn't know what to do. I am completely analytical as is she and we are able to communicate our actions for the other to further understand. Its difficult for me to be that honest with someone but I feel it will benefit me in the future so I am. I only hurt people who try to hurt me. My ex thought he could play the hot and cold game with me so I carefully planned out my actions and proceeded to teach him a thing or two about messing with me. To this day I am confident that even though I broke him down and made him feel misserable he would take me back. I have always tried to teach each *empath* that you can't controll us, you can't move us, and most importantly the only way to win is cut your losses. Don't be bitter because you lost. Just chalk it up to a lesson learned.

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  56. Furthermore most of you so-called empaths speak clearly of ur knowledge of the *evil sociopath* yet you also state you can't get away. That is what makes you weak. If you know someone is going to steal, would you attempt to stop it? You might, I could care less. Point is, if you see it happening and don't do anything its not cause u can't, there's nothing stopping you. You just choose not to. Also, your need to exact revenge is a little pathetic. Why? Because it shows that you still care about us and further gives us the comfort of knowing we are all important in your thoughts.

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  57. there is one effective way to beat a sociopath; with an iron bar.

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  58. Jesus christ, you all are just pitiful.

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  59. Well They (Sociopaths) would be Laughable ...but it's just not funny. They have been around forever. We are the sheep and they are the wolves ...And Yes they are pathetic and have the upper hand. I found that its Harder to cry than Rage. So Really How great are they ?...Incomplete as far as I can tell ...Lacking .

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  60. I believe my sister is BPD, NPD, and Sociopath. I was her object of hatred growing up. I guess I did learn to 'beat' her at her own game but the effort was so unpleasant that it was little better than 'losing' to her. By the time I was 13 or so I realized that she had an MO "Just find out what little sister likes or wants and take it away from her - then, dine on her sadness and tears"
    1. She was always given priority or the right to choose because she was a year older. I could live with that but I didn't understand it. What bothered me is she wanted to watch me suffer over the choices she made. It was as if she would not enjoy it unless I perceived it as a terrible loss. So, when it came time to 'choose our rooms' in a new house, I knew I neither of us wanted one of the rooms. So I pretended to want it. This was alien to me - it felt like my face would crack when I tried to say that I was fine with the 'other room'. She studied me with disbelief so I acted like I had no interest in the conversation and as if I found her interest puzzling. She wanted the 'good room' and I wanted the 'bad room' so what was the problem? I walked away and she would sort of prod me over the next few days. The hardest part of this deception was trying to express interest and views I did not really have because I had no practice. I don't think I was as convincing as I should have been - my delivery was flat and a little faltering. Something awful about bending the muscles in my face to express pleasure in the thought of being given the room I hated so much. She accused me of being deceptive and I calmly accepted it "Ok, I don't see what the problem is, we are each getting what we want. Just leave me alone about it..." She asked me why I wanted the bad room. I had thought about this - it had to be reasons that would appeal to her - she would never pause to test whether my stated reasons appealed to ME; my wants and needs didn't matter to her so she couldn't' reference them when she needed to. She was known to pick up the phone extension and listen in on calls (the only family member to do this). I said, "well...I mean...I think it COULD be interesting because the phone is right there (near the bad room) and I would not hear alot but I think I could hear a little more than I do now..." She was unable to use the fact that I was an insomniac who fought to go to sleep or sleep through noise to contradict this - I didn't matter so she didn't know how much I'd hate to be near a ringing phone. So she chose the 'bad room' and gloated in my face about getting it. I then had to feign disappointment I did not feel. I got the room I wanted but was disquieted and still am by how I had to feel in order to get it - my own face and voice felt so alien when faking it. So instead, I learned not to show at all what I favored or liked around her in order to escape that 'game'. Sometimes I pretended to be too stupid to understand her cruelty, leaving her to emphasize to me how she hurt or shafted me while I watched her with a vague and blank expression until she got angry and gave up. The most common one I used to deal with her was to avoid calling her on her lies and tricks because she would use this feedback to refine them. So by the time we were in our 20's she was quite obvious in many of her tactics because I had denied her useful feedback for 10 -15 years so she didn't use her 'A' game on me and often underestimated others as well believing we were all stupid. Sort of an emperor with no clothes.
    I am free now - she stopped speaking to me to 'teach me a lesson' (that I should confide in her more)and I never looked back. Uninhibited by conscience, she could outdistance most of us empaths easily in cold calculating logic - but she could not tell that I was concealing my feelings because she didn't have any herself so she often couldn't guess that mine were mysteriously absent.

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    1. Wow, The line "My wants and needs didn't matter to her, so she couldn't reference them" really hit me hard. Wish I knew that little button for survival. It's true, they think everything we empaths say is true because they don't really feel to deeply. Everything I told my sociopath was the truth until I found out everything he said was lies. Then, I too, said a little lie to him(all the while, not feeling good about it) to test the water, and he totally believed without question. I wondered why. Now I know why from your statement, as I mentioned above. Wow.

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  61. First, I will say that I am an empath. I got up this morning wondering how to contend with my son. He's diagnosed as bipolar/schizophrenic. He refuses to accept that anything is wrong with him. In spite of the fact that he is brilliant and resourseful he has made a shambles of his life. When all seems lost he gets incredible breaks at the last minute. I, always the optimist, keep feeling that if I keep the faith and keep standing by him that he will be okay. He has abused the love that his family has extended in the way of finances, lodging etc. His relationships end in disaster. Our money, time, health and more are beaten down. I got on the web to search for something about "empath, mother/ bipolar son" information. I started reading this blog and I was amazed. That's something that doesn't happen very often. I never suspected that my son was a sociopath as well. The behavior is exactly like others have described in their experiences. It's so difficult to understand someone not having a conscience when empaths feel all of the time. My son will say anything, almost do anything to have what he wants. I have come to a conclusion that there isn't anything I can do to help him. And now I'm at the point where some others have been. How do I separate myself from his issues without extreme measures? Some of the previous posted experiences have shed light on the severity of the problem. I love my child but others in the family have a right to happiness and peace of mind as well. I would like to release him on his path. I see now, that it won't be as easy as I might have previously thought. Just knowing about the sociopath angle has empowered me as well as bewildered me. I feel like I have something to work with at least. Hopefully others will stumble across this blog and see that it's not them who has the problem. Then maybe they too can escape the hell. Thanks to all.

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  62. An empath changing the way they react will mean nothing. As this is anonymous, I will have no problem telling you all I am a diagnosed sociopath. I was pushed in to see a psychiatrist by court order, I have since stopped going. Evidently I have been effectively "rehabilitated". I have enough experience with people to be able to recall similar situations and mimic my previous actions, alter what I say slightly depending on context, and in general do the exact same thing. As long as it's all vague, I can get away with it. Everybody around me is a fool, I have no problem with swinging them around. Some of them tend to enjoy the ride for a while.. that is, until I basically annihilate their dreams. Some guy flew out here to see me, spent a good $2000 in total, I didn't pay a penny. I promised him a lot. I met him once, decided I really couldn't use him for anything besides entertainment, and had a fellow APD-diagnosed friend call him, posing as my older brother. Told him we'd call the cops if he came near me again for harassment. It seems people will easily submit to the law..

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  63. I have studied psychology since childhood so I can know and mimic behaviors and function as a "normal" human being when the need arises. On top of that I've studied patterns of emotions, patterns of sexual attractions, etc. all for the same purpose. One person feeding false information would be the anomaly, not the rule.

    You have an interesting idea, a good concept. But not a real-world effective one,

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  64. 'One person feeding false information' has a greater impact if that person was your target of choice from childhood onward. She spent so much quality time focusing on me as if I were a prototype for others. Break me and then you'd have the 'keys' to breaking others whom you knew less, spent less time with because you knew the empath 'code' (or so she seemed to think).
    My impression was that she thought non-socios were inherently stupid and weak. My approach was 'ok - so I am stupid....too stupid to understand you...too stupid to be hurt by your cruelty etc." This technique worked on abusive customers (probably not socios) in retail - once they called me stupid I'd empty out my eyes and gently stare at them, wish them a good day as they stormed out etc. They couldn't complain about me to management because they'd have to scream "She told me to HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!"
    For socios not my sister - it still seems to have some uses because of that innate belief that non-socios are inferior. My friend's socio husband was working at destroying her. I coached her to conceal what matters to her so he would stop targeting those things. Her quality of life improved.
    There are anomalous humans and I just volunteer to be counted among them. Socios may decide that I am 'stupider' than the average empath - which is fine because then they underestimate me. So while I agree with your wise observation in part, I believe the socios own belief in his/her own superiority is the 'way in' when defending myself.

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    1. "Conceal what matter to her so he would stop targeting those things." That is brilliant!! Thank you!

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  65. I have a sociopathic boss. he broke me with overwork wrong footing false promises. I had a stress breakdown .
    I work for a large organisation and i intend to blow the whistle.
    I can't beat him but I am not prepared to have my career ruined.

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  66. Mmm. Yes, I understand that. My mother has borderline personality disorder, schizophrenia, etc. She forced homeschooling on me until I was fourteen and was my one and only influence when it came to nearly everything. A sociopath raised by an insane person. Didn't go so well

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  67. I just went through a 3yr marraige with a sciopath and believe me she was the most dangerious person ive ever had as apart of my life she was relenties on destorying me she didnt like that i was descent she hated when other though me nice and when i tired to be good to her and love her she used me and cheated and lied to me everyday she loved when i get upset it made her happy please do yourself a favor leave them alone for your own safty

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  68. I am not sure why people are trying to play games with these people, That to me makes no since these people are troubled and not in a way normal thinking can help.So why would you want to try and think that way and play games with them, I just got out of a relationship with one i married and
    i dont want to be abused or lied to or cheated on put though that kind of nighmare again.Look if you was wronged by one of these poeple do what that one guy said, let them be there own demise because they will there not going to stop being that way and. Karma has a way of making everyone pay when they do wrong and believe me it knows how to exsact revengage the best way on anyone.Dont get into a circle of trying to one up them normal people are going to be limtied to what they will do, because you care and have remorse for others. And unless you want to get read of that and become like one of them you wont be as successful at these games as they are and why would you want to? We are compalining about the unjust of there treatment towards others if we act like them why complain about it.Do what you want i got my life back after waisting it for the last 3yrs, ive lost money, jobs and even gottten arrested over this sciopathic women, but im not dead and i am moving on and lving mylife like i had before i met her. And removing the chance for someone like her to ever be apart of my life again so who really won. She and others like her are going to go throughout the rest of there life being who they are and the way they are, i can make my life happy and enjoy others who are worth giving my time and affection too. she and others like her are going to have to live there terrible version of life and suffer its exsistince. So why continue to give them power they dont deserve.Elenore Rosevelt said it best poeple can only make you feel as badly as you allow them too. Are these people worth allowing them interfering or controlling the rest of your life, well i say no and i refuse to allow anymore!

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  69. I too wasted 3+ years of my life,wasted lots of money, was also arrested because of her, and had my self-esteem thrown in the toilet. I can write a book about my adventures with my sociopath friend. I've read a lot on the subject but still don't understand it all and concerned over my desire to understand. I'm sure feelings for her are still there.
    I suppose even sociopaths don't all fit one mold. What I'm most curious about is what appears to be her obsession with one particular man, she refers to as a "rock". To me it almost seems like love, but from my reading it would be highly unlikely.She has known this man for many years and probably has wrecked his life a few times along the way. From my perspective he seems to call all the shots. I don't know if this is the ultimate match for her or really true love.

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  70. How do you out a sociopath who has gotten you charged with domestic violence, abused your child. Got human services involved and is claiming to be the victim. She was sent to therapy and now they think she's fixed just anxiety and domestic violence issues and are thinking of giving her back the baby? She has all these people bamboozled with her lies and manipulation. how do you end it so that they see what she really is before she hurts the baby again?

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  71. How to fight a sociopath -- and win!

    Win ? Hum ? That's really vague. Would depends on your own personal goals. Defeating ? Deceiving, maybe ? Aint no wining to be have. Actually, I think that, if you think you have won, in fact you probably lost. You lost your self. You have been steered in an other direction.
    One that was'nt even you own choice. You have been pulled in one direction that wasnt chosen by you but by your opponent. You may have beleived that you won. But still, the best way to really win, if I understand what you wanted, was revenge. You just been twisted. To truly win would be not to play period I would have to say. Revenge is not an option. You are has evil has your opponent. You lost.

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  72. I would have to agree with the last poster. The only way to really win is to not play. To simply refuse to expend any energy on the matter other than what you would to deal (personally) with yourself. Any time you let someone "get to you" and direct you toward action you wouldn't take normally in the situation, they are by definition leading you and as long as you ALLOW yourself to follow you are in the losing position. Remember the opposite of love is not hate it indifference.
    Actually, now that I think about it no one really wins because they too spend their time and energy on you. Usually at the point that things have gotten to where they are non-sociopath has an great motivation to just stop the relationship as they have more to gain and less to lose.
    So any continuation of the relationship, fighting or what have you means you have more to lose.

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  73. "The truth is that sociopaths are largely harmless. Just ask Andrew Bird. Sure, we may play with your minds a bit, but with me it's more like teasing than anything else."

    EXACTLY!!
    That's what I keep telling people all the time! ...And yet they prefer to believe the media and the story-cookers. All those bad things they say... *sigh*


    We LOVES you, M.E.! ;)

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  74. sociopaths will always be sociopaths and thats all, nothing more, they are pathetic excuses for human beings. empaths however can become phycopaths temporarily to deal with a sociopath ! then go back to being an empath, its called justice.

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  75. How do you deal with a sociopath if you have a child by him?
    - Just wondering

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  76. Harmless ? Again,that's vague. Define harmless. How about one gets to the point of wanting to kill himself. How harmless is that ? The ultimate goal is the death of your inner self. And beleive me, a true sociopath, makes it their ultimate goal. Nothing good here nothing at all. Here listen to this if you are one of them, might open a light somewere inside. But that would be a first. :)

    Marc

    https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1493391829522

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  77. An early remark stood out to me and i may be late to comment but your wrong, lying about your emotions is like lying about the weather. :) you just cant if your not experienced, like a sociopath.

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  78. re: lying to assholes about emotions- sheepaths can do it if they can act but there's little reason for them to do so especially if they don't know they're being bled yet, and when they find out they can't hide THOSE emotions. it's too strong. the cortisol is, uh, damaging, you know.

    re: lying in general - sheepaths can do it just fine. they just TEND not to do it as frequently or as boldly because they are afraid of the guilties, and also because they get nervous and screw it up whereas douche-o-paths don't have that problem, and rightly so for each. Each plays their best cards.

    @Vigiluis - mmmmmm aptly put but it's more fun if you identify the sociopath before they know who you are and then sabotage or otherwise mess with them anonymously. they deserve to be the subject of your ridicule if one of them has victimized you, right? I think so.

    re: identifying Annunaki bastards - All I know is exactly how it makes me feel when one of them approaches me. Dulled, now, of course, but still sort of there. It's that bright, happy, shallow "ooh he LIKES me!" feeling and it does nothing for me now which is great since they all use it straight away. The other change that has occurred in me following victimization and transformation to whatever the hell I am now is that I am always bored by them and their bs at first and I am the one who always hesitates in an unclear manner until conditions begin to resemble an opportunity to hurt a gross-io-path. Before, I was taken in from the beginning. I remember watching him charm others from the sidelines later. It was like watching a cartoon where a snake is hypnotizing a helpless little rodent, only this snake said the stupidest things and really they all do. It's something in their eyes that makes people believe it unless you can break it, and I have. I think it's mainly that I don't want anything now except for them to suffer as much as possible and they tend not to be able to read that very well. There is nothing they can become that will charm me because my hope is dead. I still FEEL, but I don't have dreams, so they cannot try to become some cheap shoddy imitation of what I want like what happened before. Now, my ideal mate would have sex with me several times a day and then shut the hell up and go somewhere else but not give me HIV, ever. This of course does not exist.

    Have no compassion for them. It will not behoove you.

    Kill all Annunaki.

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  79. Once again...the small minded, the narcissist, the writer has made me laugh and guffaw. You don't even know your doing it I bet, but you compare yourself to something better than empaths, than those that have complete and perfect wiring in our brains. You see, your brain is actually hardwired differently than a regular feeling person, your brain stores emotion in all the improper places making retrieval of it such a laborous and drawn own process it's nonexistant. basically your brain gives up trying to interpret the mess. in a way you're mentally retarded...you speak down to empaths because they have something you'll never have and it consoles you to think youre in some way greater. Empaths are complete people, REAL human beings with a REAL chance at divinity because they have the ability to LOVE. It consoles you to think that you're better because you lack so greatly the very essence of what it is to be closer to a god--human affection and emotion and the capacity to truly love. It angers you, you feel cheated by it, so you play dress up--just like you speak of empaths in that patronizing self-important way--like youre an other wordly being...the truth is youre a human that isnt human. there is nothing other worldy about you...youre actually mentally retarded...like an idiot savant if you will. so the next time you think youre playing an empath...be aware that some of us know how to play you while making you think youre successful in duping us the entire time. cheers

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  80. it can be pleasurable for a sociopath to play other sociopaths...I often do this..I have empathic ways of thinking down so well I can pretend to be the willing victim and draw another sociopath in to a little game..dressing up is all the more fun when I encounter another with the high-functioning awareness I have...It is the most explosively pleasurable thing in the world when you meet your match and win...


    --Arachne

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  81. I'm thinking of doing something drastic to my sociopath ex. Any suggestions?

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    1. I have fantasies of doing drastic things to my sociopath ex...I've had them for 18 years now...they are the only thing that keeps me from completely losing it. I just don't understand how he stays out of prison. Blows my mind...do something wrong, move three states away for two years and do it again????? use aliases... uhm... idk. I did a background check after 14 years of being tortured...the pages just kept coming...fourty five of them...i wonder how many now...do you think others are frightened too so just leave him be?????? I am thinking of sending rat poision in the form of LSD with his brothers name on the return label box. Good bye. I win. Finally peace.

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  82. Just leave him alone and get on with your life, if you act out of revenge and become like him, then he has won in destroying your humanity. Don't get me wrong I understand how you feel, a sociopath once completely destroyed me, and it took me years to get over it. The best revenge is to go on with things and live a happy life.

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  83. I have lately come to the conclusion that my wife is a sociopath, but very slowly I am taking apart her game. And she is starting to get nervous. She can feel the soil shifting under her feet, but doesn't know what is going on. I don't know if winning or revenge is the right word, but I am finding that my sociopath is riddled with anxiety about seeming normal. Everytime she does something out of the ordinary, something that might seem like others would think it was a psychiatric disorder, I gently point it out. I think the worst thing she's done is gotten me to behave a bit like her.

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  84. ...so basically your saying, she's bringing you down with her...? If you need to act like her in order to 'get to her' or 'mess with her'...you are stooping to her level of moral-retardation...if you really think your wife is a sociopath...get out now while you can! Don't let her make you into a shell of a man...even if you think you are 'winning'...your not...your just wasting your time and hence your life on her...a souless being...

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  85. ok listen the absolute best way to beat sociopath is this, first understand that you have no choice but to deal with the socio because of the situation for example you work with that person (i hate callin them people cuz there the closest thing to not being human) or there a family member or something. then limit it to just dealin with them only when nescarry if not run the other way have nothing to do with them. in my case i have to work this physco. Now the best absolute way to win is to do good, prosper and try to remain unaffected when the person is tryin to humiliate you upset you embarass you. you have to be prevenetive, and understand that person, know what there gonna do before they do it when you are in each situation so you know excactly how to act and to prevent it. also be silent dont ever let that person know your next move what your gonna in advance what your thinking and how you feel. It all can be used against you If that person does still manage to do get something by you DO NOT SHOW THEM YOU ARE BOTHERED THAT! Just use it as a lesson to yourself for next time the socio will see that got by you and try to use it in the future so expect it coming in advance. You can also have other people around you help you in your cause without having to explain to them excactly whats going on depending on the situation. for example at my job this socio girl puts the sandwich on the "to go" tray when its for here then me on the other side of the toaster wraps it up and realizes that the customer wants to eat it there makin me look like a total idiot like it was my mistake when it was the sociopathic girl who purposely did it for me to make the mistake. well theres another person next to her that also makes the sandiches and ill tell that person hey most of the trays are wrong can u you just make sure that the trays are correct before u send it thru the toaster befort it gets to my side and that person will catch pretty much most of the incorrect trays and if not ill catch the rest. this drives the socio girl crazy because she uses that as a tool to try and humilate embarass and upset me. Thats just one of the many things she does to try and destroy me so i have to stay on my toes be crafty creative and smarter. The socio girl hates to see when im doing good excelling at what i do and seeing me be happy. thats the ultimate win for me vs a sociopath but remember this is just my experience and situation. It sucks i have to do that everyday all the time at my job in order to collect a paycheck and pay my rent but its life i guess one day i hope this girl is gonna get what she deserves i just hope im around to witness it

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  86. I have fought a sociopath and won; it's not that gratifying. Pie is gratifying, as is getting a job, or understanding a conflict. Beating a sociopath is completely gratifying only whilst you are doing so; as you defeat each level you feel yourself unwittingly engaged in the sociopath's beloved game. Of course the sociopath loves the game more than you do; that is their weakness and their strength. They become so caught up in it, they don't realize when their opponent changes the rules, or decides they are through playing, and have given up on the relationship they thought they could eventually obtain. The sociopath is fighting for an anti-relationship, and rarely, it seems, bothers to consider their victim might decide it is a waste of time to convince them otherwise. Indeed when their opponent draws a line and says, "Either love me like I deserve to be loved or walk the plank," the sociopath is the one between a rock and a hard place--being incapable when it comes to the latter and unwilling when it comes to the former. At this point, the sociopath loses control--the one thing he or she cares about. When it ends you (the victim) realize the sadness of it all, and a damp sense of relieved melancholy is what is left. Yes, I did as this article advised, before ever having read it; not because I'm intelligent, but because I took enough time to study my sociopath because what said sociopath threatened to my world was enough for me to care. Now that the sociopath is gone, the remnants of pain this person inflicted on myself and a loved one is all that is left. I never loved this sociopath; I find it difficult to believe they can ever really truly be loved as no love on their part is ever sincerely expressed or present, for that matter.

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  87. The only way to truly defeat a sociopath is to become one yourself.

    They know this. They account for it in all they do, because if they do not get their satisfaction one way or another, they will die, or worse, even kill.

    Who knows how many serial killers' victims died not because they were too trusting, but because they denied their killer some trifling little victory?

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  88. To the above commenter; do you think your "sociopath next door" also resorts to such risky crimes in order to assert their dominion? Is a minscule triumph worth potential incarceration? Do sociopaths who have invested in blending into common society think enough in advance to realize the risk far outweighs the tiny satisfaction...that the risk of jail could throw all their hard earned willing victims/manipulated images out the window? I am not arguing that they wouldn't; I am genuinely asking...do sociopaths think of the consequences of asserting their power that has been undermined? I don't refer to the serial killers...I am speaking of your standard sociopath next door, whose career, marriage, and family have all been carefully fabricated to provide for the sociopath's deception of the social world.

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  89. Paranoia is a good point to start. Like an Anonymous on March 21 said, ask the sociopath about that potential disease, etc.

    In addition, there are some vulnerabilities in the sociopaths' strategy. The accomplices will become his/her victims in time, and s/he knows that. This means, they will become enemies. Throw a seed so they will start a witch hunt. His / her cardboard skycraper will disintegrate very fast.

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  90. I love how so many people think theirs is "the right way to beat a sociopath".

    The best advice I can give, is to leave. Remove yourself from the equation. That seems to work the most. Of course, it's also probably incredibly hard if they've got ties to you, such as children or family. But it's honestly the best option I can see that has a good chance of working most of the time.

    If you're really settled on revenge, the go ahead. Try deconstructing their lies yourself. You may win, but it's unlikely.

    But. If you're incredibly lucky and you know another sociopath who you're friends with (not all of us want to hurt everyone we meet), especially a high-functioning one, they have the best shot at kicking your enemy sociopath's ass at their own game. Because your friend sociopath KNOWS the game, and can play it better than you ever could. They might be able to help you, especially if you make it seem like it would be a conquest of theirs.

    Hope this helps. Remember, we may all fit into some kind of group or another (sociopath; empath; normal; ect.), but everyone is different. I'm sure we've all learned that what works on one empath certainly doesn't work on every empath. You guys need to learn the same about us.

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  91. I was never happy with my husband as our marriage was based on lies from him.I liked the facts of one of the blogger that sociopaths always attack weak,honest and with some sort of childhood neglect.I met my bastard husband at the age of 28.he pretended to be extremely charming and highly educated when he saw me in a high profession. he made me trust him.V.sadly I found him as a pure liar, stupid and cheater. I never fell in love with him after the truth. he was able to separate me from my family.I just found last year that he is a pure Narcissist. I am stuck with a 07 year old sweat child.Oh the worst of all, took millions out of me over 10 years with a promise to return.i am now suffering from sress related illnesses.some suggestions please.

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  92. =O how do i get tested? My hsuband says i am, but i've only been tested for stds. LOL JK. I hate all the comments above. so negative

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  93. >The truth is that sociopaths are largely harmless

    they control virtually all the power in this world.

    most of the population have strong sociopath tendencies.

    they sanction overtly and covertly the mass murder, genocides and other large scale mass murders in human history.

    the political, military/intelligence, educational, business and religious institutions are dominated by sociopaths.

    most americans are no different than the germans were during hitlers time.

    most americans wake up each day never caring about the murder and torture at facilities like quantanamo bay all around world.

    those 30 thousand plus politicians are no where to be seen or heard.

    the families of the 911 victims are pointing the finger at the US government for the 911 mass murders. most americans are too indifferent to the truth hence human life..

    most empaths trying to spot sociopaths will be too compromised to confront the sheer number of sociopaths around them. they want to believe it is just a few bad apples. their minds live too much in the matrix.

    the empaths are a small minority on this planet

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  94. >they sanction overtly and covertly the mass murder, genocides and other large scale mass murders in human history.

    there are active and passive ones

    the passive ones are the unseen fuel from where most of the violence in the world.

    going along with a big lie is a way of life. they are bonded to the hip to the powers that be by their nature. they will delude themselves if they have to in order to maintain the lie.

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  95. sociopaths can be empaths as well. some can read you like a book, and proceed to rewrite your story until you don't know what's real and what's not.

    it's a fun game. and life is just a ride. deal with it.

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  96. When a person who is a sociopath studies neuroscience and psychology and has a very high iq, they will not only know that ur stupid enough to believe ur fooling them, but will play along and lead u into a trap... Which will not only be amusing to them, but they will point out ur mistakes to see ur reaction.
    U betray a sociopath, the dynamic changes from enjoying the positive effect they create, to bathing in the suffering they can bring psychologically... without a flinch or slight aversion from the semi-planned, semi on on-the-fly and progressive interactions. At the same time, being able to switch off from it when necessary.
    This book is a toy for people to feel empowered wrongly.
    U can not "win" in a moral situation, u are either decent or harmful...
    Does anybody else see the irony of this poor attempt at literature?

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  97. Sometimes the best you can do is to just get away. A desire to win at any costs is the hallmark of the sociopath.

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  98. Trying to beat a sociopath is usually not worth it at all. But the thing about feeding wrong information works, specially if they underestimate you.
    But your strategy(here as in life in general) is dependent on the situation, on what you have, on what your cards are.
    I was in a situation once where we(me and the sociopath) knew a person in common. This person had the very subtle habit of, when gossiping or reporting what others told about something she felt was important, telling it using the exact same words, like a record, only changing from first to third person. But I bet hardly anyone ever noticed this about her, because one would have to be paying a kind of attention hardly anyone does.
    So I told her something in a very emotive context, knowing she would tell him even though having promised me not to, and choosing carefully my words(so I would hear them from his mouth later).
    You guys can figure out the rest. It worked, and opened a path to more tricks. He would even mimicry her way of fooling me(in her mind of course) when he wanted me to believe something.
    I was crushed in the very end anyway though.

    I think 'fighting a sociopath' just may be the dirtiest possible kind of war. And one you must fight stealth, unless you fully accept the possible necessity of doing whatever it takes and managing to sleep at night(I simply can't do that). That's why, if I ever realize what I got myself into again, I'll just get away, cut my losses and avoid playing the game altogether as much as possible.

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  99. Trying to beat a sociopath is usually not worth it at all. But the thing about feeding wrong information works, specially if they underestimate you.
    But your strategy(here as in life in general) is dependent on the situation, on what you have, on what your cards are.
    I was in a situation once where we(me and the sociopath) knew a person in common. This person had the very subtle habit of, when gossiping or reporting what others told about something she felt was important, telling it using the exact same words, like a record, only changing from first to third person. But I bet hardly anyone ever noticed this about her, because one would have to be paying a kind of attention hardly anyone does.
    So I told her something in a very emotive context, knowing she would tell him even though having promised me not to, and choosing carefully my words(so I would hear them from his mouth later).
    You guys can figure out the rest. It worked, and opened a path to more tricks. He would even mimicry her way of fooling me(in her mind of course) when he wanted me to believe something.
    I was crushed in the very end anyway though.

    I think 'fighting a sociopath' just may be the dirtiest possible kind of war. And one you must fight stealth, unless you fully accept the possible necessity of doing whatever it takes and managing to sleep at night(I simply can't do that). That's why, if I ever realize what I got myself into again, I'll just get away, cut my losses and avoid playing the game altogether as much as possible.

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  100. My soon to be ex is a Socio. I've told him he was before but he refuses to admit that he in different from other except for that he is more intellegent. He once told me that he feels like the entire world is an illusion, like the people around him are made up characters who don't actually exist. I think this is why everything is sort of a "game". I get the same feeling sometimes but in a whole different way. I feel that empaths take that very same feeling into a good place. Like we are all god, the same entity experiencing from different veiws. So in a way it is all an illusion and there is only one of us. This is why the socio envys us (Just my thoughts, i may be wrong). But it's true socios are easily manipulated and clearly helpless which is why the feel the need to seek out power.

    One night my socio decided he wanted me to submit but i didn't care to play the game anymore. "Say your done!" he said sturnly with wide eyes. We had been play fighting but he had to win even that. I would not respond, I pretended not to care at all that he wanted the last word. I dropped everything & ignored him, but he wanted me to verbally admit to defeat. For the next ten minutes he'd hit me, say hurtful things, pull my hair & swear at me, but I could tell he was the one suffering. Evertime I wanted to scream, I would just laugh, like his efforts to break me were an amusing joke. Knowing that he couldn't break me without disfiguring me, he cowarded like I had never seen before. It's like the roles had switched entirely. Instead of me wallowing in my sarrow under the blankets like I'd normally be after a fight, he was instead. Growing up in school our parents & teachers must have been on to something. If a bully eggs you on, act like your untouched, better yet, amussed by their attempts to put you down, you'll beat them at their very own game.

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  101. I came to this site believing that sociopaths were misunderstood sufferers who society should adapt to integrate better. I am not a believer in punishment or imprisonment. However, the more posts and comments I read from sociopaths here, the more deeply I am convinced that sociopaths must be banned, or perhaps more forcefully eliminated from any society that hopes to function. Especially those who try to justify their hateful, disgusting outlook on others by saying they just want to tell us Santa is real (never heard of the Crusades?), or trying to shift the blame for their physical and emotional violence, like "everybody throws their cat around" or "who would allow a conversation to move to a topic they can't control?".

    This is why there is so little sympathy for sociopaths. There may well be a shining few who try to use their special abilities to help people, but by and large you guys seem intent on exploiting our sympathy for your personal pleasure. The more time I spend here, the less inclined I am to show sympathy to sociopaths. That makes me sad, because I am not neurotypical either and I want to find something redeemable in you guys. I am beginning to think that a healthy society (obviously a hypothetical conceit to begin with) will be forced to ban sociopaths, leaving them to terrorize each other somewhere else.

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    1. I like the Inuit's very effective approach to dealing with socio/psycopaths. But better still for the sake of justice would be to, as you say, "...ban sociopaths, leaving them to terrorize each other somewhere else." They ultimately drive each other craz(ier).

      http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=what-psychopath-means

      Psychopathy seems to be present in both Western and non-Western cultures, including those that have had minimal exposure to media portrayals of the condition. In a 1976 study anthropologist Jane M. Murphy, then at Harvard University, found that an isolated group of Yupik-speaking Inuits near the Bering Strait had a term (kunlangeta) they used to describe “a man who … repeatedly lies and cheats and steals things and … takes sexual advantage of many women—someone who does not pay attention to reprimands and who is always being brought to the elders for punishment.” When Murphy asked an Inuit what the group would typically do with a kunlangeta, he replied, “Somebody would have pushed him off the ice when nobody else was looking.”

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  102. I have found the best way to beat a sociopath is to have neither sympathy, remorse nor guilt when dealing with them. And if you are considered an extremely truthful and reputable person, exposing them helps, also... less people to manipulate and take advantage of.

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  103. I've often wondered if a lot of the Arab world is made up of sociopaths. They seem to have no feelings for their daughters when they kill them for disgracing them, for some silly reason. They kill others so easily for their own political games. I've seen mothers dance up and down when they've heard their child has just committed a suicide bombing. Talk about no feelings. These people seem to fit the mold perfectly. Then there is Obama who can take 30 jets to India when there are people here who have no food or place to live. He definitely is a sociopath. I have an ex-daughter-in-law who is a sociopath and is now raising my grandchildren. Of course she won custody. What else would one expect? My son came so close to comitting suicide, before he was rescued. And who did they call to the hospital? The sociopath, of course. Sociopaths can be the most distructive people on earth. Stay away from them. You can't win.

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  104. I'm rather insulted, actually. We may have early developmental issues mimicking emotions, but at least for high functioners, we're much better at recognizing lies due to an advantage of sheer amount of time spent practicing. And no, before you ask, I am not a serial killer or any such thing. In fact, I'm a small time biologist at a university lab.

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  105. I've known a sociopath for over 9 years and they are the manipulative and deceitful type who hurt others and destroy lives. If you want to beat them at their own game its a long up hill battle.

    Only fight a sociopath if you know you can win. As you have to have friends/family who trust and side with you like no other. The more devious and sharp witted the sociopath the more trust you'll need to rally to counter them. As a sociopath will go behind your back at every opportunity to tarnish your reputation and sow the seeds of mistrust between your friends/family and the people around you.

    At the time you realize/suspect(in some cases) someone is a sociopath,

    CEASE THE SHARING OF ANY AND ALL PERSONAL INFORMATION!
    (Anything and everything you share with them will ultimately be used against you when the sociopath no longer feels that you are of any use them them)

    If it can't be avoided keep conversations to bare minimum and keep them mundane, small talk ect. Also, never share anything that could endanger you or your friends, You wouldn't show your hand in a game of poker so why would you in real life, when the prize is exposing them for the emotional fraud they are.

    Deny them what they desire most from their victims(and/or you) and bring their inconsistencies and deceit to light for those around you if possible. Denying them their pleasures in life will pain them, causing them to do something stupid to catch you out. If executed well they'll be sprung by their own trap and everyone will see just how right you were in warning them of the sociopath.

    Denying them can be done in a number of ways depending on how they try to target their victims;
    In my case it was constant provocation and harassment in conversation with friends. Trying to trash talk me to get a response. You either have to be more witty with a response and everyone will laugh at the sociopath or you ignore them entirely like they mean nothing to you and aren't even there. A combination of both achieved good results in my case.

    If the sociopath has infiltrated/stalked you or your friends, eg, Facebook or the local pub, Plan events with friends outside of these channels. This way when they hear you and your friends reminiscing about such awesome events that they felt they had the god given right to be involved in, they will become obsessively jealous, increasing the likelihood they will do something drastically stupid. The result usually being a moment of self destruction whilst trying to make you look bad as they open their mouth and release all doubt so to speak.

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  106. i have been "fighting" with, or maybe negotiating with, a sociopath for quite some time without knowing what i was really dealing with. now that i know, i realize a fight is useless. the best way to "win" is to walk away and live your life. all else just keeps you entangled in their world.

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  107. First of all, some of us know right off the bat that we are dealing with an idiot that has no concern for the consequences of their actions. So we can skip past how to spot one. Number two, some of us want nothing to do with the nut at the outset, and try to avoid the malevolent creature, but to no avail. Number three, the boneheaded cops will arrest those of us who hurt one of these creeps in self defense, we're supposed to roll up in a ball and wait for the cops who will release the creep on bail as soon as money makes its appearance. Keep in mind that the sociopath could care less whether his/her actions will result in his/her own arrest. That's what makes them tough to deal with, they simply don't care while their victims do. You don't have to be some self loathing loser with low self esteem to be a victim of such miscreants, sometimes being popular and well liked can make one a target of these nuts. Please, for those of us dealing with people who have no conscience or concern for consequences, do you have anything useful to say. Get with reality and try to help.

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  108. Here is a shocker... all who are participating,are feeding the "hungry" or "bored" sociopath(s).

    This(being the site on a whole) is as bad as posting a video on you tube on how to build a bomb. It's even obnoxious to the eye with the bright white on black back ground..

    Thank you for the BIG RED FLAG. :)

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  109. Never fight battles with small minded people.

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  110. Interesting, rivetting...and some of the comments...well...misnformed. (how polite is that!).
    The only way to beat a sociopath (especially one who is dangerous or violent) is to LITERALLY beat them. With the biggest stick you can find.....and then hope youve killed them with that first blow, because if you havent..............run, and dont stop running.
    Apart from the so-called "inner rage"....we dont tend to get that mad, we get EVEN.
    As for anon and their BIG RED FLAG, pay at the door sucker, those flags are NOT free!

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  111. No need to kill or run.
    Aim for knees,elbos,wrists.
    I'd love to see you act out your inner rage or EVEN get p the stairs after my workover...

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  112. First of all, some of us know right off the bat that we are dealing with an idiot..( WRONG..most of us are actually quite high in intelligence) that has no concern for the consequences of their actions (WRONG...we DO have concerns for consequences..just not the same concerns as other people). So we can skip past how to spot one. Number two, some of us want nothing to do with the nut at the outset, and try to avoid the malevolent creature, but to no avail. Number three, the boneheaded cops will arrest those of us who hurt one of these creeps in self defense, we're supposed to roll up in a ball and wait for the cops who will release the creep on bail as soon as money makes its appearance. Keep in mind that the sociopath could care less whether his/her actions will result in his/her own arrest ( WRONG..we DO care if we get arrested and lose our freedom, we DO consider if an action will result in a court appearance...we like to remain anon on the whole..so why would we deliberately unmask ourselves?). That's what makes them tough to deal with, they simply don't care while their victims do. You don't have to be some self loathing loser with low self esteem to be a victim of such miscreants, sometimes being popular and well liked can make one a target of these nuts. Please, for those of us dealing with people who have no conscience or concern for consequences, do you have anything useful to say. Get with reality and try to help.( Instead of trying to demonize us..why dont you actually READ and TAKE IN what we write on the forum...you might actually get some tidbits that will help you effectively avoid us and keep you out of our way. Regurgitating your bitterness and anger towards a sociopath to the point where you generalise and and try and tar us all with the same brush is like your whining..pointless and frutiless. Try ASKING questions to KNOW what and who you are dealing with...you might be surprised.)

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  113. Quote: I have known a few "flagrant-type" sociopaths in my life (as was stated by another post, I think my happy and successful attitude attracts them) and getting their asses beat, arrested, fired from jobs and kick out of people's homes has absolutely no effect on these pitiful people because they have limited ability to learn from their behavior......**What a crock..Im laughing my arse off..because we DO learn..and we get better and better at what we do because we learn from our behaviour on a minute by minute basis. Im rather glad though that people like this carry on distributing this erroneous crap...it makes fooling people so much easier!.**

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  114. Quote This is why there is so little sympathy for sociopaths. There may well be a shining few who try to use their special abilities to help people, but by and large you guys seem intent on exploiting our sympathy for your personal pleasure. The more time I spend here, the less inclined I am to show sympathy to sociopaths. That makes me sad, because I am not neurotypical either and I want to find something redeemable in you guys. I am beginning to think that a healthy society (obviously a hypothetical conceit to begin with) will be forced to ban sociopaths, leaving them to terrorize each other somewhere else......* Everyone is entitled to an opinion...but who died and made you god?......Remember, and remember well.. all you are doing on this site is READING. It doesnt put you in a life situation face to face with one of us to actually experience life through our eyes on a day by day basis. It doesn't show you the vast array of thoughts that each of us experiences..and it doesn't show you any positives (by your standards) that are achieved by sociopaths every day regardless of their intentions.....how in hell can you think that a "healthy" society is one where people judge others as being unsound or unfit to live on the basis of what you read??.......that, to me, seems incredibly pompous and self-serving..which makes you better than us how exactly?.The irony is..unless one of us slips and drops the mask..youd never know what we are.......the bigger irony is that your statements put into "sociopathic context"...could have well been authored by an adept sociopath just to throw people off the scent.. scarey huh??. You want to find a redeeming feature?, then look in different places, talk to different people and LEARN before you cast your aspersions. A lot of us are more than capable of doing "REDEEMABLE" things(by your normal standards) all the time...the thing you are getting bent out over is that we dont do it for the same reasons YOU do , nor for the same resulting emotional feedback, but we DO them never-the-less. Some of us HAVE learned to modify our selfishness...and some of us have positive actions flying out of our arses left right and centre...BUT..the difference will ALWAYS be..WHY we did.. and WHAT we get back from it. Be very careful before you sign yourself up to the "Intention Judges" bandwagon!.

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  115. quote o bring a sociopath to their knees, it only takes a minute. Ask them about an abnormal mole they have on their back, or tell them you (their lover) tested positive for an STD and want them to go get tested, or plant the seed about some disease. Or tell them there is something on their penis that looks like a wart. Watch them turn into mush before your very eyes. I guarantee it. Most are so self centered to the point they are hopeless hypochondriacs. Need to feel a little power and in control? This will do the trick. Then dump the loser for good.....*** FFS!..why do you all seem to think we are of limited intelligence??.
    I know my own body so well and the movements of people Im intimate with so well that apart from the body language and nervousness or other traits that shows when empaths are bullshitting theres no way that I would/could be duped with something like that. The thing is that if someone tried that trick on me...I wouldnt crumble..Id get even..VERY QUICKLY.Yes..we can be incredibly self centred..but it doesnt mean we are STUPID!. Dont be so foolish as to take crap like that statement as gospel and try it on a suspected sociopath...at best it will bring short term amusement until they realise whats going on..at worst, ...well I'll leave that to your fertile imaginations.
    Good grief..so many of you are so dam quick to jump on the " I pulled one over a sociopath" bandwagon and congratulate yourselves. How old are you?... 5?

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  116. If a sociopath worked out you were feeding them false information, they would feel threatened and turn on the person feeding them false information. The sociopath will almost always win in that situation. The advice given here will only work if you are as good a liar and manipulator as the sociopath themselves, in which case you are probably a sociopath yourself.

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  117. How to beat a sociopath? I have one at work - makes her sound like a calculator - which in a way I suppose she is :-)I spent the first 18 months trying to get her to change, a further 2 months being quite angry, and then I had the break through. I've spent the last 3 years laughing at her. Yes, you must cover you back at all times and be aware you are being hunted. The nicer they are to you, the more you have to look over your shoulder but it's OK. Just follow this old adage "Always know what you say, but don't always say what you know." If you don't feed a sociopath with ammunition, they have nothing to fight with. Then sit back and enjoy - it keeps me both mentally alert and mildly amused all day.

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  118. Interesting... Being that I have no intention of signing this, I'll just put it plainly, I am a sociopath.

    Having said that, allow me to share a few details and differences with you.

    I do not feel emotions as you do, they are there, but... muted? Not gone completely, but very subtle, and easy to miss if I'm not looking for them. I've spent my whole life (today included) studying everybody I see, whether I talk to them or not. I mimic most things having anything to do with emotions, because I myself feel none.

    I do not break people. While I don't care for their own well-being, I certainly do care for mine, and my life is far better when the people around me are happy. I am not a 'sponge' as that tends to irritate people, who in turn irritate me. My mother is an empath who 'smells' emotions, and through her, I've learned how to mimic emotions to other empaths. My previous boyfriend and I were together for nearly 4 years before I had to get out. Just as I used him for what I wanted, so did he use me, leading to no gains in the end for either of us.

    The breakup was done quickly, but through him, I got something very valueable, I can not just mimic emotions, but if I so choose, can actually experience them. While most of the time, they're quite a bother (irritation over the weather and other non-controllable things), sometimes they can be useful, such as when dealing with my boss, she's obviously an empath, and was wary about me at first, until I felt her probing at me for emotional responses, and she tripped my one safeguard.

    I was not porn a full-fledged sociopath. I had a few tendencies, but overall, I practiced and learned to shut my emotions off at will, or subconsciously when they became stressed. I most certainly do feel the good emotions, I'm happy most of the time (what's the point in being upset? It helps no-one), excited when acceptable, and I do feel love. Kinda... Love is oddly the only enotion I have difficulty grasping... I've felt it for pets before (in the PG sense, you pervs), but have never loved another person... I've had my fair share of boyfriends, all of whom I broke up with myself, and one girlfriend whom we simply drifted apart, but all said and done, I've never loved any of them.

    >>>

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  119. <<<

    Everybody I know likes me, save the odd few who quite frankly, I don't think they really like anyone... and I have no shortage of people wanting to date me (a lot of them that I find a bit too repulsive to even consider, your mind is the big deal, but my eyes -do- work...) And in the past week or so, I've explained to my boss, the empathic one, that I'm a sociopath, and she doubted me, so I had to show her that all the emotions she'd seen in me were faked, and now that she has seen that I am, in fact, a sociopath, she was afraid at first, until I went back to faking emotions, as I usually do, and she has said that if every sociopath was like me, then they might be more accepted... Until I came here and read all this (yes, I did read almost all of the comments on this page) I thought most sociopaths were like me... but... then I realized, what can't just some of them be like me? I don't want to be cured of this, faking emotions isn't taxing at all, no more than breathing at any rate, and since I've realized that my lying was making my life more difficult than I wanted it to be, I don't even lie any more. Even the little white lies, my own training kicks in, and I apologize and tell the truth moments after I say them.

    For those who are wanting to be vengeful, and beat sociopaths at their own games, the only way to do that is to not play. You might have a few months, or years of research into this, but we have our entire lifetime's hands-on experience at it. Unless you're dealing with an idiot (70% of the population it seems...) you won't win.

    For those wanting to do better, bear in mind, most of us are -not- complete idiots... or at least I would hope not. If they understand that they are sociopaths, you need to at least put all of this in terms of them for the time being, but highlighting to them that if they use people, without giving back, those people won't give anything to the sociopath anymore. That unless they can actually be a damn good liar (which if you caught them, they clearly aren't) they should stop it all-together, as getting caught up in their lives only makes it more stressful, and very problematic when those lies unravel.

    If you truly want to help us, tell the rest of them what they actually need to know, use a gentle voice, but a VERY firm mind. The soft voice will catch out attention, and not letting us mess with your head will allow you to be firm enough to actually teach us to be better. We are still human, believe it or not. We are creatures of habit, help them form better habits, and if you aren't stuck dealing with a particularly stupid sociopath, you can help them to be better people.

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  120. I am in love with the woman that I identified recently as sociopath. I truly care about her and I am obsessed with her sexually and I often think of nothing else but her smell and taste... Yet, I have decided to free my life from her presence. Its so toxic! And its been long time overdue... It fills me with feelings of sorrow and loneliness that I have to leave, but there is no alternative. I am not angry with her. I just feel sad and helpless. I feel like she had died and I'm trying to wake her up from her dead sleep ; ( The havoc and emotional destruction she brought into my life is really great and I feel ashamed of betraying myself for so long. I know that my feelings are distorting reality and the only sober thought in my mind is to run and never look back. I wish things could be deferent. I wish this person who wakes up in a morning with smile of child didn't turn in to the monster closer to the evening... I pity her. I pity myself. I pity us. Yet, I am going to leave ; ((

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  121. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  122. Hahahaha! So, a regular person couldn't beat a sociopath, could she? What a joke! Or should I say self-delusion? Don't you think regular people have brains too? Don't you think they can play foul too? Sociopath take pride in being ahead when it comes to mind games, however you don't need mind games at all to wreck a person's life.

    Yes, yes, sociopaths think they can't be beaten. As a matter of fact, a sense of superiority is among sociopathic symptoms, isn't it?

    However, a regular person shouldn't think even a minute about beating a sociopath: being obsessed about "winning" at mind games means you have been sucked into a sociopathic way of thinking. Get out of there!

    Don't waste your precious time. Be happy and enjoy your life. That will be the best revenge ever.

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  123. Of course I don't have anything but respect for people, sociopath or not, who try to live a decent life.

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  124. I agree that sociopaths should be left alone. I became fast friends with one for about six months. We were so alike, lol or so I thought. Funny how she was at first just like my best friend who introduced us, then she was just like me, then she was like my husband when he was around him. Everyone loves her when they meet her, because she is just like them. Funny how that works. Aside from that, sShe is stunningly beautiful and has an above average IQ. Don't let the blond hair fool you. I feel sorry for anyone who comes into contact with her. If you have something she envy's or wants, you will be targeted. I'm no dummy and a giving person by nature and that's all it took. I know she was stimulated and challenged by me at first. I know when she got bored with me. She started arguing over things or opinions I had. Prior to that she thought I was so smart, funny, and pretty and told me so all the time. In the end she almost wrecked my marriage. We let her move in with us because of some family crisis she was having at home. Very bad idea.
    I got her out of my house and life just in time. As soon as she realized that I was on to her she turned on me. She lied to my husband by telling him I'd had an affair. We are still trying to sort out all the other lies she told.

    I was so mad that I told her I knew what she was and she just laughed. I knew then that she already knew it.

    I know I could give tit for tat and probably throw a few wrenches in the works for her, but it would all be for not. She's probably got so many avenues for opportunites to get money, a place to stay or be taken care of that me messing with a couple wouldn't amount to a hill of beans. I know I wouldn't feel better afterwards either. Infact, I think I'd always be looking over my shoulder wondering if I was going to get paid back double for my efforts.

    This particular sociopath told me at her last place of employment, (which was for MRDD patients)she had impulses to put a pillow over the mouths of several of the residents and put them out of their misery. Now she's working at a nursing home. She carries a shot gun in her trunk. I feel she is dangerous and would kill my dogs, or worse to get even without loosing a nights rest.

    Her last message to me was to leave it alone or she was going to have to hurt me bad.

    I know not all of you sociopaths are bad apples and I did have some fun times, but it came with a cost and a lot of drama.

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  125. I just realized that the father of my children is a sociopath. About two years ago he lost his job due to weed smoking and he blamed me. He was sent to rehab, finished and got caught again, and again my fault. So out of work and a mortage due you would think he would try and find another job. NOOO not him. NOR did he apply for unemployment until 3months later. I ended up paying for everything,but let him tell you "i ain't do nothing".i brought heating oil,food,payed thousands of dollars worth of debt. All that time out of work he never cleaned the house and barely bath the baby. He cheated on me soo many times. Always saying"you nag to much,and they don't" . He had a birthday two weeks ago and had a party and DID NOT invite me. WE LIVE TOGETHER. He said thathe did not invite me because he did not want me there. then last week my friend, my best friend came to visit last weekend and i asked him to watch the kids he reposes "just remember this". Saturday comes and he leaves @7am not to return till 5pm, because his femala friend needs to go buy a car. WTF!!!! THEN texts me for sex on sunday... I have nothing for him anymore. The cops was called on monday,no arrest, but they wanted to take him.He would tell me that it was me the problem. Nobody liked me that's why i don't have any friends. For a short time i really thought that. He told me a few months ago that if i did'nt get help he was leaving me. I am happy to say i found a new apt for sept 1. He told me i deserve what he give me. well iam out and he can have my (BLEEP) to kiss.

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  126. Sociopaths are NOT harmless!!!
    They will DESTROY you and your life. They will SUCK EVERY SCENE OF SELF OUT OF YOU and leave you to dust blowing in the wind while they get another Victim!

    The only way to deal with one is a restraining order and then RUN as fast as you can. You life was nuked the day you met them. Forget the Friends you made. Just Disappear. After a year or two, contact the Friends (slowly) that you believe you can trust. It will take them that long to figure out the SPATH and why you did what you did.

    I know from experience. My elder Brother is a SPATH. I have had to deal with him all my life as his target. I have also had to deal with four of his victims.(They are still my Friends, although he does not know.)
    I have also worked with two Female SPATHs. Once they recognized I had their number, they embarked on a plan to get me fired. One didn't work and they got fired, the other gave me a Layoff and three months later the company called me back and Apologized for the Layoff.

    In both cases I had previously expressed the desire to NOT WORK WITH THEM.

    I do not wish to insult the female population, but I feel a Female SPATH is a BITCH! And a Male SPATH is a BASTARD.

    Cheers,

    BuBu

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  127. I found this topic to be very interesting.
    Yes, most SP's are quite harmless in 'most' situations... and like just about everything there is good and bad in everyone SP's included.

    I find the concept of winning or beating a SP negative, it's often not about beating a SP but more so limiting the damage and havoc they can create. :)

    False signals is not a bad strategy, confuse a SP and the damage they can do is usually limited... but in some cases it can in fact have a reverse effect.
    What folks say here is absolutely true cut your losses and run as most folks do not have the ability to deal or cope with a SP, they're often consumed with changing or helping the SP and this is rarely going to happen.
    Who says a SP needs help, or is a broken individual? Even trying to understand them is usually a mistake. I prefer on working on ways to enjoy, appreciate and accept them.

    I know how to beat most SP's and if you think it is as simple as giving them false signals you are not equipped to deal with a SP.
    But in saying this beating a SP is a small victory, they will usually win the battle if beating them is your agenda.

    SP's in general are NOT bad people and I believe there are many more SP's in society then many realize.
    Most are not cunning villains preying on your emotions full of desire to ruin your life... surely some are. These folks are the ones you can not do anything about and running is the best choice, but mostly the SP is quite normal and reasonably settled and only has troubles in certain situations which are often blown out of proportion and create more trouble.

    Many of my friends are SP's or have traits and I find SP's are often much more interesting then 'normal' people. I have a few traits myself yet also have many characteristics of an empath.

    All to complicated to simplify and I enjoyed everyones opinions.

    Thanks,
    Paul

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  128. My word; this is an interesting read.

    It seems to be true what some sociopaths say - many "empaths" want to be victimized. I'm astonished at how some posters seek others who are bad for them. What is up with that? Drop it and move on. Being wronged is infuriating; but Life is comprised of many experiences. Pick good ones over bad ones.

    Genetic research suggests that sociopaths are born that way. Not an excuse; but worth noting.

    As to condemning sociopaths for their behavior: I detect hypocrisy. Yes, sociopaths could apply strict logic and choose to do right; however, do you do that?

    Let's pick a few examples. How many non-sociopaths commit adultery against their spouses (or with married people)? How many work jobs knowingly harming innocents-costing people their homes, denying them life-saving medical insurance coverage they are entitled to, or developing drugs that kill patients? We could go on at length with such examples. When you, as a non-sociopath, do such things, is it "right"? Do you rationalize it? Do you say it's okay because you feel bad-but then go out the next day and spew venom from your lips, using negative speech to hurt and control others? If so, then how are you different from a sociopath?

    The last thing I want to do is support the practices of sociopathy as we recognize them. But I likewise don't want to excuse those behaviors in myself, or anyone else. We are all flawed.

    You know that you have harmed innocent people, yet you don't care, because you want what you want, and screw others. Or maybe you just got a rush off the power of doing it. Isn't that a definition of sociopathy? Maybe the general population isn't as separated from sociopaths as they like to imagine.

    Hopefully (and probably) in the not distant future we'll have means to prevent these types of conditions genetically. Then we can get down to the business of trying to actually be decent and considerate for agape reasons.

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  129. I guess the question of "beating" a socio is a question of goals. This post is hilariously misleading, don't try to do what he says: It won't work.

    I "beat" a sociopath before, but I never would have had to if he hadn't become my friend in the first place. I've noticed a lot of things about the relationship between empaths and socios during this time. I also didn't "beat" him by playing his game. I "beat" him by severing my ties with him and taking our mutual friends with me (taking his toys, so to speak). He'll find others (in fact, I hear he already has), but that's the point, socios are ruthless at their game. You need to take the game in a different direction.

    The key is truth. Empaths are not as honest as they like to think they are, by and large. Socios work by dividing and conquering, but they are not good at dealing with the Voltaires of the world. When you're honest to the point of fault with your friends the asymmetrical versions of the stories the socio has told you will become apparent. When all of you are aware enough to realize what's going on, you just leave. Game over. Socios count on YOUR inability to live up to be the person you claim you want to be.

    If you look inward for a solution first, the only way the socio can beat you is through violence. Which, it should be noticed, SOME socios are perfectly happy to dish out....so watch out for that and learn some self defense.

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  130. @Anonymous

    What do you mean by "Voltaires" of the world?

    And could you please further explain these words of yours: "When you're honest to the point of fault with your friends the asymmetrical versions of the stories the socio has told you will become apparent. When all of you are aware enough to realize what's going on, you just leave. Game over. Socios count on YOUR inability to live up to be the person you claim you want to be."

    Thanks.

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  131. I think it's not necessary to "win" anything... Don't play with them and just be indifferent to their charms, you just fall for them because they sense your weakness and give you the impression of the person you like. You're weakness is probably something you try hard to hide away, your source of insecurity you build your identity around. In some severe cases, it's difficult for the person to admit that, but remember it's just your vanity that is hurting, in fact you have the chance to become somebody more adapted to this world which is a cycle of construction/destruction.

    First you should work out what your weaknesses are and work on them, try to improve yourself instead of getting revenge or proving to yourself or anyone that you're the winner, you will remain pathetic in the eyes of a socio because he will remain the centre of his universe and just move on.. If you're an empath, it's hard for you to understand his worldview in which others are viewn as objects, whereas you see others as more or less equal to you, don't expect reciprocity from socios and don't try to prove you're superior or reassure yourself you are, because then you just continue your state of victimization. In this specific context, you've already lost (if you're a victim of a socio), accept that, there is no universal rule how to deal with others, so you should be prepared to the fact there are people out there who will harm you. If you've chosen not to, look out for individuals with a similar mindset who will answer your expectations.

    Learn from your experience and just move on, life your life and benefit from your experience, don't trust people too easily and try to figure them out first. A socio won't change and doesn't have to.

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  132. Empaths are over- emotive, energy sucking wet blankets full of negatrons.....No wonder sociopaths subconsciously close themselves off from these people. They're sickening to me, drowning in their emotions and trying to pull you under.

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  133. Wow, for a moment I thought I clicked my way into a bizzare episode of criminal minds or something. Try reading Erich Fromm, he's not as biased as some of the other psychs.

    Interesting web site.

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  134. In order to defeat anyone, you must
    think as they think.

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  135. All one has to is remove their 'objects' human or otherwise. Block their ability to stimulate themselves, and/or don't play the game - can't catch or tag someone if they are not running. They need others to feed off, remove their food source.

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  136. Anonymous's idea about honesty is the closest thing I've seen to a weapon against them. They survive because 99% of "empaths" cannot accept what they are. This is, if you think about it, the only reason they get away with it. They pride themselves on their ability to read and manipulate people but I don't think they are sensitive or nuanced in any way. They believe they are but it's really a heartless way of thinking. They are quite gullible - so if you told one you are non-violent you can throw it by punching it repeatedly in the face. Otherwise tell it (in a confiding and guilt-tormented way) how you beat someone nearly to death because they lied to you/betrayed you. You didn't say before because you didn't know them well enough to trust them. If you pile on the emotion they will likely believe you. Find their weak spots. They will probably be homosexual and even if not will fear the innuendo. Put the frighteners on them before they start mischief against you. They don't understand "implied" trust and wouldn't observe it anyway. When you decide to fight one, you must take it to the end with no mercy. If you have have qualms about destroying it and its livelihood walk away. But fight it and be vocal about what it is. Shout it from the rooftops because however gullible people are this will always strike a chord. Deep down inside we know so-and-so has a heart but certain people, when we really think about it...

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  137. This article makes me laugh. You can't beat a (high functioning) sociopath at his own game! Our game playing has been well refined and every time we fail, we get a little better. Practice makes perfect, that's true with anything. Think about that, now think about how little practice you empaths have in being totally ruthless and remorseless. You really think you can beat them by giving them home field advantage? Not happening.

    I really hate to say this, as I am pretty well signing my own death certificate here, but the ONLY, let me re-state ONLY! way to beat a sociopath is to kill him/her in his/her sleep. Good luck doing that with your fragile grasp of reality that leaves you incapable of fulfilling even the most simplistic survival tactics. (Like efficiently lying your way out of trouble, or DOMINATING idiots that decide they want to see if they can test you and win.)

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  138. Problem is that most people are completely unaware they have entered in to a relationship or friendship with a sociopath.
    We most likely assume they are simply a person with "issues".


    In school we don't learn about them.(not in Australia anyway).
    We just assume that sociopaths/psychopaths are serial killers or mass murderers.

    No one receives a flyer with a list of traits that says;
    "Hi everybody, watch out for these traits.
    These people are sociopaths. Sociopaths make up 4% of the population. That means and 1 in 25 people you come across could be a sociopath!

    Your mother could be one, your boss,perhaps your babysitter or even your best friend!

    They are just like you and I except they do not have a conscience to speak of - no biggie, just means that if one gets it's hooks into you, at the very least you will be brain raped. Have a nice day :) "

    That would be enough to put anyone on high alert!

    Seriously now ;)

    knowledge is power


    The best and smartest way to beat a sociopath is leave.

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  139. What about the long distance four year relationship I've been in with? She promised to move 1000 miles to be here with me. Came to visit every few months for 2 weeks at a time and moved to various states behind my back with her "ex" girlfriend. When I discovered her secrets she turned it around on me and played the victim and tried to make me look like I tried to make me look like I was incensitive for even being hurt over the discovery. She HAD to move because she had no choice and was protecting my feelings...of course she was. She moved twice. Her stories would change all the time. She was afraid of MY anger. I was angry because of her putting me off all the time. I found receipts and she would look at me in the eyes and tell me what I was looking at wasnt there. I believe she had something all while she was telling me I was crazy. I had to break it off with her. It was going on for far to long. Now that I started seeing someone else who seems healthy and not so needy as she was in the begining of our relashionship, she's going NUTS. She's threatening to destroy my new relationship and suicide etc. I dont know what to do. I've tried calling her therapist but they cant help because of the laws.

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  140. YOU ARE A UGLY DUMB BITCH

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  141. most of this forum apears to be sociopaths with no regaurd to the harm they do. even going so far as to offer advice to other manipulative and feelingless people on the best way to manipulate and abuse another person. some of the personal stories i could relate with. many of these posts (especialy the advice) seems to imply that you belive you are the only one with feelings and any one who hurts you has some kind of disorder. in most cases there is no point in beating a sociopath. only in recognising them and avoiding contact or keeping contact to a minimum. even in this case my posting at all is probably doing more harm than good.

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  142. To Anonymous on Dec 14, 2011
    You are not doing more harm then good, you are right, I know first hand to the point that I got my name changed and still they will destroy your life, and when one says that a sosiopath probably wont kill, yes they will, they will make you end up doing yourself in, or make it look like an accident, if they dont want you around or fear you are a therat they could take you out for a boat ride in the middle of the lake and once you are in the water they will not let you get back into the boat and they will watch you beg and suffer until you cant swim anymore and watch you drown, and they will tell who ever that this person just went under water and that was it, everyone will believe this person because she is a nurse practitioner well respected in the community, but has manipulated and lied to everyone, I fear for my children's life everyday, she said to me to never fuck with her and to do as she says, I said or else what your going to hurt me or the children she said accidents happen, she has gotten away with so much even provoked someone take their own life the sad thing is it worked, she said to me face it people listen to me and everyone does exactly what i tell them to just ask the person that took their life, and then she smiled

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  143. From the same person that left the last comment, I just had a nightmare one night about her taking my kids out in a boat in the middle of the lake, when you know what someone is like you are always in fear, as for the person that took their life, that was the saddest day of my life, I am afraid to speak to anyone, cause i know what she will do..my family thnks shes so great and and they love her power, and when i told them what she was doing to me and what she has done, they said....well its not like she did anythng to us.."they are the same".
    my kids want nothing to do with me, she could have anyone eating out of her hand in a sec, shes that good..I dont know what to do, i have lost everything and now living on the streets, from having a company for more then 20 years with a $10,000 a month income and within only knowing her for 4 years she has fucked me bad, i would have never thought i would be living on the streets what a fucken mess.......

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  144. Confuse them all right, I had a sociopath trying to slander me like crazy on message boards. She was telling the most outrageous stories and being a total attention whore. My mates who never liked her, went and gave her what for; and her being as stupid as she was thought it was me, was she ever wrong! She ended up making a huge fool of herself and got tangled up in her own lies and therefore tried to build more lies to get herself out of her mess, so in the end all her attention whoring ended up destroying herself. These sociopaths are toxic to themselves.

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  145. I knew a socio, he filled me full of shit about myself and about life in general...he was much older than me and i ended up telling him one day when we were chilling out that i thought he was my dad at one point, and that is why i was hanging out with him. Freaked the fool out(as he even abandoned his own kids). I dont see him much anymore. The end.

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  146. You all sound like a bunch of whiny babies who can't take care of themselves and expect sociopaths to have a 'change of heart' or feel 'guilty' about what we've done.
    I find it quite numerous.
    Quit your whining. It just makes me realize how weak you are.

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  147. Mimicking a sociopath is not the answer, take it from some one who has suffered for 28 years because I fell in love with one. Get away, what ever it takes leave them, forget them, they will do you no good. You might end up like them!

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  148. Sociopaths are a bunch of evil pukes. They don't win. Statistics show that most self destruct or take their own lives. They usually die a lonely death. I was married to one, and I played him for the past month after I found out what he is lol Got him to buy me all sorts of stuff, and got him to spend loads of money on me because he thought he would get something in return lol I watched him squirm lmao..the whole time I was planning my get away. He lost lmao

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  149. You CAN beat these pukes..but since each one is after something different (money, sex, etc.) how to beat them depends on what they're after. Is it worth it? No. They hate alienation...that's the best revenge :)

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  150. It's all the same. NPD, BPD, Antisocial, Skitzoid, Sociopath..whatever. There all the same just a few variants. There's nothing special about these people. Theyre as COMMON as DIRT! Those that want to beat a sociopath WIN are playing the same game, their just pissed they can't lower themselves or are too scared to go there to beat the socio at their own game. Everyone of these disturbed repulsive demented idiots thinks their something special. It's easy to lie, betray, play games, bully..these poor escuses for humanity are pathetic. If they were so good at being intelligent they'd cut the crap. If they were really so strong and better than others, they wouldn't need to cheat or have any compulsion to do so. They'd hold themselves to a higher standard. Theyre infantile losers. The reason every horror or bad thing happens in society because of these demented f*wits. This bullshit's been going on ever since man turned up to be a plight on the universe. It is previlent in all forms of society, and yes the arab nations terrorist style are chock full of it. So what to do with these infectious disease ridden repulsive excuses for humans and all their terrorist behaviour? .. Well the answer sure isn't to become one of them! Where the ends justifies the means. That's the problem..to beat them we have to become them? That's not logical. Nothing in history ever went any different way. Yet we have become more civilized over the centuries..so how did we achieve this with all these demented snakes about corrupting the better ranks of society?.. We refused to PLAY. We expelled them from power. We will never get rid of this human disease, it's a part of all of us. They're nothing special, you could become just like them if you played the game long enough. All you need is an excuse to justify your unnexceptable behaviour. We know their way doesn't work, it destroys entire populations and civilizations and stops us from achieving and concentrating on studies and practices would make the world and humanity something better. You beat them by repelling their behaviour, by standing against it, by enforcing morality and conducting yourself correctly. Yes you must defend yourself, but that's why we have nominated the police and other institutions to enforce law. We change society by changing law, by upholding it and demanding others do too. If you go around slashing sociopaths tyres..are you dementedly in denial that you can't see that you are one? We must fight fair. A sociopath, NPD, Antisocial whatever is the most COMMON LOWEST unintellegent and WEAKEST form of what it is to be human. I was ONE! Bullshit you can't be cured. You have to CHEAT at everything you do, just to get what you want. How truelly pathetic is that? Warped beyond comprehension that anyone could think logically they are superior while they cheat to achieve. Lying, betraying, everything in your lives is bullshit including your fake ass opinion of yourselves and others. Morally corrupt and in need of a giant BITCH SLAP! Humans will war against each other till we cease to exist. Refuse to Play. Toss their pathetic asses out. Divorce them, fire them, toss them out of friendship, jail them, report them, call them out and don't play their games! The stronger morality in society the less play these idiots get. If someone lies to you repeatedly NEVER trust them again and EXPEL them. They'll all end up together on their little island of insanity , playing their demented destructive games until the last ones left to start gnawing his/her own arm off. So irrevelant if their lying, stealing, cheating, sleeping around, bullying, connivingly playing games..their common denomator is DECEIT and the inability to achieve by playing fair. You win everytime you hold them accountable, expell them from your life and refuse to behave like them.

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    1. hippy trying to convince yuppies that all you need is love. in this reply you are trying to emotionally blackmail people who don't respond to emotion. These sociapaths play games, its cute for a while, you think it's the PLAY that is the most important part and get sucked in. then you realize you are fucked, its a crap world for us empaths, but diversity is the spice of life as "they" say. I can have emotion and be rational, maybe not completley but hey i can be more rational than sociapaths can be emotional, so i'm in a better position morally and existentially.

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  151. hello every one i have just met with this priest of the reunitingexspell@gmail.com and i finally find out that he is really a truthful spell caster and so powerful and he is the most powerful spell caster that i have ever met. i wish i have met him before. and my husband have just come back to me and every thing happened just the way he had said it i am so happy that i have met with him and now i have my husband back to my self. if you all that are here have not tried him you just have to do so and get your heart desires fulfilled. stop been doubting i have tested him and i am now a fulfilled woman. REUNITING EX SPELL TEMPLE IS GREAT.THANK YOU FOR THE HAPPINESS YOU BROUGHT ON ME. you can reach him if need be at reunitingexspell@gmail.com

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  152. This is all very silly and sounds like a fanbase of sociopaths or sociopathy. I have learned something: I can pay attention to what other people think and believe, put myself into their shoes, or I can recognize that I am the only perspective I will ever truly know without speculation, and shut out all other perspectives, call them false or trivial, and allow them to drip into nothingness. When I decide to do something and tell myself that nothing will stop me, no words, no thoughts, nothing, I do it. This includes good acts, this includes harmful (bad) ones. The only thing which prevents me from punishing those who would harm me is consequence. Some of these consequences are social isolation. What good would it be to harm someone so badly that I couldn't receive anything from them? I get the most reward from not harming them at all!

    Sociopaths have as much power as you give them. Most of them want friends, as do all people, albeit for different reasons than most people want friends. Want to defeat a sociopath? Remove yourself from their lives completely once you get close to them! Find whatever you can to hurt them and use it, which is generally doing the opposite of what they like or taking the things they like away from them. It's absolutely beautiful to watch someone who has hurt you for a given length of time fall to their knees in emotional agony when you completely surprise them with your own viciousness because, through watching the sociopath, you have learned what makes THEM happy, and you take all of it away in a split second. A punishment for attempting to harm you. If you are the toy and they the toddler, go play with another child and make sure they are watching.

    I don't believe I am a sociopath. I believe I have encountered many, and I have learned that sometimes I have to be a bit more cruel then them, I have to cut my emotions off completely and pull everything I possibly can out to harm them: defiling memories of dead loved ones, childhood and adult traumas, everything. Because the only way they learn is through pain. Much like a deaf person learns to play an instrument through FEELING the music, a sociopath learns to behave differently not through empathy as they cannot experience it, but through some other avenue directly related to their own behaviors, such as hurting them whenever they do something to hurt you. Conditioning. Easy as pie... good luck. Hurt 'em good and tell 'em it's for the best.

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  153. I know one sociopath very well , he is my husband, we are going through a divorce. He was my project, I helped him get away from drugs, alcohol, prison life and while he was out on parole I married him to set him right. What a fool I was. No matter how much he loved me he felt it was okay not to keep his word/prenups/away from chasing online children in the game rooms...once I found out he had not changed his ways, I am filing for divorce and he has set out for my ruination with all his might..... this is a tough battle for us both and YES he has feelings of anguish and he knows what he has done caused our ruination but he does not know how to feel guilt, instead he twists logic within his mind and blames me for being being "crazy"..... it is true, I must have been crazy in love cause I had not clue he was so cruel.....any way, that is water over the bridge and I wish him well and I wish me freedom ...... He does feel remorse .... we miss each other.... only in the next life time shall we try again, maybe :)

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    1. ...Water over the bridge huh

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  154. I'm a sociopath that dislikes other sociopaths. I just wanted that out there.

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    1. Hmm, and what is it you dislike about your own kind?

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  155. My ex-husband is a sociopath. I have dealt with him for the past 22 years. I have over time, learnt to speak to and treat him how he speaks and treats me. It works, he preys on being able to premeditate what I will do. Which now i understand that he has no conscience and its all just games to him, i can now predict what he will do. we have 2 children together, 1 of my children understands what he is dealing with. Because i can enrage my ex-husband now and play his game personally with him, he's not interested. Im not sure what is meant by beating one, but I do know how to contend with one. Act as they act back at them, inform your close friends and family, dont associate with those they have befriended. It is hard for people with a conscience to understand someone who doesnt have the ability. It takes practice ALOT, but after a while you can learn to mimic there ways, and block out emotions when dealing with them.

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    1. You can learn, but the better thing would be to get the h### away from him. You've lost the essence of life. I've been in that boat before; too many times. I never could grasp that it really is a choice. It really is. No contact is best. I'm practicing no contact, which is hard to do, but the alternative is worse, much, much worse. They are simply creatures that didn't evolve.

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  156. I know exactly what you mean. Totally agree!
    But when you have children with these people, its a big process you have to help them go through!
    When they cant play there pathetic games with you, if you have children, they try to play those same games with them..
    I still dont speak to him, but I do have to help my children understand what there dealing with.
    personally my life is going ok. Its my kids that I have to educate.
    Sociopaths are good at playing with your emotions. I have brought my kids up to care about people, but with their so called father its a whole different set of rules.

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  157. Sociopathy does not confer intelligence. Just because you are a sociopath doesn't mean you can manipulate.

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  158. it is wrong that you exist

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  159. Sociopath, nature or nurture? Is it their fault that they are sociopath? Can it be cured?
    Sociopath lacks empathy towards other...right?
    A normal person lack empathy towards sociopath or anyone that will not benefit and harm them...right?

    PS: Do sociopath lack empathy towards animal (other than human) as well?

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  160. To be honest if youve actually study sociopaths you would know some are born like it. The term 'screw loose' yep thats them, a part of the brain that controls emotions was never connected. There is no treatment nor cure. They lack empathy full stop. Anywhere they do appear empathetic is just past of their master plan of manipulation. There are also different forms of sociopaths, those who are violent, those who are money hungry, those who about sexual desires, plus many more. There are sociopaths that are intellegent and those that are not. basically their like a 2 year old and really have a desire for attention.
    Once you really understand their ways - theyre pretty predictable.

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