Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Blood lust 2

An update from the same reader as this previous post on blood lust:
Thought I'd give you a small update on myself.

I was at a party, a thing I do every month so people don't think I'm a complete shut-in. During this party I commented on a guys shirt, he had a tag hanging out, so I tried a joke and asked if he put his shirt backside-out.
Apparently this was how the shirt was supposed to look. So, a couple of minutes later, this girl walks up to me. She's pissed cause she thought I was making fun of the guy, apparently she was his ex-girlfriend and still had feelings for him, and she was drunk, so she was angry at me.
I tried explaining to her that I wasn't making fun of her. And out of nowhere, she punches me in the cheek. The second I got my eyes on her I, kinda snapped. My arm just kinda wrapped around her throat without my brain telling it to do it. And me and her, and a bystander kinda froze for some seconds. My brain was saying "this is a bad idea. A lot of crap is gonna happen if you dont let go". But I did not let go. I felt my insides going into some kond of euphoria. I wanted to choke her.

But, I let go. Of course the other people on the party found out about this and I was asked to leave.

Two days later I thought about this. This was the closest to happiness(I guess?) that I've been.
Never have I felt my heart beat like that.

So, I went to Oslo (the capital of Norway). Went to some bars, looking for some drunk people.
I found one guy. This obnoxious lowlife. And I picked a fight. Wasn't hard to do.

We were standing in an alley, fighting, I had been drinking so it was a fair fight. In the end, I lost the fight. But, during the fight. I felt somewhat more alive than ever. I wanted to make him bleed, I wanted TO bleed. Every punch I gave and took, I got more and more sober. My mind was buzzing, my body was getting feeling more and more like they were a single person. I felt good, for the first time in a long time, I felt home.

No loneliness, no pit, no more was I an outsider. I felt good.
This was my first real fight. I doubt it will be the last.

The days after that, I've felt good. My spirit is lifted, it seems my burden is less to bear.
Maybe I'm the only one that will feel like that after a fight. (People get the wrong idea from watch the TV-show Dexter ..)

Now, what I'm trying to say is. I have bloodlust. I know there are alot of sociopaths out there, but not many of us have bloodlust.
But, if you have it. Don't let it go out on the wrong people. I'm going to do my best and take it out on the ones that deserve it.
This idea of there being a "wrong person" to take your blood lust out on is interesting to me. I presume the main drive of blood lust is only physical violence towards another human being, i.e. inflicting some sort of physical harm. The fact that it might "hurt" the other human being, either psychically, financially, or emotionally, is merely an unintentional, and perhaps even an unfortunate consequence of acting upon the blood lust -- it's not necessarily the primary aim. Does this seem right, blood lusters?


  1. #1 - The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.

    #2 - The second rule of Fight Club is, you DO NOT talk about Fight Club.

    #3 - If someone says stop, goes limp, taps out, the fight is over.

    #4 - Two guys to a fight.

    #5 - One fight at a time.

    #6 - No shirts, no shoes.

    #7 - Fights will go on as long as they have to.

    #8 - If this is your first night at Fight Club, you have to fight.

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  4. As for the idea of there being a "wrong person" to take your blood lust out on, well the definition of blood lust is the desire for blood shed, I'm not sure it would have any directional qualities at all.
    From my understanding (garnished from comics) bloodshed is something that takes over your conscious ability to reason, with that in mind it seems blood lust is a high level form of aggression (knowledge bomb) aggression is typically brought on by a number of factors IE punched in the face, some gross underestimation of a situation or heat (best for last).
    Following that line of reasoning, blood lust would be something that came over you because of a situation the fact this person sought out some form of violence in a bar would signal to me that its not so much blood lust but some need for power, the power over someone else, the power to hold their life or their well being their hands with out any wanton regard.

    From what I have seen power can be a force to be reckoned with. (PUN INTENDED) it can corrupt like so many politicians would agree, it can also be the driving force behind someones actions regardless of their validity on a personal or even social level.

  5. When I was younger, violence was purely a means to an end. As I've reached (mostly) maturity, though, I've had more of a desire for pointless, dispassionate violence. I've had a few moments where I let myself go a little too much, and my lovely logic went right out the window. It's a sort of power beyond compare. When it was just a goal-oriented thing, it never registered. But when I realized that I could hold a person's life literally in my hands and just crush it out of them... it was the biggest high I'd ever felt.

    To answer the question: Personally, yes, it's about the physical act itself. The less tangible damage is an afterthought, if that. I've been experimenting a bit over the last year or so, trying to find the ideal high. Mostly one night stands with freaky girls with daddy issues. Knifeplay, garroting, the usual.

    I made a garrote for that purpose, and I think that's my favorite. There's this unpretentious beauty that consumes someone's face when they realize they can't breathe and you're ignoring the safeword. I didn't kill any of them, for obvious reasons, but my less than humane methods are probably why they were one night stands.

    To clarify, and answer the inevitable questions about that description: My thoughts on sex have been made clear in recent comment threads, so it should be equally clear that there are no sexual underpinnings to these acts on my part.

    If it is not, I will reiterate: It's all a power trip, not a way to get my rocks off.

    1. See, I can't get on board with this idea.

      My bloodlust mainly comes in the form of rage. However I could never go for those who cannot defend themselves (or even have a hope of succeeding, like these one night stands).

      In my own personal opinion, this behaviour is beneath me. However I understand your need, but don't approve (I'd lie and say I don't look down on your for it, but in all honesty you can probably take these comments from a stranger on the internet)

      Just, try not to kill any of these girls. It's not exactly like you'd give them the chance to stop you.

  6. I think it's about the need to stand up for yourself, and release inner rage, you want to be able to feel good about yourself.
    The only problem is you don't see who deserves it, only who you think deserves it.

  7. I have a similar feeling but with pain more than blood. causing someone emotional pain is something that is near euphoria if done properly. I find myself purposely befriending people so that further down the line I can emotionally devastate them.

    emotional devastation can obviously come from physical means but mainly I gain my pain fueled moment from mental or non-physical means.

  8. Word verification: "plath"

    I used to think I enjoyed someone having power over me, but it's really just that I like to see someone having power over someone else. I am rarely involved in my own fantasies. If I am, it's usually in 3rd person.

    I see sex from a typical male's point of view, always have, which can be a little bit biologically frustrating and at odds with reality.

    [cue to Freud]

  9. I would of enjoyed watching my father electrocute himself, unfortunatly it was just an act to try and stop his family from leaving him.
    The thought of killing him crossed my mind, but even at 10 years of age you know there will be consaquences.
    Damn those laws that protect people who deserve to die.

    1. Sometimes, it would be nice if there was a "Vigilante" clause in the legal system.

      But this could be took advantage of in so many ways I understand why there isn't

  10. For the most part, yes.

    The aim, for me, is domination or control. It is a power trip. When I experience any form of "bloodlust", my only purpose is to get a high in living, and to feel for the moment, connect, which I receive from dominating another, or humiliating them and hurting them. I generally use sex to execute my bloodlust. I go in knowing I want to control and humiliate someone, and what happens for the rest of the night is usually always impulse. When blood is shed I am reminded that the person I am with does exist, and obsession takes over with the need to control this person's living. I feel like an Angel of Death that has purposely suffocated a patient, then revived them back to life. I'd have that control over their being, and that gives me feeling, a high of sorts.
    Whether I permanently damaged the victim, or not, would only come as an afterthought if I was caught and persecuted, but I believe that is the case with most. No one usually cares until they get caught for it.

    I can completely relate to the biologically wrong feeling Medusa. I relate more to men in almost every aspect, even sex (based soley on what I was told, and learned, obviously I'll never know, not a male). There are more than a few occasions where I would love to be a male sociopath, but this is only to gain a different type of control during sex. Most of my fantasies are still, unfortunately, fantasies. If I were to act them out, I would either die, or be in prison. The logistics of my fantasies aren't properly thought out yet, need more time and life experience ;)

  11. I hate to ask this question, as I know it can be a very touchy subject, But, where any of you who enjoy sexual power games sexually abused as children?

  12. I love to hit another person and feel that part of their body damage and pull away. I love to kick and to see the surprise on their face at my power. I love to catch their body and throw it through the ground, and the rush that I get at the fear and panic in their eyes while in the air and the pain when they crash down makes my fingers tingle and tastes like nothing else. I love to sit on them, then, and choke them with my arms as their extremities wiggle and try futilely to work their bodies free. I like to let them think they are defending my choke, just to rotate ninety degrees and pull their arm against its elbow. I love to make blood flow down a face- an arm- a leg. I like the wince from what I've done the the flinch as I move in again. I love their desperation and their defeat. I love my physiology's response.

    Buuuut.... I have little desire to be sent to jail and I enjoy many benefits from fitting my pretend self nicely into middle-class society, so I do martial arts. :) As long as I can manage to tantra my way through and not go too far, I get my little fixes regularly.

  13. I am an empath or "normal" and I absolutely LOVE the feeling of kicking someone's ass. However, this is only when they have pushed me to the point of rage; which for me takes a long time.
    Unfortunately, going to jail doesn't appeal to me and when I was much younger and pushed to that point, I did get arrested and had to hire an attorney.
    My point is everyone has a bloodlust. The major difference is the level in which it takes to provoke someone to violence.
    There are plenty of people I'd love to beat the shit out of but the consequences curbs that desire.
    It really is too bad we don't have more Fight Clubs around to get out the pent up rage.
    Instead, people like me have to exert ourselves in other physical ways.

  14. Ammy,

    Yes, it seems that the difference between my perspective and yours is that I enjoy what I'm doing to the person, independent of who they are or what they've done and you enjoy doing it to someone who has made you mad. In my case the motivating factor is the desire for a pleasurable experience where yours seems to stem from a reaction to a negative one. Does this seem right?

  15. @Pythias, yes absolutely!
    I wouldn't enjoy shedding just anyone's blood. However, I do understand the rush and thrill of it. I used to hunt when I was a kid and I have to say it was so much fun!!! I never had remorse or guilt. We never tortured anything but we did shot a lot of wild rabbits and rats.
    I don't get to release that energy anymore.
    I think violence is a need as much as sex is.
    There are so many healthy and legal ways to curb one's sexual appetite, but not one's violent appetite. Too bad.

  16. An adrenalin junkie is not the same as a blood luster. An adrenaline junkie associates adrenaline with happiness.

  17. Post modern if its only about the physical act why don't you become a professional fighter? You can make plenty of money beating the crap out of people for sport.

  18. I've considered it, Savagelight. I just don't get the same high. Beating someone up is just an adrenaline dump; sure, it feels good but it's not the same. As I said, goal-oriented violence just doesn't register. It is the transactional sort of violence, where garroting is the one-sided, transcendent sort. No wonder doctors like to play god.

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  22. I'd say so, Aerianne. It's the most likely explanation, anyway. Although, it's not as much the intellectual sort of control that I tend to work towards. It's more primal, just the sort of raw power over life that a carnivorous predator has.

    I think the problem I have with the "bloodluster" from the OP is this: "Don't let it go out on the wrong people. I'm going to do my best and take it out on the ones that deserve it."

    It just sounds like he's casting himself in the next Batman movie. Just a touch dramatic for my tastes.

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  24. To me it sounds like the OP feels remorse if he hurts those who didn't "rightfully" deserve it. To lessen his personal guilt he justifies it by looking for "those" type of people.

    As far as being abused, I don't think that really matters. The abusee doesn't necessarily become an abuser and vice-versa.

  25. I don't come across as a particularly violent person, However when I'm feeling terrible inside I enjoy nothing more than kicking the shit out of a completely random bystander. I love to walk casualy down the street and then, when I'm right up close to them just punch them square in the face. I immensely enjoy the completetly bewildered look in their eyes and the feeling that i've made them feel about 1000 times worse than i do inside and out. I love the surge of power and dominence which pulsates around my body and fills me with euphoria. I also enjoy a good fight but I only ever engage in them when im certain that I will emerge victorious as defeats of any sort practically leave me feeling suicidal.

    1. You to me are the perfect example of "bad people" and who i end up cutting in my quest to satisfy my "blood lust".

    2. Then I'd like you to do this to the wrong sort of person.

      You deserve to get the shit beaten out of you, this is not sport, rage or revenge.

      It's being a fucking arse-hole.

  26. @Member of Society: Where the fuck do you live, rural Vietnam? I don't know anywhere on the planet where "kicking the shit out of" so-called "random bystanders" is anything other than a ticket to the clink.

    I'm sorry, your whole comment smacks of teenage revenge fantasy, not any kind of reality I've ever experienced. Also, turning into a suicidal pussy over losing is pathetic from any perspective.

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  28. Well, it seems to be a topic that which some chaos can be caused. So the general consensus is blood lust isn't something to be directed per say but more so used as a form of control to get that power kick ? that being said I have never really gotten that kick from physical violence, I am by no means a physically unfit person I can fight and I have strength, but I so do enjoy the control via manipulation more then the physical control, does that make me a pussy I wonder ?

  29. I wouldn't say so, SOM. I prefer more subtle displays of power, myself; but if I am possessed of an urge to do violence, and my position is not measurably damaged by performing same, I will do it with gusto. It sounds like you don't get any particular joy from violence, so why bother doing it?

  30. No. Just a different kind of control. Physical control can get tiring.

    There are so many methods to control it's almost irrelevant. In the end it's about power over someone, or something, that gives a pleasant feeling :)

    PMS, you are my soulless soul mate.

    I agree with your comment on M.O.S. I doubt they were serious though. If they were I don't think they'll last another year with that kind of self esteem.

  31. @PMS I don't like it, I don't hate it, I'm neutral. I know if I kick the crap out of a random walking down the street there is a good chance I'm headed away but when faced with the situation of violence for me it is I don't want to fight but if you touch me or my wife then well its time.

    In any fight I have ever been in induced by myself or others I have no feeling for it, its like I was jogging, I am just currently involved with some sort of exercise, lets face it sometimes I just don't wanna go to the gym.

    The euphoria I get from controlling someone and having them think they are in control pleases me to the point where I sprout a semi.

    Its like I feel more powerful making someone want to do something they normally wouldn't do, where in if I physically force them I get no reaction within myself.

  32. @Justice: "PMS, you are my soulless soul mate." D'aww. I'm sure we'd have a good time. We could go out hunting together. lol

    @SOMe: Right, that's what I was saying. You don't get any particular joy out of it. And I think I need to make clear that I my violent urges have nothing to do with forcing people to do anything. It's really just the rush.

    "The euphoria I get from controlling someone and having them think they are in control pleases me to the point where I sprout a semi."

    I lol'd.

  33. "The euphoria I get from controlling someone and having them think they are in control pleases me to the point where I sprout a semi."

    That's awesome! I'm not a sociopath but even I understand that!
    Power is sexy.

  34. Ha! To be honest Post modern(and the rest) I was half taking the piss. Its just that after Pythias's post I wanted to see just how much I could get away with. Ther has only been one occasion where I've done that sort of thing and unfortunately for me it was was a ticket to the clink(actualy reformatory school as this incident did indeed occur during my teens). I've found myself in a number of fights(also mostly during my teens) but have never dwelled on my defeats. I'm actually a reasonably happy person and have never felt suicidal, that would be truly pathetic.

  35. Today, I would very much like to punch out my bass player.

  36. Your in a band?

  37. @Medusa, so what's stopping you? :)

  38. He's a good friend of mine and has given me lots of things.

    But also flaky as hell and likes happy music far too much.

    It would be like punching out a mouse. Not a fair fight.

  39. Two weeks ago at practice, my drummer went up to him and was all, "I'd really like to strangle the happy out of you."

    My drummer is definitely an aspie, so this comment was pretty priceless.

  40. Completely understand but it would be so nice if we could just go out side once in awhile and settle our differences or release some stress with some lovely ass kicking.

  41. I feel the exact same way. But I control it. I train in martial arts, and when the incident does arise where someone is in my face, I don't care if I win or lose the fight, I just want to fight! this goes against everything my teachers say, "avoid violence if possible" fuck that shit. So long as it's an unarmed, 1 on 1 fight,I'll give it my all! This way, it's not like I'm taking my shit out on an innocent. But again, it's not like I go out of my way to look for a fight... that doesn't make me a sociopath, does it?

  42. I don't see fist-fighting, especially one-on-one fair fights, as anything approaching bloodlust. That's just normal, primal, pack behavior -- common to almost all animals, especially those of mating age. Establishing pack order through dominance is natural, no matter how "civilized" we pretend to be. We've tried to sublimate it through sports and other forms of competition, but it's still going to boil over from time to time. It's just the animal in us.

    To me, bloodlust is a different beast altogether. It's more serious than typical dominance play is. All parties are likely to survive a bar fight, but the target of a sociopath consumed with bloodlust isn't likely to survive unless someone intervenes.

    My only point is that I don't think most of what's been discussed so far is skewed very far from normal, whereas I consider bloodlust to be more rarified -- for which society should be eternally grateful.

  43. Gabriel,
    I agree that the affinity for violence discussed here is probably common. My thought is that the difference is a lack of self-disgust at the desires and pleasure.

  44. Do people really get disgusted over a desire to do violence? Do they really repress their animalistic natures that completely? I don't think I could live like that.

    On the other side of it, I don't really get being aroused by the violence. I understand the druglike qualities, certainly, just not the sexual (or sensual) component.

    The desire comes on suddenly, my awareness heightens, time slows to a crawl, my heart starts pounding.

    I was sitting directly behind a kid in my forensics class today, and it struck me. The lecture faded out and all I could feel was the tightening of my muscles and the weight of the garrote in my pocket.

    The teacher's this shrill little harpy, and she'd noticed me drifting off, so she snapped at me. Suddenly I was back in stark reality, as if I'd risen from a haze.

    As should be evident from my usual comments, I'm not normally this flowery with my chatter. The high is just so dreamlike that it's the only way I can talk about it. It's like speedballing.

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  46. @PMS, yep, your in-class experience sounds a little more of a taste of it. When it starts to fill you so that you become obsessed with it, and begin to feel compelled by it, then I think it's reached bloodlust level. But that's just my working definition. YMMV.

    Geez, all this bloodlust talk is making me feel like a brittle diabetic in a room full of people discussing their favorite desserts.

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  49. @Aerianne: Pretty constantly. I have it in a pocket in my coat, which I wear everywhere when I go out. I generally carry a knife or two, as well, but those are mostly for utility. Opening packages, prying things apart, etc.

    @Gabriel: Well, by your definition, probably not full-on bloodlust, yet, then. It definitely rears its head in an obsessive way in my quieter moments, though, as it blocks out most other thoughts while active. But I wouldn't say that I feel compelled, yet. I'm not particularly worried, as I'm confident in my self-control... but I imagine that's what they all say.

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  51. Gabriel said...

    I don't see fist-fighting, especially one-on-one fair fights, as anything approaching bloodlust. That's just normal, primal, pack behavior -- common to almost all animals, especially those of mating age. Establishing pack order through dominance is natural, no matter how "civilized" we pretend to be.

    Is it not also what children do in familys?
    Without bloodshed, and domination of course.
    I think it's caused by reaching maturity, the need to seperate from parents, to find your own power and take control of your own life.
    It allows you to become an individual, rather than an extension of a parent.

  52. PMS you are studying forensics? There is another (intelligent) sociopath on another site that does the same for a living.

    You should totally stalk him.

    (forensic entomology is one of my quantum life careers)

  53. @PMS,

    There are two schools of thought regarding entertaining such thoughts in full-blown fantasy. The conventional "wisdom" is that entertaining violent fantasy makes one more prone to act on it, whether due to habituation or in order to see if the reality would measure up. I'm sure that's true for some people. They probably use it to work up the nerve to act in reality.

    However, I use fantasy as a substitute, not practice. Most of my past shrinks would have been aghast, but my last one thought it was a valuable coping device that made acting out less likely. In my case, he was right.

    So if someone kicks up my bloodlust impulses, I go into my own internal world and do all the things my dark little heart can dream of, then go back to reality. I still get a kick out of knowing what I did, albeit in a fantasy. It's roughly similar to the Native American practice of counting coup, where one symbolically kills his opponent, just to show that he could if he had wanted to.

  54. Sorry for all the double posts. My browser's form filler is trying to make me angry.

    @Aerianne: I think it all took root when I first read about the accounts of the Thuggee in the Asian subcontinent. They used a cloth they wore called a rumal (basically a kerchief) to strangle people in the name of Kali (apparently).

    I made one a few months later, on an impulse. Weighted at both ends with some things I had lying around. I've been carrying it since. I keep it in a pocket of the coat I wear everywhere, just like I do with my keys, my phone, my cigarettes. It's just a part of my normal setup. I also usually carry a few knives, but those are mostly for utility; opening packages, prying things apart, whatever.

    Do I think I'll get much use out of it daily?

    No, not particularly. I suppose it's just that I'd rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it, you know?

    God, I sound more like an addict the every time I post.

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  56. @Medusa: Totally.

    @Gabriel: Where we differ on that is that my fantasies are beginning to spill over into reality. I suppose it may just be that I've never had a well-developed fantasy life, logical thing that I am. And, in many cases, there is no element of fantasy. The mention of choking those women was by no means hyperbole. I think they got some sort of sexual thrill out of it, but for me it was just fading into that haze again. I didn't snap out until they hit me or scratched me. I probably would've killed them, if not for that.

    Maybe I'm just an escapist, and I'm becoming obsessed with my hazy place.

  57. As for the research about the fantasy-action relationship, I read a similar one which suggests that in normal subjects, obsessively imagining a social faux pas or other "shameful" situation on one's own part makes it more likely that one will make the mistake. It's probably related, as you say, to working up nerve, but in a negative and unintentional fashion.

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  59. @PMS,

    I understand spill-over. That's the very reason why I worked on developing fantasy, despite being a logical creature myself. It was tough, because I really didn't have much ability at visualization. But I fought through it until I could imagine myself in a different space that still felt pretty real.

    You may not feel the same, but I found that carrying symbols of my bloodlust (such as sharp things) made self-control more difficult.

  60. Lol... I'll keep it in mind, Aerianne.

    I have too many hobbies as it is, though, I think. I can do things in math that most people can't begin to conceive of, I'm a fine chess player of the Hypermodern school, I love to read, sing, compose, draw, paint. I love typography, too. :D

    Though I do really enjoy not being in prison. :|

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  62. @Aerianne: Being that I haven't even lived that long yet, I am fully cognizant of how very long 27 years would be.

    @Gabriel: I'm not particularly concerned, yet. I've had my moments of lost control, but I'm generally still connected to the world even when I fade out. I can visualize quite well, due to my mathematical background, but it's a very logical sort of visualization, rather than the "safer" fantasy world sort.

    I'm not sure about what effect my carrying has on the overall situation. In some ways, it's a comfort in the manner of a security blanket. I've been struck by the desire even without it, hence my being unsure. I'll do some tests, I suppose. If it's a marked difference, I'll make the necessary changes.

  63. PMS,

    Well, there are several options, of course. Experimenting to find out what allays the urges is one. Learning effective forensic countermeasures is another. And not choosing someone you know always helps. But the unrelenting boredom of prison would surely kill me, so I try to nip it in the bud whenever possible.

    That reminds me of when I think when my family realized I was a chip off the old block. I was still a preschooler when we were watching some cop show, and the detective said there was no such thing as a perfect murder. I asked my parents how the cops would catch you if you killed a total stranger someplace where there weren't people to see you. Maybe that's what precipitated all the psychological testing they put me through. Ya think?

  64. You should see my collection of forensic science books, Gabriel. And then there's that class I'm in, but it's very fluffy compared to what I already know. Between the shelf full of math books and the forensics section, I look like a homicidal mathematician. :/

    I should think that choosing a stranger is obvious, though I think I'll do my best to avoid that decision. Also, I agree wholeheartedly that prison is nothing that I want.

    You sound like you were a hell of a kid, though.

  65. I was a wee tad dark, I'll admit.

    I went through all but two classes in an forensic science MS program at the University of Florida. I liked the blood spatter classes, fingerprints, trace, etc. I didn't like the DNA classes as much as I expected I would.

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  67. blood lust if you dont control it will get you to a very bad place a fun but bad place...or jail/prison. During one of my stints in juvie as a kid i got into a huge brawl and after splitting a kids head with a chair i just couldnt stop after i saw all the blood i started to attack anyone that got to close to me and soon i had gaurds yelling at me, now im not sure if all the other socios can feel pain but unless i break somthing or get hit below the belt a few times i dont stop the pain just rolls off, after maybe four or five stun guns hit me i started to slow down now electricity is my best friend i truly believe if i got the chair i might survive it, but when i finally hit my knees i looked around and there where about 18 to 20 people just laid out aroung me i didnt even know i hit that many people and thats the type of thing you want to avoid because if there are the wrong sort of people around you it could end up far worse than a jail term think death and i know that if socios fear anything its the end of our sick little games...who didnt hate game over screens?

  68. Hey, Gabriel and postmodern, I would like to personally message you guys at some point to discuss other, more personal, things. Is that possible?

  69. Dosn't feel pain? about 18 to 20 just laid out around him?! This sounds even more rediculous than my post. Patrik, what are you the fucking incredible Hulk? If your going to spin bulshit stories at least try to make them a little more, well how should I put this, oh yeah, possible.

  70. Go for it, Justice. Click my name and there should be a link to my email on the page that opens.

    I feel a marriage proposal coming on. ~swoons~

  71. Kay. I'll be sending you a message soon. I have to get back to my homework in realworld land.

    Keep swooning. It makes me happy :)

  72. Marriage proposal, swooning, homework, internet, lawsuit.

  73. Patrik your story is so full of bullocks that I laughed all the way through. You were joking of course?

  74. @Justice,

    If clicking my name doesn't return my email, let me know. Anyone on this forum is welcome to email if they have an offline question or comment.

  75. Gabriel, it didn't work.

  76. patrik is telling the truth, my husband is a full on sociopath. after my explaining in full why he shouldn't he has cut down on the fighting unless they really start it. but when he did everything would slow down and he would fight up to seven huge men at once, and he really isn't a big guy. he would get hit so hard( sometimes with bats) and just keep going he never felt a thing, it was scary because he could easily kill them and not know it, but he is always in a really good mood for the next few hours.

    the point is patrik probably really did do that.

    1. Patrik is lying, he posted as anonymous to try to trick you all.

      Me and his mother are tired of seeing all the posts on these sites where he pretends to be a big man, he is grounded for a full year now.


      See how easy that was?

      Nobody believes you, it's the internet.


  77. You guys are all fucking idiots, posting shit like this online. Go to fucking hell, I can't wait to see you there you fucking idiots. Like seriously, you guys are all a bunch of fucking cowards. If you wanna do something then do it fucktards, if not then shut the fuck up. OOH I CANT WAIT TILL Y'ALL PUSSYS BURN IN FUCKING HELL! SEE YALL THERE BITCHES!!!!!

    1. you kind of sound like a retard

  78. I can't stop my thoughts about killing someone... I have always had a strange need for violence, it makes me feel in peace and relax my mind...I do not fantasize about it out of anger, or towards someone in particular; I only do it looking for the pleasure I would get with it.

  79. I found this post while going down an internet rabbithole. I'm pretty sure I'm not a sociopath, but this sounds exactly like some experiences I've had. Does anyone have any idea what this means?


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