Thursday, August 2, 2012

Our sociopath gets interviewed (part II)

Question 3: Do you consider everyone who is exposed to your tricks as sheep, or are there different types of sheep in your eyes? (People who deserve to be manipulated, who deserve to be hurt, who deservs respect.)

Answer: I think sociopaths view empaths the same way vampires are typically portrayed as viewing mortals. Obviously we think we are better, but there is something charming about empaths. Some can be very innocent and pure like children, which is a novelty. Also, there is sometimes a longing for the simplicity of the life of an empath. Maybe I was evolutionarily meant to rule over others, but having greatness thrust on you is sort of a drag. There's a lot of pressure. I sometimes feel like those rich kids in the '80's movies who dream of just having a normal life. Of course my fondness for empaths does not always keep me from playing tricks on them. There are some absolutely delicious moments in my memory banks from when I've brought sheep to their knees, completely dehumanizing them largely for sport. In those moments, it's impossible not to see the sheep for what I have made them: a weakling, a shadow of a human being. But I give special treatment to sheep that I am fond of, or believe in, or admire, or am grateful to. Singling some sheep out for protection like this is necessary if you want to follow the rule of not defecating where you eat. But I do take a special pleasure in taking out asshole sheep, small-time bullies and crooks, bigots, and the small-minded. Those people serve no purpose that I can see.

Question 4.:What/who does the sociopath respect?

Answer: Ah, respect is a tricky word. I don't know if i feel respect very well. I may admire people who are able to cultivate power, but I don't respect authority figures. I admire religions and cultural institutions that are able to captivate their audience so completely in the sense that I want to learn from them, emulate them. I also admire people who do great things, the courageous, the innovators. I will "respect" competent people in a certain way because I will generally not interfere with their world--I let them do their own thing undisturbed. And I am entirely devoted to efficiency, although that doesn't really fit the term "respect" either. I feign respect and deference when it seems like it will help me get what I want, particularly in dealing with petty tyrants.

Question 5. Do you have a sense of the future? Like dreaming and planning about your next job, your next spouse, your next source of glory? Or is it just about now?

Answer: I don't dream about the future so much as scheme. Everything I do is more about what is the best use of my time right now then it is deferring to some future enjoyment of the fruits of my labors. People sometimes do a double take when they find out I'm a sociopath--they think sociopaths are supposed to be irresponsible financial leaches with never a thought for tomorrow. In contrast, I have always been very interested in making money and have taken advantage of many investment opportunities. But this isn't because I dream of a better tomorrow. Oddly enough, those investments feel like instant gratification to me. I get a good deal of pleasure and satisfaction from them because I know I made the smart choice and am gaming the system by finding above-average yielding investments. Of course the smart choice is only smart because those investments will eventually make me piles of money, but I feel like I have already received my payoff in making the choice at all.

I will sometimes put a lot of time and effort into a big set up for a game, usually a seduction, but the glory for me isn't in the end result but in the execution. If my target gives in prematurely, I would be disappointed. Once a seduction target is seduced, they just become a liability. It is only while they still save some shred of self-respect that they make a suitable companion. So that too is more about the moment than about some deferred day of glory. And I typically don't look for marks or plan for them--they find me.

98 comments:

  1. Nietzsche says we should take pride in our opponents.
    I agree with not taking joy in the outcome of a "game" but rather with the execution. For me, it's not necessarily about the accumulation of power or even the rush of doing it, playing some game or whatever. With me it's more like just an expression of the absurd. Positing the absurd almost like doing ritual magic.
    Now for you dumbasses out there, I don't mean "the absurd" in the sense of Camus or Sartre or any other dumbasses. But more like in the sense of Kierkegaard. Check out his sense of irony in his parables.
    Expand your mind, bitches.

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    1. This post sums up my entire life beginning from my childhood. Everything seemed absurd and ritualistic. I'll have to check out some books. I had no idea and am only now realizing that at the same time I was fidgeting with being gay I was also crying out for help with my sociopathy. I liked watching murders on tv. Psychopaths who would laugh while shooting machine guns at innocent villagers would enthrall me and I wanted to be like him. To have his brain at 8 years old.

      I once told my friend in 6th grade in the computer lab with a flat-tone I can't feel pain. So he gave me a titty twister and I stared at him then called out. "That's not what I meant." I didn't really get what I meant until now. Wow. If ignorance is bliss and knowledge is power I've hit the karma jackpot of a life.

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    2. You do realize children ARE psychopathic in their thoughts and behavior. They are self centerd, with little to no thought of others, and everything gets manipulated to stimulate them. You weren't a sociopath crying for help at 8, you were a confused child just looking for answers like any other kid. I'm not saying you aren't a psycho now, I don't know; just don't get your shit twisted any further, k?

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    3. This whole thing brings up the questions of nature vs nuture for me. I'm just a man and I can't look from the outside in still I'm not sure if I was born as asshole or some fated event triggered my anti-social personality when I was 2 and it was all downhill from there. Thinking back, I can't remember a single instance of having a friend. I can remember being my friends and interacting with them but I've always fallen into friendships. I've never had or needed a friend.

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    4. Yeah anon. I know that. Still it seems significant to me and I'm not sure how to validate my experience. I know children are basically sociopathic but mine just seems to go a bit deeper. It's like no one gets me but I don't care. Shit, I'm a teenager.

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    5. From what I have gathered and how the information I have researched makes the most sense to me is anti-social personality disorder seems to be a gentic thing, you genetically never mature emotionally and this causes the defensive mechanisms to come out that an ASPD would disply. I think the social environment then plays apart in how that disorder will further manifest itself; "normal" ASPD, socipathy, psychopathy. So, if your emotional progression stopped at say 12/13 that's where you still are at emotionally. Perhaps then you grew up in an environment that allowed you to act openly more and lash out more and hence developed into an extreme sociopath. Maybe you had to hide your actions more and live behind the lies in order to survie and developed into more of a subtle psychopath.
      I believe both the nature and the nurture play equal amouts in ASPDs and can have nearly an unlimited amout of possible outcomes. Their effects are what what makes the psycho the individual that he is. Bundy wasn't Gacy and Stalin wasn't Pol Pot.

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    6. That's stupid. It's not that sociopaths randomly one day stopped growing emotionally. Their brains are hardwired to seek rewards without consideration for much else.

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  2. Oh yeah, that was me, Vigilius.
    -Vigilius

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  3. The ritual or preparation involved in the games we play bring me much more satisfaction than the outcome.

    Think of a mousetrap, sans rodent.

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  4. Replies
    1. In my reality, Poptart. I know how blessed I am, and I'm grateful for it. :)

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  5. Whats the point of plotting if aren't going to put it to use?!

    Believe me. I love strategy. But I love being right, even more than I love thinking about being right.

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  6. vampires?
    really????
    ...

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  7. This post should have been deleted by author.....

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  8. Very interesting post, i can relate to the sheep part well. Its like most people were put on earth to be used. But there is just that thing that i just find very fascinating about those people, something that makes me sometimes choose not to use them even though i easily could.

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  9. Has anyone ever thought that the poster lives in a little bit of a fantasy world? Sociopath communities that view themselves as vampires towards mortals?

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  10. ukan if tnp is not a sociopath what would you say he is then?

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    1. Dammit Post, it seems I can't reveal my painting of TNP now :(

      I took too long. Oh well.

      Themes, humor me, give me a song, I don't even care if it makes fun of me. I need to feel special.

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    2. I had one for you, yesterday, but the fit was not as tight as I like but since you asked :D

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    3. You painted him before me? My poor ego.~ :D

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    4. Haha, once you see what I painted I assure you your ego will remain even more intact than it already is.

      I was painting UKan when my pops stepped in and interrupted. I haven't painted since. So far UKan is a face with no features.....not too far off ;)

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    5. Brilliant! Give him a steak instead of an apple before his face and you'll be right on the money.

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    6. So far UKan is a face with no features.....not too far off ;)

      Perhaps you should post it as is...

      I was painting UKan when my pops stepped in and interrupted.

      ... because this is kind of perfect.

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    7. TNP called himself a cruel mentor.

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    8. TNP was always one of my favorites.

      Is he really that near to death? Has he been around in the past couple weeks?

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    9. I hope he's alright.

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  11. Are there other parts of this we can read in the archives before they get put up?

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  12. Kany
    I have a question for you.I am not saying this to be a jerk. I am trying to understand your mind, as I think you are trying to understand mine.

    Your husband just made fun of a person who just lost a baby. What do you do with that? How does that make you feel about him/ toward him? How do your thought processes deal with something like this and put it into a place in your mind ( and heart)

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    1. why do you have a picture of some retarded looking kid as your avatar? Is that you?

      Piles

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    2. No, I think it is just cute.

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    3. Why is it something I have to deal with? My husband can be a ruthless and terrible person... downright sinful. But I'm not judgemental. :-)

      Seriously, I don't curse him for his nature. He outweighs his ruthlessness,and even uses it in positive ways. This place is a vent for that so he doesn't misdirect it into our life, and toward our friends. And besides, she was deluding herself, and she can't believe in lies forever... just like you can't. And painful honesty is the best and easiest way to make someone learn something. If it hurts, you know you feel it.

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    4. At any rate, why don't you stop insulting me, for a brief period, as I would like to share some things with you, but I can't when you insult me, as who could?

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    5. How am I insulting you? Please, share, Monica. I'm not intending to offend you. I'm just trying to make it clear that you hide things from yourself, and it causes you more pain than pleasure.

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    6. Well, you go behind me when I compliment Cesar and say I like Narcs. I know I have a lot of faults and would like to work on them, but let ME come to my conclusions with your help. Don't make the conclusions for me

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    7. OK, Monica. You're right, there.

      So what is it about alter ego you like?

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    8. Thank you
      Well, I like a lot of things about Alterego. I don't like some. I think she has courage. She wants to face herself.

      What I don't like is that she does not seem to take constructive criticism. She takes it as an insult, when it is not.

      Alter shows me that it is not a fait accompli that a sociopath must stay a sociopath. God can make each person new. That means that all old constructs in the personality/mind can be taken away and are no longer even a factor in the person's life, but this takes a great deal of time and persistence.

      When a person is Born Again, he is new. Alterego is not a sociopath, anymore, by her own admission, I think.
      At any rate, the new birth makes everyone new.

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    9. Urges... I have to stop coming to the comments.

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    10. What makes you think she was a sociopath?

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    11. ... I see.
      so what about when she was questioned about that and self proclaimed she wasn't? That she was just fighting aspects of herself? Weren't you watching all that?

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    12. So when she was subjected to review, you feel her original hypothesis was correct over the peer reviewed accepted conclusion? Why would you go with what she said before as being correct?

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    13. She is born again. All old things have passed away and she is new. BUT, the person must persist in replacing old habits which are ingrained.Old habits include old thinking patterns of being ego driven.

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    14. But why does her being born again mean even though she said she isn't, and wasn't, that she was a sociopath before?

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    15. She said she was a sociopath, before.
      "Sociopath" is a label/ a name. All labels/names are done away with, when one is Born Again. The person has changed inside.This is literal, not figurative. What does remain are the old habit patterns and ingrained thinking/ ego) which must be worked on, so she has changed from being a sociopath to not being a sociopath. I think this is what she was saying in the Forum.

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    16. You're deflecting. She said she never claimed to be a sociopath before... before she was saved, in addition to now. Why are you the only one that still thinks she's a sociopath? I think you credit her to supernatural rightness about everything because she alleges she's saved.

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    17. I heard her say she was a sociopath before she got Born Again, but let's drop it. What is the point of this discussion about Alterego, Kany?

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    18. Medusa
      You said some very wise things about me. I appreciate it, a great deal. Thank you!

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    19. I'm wondering why you think she's a sociopath gone saved, and why you refuse to believe she's a narcissist. Is it because you like her?

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    20. She SAID she was a sociopath and now is not. What is so hard to figure out about this, Kany?
      Anyway, why do you keep asking about it? I don't understand?

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    21. It wasn't a favor, Monica, just the truth.

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    22. Yes, I know you are honest, Medusa. Why would I stay at this crazy place, if it were not for honesty ~

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    23. She also SAID she WAS not a sociopath, in retrospect after discussing it with the sociopaths. So why isn't she a narcissist? And why MUST she be a sociopath because she says she is? Is she a doctor? Why do you so strongly take that opinion as fact?

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    24. Ok she is a narcissist. WHAT is the big deal with this, Kany?

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    25. Just curious. So what is it you feel ready to discus?

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    26. Perhaps the only important thing here is that she believed she was a sociopath, and not whether she actually was one or not.

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    27. I am going to bed, Friends. It has been a wonderful day in the neighborhood. See you, tomorrow.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8w9xk4hUKoQ

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    28. Hmm. Good point. How do you discredit belief?

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    29. Belief creates your whole paradigm. To discredit belief is to discredit your world.

      So, I suppose, your world has to crumble first.

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    30. Or at least change, I suppose. And no one wants that.

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    31. They do, but only in limited amounts.

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    32. Well, delusional people don't want change. That's why they're delusional. But admittedly some people love change.

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    33. I'm really excited for you, Medusa. That's such an awesome discovery for you. Figuring out ones own pattern is such a huge deal for making changes.

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    34. Figuring out ones own pattern is such a huge deal for making changes.


      Very true, Kany.

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    35. This whole exchange reads like a game of broken telephone.

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    36. "Very true, Kany."

      Monica, you're being played again. You need to stop being such a waffling sucker. By placating your abusers, you hand over your personal power to them on a silver platter. In this way, you perpetually victimize yourself. It is a dangerous pattern rooted in low self-worth. Break out of it.

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    37. Alterego
      I appreciate your opinion. I really, really do. However,
      I see things differently than you. I am here to individuate. That means to have a self. To me, having a self is being and saying who I am. I am well aware that Kany could turn on me, on a dime. In fact, I am sure she will. My goal is not to get Kany to like me. My goal is to develop a stronger me, like a muscle.
      Hence, I go through my various journeys here, with that in mind. I am like Mario. Sometimes, I fall in a hole. Sometimes, I climb a hill. Sometimes, I walk down a street. However, at any moment, a pothole may appear.

      Ha, sounds like life~

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    38. That isn't the point.

      You do not develop true strength by placating your abusers. Think of the situation in which you handed power over to your abusive ex, only to witness your son take his own life. How did you allow this to happen?

      Please understand that I am not blaming you for your son's death; I am encouraging you to acknowledge and take ownership of a malignant pattern.

      When you attempt to conciliate with your abusers, you accord them personal power. You internalize their malevolent influence and compromise yourself in the process, whether or not you consciously acknowledge this.

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    39. No Alterego
      I face the abusers and I don't give myself up, this time

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    40. As always happens with me, I have some friends who stand with me, and stand on my side. Here is no exception. I could not do this without them. They know who they are <3

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    41. Monica, you are decompensating, not "facing your abusers". Nobody is "standing on your side" here. You are simply beginning to identify with what your abusers are feeding you. It is a slow process, but make no mistake about it: Kany knows exactly what she is doing. You are a fool if you think otherwise.

      Again, you reject true wisdom so as to line yourself up with your aggressors. Until you can acknowledge and change this, you will continue to get batted around like prey.

      I'm done here.

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    42. Alterego
      WHO talks on and on trying to convince people of things? You do. You seem to need approval or something from these people.
      Most people here are vicious assholes, but not every single person. You are not and several others are not, either.
      Alter, you need to know that no one's approval of you, here, matters. That is where I am ahead of you.

      I care for a few people here,but the rest are not worth it. I don't think YOU have figured that out, not me.

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    43. Monica, you are projecting again. Why should you care what *anyone* thinks here? That you do speaks volumes about why you should leave.

      If I cared about anyone's approval here, I would have scurried off a long time ago. I am not a victim. I do not internalize abuse.

      Delete
    44. If so, why do you explain yourself ad infinitum? I don't have a Forum account but I wanted to come up and say "WHY?" You are worth more than that, Alterego.

      Delete
  13. Kindness is NOT a weakness, it is a manifestation of STRENGTH

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  14. What would you call a person who
    has no empathy
    has no lust for power
    has no lust for wealth
    is motivated by nothing but revenge
    has no remorse
    is violent
    is sadistic

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  15. "Maybe I was evolutionarily meant to rule over others, but having greatness thrust on you is sort of a drag."

    I must have blacked out somewhere and missed the part about sociopaths being more evolved because similar power seeking behavior is found in lower primates while cooperation is most responsible for any success humankind has had.

    I do have two questions though... Do you think empathetic people need sociopathic people more that sociopathic people need empathetic people?

    If two worlds existed, one with all sociopaths and the other with all empaths, which would prosper? (assume the parasitic sociopaths are unable to infiltrate the cooperative empath people.) Also we will play god and start them out with 2000 people since obviously sociopaths wouldn't make it past the adam and eve stage.


    Maybe at the next empaths only meeting we'll discuss how we can assist the children/sociopaths to play nice and maybe they'll be allowed at the adults table next year.

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  16. Too bad we'll never know the outcome of the investments that are going to bring in piles of money. Seen that one on here before.

    The site seems more fake than I remember.

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    Replies
    1. It always seems that way when I leave for a bit and then come back.

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  17. My ex husband sleeps with me then leaves. I get hurt each time because I still love him or who I thought he was. He mader go through hell in court , saying I was an unfit mother and mentally I'll. He backed me up against the wall with his hands arounde neck and said I'll kill you if u ruin my reputation, he also let me be homeless and took my daughter away from me. WHY do I let Jim sleep with me?????????? Our love making is do passionate and firry

    ReplyDelete

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