Thursday, June 14, 2012

The gendered sociopath

A reader writes about how sociopathic men understand women differently than normal men:

It seems to be common among a good majority of men that, men just "can't understand" women. Like they can't understand why women act certain ways about certain things, or why they feel certain ways of certain things that the men can't seem to understand.

Do you think this applies to sociopathic men? Me, I've always considered myself an abstract thinker, I don't see any big mystery behind women. I understand women are psychologically different and therefore emotionally value certain things in a different manner. Yet, somehow, 'normal' men do not understand this?

Are "normal" men just so involved in their own emotional impulses that it blinds them from understanding the emotional impulses of women? Perhaps sociopaths are not blinded because they are not heavily involved in their emotions, and as a result they can better understand the emotional impulses of others, namely, members of the opposite sex.

I thought it was an interesting theory, and probably accurate. I believe that sociopaths don't project their own mental states on people as often as empaths do (or even other non empaths because narcissists and autism spectrum types also project all the time, with autism spectrum people not having hardly any theory of mind at all).

For the sociopath, it's not any big mystery that men and women think differently and it's as easy to understand the one as the other. It could also have something to do with the fact that sociopaths don't identify as much with their gender, so do not have the same gender specific blindspots as most people do.


  1. My last kick into self diagnosing before getting bored.
    OK, let's see what we have here:

    Key symptoms of a Psychopath/Sociopath:
    1. Glib and superficial +
    2. Egocentric and grandiose +/-
    3. Lack of remorse or guilt +
    4. Lack of empathy +
    5. Deceitful and manipulative +
    6. Shallow emotions +

    Considerable superficial charm +
    Absence of delusions +/-
    Absence of anxiety +
    Unreliability, disregard for obligations, no sense of responsibility, in matters of little and great import. +
    Untruthfulness and insincerity. +
    Antisocial behavior +/-
    Inadequately motivated antisocial behavior. +
    Poor judgment and failure to learn from experience. ++
    Pathological egocentricity. Total self-centeredness and an incapacity for real love and attachment. +/-
    General poverty of deep and lasting emotions. +
    Lack of any true insight; inability to see oneself as others do. +
    Ingratitude for any special considerations, kindness and trust. ++
    Fantastic and objectionable behavior +
    No history of genuine suicide attempts. ++++++
    An impersonal, trivial, and poorly integrated sex life. +/-
    Failure to have a life plan and to live in any ordered way (unless it is for destructive purposes or a sham). +++

    1. Sociopathy (stuff that fits):
      Glibness and Superficial Charm, Grandiose Sense of Self (I don't think that I'm the best or something, but I wouldn't sacrifice myself for others), Pathological Lying, Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt, Shallow Emotions, Incapacity for Love, Need for Stimulation, Callousness/Lack of Empathy, Poor Behavioral Controls (no) /Impulsive Nature (yes), Early Behavior Problems (don't know how many shit I had to do to get this :/ ) Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc. maybe:), Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle (totaly, I don't know what am I going to be yet), Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility (Changes their image as needed to avoid prosecution. Changes life story readily)(yep), Promiscuous Sexual Behavior (not yet).
      Other Related Qualities:

      1. Contemptuous of those who seek to understand them +
      2. Does not perceive that anything is wrong with them +/- (I might be a socio, but there's nothing wrong with me)
      3. Authoritarian +
      4. Secretive +
      5. Paranoid +
      6. Only rarely in difficulty with the law, but seeks out situations where their tyrannical behavior will be tolerated, condoned, or admired +
      7. Conventional appearance +
      8. Goal of enslavement of their victim(s) +
      9. Exercises despotic control over every aspect of the victim's life +/-
      10. Has an emotional need to justify their crimes and therefore needs their victim's affirmation (respect, gratitude and love) +
      11. Ultimate goal is the creation of a willing victim +
      12. Incapable of real human attachment to another ++
      13. Unable to feel remorse or guilt +
      14. Extreme narcissism and grandiose +/-
      15. May state readily that their goal is to rule the world +++ :D

      About being in control of my actions:

    2. Narcissism:
      # Reacts to criticism with anger, shame, or humiliation +/--
      # May take advantage of others to reach their own goals +
      # Tends to exaggerate their own importance, achievements, and talents -
      # Imagines unrealistic fantasies of success, beauty, power, intelligence, or romance +/-
      # Requires constant attention and positive reinforcement from others -
      # Easily becomes jealous -
      # Lacks empathy and disregards the feelings of others +
      # Obsessed with oneself +/- (I'm obbsesed with thinking and right now I'm a good project)
      # Mainly pursues selfish goals +
      # Trouble keeping healthy relationships +
      # Is easily hurt and rejected -
      # Sets unrealistic goals +/-
      # Wants "the best" of everything ---
      # Appears as tough-minded or unemotional +
      * Believing that you're better than others -
      * Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness +/- (goal making)
      * Exaggerating your achievements or talents -
      * Expecting constant praise and admiration -
      * Believing that you're special and acting accordingly -
      * Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings +
      * Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans +
      * Taking advantage of others +
      * Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior +
      * Being jealous of others -
      * Believing that others are jealous of you -
      * Trouble keeping healthy relationships +
      * Setting unrealistic goals +/-
      * Being easily hurt and rejected -
      * Having a fragile self-esteem +/-
      * Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional +

      Narc causes:
      * An oversensitive temperament at birth -
      * Excessive admiration that is never balanced with realistic feedback -
      * Excessive praise for good behaviors or excessive criticism for bad behaviors in childhood +
      * Overindulgence and overvaluation by parents --
      * Being praised for perceived exceptional looks or abilities by adults -/+
      * Severe emotional abuse in childhood +/-
      * Unpredictable or unreliable caregiving from parents -
      * Valued by parents as a means to regulate their own self-esteem -

    3. Aspergers (maybe Im a high aspie :/ ):

      Problems with social skills +/-
      Eccentric or repetitive behaviors -
      Unusual preoccupations or rituals -
      Communication difficulties +/- (compensated with manipulations)
      Limited range of interests -
      Coordination problems +/-
      Skilled or talented +/-

      Not pick up on social cues and may lack inborn social skills, such as being able to read others' body language, start or maintain a conversation, and take -
      # Dislike any changes in routines. +/-
      # Appear to lack empathy. +
      # Be unable to recognize subtle differences in speech tone, pitch, and accent that alter the meaning of others’ speech. So your child may not understand a joke or may take a sarcastic comment literally. And his or her speech may be flat and hard to understand because it lacks tone, pitch, and accent. -
      # Have a formal style of speaking that is advanced for his or her age. For example, the child may use the word "beckon" instead of "call" or the word "return" instead of "come back." +
      # Avoid eye contact or stare at others. -
      # Have unusual facial expressions or postures. +/- (I like to play with facial expressions)
      # Be preoccupied with only one or few interests, which he or she may be very knowledgeable about. Many children with Asperger's syndrome are overly interested in parts of a whole or in unusual activities, such as designing houses, drawing highly detailed scenes, or studying astronomy. They may show an unusual interest in certain topics such as snakes, names of stars, or dinosaurs. +/- (I have many interests I'm advanced in)
      # Talk a lot, usually about a favorite subject. One-sided conversations are common. Internal thoughts are often verbalized. +/-
      # Have delayed motor development. Your child may be late in learning to use a fork or spoon, ride a bike, or catch a ball. He or she may have an awkward walk. Handwriting is often poor. - (I am a quick learner, but handwriting sucks)
      # Have heightened sensitivity and become overstimulated by loud noises, lights, or strong tastes or textures. ---

    4. Could be, but I am too lazy to care about stuff around, I don't count steps and so on. And I don't do things repeatedly, don't want to be perfect, my room isn't tidy... Maybe I am disordered like this a little, but can't tell right now, need to do more reaserch.

    5. The need to post all that stuff you posted above is one example of your OCD-like behaviour.

    6. I don't say that I disagree with you, but could you tell me why it's an example? And how can OCD be related with sociopathy? I mean, I acted same even before I found that label, so if I act like a socio because of OCD, it's still weird.

      I am doing reaserch... on Mee... so posting long posts is a part of it, you should see my big folder... :)

      P.S. I tend to over-do things, I think. Is it because of OCD?? :/
      P.P.S. I don't think that OCD fits, actually, but I can give it a try.

    7. Who says OCD has to be related to sociopathy?

    8. So I have an OCD PD and act like I have an ASPD? Why?
      And really, I don't fit to it, I could write symptoms and + - again, but it would be a waste of space, or should I? :)

    9. OCD Symptom Report
      Today's Date: 06/14/12
      Name: Mee
      Symptom: Repeating questions over and over
      Symptom: Excessive list making
      Comments: And only in SW, lol

      ( )

    10. And I wasn't making lists, it was more like ctrl+c, ctrl+v :/

    11. I didn't say OCPD. That's different than OCD. Besides, I am not diagnosing you, I'm just saying you display OCD-like behaviour, namely in your obsession with finding 'the answer'.

      OCD doesn't really relate to sociopathy, as it's an anxiety issue. Sociopaths are not usually very anxious. The only thing they have in common is the need to control their environments.

    12. My 2 cents. You don't have an OCD vibe. You don't have an Aspie vibe. You are much too personable to be an Aspie. I interact with one. I want to strangle her. She is so annoying. She seems very unaware of how she appears to others. I see that as a big attribute of Aspies. They are like a Mr Magoo walking through life. You seem very,very intelligent and self questioning. This is fantastic as the unexamined life is not worth living imo

    13. Oh, stupid mee. Well I really am displaying OCD behaviour in the way you said. But I am not anxious/worried, so I relate to it only in the current situation right now :)
      And about that 'answer finding' - I simply rolled out everything else (haven't read much about some disorders, because they didn't fit from the begining, but still). So Sociopathy/Psychopathy is all that's left to define me :D
      But I don't want to be defined, never did, that's why I keep questioning can I be sociopath, here. It's all that left, but seriously, having this kind of label is risky :( (that's why I don't understand people, who play socios)

    14. Monica, I have one good friend, who might be an aspie. I like to have him around, because he is easy to control, I can talk about anything I want with him (sometimes he replies, if he's interested), I made him to like few things I like and then he talks more about these things, so we maintain a nice conversation this way. He's like my pocket friend :)
      But he seems smart :/

    15. Pocket friend, one step up from invisible friend. Mee, would you like me to ask you some questions. I think may help you define yourself, more? My socio g/f was born a sociopath. She has let me pick her brain. What is very interesting is that she could not take the bullying that went on at SW. She thought it was stupid. She thinks a person that picks on a weaker person, for fun and games, is an asshole. She said she was born without empathy. She is not an asshole and she is not a bully. She was born with a deficit. She does not exalt it. She does not see it as superior to empaths. She sees it as a deficit such as being born without a limb. I have told her that I wonder if she was truly born without empathy or it was trauma to which she is unaware. She does not know, but is open to that possibility.

      At any rate, I learned some things from her that I can share with you, if you want, in the form of questions to you.

    16. I feel so fucking bad, because I have to relate to what you wrote about her, lol.
      But I am adaptive and I learned to use "lol" and swear in this place and I only do it here :)
      I don't think that this bullyig is stupid, I believe that if someone does something, s/he has a reason to act like this. But it's a little bit silly, indeed.
      I'm really getting bored of this diagnosing, but sure, why not.

    17. Ok I will do it little by little, one thought at a time. If your Aspie friend, for example, said that his mother/father/ brother just died. How would you feel? What would you feel, if anything?

    18. Long answer: His family makes no difference to me. I wouldn't care, but I might try to understand how he feels and maybe talk to him, to make him feel better (if he would turn out to be sad), or I would simply avoid him for a while, because sad friend is not a very useful one, or act like nothing happened. But that's because he's my good friend. When I heard that one of my friends, who was friend only because we were at the same class, mother died I felt nothing, didn't cared and didn't even asked how he feels (well I didn't knew that I probably should ask then). But I observed him a little to see how this changed him.
      To add: everybody dies, if I would be responsible for his mothers/fathers/brothers death then it would be different, because I would be in trouble and would need to play that I am sorry and so on.
      It's good that I am male, I don't have to cry and can pretend that I am shocked deep down inside.

      Short answer: I would feel nothing about it.

      Which answering way is better?

    19. OK, what if the person(or pet) you love the most, dies. How would you feel? Not feel etc?

    20. I don't know your age either. Are you under 18?

    21. so much posts narc about yourself narc?
      (does a narc aspie exsist?)

    22. Chill. A person can ask about himself without being accused of being a Narc. Go take a Ritalin.

    23. All healthy people are narcissistic.
      Obviously people can ask about themselves.
      This anon simply felt that his narcissism wasn't fed enough and s/he wanted to get attention and it was a pathetic atempt of bullying :)

      Monica, i would feel the same way you feel then you loose your mobile phone. You are sad, annoyed, interested how/where/when you lost it and think about getting a new one.
      I'm busy right now, so my answering will take time for a while :(
      Oh, I am near 18.

    24. There is no time element, Mee. We will just talk when we do. I am thinking about your answers, anyway, and thinking about what I will ask next. x

    25. It is for me, because I'm probably the most inpatient person even here :)
      And then will you share what you will understand? I'm not saying that you should do it now, but I'm trying to figure out how this will work :)

    26. Well, go down to UKans link on shallow emotions. Can you relate to these. Mee?

    27. Yes, then I will give my opinion from my limited understanding, but it is still some.

    28. Yes and that idea of Jack Abbot is pretty good.
      I should say something about narcissism. I don't fit it because I don't need attention and I like being alone, then I am. I prefer crowded streets, because most of people pay less attention to each other there, and there are plenty of people for me to observe. I don't seek attention, unless I need something from a person, then I let that person know that I want something from him/her.
      And I can recognise narcissistic douchebags. They always try to look and act cool, often wear clothes of the latest fashion and so on. It's interesting how they change then they think that no one sees them. Also since they always HAVE to look cool, they need to be cooler and cooler until they reach their limits and explode, start being vunerable, need other people attention even more and later they get back on foot and pretend to be cool again.
      I'm nothing like them, lol. I don't pay attention to myself, like I don't do to others. Well my mother with a few narc traits always pushed me to pay more attention in her and myself and so on, so I developed a taste in clothing, etc.. Anyway, most of a time I am wearing shirts, because they look good anywhere and I don't have to think, actually I don't know what could I wear.
      Also, I don't like clothes with text or pictures on them, because I either don't support what's in there or I don't want to give information about my interests to people around (no idea why).
      So narc is a no go, I think :)

  2. Replies
    1. And second, and third, and fourth and fifth. Y U No post in forum like other wannabees? :)

    2. Honestly, I haven't thought about that :)

  3. According to Nietzsche, when you describe human agency you must first make sure your description is not idealistic, or your description will be worthless. According to common sense, basing our judgement of human conduct on terms like “glib” or “Shallow” or “Grandiose” or “egocentric” is even worse than using idealistic terms, because they actually pretend to be scientific. Please, if we want to have a bit of a grasp on reality let’s try to be serious and find out what are we speaking about when we say somebody is “egocentric” or “glib”. In SW, most of the time, people who identify themselves as sociopaths show themselves absolutely at odds even with the general, vague meaning of these words; if we defined our staple terms a little better I guess the level of self delusion would go down a bit, and this has become quite urgent in SW, really.

    1. I don't know anything about Nietzsche, but I'm willing to bet he understood what 'glib' and 'grandiose' mean and how to accurately recognise and apply them. They're not pseudo-scientific, they're just very specific adjectives that we accept as applying to a particular way of behaving. I don't agree that they're vague at all.

      I'm intrigued Jose - why do you think we need a new set of descriptors?

    2. I agree. The urgency of people at sociopath world being able to objectively see themselves is getting almost to the point of being dire!

    3. When you take words and redefine them, you are the one suffering from delusions, Juan. Get a grip. Instead of educating yourself you wrap yourself in fear. Fear of things you don't understand. That's why you fear psychology, science, and society so much. It's because you don't understand it at all. You are too young.

    4. None of you have the slightest idea what a scientific term is or how to use it.

    5. I think it's been established for a while now that you most certainly don't either.

      Also, how many people here have you seen call themselves sociopaths? You talk like there is some horde here with HELLO name tags that say 'sociopath'.

    6. You don't believe in science, juan, so don't give me that rubbish. The lot of us live in the real world. You live in fantasy. You think nobody can be defined. Wrong. You just don't have the insight or perception to define them and your projecting that defiecency on everyone else

    7. Let’s see what happens when we take a term as little vague and supposedly well defined as “violence” and try to test its scientific value, defining scientific value as the predictive power of the conclusions of assessments based upon such term. I will cite a Canadian psychology paper you can find in this link:
      “There is lack of agreement among clinicians as to what constitutes violent behavior and on the definition of violence or dangerousness. Some scholars have reported the existence of more than 250 different definitions of aggression in the [field] literature … a violent act has been defined to include only injury to others; to include injury to others or the destruction of property; and both physical and psychological injury. Violent fantasies thoughts or threats have also being considered as dangerous. Writing a bad cheque is seen as dangerous behavior because it affects the economy. It has been pointed out that, due to the lack of definition as to what the clinician is supposed to predict, many personal biases affect his/her prediction. Such lack of agreement causes confusion and conflict among clinicians. This in turn results in arbitrariness and unfairness in the prediction process and decision making… Clinicians do not get a chance to empirically test the accuracy of their predictions. There is no systematic follow up in place to give predictors feedback about the results of their predictions. This results in clinicians making the same mistake daily and for many years, without improvement.”

    8. If mental health professionals openly admit they cannot predict something so apparently concrete and matter-of-fact as aggression accurately with all the tools at their disposal, do we seriously think they’ll be able to predict the behavior of a person, let’s say a sociopath, using ghostly, poetic concepts like “Glib charm” or “Lack of remorse” or “Deceit”?

    9. Juan Valdez, the coffee dude with the stash

    10. Glib, deciet, and lack of remorse are only new words to you juan. The rest of us have a solid definition of what that means. You need to finish school and experience a little of the world.

  4. You cannot be glib and impulsive at the same time, as you cannot be cruel and have shallow emotions at the same time. Those are very deep contradictions. If you are admittedly a glib person, you can never feel that something matters, and impulsive people often feel that “something” matters too much. Cruel people enjoy hurting others; people with shallow emotions don’t care much for hurting or pleasing others, or even themselves. If you use the words “glib” and “impulsive” as attributes for the same person, you imply that one of the two is only make believe.

    1. You can't be just glib or just impulsive all the time. You can have shallow emotions that can grow into cruel emotions. But yeah, you have a point :)

    2. Cruel emotions are not shallow; that's why I say those terms should be defined if we want to use them seriously. In their present state they can mean about anything for about anybody.

    3. No, they can't. They can mean a spectrum of things within the bounds of the definitions of them.

    4. It's not that these words are not defined Juan. It's that you don't know the definition of them. To you not understanding the definition means you should redefine it all together to whatever you brain farted today.

    5. If in the specialized literature you can find according to some scholars 250 different definitions of aggression, which is a concept profane readers will consider objective and clear, imagine what clinicians would do with terms like “glib” or “egocentrical”: I don’t expect a moron like Ukan’t to understand it, of course, but it’s sufficiently clear for a six year old. Dr. Loza says: “It has been pointed out that, due to the lack of definition as to what the clinician is supposed to predict, many personal biases affect his/her prediction”. If I haven’t got a universal definition of “glib” for instance, I cannot use that term in the analysis of the personality of an individual and therefore I cannot base accurate predictions of the behavior of a sociopath on the “fact” that he/she posesses a “glib” charm.

    6. cold and charming?

    7. I'm not the one who can't figure out the definition of a word, juan. You are trying to say you can't be glib and impulsive at the same time. That's one of the dumbest and most ignorant statements you've made yet. I have to wonder if you've even made it out of secondary yet, because your grasp of even fundamental stuff is terrible. You remain ignorant because you think you know everything and instead of educating yourself you close your ears and keep blabbing on about stuff you have no clue about. You think clinicians are a bunch of idiots? Laughable. You haven't any education let alone any degrees let alone any research to sit there and try to rearrange anything that has to do with psychology. You are a ignorant fool.

    8. Jose, god, Ukan may be insidious sometimes, but you're just a pretentious delusional twat. You have absolutely no idea what you're saying. Stop making up your own definitions, you talk about bias colouring one's views, yet you're demonstrating that. But I'm just another fool, aren't I ubermensch?

    9. You can call me a lot of things but delusional is not one of them. I'm well aware of who I am and I'm not on here like most people trying to paint a prettier picture. I just give it to you straight.

    10. Was referring to Jose. Or as you call him 'Juan'.

    11. Oh ok I see now. You called me sometimes insidious. I guess I can't argue with that or I'd be delusional.

    12. Insidious. How is that the right word?

    13. More subjective labels! Society once again tried to define me, but I'm too special to be defined by such trite descriptions.

  5. No he doesn't have a point! That's the dumbest thing I've ever read by Jose. Why can't you have shallow emotions and be cruel? Who's to say that you have to enjoy being cruel to be cruel? And who's to say pleasure isnt a shallow emotion? I would say it is the shallowest of emotions, seeing as every human motivation can be broken down to avoidance of pain and gravitation toward pleasure. Maybe enjoying cruelty is the basest of emotions, and thereby the shallowest and least complex.
    God you're such an idiot!

    1. ha ha ha ha Pleasure a shallow emotion! only if pleasure is shallow, but in that case, it is not real pleasure, and if you don't really enjoy other people's pain, you aren't really cruel.

    2. They call it shallow affect because psychopaths feel only primal basic emotions. Again please look up the definition of something before debating it here. Its like yelling the sky is red! When you haven't even been outside in your life before. You're no psychopath and you're no psychologist either. So why don't you shut the fuck up for a second and learn something before you speak, instead of blabbing on topics where you yave no education or experience.

      Better to close your mouth and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

    3. Please, explain more UKan--about feeling just primal basic emotions? How does this differ from other people, in a practical way?

    4. Thanks UKan
      That explains a lot!

    5. Does a Mal narc have shallow emotions?

    6. josé babbled...
      ha ha ha ha Pleasure a shallow emotion! only if pleasure is shallow, but in that case, it is not real pleasure, and if you don't really enjoy other people's pain, you aren't really cruel.

      pleasure is shallow, just like shallow is shallow, even real shallow.

    7. Pleasure is indeed shallow.

      Pleasure != joy

    8. I guess I must dedicate my life to shallow pursuits.

    9. No way! Your shit is so deep, though...

  6. Jose you don't understand psychology at all. You keep trying to redefine everything instead of understand it. That's not the way the world works. You learn the stuff people have already discovered first and then you add to it. Otherwise you are just calling a wheel a bike and the handlebars a balloon.

    Saying that psychopaths can't be cruel is just laughable. If psychopaths couldn't have shallow affect, impulsiveness, and be glib it wouldn't be listed among their traits in every single book about them. You're basically saying that every psychologist is wrong and you're the one who's right. The person with absolutely no schooling, training, or experience. The same person who didn't even know the difference between schizoid and schizophrenia. Your expecting people to go for this rubbish? Sorry mate, I'm not the juan.

    1. UKan, just a person I need, could you take a look above and express your opinion about my case? :)

    2. I don't make judgements off people's self reports. They are tedious, inaccurate, and boring. I like to figure people out by talking to them.

    3. What if I gave you my own self description and you could express your opinion about my case:

      God like ++

      Handsome ++

      Humble ++

      Trustworthy ++

      Brilliant ++

      Diplomatic ++

      Open Minded ++

      Kind ++

      Giving ++

    4. Definitely not shy, egocentric, having good self-esteem, changeble (you waste your time on me, but simply laugh from Jose), acting normal, person with well developed humor.

      God like -> trust yourself very much/charming, Handsome -> able to dress well and look after yourself, Humble -> don't need much attention, trustworhy -> interested in other people business, brilliant -> same as God like, diplomatic -> inteligent, smart, kind -> able to easily help others, giving -> same as kind.

      So you are a smart, inteligent, succesful, charismatic person.

      Got your point, it doesn't sound very sociopathic :)

    5. That's because it's all bollocks. I can tell you anything. That's the point.

    6. Maaaate. lol

  7. On topic, I think the reason men don't get women is exactly as you say it is: Projection.

    1. Is this why men find socio women so charming, too? I'd say it has to be a factor. A woman who relates, doesn't get emotional about pointless trivia, and can be talked to like just another one of the guys seems to be both non-threatening and desirable.

    2. And doesn't care about sex as much, so the guy can rest his dick and balls.

    3. right on, V. Then they get suspicious. They start to think you are just like a guy. - not to be trusted.

    4. ... and they would be right.

    5. You're a Tom Boy. Go to the Tomboy forum.

    6. Hi Anonymous!

      Tomboy forum 8:46?

    7. I was talking to anon 8:33. Yes there are a couple tomboy forums.

      I was always hanging with the boys, too. It wasn't only for sexual attention. I enjoyed their company better for the way their minds worked. But later I found a ton of women who weren't girly.

      You know what I find very interesting? A few of my "tomboy" girlfriends have been involved with/attracted to abusive, misogynistic men who didn't like their independence.


    Sociopaths don’t identify themselves so much with their gender? Is this serious? Sociopathy would be then a form of androgyny? A man deprived of the capacity to empathize with others is, just because of that (!), a better connoisseur of female emotions? This time ME is joking, I’m pretty sure. Imagining that you understand people better (either males or females) if you don’t understand their feelings, if you don’t care for their emotions is the best tip of wishful thinking I’ve read here so far.

    1. Not only wishful thinking, it is inconsistent, too.

    2. There are varying ways of understanding others' feelings. Some are subjective, some are empathetic, some are objective, some are practical. Who's to say which is the 'right' way to understand others; it's just that some ways are more useful than others.

    3. not identifying with gender doesn't necessarily make you androgynous.

  9. It's easy for women in general to charm men. Most guys are full blown suckers.

  10. Describe yourself physically or send me a pic. Which celebrity do you look like the most?

    1. <-- this guy, but I am younger, with brighter hair (different haircut right now) and I'm not sure if our eye colors match.

    2. Jose, do you read at all ? Instead of writing your fucking stupid opinions on the topic, pick up a book and read. Inthe last 100 years, a few have been published. A few from some guy names... Dick Hair... or something like that.

    3. I was ukan fuckers

  11. Replies
    1. dumb like a whale

    2. I'm not dumb!

    3. First step in getting better is admiting that you have problems, you dumbass.

  12. Ok, fine. I was touched as a child

    1. If it would be true, it would explain a lot about you. Too bad you're lying.

  13. Looks like all the socio's are busy at work, or being medicated.

    1. Or sleeping, like I'm about to do soon. Goodnight everybody!

  14. Does the Mal narc have shallow emotions, too?

    1. they feel deeply for themselves

    2. YES but are they the psychopath, as in the article on shallow emotions, which UKan linked. Did you read it, Zoe? It was a great explanation. I understood a guy I never could quite get, when I read that.

      But, how would the Mal Narc fit, in terms of that article. Read it, Zoe, if you would and tell me your take.

    3. i read it. my take...

      narcissists seem to feel the full range of emotions but they're off in how they apply them. they can come across as being completely looney tunes. they're always on.

      for narcs it's about maintaining image right? so they can seem normal until that's threatened. their buttons are easy to push.

    4. psychopaths... you'd have to spend time with them to see that something is off. narcissists are easier to spot.

      actions give a narcissist away, reactions (or lack of) a psychopath.

      my inexpert opinion.

    5. Narcissists have an obvious superficiality. They are always putting on a show.

    6. Thanks Zoe and UKan.

    7. You know, I just don't understand how the differences... all of them; between a narcissist and a sociopath, are not already abundantly clear, after being so well defined at SW, like... a million times over.

    8. Eden
      It is a continuum. Psychology makes it a demarcated category for their purposes of categorizing. It doesn't work that simply or clearly with actual people.

  15. How To Heal a PDJune 14, 2012 at 4:45 PM

    First of all, the PD is not your fault. You could not prevent it. I am sure you have tried to get rid of it, but have probably found that you KNEW more about it, but felt as shitty as ever. That is the nature of currently accepted techniques sanctioned by the Psychology/Psychiatric industries.

    So, if one departs from current methods, one finds oneself in uncharted waters.

    1. How To Heal a PDJune 14, 2012 at 4:50 PM

      The edifice of the PD is built up around trauma( I am not talking about the rare few who are born with PD's )

      The pain associated with childhood trauma is stored in the right side of the brain. Talk therapy deals with the left side of the brain. That is why you can talk to a therapist until you are blue in the face( 20 years) and never have your life change one iota. You can't plant an apple tree and have it produce oranges.

      The edifice of the trauma, stored in the RIGHT side of the brain, must be released. As it is, you can heal.

  16. Replies
    1. And.....................................................................................

    2. I only do true or false from now on.

    3. You're being a bit vague here.

    4. I just didn't have anything to say, but wanted to say something anyway. That's how it's done around here, is it? jose does it better than I ever could.

  17. On topic, I've never felt much connection to any one particular gender over another with regards to myself.

    1. I recently saw the proposed criteria for GID (gender identity something?) in the DSM 5 and I fit so much of it. I've never felt like my body doesn't match how I feel. I just don't really associate myself with my genitals.

    2. you must be androgynous

    3. ha i meant the above for Medusa!

    4. gender is an extension of who i am

    5. For me, gender is only relevant when choosing which restroom to use. But in clubs I will sometimes use the guys anyway because the queue is always shorter.

    6. It's called "Gender Dysphoria in Adolescents or Adults" in the proposed DSM-V.

      I don't fit the criteria at all.

      Zoe, lol. I have an androgynous mind. Physically, it varies, and/or it could be seen either way at the same time.

  18. "Me, I've always considered myself an abstract thinker, I don't see any big mystery behind women."

    Litte faggot-ass sociopath have nothing to be proud of, just are stupid retarded fuck-blades, who think they know something until they get knocked-out or shot like the fucking clowns they are.

    ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
    ..........''...\.......... _.·´


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