Sunday, April 17, 2016

Not sociopath, just smart?

From a reader:

Your blog has resonated with me for a while now. Despite not being a sociopath, getting an intuitive understanding of the illusion of free will can tend to make you more like one. Your recent post sort of illustrated the blind fact that was sitting in front of my face, why I, a fairly normal empathetic person, has no problem with manipulating people, especially if its benign.

When you see all of human desire, behavior and nature as a mechanism, even the most romanticized, idealized sensibilities start to become nothing more than  mechanisms.

At first, this might make someone depressed, as their idealistic illusions of meaning and purpose start to disintegrate. But, another thought can arise - that depression itself, that sense of emptiness, it's just a mechanism too.

Once you get there, you can start plugging into your instincts more rationally. Books like The Art of Seduction and 48 Laws of Power resonate with me. They wouldn't have in the past. My personality has become more Machiavellian, at least in the sense that I am much more keen on evaluating actions in terms of their consequences instead of ideals.


You sound like my friend. She sort of insists that I became the way I became because I was smart and so I naturally saw everything in terms of gears and levers to be manipulated to get what I wanted. I think it's because that's how she feels. She is probably currently in the depression state, because I think you're right, it's hard for meaning to exist at the same time that you are aware that everything can be reduced to simple mechanics. She has taken it a step further than just the belief that everything is simple mechanics, so it's even worse. Since she was a child, she's believed that she is *so* smart and *so* good at manipulating the gears and levers of people and the world that she fears that she controls everything, which because she's an empath, makes her constantly worry that she will mess everything up.

But when she says these things to me, I understand how different I am from her. Because it's not that seeing things in terms of gears and levers as a little kid made me a sociopath, it's being sociopathic made made me see the world in terms of gears and levers. So I never used to worry about things like meaning, because I never had it and then lost it. It was only after I tried to be less sociopathic that the question of meaning became a real issue for me.


  1. " it's hard for meaning to exist at the same time that you are aware that everything can be reduced to simple mechanics"

    The sparkling brilliance of the mechanistic view is that you realise the hunger for meaning is also mechanistic.

    It's the dopamine system latching onto something that aligns with our current beliefs about community, love, ambition etc.

    Think how easily we switch attention when our goals are achieved. Nihilism is nothing to be depressed about; it's yet another mechanism to harness for self-peace.

    1. This has been written by a random generator of words, right?

      Or an AI in training?

    2. Anonymous320 just does not get it. Not sure he is even trying to gaslight...

      "You realise the hunger for meaning is also mechanistic..."

      Absolutely. For instance, I truly wish I believed in god, any god, and that I had a strong guiding light outside of just myself. It would be so much easier. And perhaps more fulfilling even. But the intellect gets in the way.

      OK.. it sounds like I believe that I am smart and that I wish I was not. That is narcissism, is it not?

      Like a few of us on this site, I am stuck in between em and socio... path that is.

    3. "Absolutely. For instance, I truly wish I believed in god, any god, and that I had a strong guiding light outside of just myself. It would be so much easier. And perhaps more fulfilling even. But the intellect gets in the way."

      If you're serious, your time will come and you'll know without a doubt that God is real. Then it'll all make sense and you'll realize why it took that long.

    4. It's funny you mention peace - I've never thought of it that way before. In my own way, my life is now substantially more peaceful than it used to be.

      But it's not in the emotional way - it's like there's less tumult and I'm not jarred by things nearly as easily as I used to be.

    5. OldAndWise: when I learned to accept myself as I was, I grew into the awareness I had all I need. It feels very natural to let go now and trust my physical organism and my brain implicitly. While reading and exploring assisted, **-* was a good example of self-sufficiency. And ME in her book (somewhere anyway) speaks about the detailed and complete love psychopaths have for themselves. And lots more quotes from psychopaths - I particularly like "the present moment has all you need." That is so freaking powerful. Learning that style has created a very surprising degree of self sufficiency. Not complete, because we are a social species, but certainly enough.

      I initially felt very lost, and dark. Matthew Arnold's Dover Beach expressed the barrenness. But evidence overwhelms me: the universe is so rich, and I can receive and experience more of it each day.

      So I don't miss God. There's no emptiness.

      It is interesting to ponder ourselves as what Vegas terms 'hybrids'. I had read some of your posts from before I first landed here but haven't read Mach. I also very much enjoyed Mr Hyde and Radical Agnostic, and several Anons. In my case, the hybrid nature has shifted from a sharp, fighting narcissistic stance to something more cerebral. Emotionally, the taut spring has released; there was an acute moment, but I find every day brings more relief and more natural confidence. I let go of controlling behaviours and this makes it easier for me to detect controlling behaviours in others (still tons to learn). But cerebrally, I feel I can operate at a lower level; more intuitive, more in connection with my basic needs, basic drivers, my instincts and my feelings. And operating more naturally at a subcortically level makes space for a tracing of the Matrix code, as a metaphor, an identification of patterns with far less effort. Anon 9:56 this is what I mean by peace; that I feel closer to my current temporal, physical existence and simply understand my impulses to regard my sustenance in the most holistic sense.

      And I also enjoy the reduction in turbulence!! Although it is difficult to let go completely ;) I don't know if I ever will, I'm sure I will retain some of my own impulsive streak.

      Are you enjoying the peace? The difference?

      OldAndWise what are the significant markers in your journey? Where do you see yourself heading?

    6. "I particularly like "the present moment has all you need." That is so freaking powerful."

      It's obvious to anyone with an ounce of intellect that "being in the moment" always frees you from the stress and responsibilities of life. It is also obvious that it is a delusion and a shortsightedness that only the least genuinely intelligent people aim for. Of course when they do sell out for temporary, immediate gains, they have to continue feeding their delusion to themselves.

    7. Jonaid,

      I invite you to share some of your experiences. What works in your experience?

    8. Patience and honesty. In the long run it yields the absolute best and lasting results. Everything else is temporal and fleeting and settling for less. I understand intense emotional pain, feeling betrayed and overwhelmed. I understand the intense longing for someone and the fear of rejection. To this day there are times when my heart yearns for someone. I've been 100% honest with them (I did lie a little, very little, about trivial stuff when I was with them but I admitted most of it afterwards) and have endured more pain as a result. I go out of my way to find excuses for them - something about them just keeps telling me that it's a beautiful, lost soul stuck deep inside. They don't mean any of this, they too are hurt and lost. Then there is that fear of being used and manipulated and treated like a nobody. That was why I was more reserved and, at times, perhaps a bit sociopathic. I always felt my actions revealed the true me and my emotional reservations would be understood as a personality flaw. Now I think I gave the wrong impression at times because of my own insecurities and fears, which I didn't think I still had, until I met them.

      My apologies if I said something which genuinely hurt. I just find it repulsive to deliberately mislead and confuse people and I see you doing that often. You sound like an intelligent person who's gone / going thru a terrible heartbreak. Only the best of peoples are patient enough when it gets that tough, don't break, don't lose themselves and cause others to lose themselves. It's not easy - you know my story and how I almost went down myself. I can tell you without a shred of doubt that it is worth it if you don't go down the road of sociopathy.

      It is easy said than done, North. Patience and honesty in this world is VERY hard but when it's all over you walk straight and have genuine pride in yourself. I don't fear anyone or anything except God. I don't think twice about what I have to say - it may be wrong but I've got nothing to hide. I am almost always blunt (except when I'm being sarcastically humorous) because I don't feel like a hypocrite. I swear I'm not saying any of this to boast - I'm just attempting to describe the freedom and liberation one feels inside when they are genuine with the world.

      All you people here - especially the sociopaths - have the potential to be amongst the best of humanity or the worst. That's not something the vast of majority of people ever get to consider. Why make the wrong choice?

      Hope I didn't lose you in all that.

    9. Jonaid! My man, always a privilege to hear the religious judge the hypocrites with rationality. Although, if religious people were capable of rational thought there wouldn't be any. You've done me a service sir and I thank you for blocking half the page with your posts.

    10. The vast majority of psychopaths are "religious" on the face of it simply because the vast majority of human beings are, at least outwardly, "religious." Labels are unimportant, beliefs and actions are what really matter.

      Look over my - now 5 - posts if they're blocking you.

    11. Thank you Jonaid. I find you very relatable when you talk about your own experience.

      You and I have very different worldviews. I am not acting disingenuously here simply for that reason. In fact, I am not lying at all. I lack capacity in this regard, my brain fails to comprehend it readily as a strategy. We simply look through a completely different lens.

      I agree that patience is the key. Patience, fairness, respect and taking responsibility fully and only for one's self have emerged as the operating principles that work best for me. I see greatest possibility for growth and goodness through them.

      Thanks again for sharing your story.

    12. You're welcome. In the end, there is Someone who knows what each and every one of us intends.

      In the name of God, The Merciful, The Compassionate.

      "Surely for those who fear their Lord in secret, theirs will be forgiveness and a great reward.

      And keep your opinion secret or proclaim it, indeed He is Knower of all that is in the breasts (of people).

      Should He not know what He created? And He is the Subtile, the Aware.

      He it is Who has made the earth subservient unto you, so walk in the paths thereof and eat of His providence. And unto Him will be the resurrection (of the dead)."

      Qur'an 67: 12-15

    13. If Allah is smart, as you must believe that he is, would he advise you to directly speak to people who are completely different?

      Try putting yourself in their minds for a while if you really want to bring them to your side.

    14. "Allah" is just Arabic for God.

      I do empathize as best as I can with sociopaths. That's why I'm here. Still, I'm sure I'm far from perfect and am all ears if you have any genuine suggestions to offer.

    15. The one thing I can think of which I think would help sociopaths is that they need to "come out" with their baggage and empty their slate. God forgives everything (I mean everything) and anyone who truly believes and trusts in Him would do the same. Please don't read this as judging - far from it. It's just impossible for a person to be free if they've got past wrong-doings that remain unaddressed. That's why repentance exists.

  2. The best manipulators, mathematicians, statisticians are aware that nothing is fixed. There are factors constantly being thrown your way. I have always kept this in mind. Control to me is merely a way to respond.

    1. "Control to me is merely a way to respond."

      Because it's either control, or be controlled, most of the time.

      There is a middle path, where there's mutual agreement between multiple parties.
      Very rare though, in practice. Unfortunately.

    2. I can only truly control the way I respond. I have no interest in controlling anyone else.

    3. That would probably change if/when you have children. Or would you let them play on a busy road?

    4. You teach children. Not control them

    5. You might want to read Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High Anon 2:32

    6. What about when they're very low?

  3. "When you see all of human desire, behavior and nature as a mechanism, even the most romanticized, idealized sensibilities start to become nothing more than mechanisms."

    I used to believe this when I was an atheist but I was not a sociopath. I did not, however, lie to myself or to others and pretend that "nihilism" is "yet another mechanism to harness for self-peace" or "...mathematicians, statisticians are aware that nothing is fixed." The latter statement is especially devoid of any understanding of the Universe (which is EVERYTHING small and big). Everything IS fixed - it's so utterly and precisely "fixed." The odds of you breathing and reading my post are so infinitesimally small yet the Universe and all it's properties are so perfectly fixed that here you are reading it.

    Those who reduce everything to "mechanism" are basically saying that everything is random except that which you mold to your will. There's two points here: 1) everything is random, from the Big Bang to your existence, 2) therefore one can do as one pleases.

    I have to say this: if North thinks everything can be "harnessed for self-peace" than why don't you quit whining about your past love affairs and mold them into something serene. Repeating cleverly articulated nonsense and screwing other people's minds is really beyond disgusting. Just because you're not always called out on your contradictions and lies does not mean no one notices them.

    I hope you all come to your senses and get out of this jungle of confusion.

  4. "My personality has become more Machiavellian, at least in the sense that I am much more keen on evaluating actions in terms of their consequences instead of ideals."

    Think what a difference this would make if all 'empaths' thought like this. If everyone thought through the long-term consequences of their actions!

    The mind boggles.

    Everyone would probably live in a place resembling Holland. But better.

    Nope. Too ridiculous.

    this poster has it right, but about the world in general:

    "I hope you all come to your senses and get out of this jungle of confusion."

  5. "So I never used to worry about things like meaning, because I never had it and then lost it."

    A lot of people seem to need 'meaning' in their lives, but don't seem to have the ability to formulate their own meaning and then be secure about that.

    @ M E:
    "It was only after I tried to be less sociopathic that the question of meaning became a real issue for me."

    How can you become less sociopathic? I understand 'less physically unfit, less greedy' etc. but 'less neurologically different'!!?

    Does this statement actually mean 'less uncaring' and 'less controlling' around others? Are you suggesting that all sociopaths are by nature invariably uncaring [about others] and insatiably controlling; 'cause that seems a bit of a generalisation. In terms of daily effort if nothing else. If that's what you spent most of *your* time doing - no wonder you needed a therapist by your mid/late?-thirties! (I know that sound rude, but, really].

    What about 'heroic'-style political figures that have those traits? They might have very low 'Warmth', be high in 'dis-allegiance' towards most groups within their society, but may well still ethically 'care', in a cognitive way. And intend 'well'. After all, why not?

    It's a rational choice like any other.

    Arguably, becoming much more psychopathic [ie. very self-aware about it] is exactly when the question of meaning and purpose become much more obvious. 'Meaning' in the socratic and evolutionary adaptive sense, that is.

    [I realise that sounds pompous and portentious. Couldn't phrase it any more briefly.]


  6. ME, thank you for tweeting something of mine. From 2 years ago this time. I almost did not recognized it but it sounded too familiar. I had to do a search on the blog.

    Anyway, I went back to the original post and that made me realize how much more I understand compared to a couple of years ago. And how so very strange it is to get into a the brain of a sociopath. A parallel world, really. But it is now almost normal to me.

    You had Mach. Then me. Then north. The empaths who can learn to understand sociopaths without completely freaking out.

    We can get to the point where sociopathy is as normal as homosexuality. Give it a few more years and a good movie like Philadelphia. It will happen and you started it.

    1. I read the SW archives a lot. By coincidence, I'm reading June/July 2014 at present. Some great stuff in there.
      So I'm going to use Dev's comment as a starting point. Her posts always make excellent sense to me:

      'Dev August 6, 2014 at 2:37 AM

      "My grandiose sense of self worth means that I don't give a fuck if you invited me to participate in your conversation or not."'

      So, with that in mind:

      "The empaths who can learn to understand sociopaths without completely freaking out."

      There was a period in recent times, before being gay was OK and mainstream, that a phenomenon existed of some straight women who hung around gay men, and were termed 'fag hags'. A very derisive and unpleasant term, I agree.

      However, point being. That group of women did nothing to make homosexuality acceptable to the general public. At all.

      What unarguably did change things, almost certainly, was gay people themselves coming out in greater and greater numbers, from all walks of life, and saying 'look at me; I'm pretty normal except for who I have sex with'. And a few successful anti-discrimination lawsuits didn't go amiss either.

      Same with Autism Spectrum Disorder, actually. It's when they started standing up for themselves at conferences *about* them, that people's perceptions had to change about the coping and life skills of people with ASD.

      So, James Fallon comes to mind at this point. No-one else is exactly volunteering to 'come out', face, name and all, currently. Therefore, the only example of 'psychopaths at play', is this blog, more or less. Going back to the homosexuality analogy, gay bars were *gay* bars. You could go in if straight, but not stay if you were either insulting to gays or started trying to hand out health and safety or religious pamphlets. Or the gay customers voted with their feet.
      In fact every oppressed minority starts off by demanding its own space to work things out.

      "Give it a few more years and a good movie like Philadelphia. It will happen and you started it."

      There are already many good TV series and movies featuring people with psychopathic traits; good, bad and funny [not too many sad psychopaths though].
      So, in terms of 'starting' something: what? And what about the next part; carrying on?
      Will a blog predominantly consisting of NT's talking mainly about their own 'stuff', continue to carry on being seen as relevant, or useful? To anyone?

      This blog is a very valuable resource, but honestly only the stuff written by past actual psychopaths is valid in terms of understanding them. [Certainly, bouncing off NT's is useful as starting points.]

      And the humour (especially regarding Parsnips. Then there's Dr. Ginger's swinging baby joke). It's like finding little gold nuggets in a very muddy river.

      "You had Mach. Then me. Then north."

      I'd suggest Dr. Ginger did more to advance discussion than all three of you combined, to be honest.

      Now, if it's really almost normal to you to get into the brain of a psychopath, all the above will be received in a spirit akin to the tone of the conversations between Bob and Dr. Ginger during the months of 2014 mentioned.


    2. XK,

      I invite you to conceive that we are capable of reading your posts for what they are worth. I notice you apologise even when addressing M.E.

      I've said many times I enjoy your posts; do you believe I'm disingenuous? I'm not. I read the first two stanzas of your comment at 4:48, immediately appreciating it and recognising your voice.

      We do have a genuine interest in the psychopathy and have invested a great deal in understanding it. This has been largely due to necessity; in my case dealing with something so far beyond previous conception and so high in pitch it has taken 24 months to make sufficient space for it. But there are endless avenues to explore through the contrast presented by the psychopathic mode of operation that as yet are mere breadcrumbs.

      I enjoy your voice: i really think my history here provides sufficient credentials for the truly exploratory nature of my interest. I want to hear what you have say.

      That doesn't mean I accept what you say. When I initially challenged you, I thought your robust style was indication you could handle my 'robustness'. It's a mistake I have made with males in the past - and I'm learning from that. I already apologised so don't expect anything further in that regard.

      All I am saying is constructive dialogue is my primary interest here; that some of it occurs regarding my emotional journey need not concern you. There are neurotypicals here that benefit from each other; and primarily because we are the few who are genuinely curious and seek to understand fully rather than writing people off as evil monsters or using some other shortcut. I'm not asking you to be nice to us; rather view to view my posts objectively just as I regard yours. Challenge them on their merits by all means.

    3. As regards awareness, I think there are big roles for both neurotypicals and psychopaths/sociopaths to play.

      On the neurotypical side: consider there are endless sites for victims out there, many of which demonise. I'm not saying they all do. I am saying there is a tide of narrative that should be challenged because it's accuracy is insufficient - and in my case unhelpful after a point. This is one reason I like to engage and ask questions and many people have been helpful: VN most recently; A has been fantastic; ESTP Sociopath; Nihilistic Mind; Faust, Once and a bunch of others. I really enjoy ThePsychopathInside's blog too for the candour and everyday perspectives - it's very rich and interesting. These conversations allow us to create more rounded views of what the condition implies and how it plays out in lived experience.

      And I absolutely agree that psychopaths / sociopaths must take the lead on it. And this is another reason I like to challenge: it's NOT a one way street. Psychopaths / sociopaths have many misconceptions about neurotypicals too. Your achieving a more rounded perspective helps both your cause and mine. Right, so yeah, I need to be more respectful in the way I do it and that's fine. I am breaking my old habits: argument and escalation were the patterns I developed with my father, but being here doesn't give me the right to indulge; rather the perfect opportunity to walk away from them.

      My personal thrill is to use psychopathy to challenge the general assumptions we have typically made about the human condition. It's tangential to this discussion and something I prefer to pursue in other avenues but I observe and synthesise here. I don't need you to agree with or endorse my project; but gladly accept insights your voice provides. And believe me I do wish to operate in a fair and respectful way. I don't want to diminish others. That's not my path.

    4. You must think everyone was born yesterday if you think we all don't know you're a psychopath. Stop pretending otherwise.

    5. This is a prime example of the wall that exists between socios and nons. I was accused of pretending in my relationship and I'm sure north experienced that as well. But I wasn't pretending. I didn't know they were pretending either. That is precisely the point. Nons don't spend time pretending. We think it's the most bizarre concept. I can see now how this would be hard for a sociopath to believe but think about your game. Think about how you win your game. Its not because both parties are aware they are playing. I can assure you of that.

    6. Spot on, Anon 12:30.

      This is why I hypothesise that "empathy" is really projecting our own experience. Sociopaths DO project their own motives and experience; it's how you understand each other. With side effects such as the above.

      Neurotypicals also project their own experience, as ME's tweeted "Empath Mistake..." implies. We don't operate the way you do which is precisely why you can blindside us until we learn. It's not about us being "stupid"; it's that it is beyond our wiring and not yet extant in our conception.

      There's no having cake and eating it.

    7. * I do think there's more to "empathy" than what I've described, but I do think projection of one's own experience is a part of the mechanism.

    8. North, re your comments:

      I appreciate your posts to me. It was succinct, ordered and I got your drift. Unfortunately my response is going to be too long, which I usually try to avoid. Sigh.

      "I read the first two stanzas of your comment at 4:48, immediately appreciating it and recognising your voice."

      I know it's recognisable. 8-) No need to sign, often, when time is short.

      "I thought your robust style was indication you could handle my 'robustness'. It's a mistake I have made with males in the past"

      I do NOT [- believe this, for pity's sake] *under any definition whatsoever*, think you have a 'robust style'. I have acquired an impression that you just plainly do not read things thoroughly, unless someone spends much time explaining the minutiae of their thinking. I don't have time or inclination for that.

      [pause for humorous thought to self:

      Lightbulb moment: I've got it! North's actually a 'plant', to kill off anybody dubious daring to post into here. By strangling them with verbiage. It's a slow, horrible, excruciating death...... Eeeek!......
      [gurgling noise]

      8-) End of humorous thought to self.]

      [Yes Anon@11.55am - this is me MAKING FUN OF MYSELF, not North]

      And I really don't care if I'm embarrassing myself. I make fun of myself a LOT. Try it. You might like it.

      The problem is you have too many preconceptions and a somewhat odd choice of wording, for me to want to spend much time on and determine the meaning. I admit I do think you say some silly stuff, and you should have gone to a good therapist instead of trying to sort things out for yourself here.

      Unless you are indeed as narcissistic as you are starting to appear.

      "I absolutely agree that psychopaths / sociopaths must take the lead on it."

      So, leading: be quiet more often, for longer, and *listen*. When commenting, leave out the existential jargon. It's too vague and open to misinterpretation for someone who doesn't have your mindset, is all. And never assume you know the emotional state of someone on line, from how they write stuff - esp. if they have a different personality style from you. Or even a different culture, come to that.

      "Your achieving a more rounded perspective helps both your cause and mine."

      Professionally trained psychologists help people get a 'rounded perspective'. For goodness sake. Are you serious? I probably wouldn't take the advice of any NT female here on how to cross the road, let alone anything else. I repeat: there are extremely expensive psychologists that help with that sort of 'rounding'. Mine are excellent.
      [Another humorous thought: although they are acquiring a somewhat haunted look nowadays.....LOL. But it has to be said; *they* really enjoy my sense of humour.]

      I came here to chat with other people similar to me. And when I do, as you've noticed, I'm very polite. I don't intentionally [unless that's how they start to play it] antagonise people for fun but I am very blunt, and I apologise first just in case. Not out of fear, [rolling eyes] but manners. So unintended misinterpretation of intent is less likely.

      You do assume I should want to interact with you, but - what would be my motive? You take things sooo seriously. Are you white American? They're not very good with sarcastic humour, I know that.

      I must have missed the SW Rulebook disclaimer form. I've certainly never signed on to be a translator between human variants. Or to indulge in metaphysical nonsense.

      Now I am annoyed. 8-) 8-)
      But maybe not. LOL

      Do I have to sign this? I suspect not?

    9. Different objectives are natural and appreciated.

      The cross-purposes and personal expressions here lack the confection of many other forums of human communication and I appreciate that. A mixing pot that never coalesces, with all sorts of flavours bubbling through.

    10. I should say never completely coalesces. Those conversations that do carry mutually are the most pleasurable.

    11. "Unless you are indeed as narcissistic as you are starting to appear."

      Starting to appear?

    12. I was trying politeness on for size. It doesn't fit.

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    19. North people on this site appreciate your kindness and fairness-your willingness to listen and consider different views. That is a powerful thing. But you also aren't a doormat. Most people respect that. Some people are threatened by that.

    20. This discussion is beyond fascinating to me. I don't have time to delve into all of it (Because last week or the last semester of grad school and I'm drowning in thesis writing).

      But I agree that psychopathy/sociopathy is becoming more normalized. I'm a big supporter of having the discussions about things. In my everyday life I am very vocal about things like my sexual assaults, religion, sexuality, and abortion because I think it needs to be talked about and I am ok talking about these things. I don't opening talk about my psychopathy because I'm not ready to commit career suicide, but that's why I have a blog (BTW, thanks North for the complement on the blog). The movement needs to come from psychopathys and sociopaths, but there also needs to be an inkling of hope to come from the other side that I'm not going to ruin myself on some crusade. I think its coming along though. In the past year I have over doubled the amount of people in my personal life who know. And of course started a blog to continue the outreach.

      I won't get into the rest of my thoughts because I should be writing

  7. Quote of the Day:

    “All that glisters is not gold;
    Often have you heard that told:
    Many a man his life has sold
    But my outside to behold:
    Gilded tombs do worms enfold
    Had you been as wise as bold,
    Your in limbs, in judgment old,
    Your answer had not been in'scroll'd
    Fare you well: your suit is cold.' Cold, indeed, and labour lost: Then, farewell, heat and welcome, frost!”

    ― William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice


    1. I like that poem. Shakespeare is a master observing human behavior, tho I never bothered to read the original texts.

      I guess I'll have to look it up now. xD

      PS - How's it goin'?

    2. I like your quotes too, Vegas.

    3. Hey NM!!!

      I like that poem, too.:) I heard the 1st line today, which made me look it up, and I decided to share.:)

      Shakespeare is a master at observing human behavior, although I also have not read the original texts.

      NM-I think we are telepathically linked!!! I was just thinking of you today, before you posted-you have been missed.:)

      I like the "PS".:) I am doing well-thanks for asking!!!

      How are you???

      I love seeing your dog, too.:)


    4. Hey North-

      I am glad you like the quotes, too.:)

      I also enjoy reading your posts.:)


    5. NM-

      PS-Did you ever watch "True Romance"???


  8. XK, you must be really proud. Going around copying and pasting other peoples posts and correcting like a teacher. How do you do that !!? What a smart person you must be. Uncovering the truth, never failing to prove us once again how intelligent and observant you are. Must be great fun, to be honest. How much time have you spended on this site? I bet lots. (I know that I sound sarcastic. I realize it sounds like I don't mean this stuff, but really...couldn't phrase it any more briefly). Hope to hear more from you soon.

    1. It doesn't sound sarcastic, it sounds desperate [LOL] - to antagonise.

      I was a teacher. 8-)
      And yes I am smart.
      And yes I uncover the truth, and then speak it plainly.
      And yes, I am very proud; of all of the above.
      Especially of the mammoth effort of reading past people's posts, to help gain understanding for myself. [That's me making fun of my overly-thorough self BTW]

      As I read very fast, and scroll down even faster, I don't spend very much time on this site.

      Which bits of yourself are you proud of, BTW?

      Your attempted jibes? 8-)


    2. No xk. It is sarcastic and meant to get a rise out of you. Which it did.
      You remind me of a cross between Smarties and Bite me. Do your home work and you will know what I mean.

      I am thinking smartie more than BM...

    3. Btw. Dr ginger was great. And at the time I was afraid to get into her threads. She got self identified sociopaths to open up. Tii in particular iirc.

      She was not an empath though. She was a self diagnosed cluster B. Borderline. She is also a psychologist. A gem in my mind. I miss her.

    4. God I need some popcorn

    5. "It is sarcastic and meant to get a rise out of you.

      I know. I was sarcastic back [is that not acceptable?] Thank you for the help though. Appreciated.

      "Which it did."

      Is that bad? Have I 'lost'? Won? Am I supposed to be 'above that sort of thing'? LOL. Why? What if I *want* to play tennis? Can't I? What if I like playing?

      "Do your home work and you will know what I mean."

      LOL Another one quick with her Patronisation Mode. Clones. Shit. French Clone and USA Clone.
      The 'Let It all Hang Out Sisters'.

      OK. I'll stop now. Tell me the truth now, ye from Europe. Was that [above paragraph] in any way amusing to you? No? Yes? If not: I WILL stop. Deal?

      And it's not 'homework', nitwit. I really enjoy reading the archives. Much less noise, much more signal.

      Yes, I wish Tii, Dev, Bob and Dr. Ginger were available to read here again. Most of all, Ukan/Lykan. His humour is brilliant 8-(

      What happened to Tii and Dev? Why did they leave? Was all OK?

      "She is also a psychologist."

      Indeed. Her jokes post was so funny I teared up. She came to learn. And didn't patronise or take offense. That's why they 'opened up'.

      [Nor did she ever try to cut people down to size that she though were getting above themselves. 8-)]

      But *you're* French though, right? Nuff said. 8-)

      Borderlines have affective empathy. Lots. P/T. The other time: Rage Inc.
      They're very good practice for keeping one's cool. All angry people should Adopt a Borderline as their anti-rage therapy.
      Then you'd kill two birds with one stone. LOL


    6. ^ adopt some adhd meds, yes! :D

  9. I'm not a psychopath in fact I'm the opposite im a very honor driven person. A psychopath places their highest values on logic and a smug satisfaction of their own intelligence but life is empty if you live that way. Today I cut through a park on the way home from the gym and 7 gopniksin their 20s where binge drinking there and when I passed by the weakest of the litter start insulting me for no reason. If I were a psychopath I would have walked away or tried to act friendly but I'm not and I have honor to defend. I walked back and said "There's around 7 of you and I'm on my own your a woman, I've been boxing all day while you've been sitting here doing nothing. Walk over to me woman" As I suspected the effeminate coward did nothing and I defended my honor.

    1. The greatest human traits are honor and dignity. Why do you think the world is so messed up these days with sluts and degenerates rising to the top? Because people are lacking these magnificent qualities of honor and dignity. The fall of the church and of classical patriarchal traditions has made man a wolf to his fellow man. Thus people have become soulless husks who know the price of everything but the value of nothing.

    2. Adam if I could kiss you I would you are a real man and magnificent genius

  10. Adam I'd love to meet you. You sound like my type of man. I'm in the United Kingdom, I hope you are too. Just to meet you face to face would be spot on.

    1. Sounds good but first you must tell me more about yourself. If you're a woman then im afraid you're unlucky because im not interested. Im looking for a man with similar interests as me to be my friend. Im attracted to women but i much prefer being around other men not in a gay way but a strong bromance. I have nothing in common with women, i think for men to be able to relate to women they need some femininity within themselves and im 100% masculine.

    2. Women irl are afraid of me they think im an alien or a cyborg

    3. I'm from Sutton area? And you?

    4. In your above comment you expressed that your attracted to women. What is it about them that you admire?

    5. Adam.

      Likert scales aside, I say this as your not quite friend, [and possibly even a future candidate as your bromancee].

      I implore you to consider this woman's invitation to visit Sutton seriously. Obviously, she has thrown all caution to the winds, bared her breast, and wishes to settle down and marry you. She's obviously just too shy to ask you directly.

      Have you any idea as to the cosmopolitan nature of Sutton? The cafe culture? The nightlife? No? [Probably best.] But Sutton is definitely ready to embrace you to its bosom, as you will embrace Violet to yours. Truly.

      You both seem well matched. A Shy Shrinking Violet, and you, a Man Of No Pretense. You are destined Luke [ahem no that's another movie] for each other.

      I can see it now. Moonlight. Sutton. Adam. Violet. A warm breeze. A village look and feel. The prosperous suburbs. Music floating on that breeze.
      Future infinite bliss and joy.

      If I were you I'd snap Violet up sight unseen. Such luck comes to any man but once in a lifetime. [Well maybe twice]...[hmm could even be three times].
      Still, what do you have to lose but that virginity of yours? Huh? So, do you feel lucky, p....[drat. that's another movie].

      Enough prevaricating Adam. Get to it. You know what any honorable man would do. Buy that ring!

      Your [almost] friend,

    6. PS. Of course it could be Sutton Coldfield. In which case: run for your life.

  11. I think women need to know what your about and your motives etc its why men always put on a performance around women. "Oh look at me hopping around on one leg i cant possibly be boring like that man at the table who sits their and is just himself" I dont do that. My strong sense of honor disallows me from engaging in any type of fakery or pretense. When one is innocent and not pretending one is honorable.

    1. "A psychopath places their highest values on logic and a smug satisfaction of their own intelligence"

      Completely True

      "My strong sense of honor disallows me from engaging in any type of fakery or pretense."

      Mostly True. LOL

      "I think women need to know what your about and your motives etc its why men always put on a performance around women."

      Neither True nor Untrue

      "The fall of the church and of classical patriarchal traditions has made man a wolf to his fellow man."

      Mostly Untrue

      "I've been boxing all day while you've been sitting here doing nothing. Walk over to me woman" As I suspected the effeminate coward did nothing and I defended my honor."

      Completely untrue 8-)

      Love those Likert scales.

  12. That site is kinda dumb, I'd be ashamed myself to link it! Stop asking her, it won't make her do it, you look pathetic now.

  13. That awful site is stacked to the brim with degenerates. We have high standards here. No creeps allowed.

  14. Materialism is likely false; free will likely exists.

  15. My husband broke up with me last week, i was so frustrated and i could not know what next to do again, i love my husband so much but he was cheating on me with another woman and this makes him broke up with me so that he can be able to get marry to the other lady and this lady i think use witchcraft on my husband to make him hate me and my kids and this was so critical and uncalled-for,I cry all day and night for God to send me a helper to get back my man until i went to NY to see a friend and who was having the same problem with me but she latter got her Husband back and i asked her how she was able to get her husband back and she told me that their was a powerful spell caster in Africa name Dr.Unity that he help with love spell in getting back lost lover back and i decided to contacted the same Dr.Unity and he told me what is needed to be done for me to have my man back and i did it although i doubted it but i did it and the Dr told me that i will get the result after 48hours, and he told me that my husband was going to call me by 9pm in my time and i still doubted his word, to my surprise my husband really called me and told me that he miss me so much, Oh My God i was so happy, and today i am happy with my man again and we are joyfully living together as one good family and i thank the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity of , he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that good spell casters still exist and Dr.Unity is one of the good spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are there and your lover is turning you down, or you have your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore contact the powerful spell caster Dr.Unity on his email: .if you have any problem contact Dr.Unity, i give you 100% guarantee that he will help you. Thank you sooooo much!!!

    1. Getting your ex lover back
    2. Lottery spell
    3. Get a job spell
    4. HIV/aids spell
    5. Pregnancy spell


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