Wednesday, August 17, 2011

New sociopath (part 2)

My response:
I find that most sociopaths are not sad at the thought that they might be one. You could also be BPD, but you might just be a young teenage socio girl in a sorority living in the narcissistic generation that you belong to. Does criticism hurt your feelings?

If you are a socio, learn to use your drives for power to help you keep self control. For instance, it bothers you when you weird people out because you lose power over those people, right? So let the part of you that craves power lead you to a better choice, e.g. keep people wanting more by being less available. Read the Art of Seduction and 48 Rules of Power.
The reader:
I don't know if I could be BPD, however, I do play different...personas? with different people. Being in a sorority has nothing to do with anything though, as I just recently joined one. I just think I'm a socio because I manipulate people instinctively.
Since I sent this email I've been really analyzing my present behavior. I realized how much I watch other people's faces, trying to see if their feelings are sincere or just being fascinated by the way they react to things. I sometimes even try to replicate their faces. People always give me strange looks when someone is crying because I ask why or become irritated by it. I hate being criticized, mostly because I don't think other people deserve to judge me and because I see their flaws clearly and accept them, so why can't they do that for me? It seems unfair.
I always feel extremely powerful when people pay attention to me or treat me in a special way. For example, the boy I'm dating now sees me as his only confidante and that's why I like him, even when his depression gets irritating because he harps on how he wants to kill himself. I always pretend to them that they're special to me and that they're the only ones I can come to for certain things and that I really appreciate them. Another thing is that I've lived apart from my family for my entire life and people ask me if I miss them and I say yes, because it's what is expected. I find questions like do you miss them or who's your hero or things of that nature stupid. I don't miss anyone, I miss the things they could be doing for me or the entertainment they could be providing, as I'm constantly bored.

I make mistakes in my reactions to things sometimes. My girlfriend (I'm "bisexual") cheated on me and I was more concerned about whether I looked stupid or not in front of her friends instead of the fact that she "betrayed" me. I didn't really care and I was only dating her because I liked the attention we got or the reactions I got when I told people I was dating a girl.

125 comments:

  1. *Fears embarrassment
    *Infrequent illicit activities
    *Needs constant attention
    *Needs to validate self-image
    *Was praised as a child repeatedly
    *Extremely defensive


    That should answer your question.

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  2. 'even when his depression gets irritating because he harps on how he wants to kill himself.'

    oooooo look how sociopathic you are, lol. shut up, pathetic, needy little bitch.

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  3. I didn't really care and I was only dating her because I liked the attention we got or the reactions I got when I told people I was dating a girl.

    There are many ways to elicit attention and reaction, some of which you might even enjoy. What this speaks to is extraordinary neediness.

    You also speak about living apart from your family. Was there anything in your circumstances that might spark an attachment disorder?

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  4. Reactive Attachment Disorder, all grown up.

    Children with attachment disorders or other attachment problems have difficulty connecting to others and managing their own emotions. This results in a lack of trust and self-worth, a fear of getting close to anyone, anger, and a need to be in control. A child with an attachment disorder feels unsafe and alone.

    Attachment disorders are the result of negative experiences in this early relationships. If young children feel repeatedly abandoned, isolated, powerless, or uncared for—for whatever reason—they will learn that they can’t depend on others and the world is a dangerous and frightening place

    An aversion to touch and physical affection. Children with reactive attachment disorder often flinch, laugh, or even say “Ouch” when touched. Rather than producing positive feelings, touch and affection are perceived as a threat.

    Control issues. Most children with reactive attachment disorder go to great lengths to prevent feeling helpless and remain in control. They are often disobedient, defiant, and argumentative.

    Anger problems. Anger may be expressed directly, in tantrums or acting out, or through manipulative, passive-aggressive behavior. Children with reactive attachment disorder may hide their anger in socially acceptable actions, like giving a high five that hurts or hugging someone too hard.

    Difficulty showing genuine care and affection. For example, children with reactive attachment disorder may act inappropriately affectionate with strangers while displaying little or no affection towards their parents.

    An underdeveloped conscience. Children with reactive attachment disorder may act like they don’t have a conscience and fail to show guilt, regret, or remorse after behaving badly.

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  5. WOW! What a RAD post.

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  6. incredibly lame punAugust 17, 2011 at 3:29 AM

    'WOW! What a RAD post.'

    *facepalm... then laughs anyway*

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  7. Children with attachment disorders or other attachment problems have difficulty connecting to others and managing their own emotions. This results in a lack of trust and self-worth, a fear of getting close to anyone, anger, and a need to be in control. A child with an attachment disorder feels unsafe and alone.

    BPD ?

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  8. I always feel extremely powerful when people pay attention to me or treat me in a special way.


    Ah fuck, not another attention whore.

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  9. another thing I have a problem with is attention. I literally can't control myself, especially when drunk or on MDMA, from seeking attention or approval.
    I constantly message people on facebook, sometimes who consider me a friend, sometimes those who consider me a distant friend, sometimes people I want to sleep with...I can't help it and I get so angry when they don't answer or stop answering or I just weird them out.


    I always feel extremely powerful when people pay attention to me or treat me in a special way. For example, the boy I'm dating now sees me as his only confidante and that's why I like him, even when his depression gets irritating because he harps on how he wants to kill himself. I always pretend to them that they're special to me and that they're the only ones I can come to for certain things and that I really appreciate them.

    And now you are getting ATTENTION on a blog.
    I'm sure you will appreciate any response. lol

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  10. Erectial DysfunctionAugust 17, 2011 at 5:21 AM

    Damn it.

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  11. Shit! i ment Erectile. lol

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  12. Am I having fun yetAugust 17, 2011 at 5:26 AM

    No, I is bored.

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  13. WAKE UP GEOFF!

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  14. Did you know: Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is our longest word.

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  16. @nikita

    what is it?

    @erin

    what are you hoping for, some kind of power transfer?

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  19. Yesterday they were evil turds and now they are role models.

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  20. 'Ukan and Mis are my role models'

    oh dear...

    @nikita

    come oooooon

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  21. Would they want to be her role models?

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  23. Anon

    I was just trying to get some attention.

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  24. Well that's not exactly a role model then.

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  26. Not to take up too much room but...

    When someone prefaces a comment with a phrase such as this (or any "not/but" statement), you know exactly what's going to happen next.

    You are one self-involved lady, Erin. Do you even read the comments that are already here before you post? You're only engaged here when the subject is you, and you only reply to comments about you.

    You might actually learn something that you wouldn't otherwise if you stop focusing on yourself so much and start paying attention to what's going on around you. Listen, watch, reflect, think, observe, question.

    If Erin only ever reflects on Erin, then Erin will never be anything more than Erin. Conservation of matter.

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  27. They do not want me as their role model

    That wasn't the question.

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  28. Erin

    My question was, would they want to be your role models.

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  31. 'At least those two are real and not freakin phonies.'

    are you kidding?

    'I hate people who are turds yet are arrogant about it.'

    clearly, you love them. medusa is trying to offer you advice, not attack you ,what have those two ever done for you? when have they ever shown any humility?

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  32. I like CLOWNS!..lol

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  33. I hate people who try to one up others with intellectual minutiae.I hate people who think they are "Goddess" for some stupid reason like they know big words.

    You are twisting words around your insecurities. Especially mine.

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  35. If I may interrupt for a moment what this comment section has become...

    To the original poster - yes, you obviously have more garden variety narcissism. There's nothing wrong with that, just look in the mirror and accept it. Anyway, Psychopathy is just a deeper part of the narcissism spectrum so you seem to be more interested in the title and some feeling of specialness that comes with it rather than being honest with yourself and examining your own pathology.

    There is a book I recommend titled Narcissism - Denial of the True Self by Alexander Lowen. I suspect you would benefit from reading that. You talk about wanting power. Well, self-awareness is highly empowering. Good luck.

    Erin, feel free to misinterpret my intentions as your pathology demands but I suspect you would benefit from reading that book as well. The author addresses Borderline tendencies in some insightful ways that may be valuable to you. Good luck.

    M.E - Thank you for the service you provide with this website. You're doing a good thing.

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  36. "You're only engaged here when the subject is you, and you only reply to comments about you."

    Maybe the other topics are over her head?
    Erin is that possible? I ask you because I want you to look deep inside yourself and ask yourself would you feel "stoooopid" like maybe someone a long time ago drill into your head, if you said something and it was *gasp* wrong, or someone here said "stfu"? cause I don't say everything i ponder in a conversation either. Just wondering. These people are very smart. Moeover , they call you names like moron and imbecile if you don't say something they think is relevant.

    Maybe it's true, afterall, that you are not as "intellectual" as you'd like to be?

    just trying to see if I can be of assistance, Erin, because maybe you should take a stab and experience imperfection so you can get over being wrong

    ..I know you regulars are going to be rolling your eyes a lot, cause you all like to talk important shop-like science, evolution, and morality and you guys know a lot.

    Sometimes people are shy.


    Do any of you sociopaths ever get shy ? Just curious.

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  37. I like how nobody addresses the actual issues on here. Instead people try to pull out a diagnosis without a single credential or conversation with the person. What's more funny is this is the crowd that bemoans labels, yet has their label maker ready when anyone walks in the door.
    "She's obviously a beeper"
    "She's a narciccist of some sort"
    "She's got RAD"
    Seriously? Who cares what she is. You have no credentials, no experience, and no game. If you think someone fits a certain archtype you should keep it to yourself and use it to exploit them when they come on here. Why would you show all your cards when we haven't even placed our bets yet? Fucking amateurs.

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  38. Another thing:

    Why is anyone paying any attention to Erin? She had her 15 minutes of fame (More like 15 days of monotony). How can you guys not be BORED of her. She is so simple and boring. I personally know hundreds of women like her. She's old, insecure, retarded, trying to act cute, and lonely. She has refused help and deserves only misery and humiliation. She let her son get fondled by her husband till he was so screwed up he offed himself. Real story or not, it's pathetic.

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  40. UKan - I bet you learned all that kindness and generosity from your mother... The word of the day is conscientious, get a clue that maybe, just maybe, there is a better way to exist in this world.

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  42. UKan - I bet you learned all that kindness and generosity from your mother... The word of the day is conscientious, get a clue that maybe, just maybe, there is a better way to exist in this world


    I can't tell. My wife, who's more intelligent than you, tried to tell me 'successful' means you are "happy with your life".
    My definition of success is power and influence. The more you have, the more successful you are.
    As I told her, she can have all the idealist views she wants on how to exist in this world as a success, but society holds the standard for a reason. There's no other way to exist in the world for me, except the way I live. In reality it helps me get ahead. The word of the day on this site is never going to be 'conscientious' so go light some insence you fucking hippy. The people who have no conscience are the ones getting ahead, so you can take that shit and shove it.

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  44. Ukan - You say the people who have no conscience are the ones getting ahead.. I admit, it's quite a potential advantage but it needs to be used as such. If you go around in a state of unfocused anger tearing people down for the sake of it you aren't going to get much of that "power and influence" you use to define your success. Acting in a conscientious manner allows you to do some good in the world, and thereby gain far more "success" than your current mode of behaviour. You wish to have control, but are you in control of yourself? Or are you acting on impulses that you allow to define yourself and therefore control you rather than you controlling them? You don't have to respond :)

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  45. I do not like assessments given to knife you as I explained to Medusa.

    And how did you come to that assessment? There was no "kniving" intention involved.

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  47. My contribution to the blog:

    http://youtu.be/fJAx5BOWPM8

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  48. Is this how the new hipster scene queen is born? "I was a sociopath before it was cool"

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  49. do sociopaths really try to copy facial expressions? i thought that was just a myth. ukan, do you do this?

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  50. no. I think people think that because we try to emulate people's natural reaction to things.

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  51. Copying facial expressions is dumb, why would anyone do that?
    I mean mirroring movements like the arms how the other persons sits etc, but the face must show a response it is a direct answer for the other person to absorb, but if the person smiles yea, you should smile too apart from that lol i cant think of anything else right now

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  52. Yes my English is great i had A++ on history. Do you approve? I need approval. Just kidding im right all the time even when im wrong.

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  53. @ukan

    yea, that's what i thought.

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  54. some people make sociopaths out to be robots. i think sociopaths can feel the full range or emotions, but only for themselves.

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  55. A) There is a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 15 years, as indicated by three or more of the following:

    failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest;
    deception, as indicated by repeatedly lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure;
    impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead;
    irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults;
    reckless disregard for safety of self or others;
    consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations;
    lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another;

    B) The individual is at least age 18 years.
    C) There is evidence of conduct disorder with onset before age 15 years.
    D) The occurrence of antisocial behavior is not exclusively during the course of schizophrenia or a manic episode.

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  56. PCL-R items

    The following findings are for research purposes only, and are not used in clinical diagnosis. These items cover the affective, interpersonal, and behavioral features. Each item is rated on a score from zero to two. The sum total determines the extent of a person's psychopathy.[72]

    Factor 1
    Aggressive narcissism

    Glibness/superficial charm
    Grandiose sense of self-worth
    Pathological lying
    Cunning/manipulative
    Lack of remorse or guilt
    Emotionally shallow
    Callous/lack of empathy
    Failure to accept responsibility for own actions

    Factor 2
    Socially deviant lifestyle

    Need for stimulation/proneness to boredom
    Parasitic lifestyle
    Poor behavioral control
    Promiscuous sexual behavior
    Lack of realistic, long-term goals
    Impulsiveness
    Irresponsibility
    Juvenile delinquency
    Early behavioral problems
    Revocation of conditional release
    Many short-term marital relationships
    Criminal versatility

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  57. For professional help call: 1-800-999-9999

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  58. Whats the point of this list of attributes. Everyone here I'm sure is aware of them.

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  60. ukan are u a narcissist?

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  61. i miss that asshole adam. he was little jerk, but he was our little jerk.

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  62. why did notable delete his blog?

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  64. @Anon: Maybe his therapist made some progress. :D

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  65. Also, I just noticed that there was a rather hilarious comment on a number of my blog posts:

    "are you:
    • Owing Gambling debts.
    • Your House undergoing foreclosure.
    • Not able to live up to your standards.
    • Have such bad credit you can’t assess get a loan.
    • Unhappy with the life you are currently living
    • Hate that 9-5 work.
    • Living from pay check to paycheck
    • Too much financial burden
    • A sociopath brother or sister needing to make cash
    Generally you need money to break it large but you can’t seem to make it as you desire, If you have some level of education or able to act on phone, able to be discreet in your spending when you make the money then we may be able to work together.
    This is not a work from home scheme, neither is it for the very morally inclined wannabes, this is not a loan offer, but an offer for intelligent people who lack sense of moral responsibility and social conscience, who never feel remorse when they lie, steal or manipulate, very cautious but bold working people needing to be rich,

    A totally safe and totally anonymous project, your cut will be received under conditions that would never raise eyebrows.

    If you are interested send an email for more details to: brownmarkus@yahoo.cn
    If you are a morally inclined person do not mind to reply."

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  66. So, what if you're morally inclined to reply?

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  67. @everyone

    on a scale of 1 to 10, how hot are you?

    on a scale of 1 to 10, how awesome are you?

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  68. Erin said...
    Where is Lycan?
    I hope he did not think I was making a play for him.
    I cannot do Pisces or Virgo's Darlink


    Your narc streak makes me laugh...loudly... and quite a lot...
    Thats ok...because I dont 'do' women that have no "off" button, but if the erroneous ideal that I was making a 'play' for you makes you feel good within yourself and bolsters your self esteem then more power to you!!..( kidding!!!)....the thought of that actually is right up there with

    A: chasing the neighbours cat out of the garbage
    B: wiping a thoughtfully placed booger of the underneath the table and
    C: scratching my arse.

    sometimes you are a bit like a clothing tag Erin, you itch and irritate until you are ripped of the clothing.
    This site is a socio shirt...wash with care and dont tumble dry or it will shrink and be extremely uncomfortable.

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  72. So you're not attracted to him because of some square placement? I don't care what sign they are, as long as they can make me cum.

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  73. She is just a cock teaser.

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  74. Labels and archetypes is like putting faux control on complexity.

    Example: She is just a "cock teaser."

    Does this really say anything about the complexity of a woman's sexuality, her sense of play or her desires?

    No, yet it gives the appearance of control. (sadistic smirk)

    @Regarding post:
    "I always feel extremely powerful when people pay attention to me or treat me in a special way."

    You go girl. The reality show generation speaks!

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  75. This is the bullshit that my asshole sister-in-law likes to post:

    "To all those men who say, " Why marry the cow when you can get the milk for free?" Here's an update for you.....Today 80% of women are against marriage. Why?....Because women realize it's not worth buying an ENTIRE pig just for a LITTLE SAUSAGE!!!!!!! Keep it going girls.... this is too funny not to repost"

    One of these days I'm going to punch her in her fat face.

    Plus, I really doubt that my brother has a small penis.

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  76. Marriage is a sacred thang. And I am sure your brother is well endowed.

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  77. Also, fighting perceived misogyny with misandry is just a complete logic fail.

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  78. That's got to be bullshit. 80%?
    I highly doubt that. Sounds like something women post just because they're insecure about men.

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  79. @Medusa Logic fail especially since sexes keep propelling to each other like iron to a magnet.

    @Eden. Percentages, another control tool for the irrational.

    Its summer. Are we support to be having drinks on the deck every night?

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  80. yes... I realize you already made that point Medusa. I was writing that comment, and then my daughter called, and so I didn't post it till after I hung up.

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  81. No, I just meant that you got why it was stupid, I wasn't being sarcastic.

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  82. Insecure and vulnerable are not the same. One is like water on fire, the other a fan on fire.

    Burn baby burn.

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  83. Eden you are a stellar mother. Just an observation.
    Perfect doesn't exist. Stellar yes.

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  84. I go rounds with a few women I know, who always post shit up about how proud they are to be a crazy bitch. Trying to get all the other women to re-post about how great it is to be a basket case!
    I laugh every time cuz I know they don't believe that shit for a second.

    They think they're fooling the men, while at the same time, justifying their own psycho behavior.
    I should know. I used to do that shit when I was like 5.

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  85. I know I like arguing with fools, but I'm restraining myself. Because I know she'll just be passive-aggressive in response to me calling out her passive-aggressiveness. And then she'll justify herself with some twisted logic about how she's just "trying to do what's best for the kids".

    Which is what happened a couple of weeks ago. It's like shooting bullets in a rubber room.

    Woman is a child.

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  86. We all boast. Its kind of a habit of intensity. I enjoy being the crazy one in my conservative circles. And the centered and rational one at the crazy gatherings. I seem to hold the opposite pole of the group. Kinda fun and creative place to hold.

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  87. @Soulful

    I do really well as a mother. It was something I thought for sure I'd fail at. Everyone else thought I would to.
    Even as a child myself, I was some what abusive to other kids. But my children are effortless. I don't see them as work. They are the only people I seem to be able to attach myself too.

    I will admit that I still am not as attached as a typical mother would be. When my eldest is gone during the summer... I don't miss her. But I'm always happy for her to return.

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  88. I'm great with kids, but I don't think I could ever be a mother, but I have great respect for those that can.

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  89. I understand. I travel quite a bit on my own. Consistency is important - that the children or people you are attached to can depend on you. I do not expect perfection in myself or others. Human nature loves to nurture its nature.

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  90. Raising children is like a triathlon which never ends. I am sure you would develop the right muscles Medusa to create a dynamic environment. Your music and business are your offspring.

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  93. Cliché Alert:

    Before my first born, I had nothing to lose. I didn't have plans, didn't give a shit about where I was going, or if I got killed along the way.
    People thought I was psycho.

    I'd walk the streets of the war zone I lived in, in the middle of the night without as much as a gun, or stick.

    I think people left me alone because they kind of figured I wouldn't be so bold if I didn't have something crazy up my sleeve, they might not want to pull on.
    It helped that they thought I worshiped Lucifer, and practiced voodoo! lol

    I was 21 when I got pregnant, and it changed everything.

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  94. Your music and business are your offspring.

    Yep, that's what I always say. I give birth, just not to humans.

    Keyword: sublimation.

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  95. Eden, you are saved and raised by playing your genes forward. What was the father like?

    I used to write horror and read it before my pregnancy. Could not do it after. Have not been able to go back to that style of prose.

    I love to scare Christians with voodoo doo doo.

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  96. Medusa is Gaia who gives birth to the titans.

    Freud would agree. Sublimate away . . . .

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  97. What do you think of this youth who posted?

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  98. Just that: youth.

    Wasted on the young.

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  99. Hmm the father. Funny you should mention scaring Christians in the same sentence.

    He was a virgin Christian. Brain washed by his mother and church to fear sexuality and himself. He was so pure. I was drawn to that. The desire to corrupt him was just too tempting.

    He refused to have sex with me, so I started working on him. It took me five months to wear him down. He started letting me do other things, but my goal was to get him to go completely against his promise to himself, and so he did.

    I was pregnant after the first round, and not for lack of protection. He would have never let me have an abortion. But I don't think I would have gotten one even if he did.

    Unfortunately, he was too sheltered and young still, to be a mature parent. And after I gave birth, I didn't want him anymore. Now he's a bitter and damaged. Going on his 3rd marriage.

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  100. i don't mean to be rude, but why do women almost always take everything so literally and seriously, and then attack each other over men? it's always the same no matter what corner of the world or culture or even sexual orientation. why???

    are men smarter? maybe men are just smarter?

    medusa, you never attack the "alpha" guys here, only the women. why? some of their posts are so dumb.

    anyway i think the pig joke is just a joke, the way getting the milk for free is just a joke. it's funny, and a bit lame too - which i guess is what makes it funny.

    well 'nite y'all. feel free to yell and stuff. :)

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  101. Eden, good breeding stock.

    The best advice . . . .
    If you are a socio, learn to use your drives for power to help you keep self control. For instance, it bothers you when you weird people out because you lose power over those people, right? So let the part of you that craves power lead you to a better choice, e.g. keep people wanting more by being less available. Read the Art of Seduction and 48 Rules of Power.

    @Zoe
    Feel free to yell and stuff. Shopping. Latte. Yell and stuff. Pedicure. Yell and stuff. Bend over and Take my whip, now. Yell and Stuff. Hide the sausage.

    'nite y'all'

    I believe the best position of for power is one of service . . . to a vision, a vocation or others. And somebody needs to lead and those who love power should hold those positions.

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  102. *Opens the door to the living room. Startles at the chattering ladies. Closes the door and mumbles away*

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  103. @Soulful

    Yes, I'm just now beginning to understand that. It's taken me longer to come to the place I'm now at, than my peers... but better late than not at all.
    That's why I don't keep a partner for the time being. I no longer have to focus my energy on playing at a mate's perception of me. So it frees up some energy to gain what I want with my writing, and the business I run

    I've heard of both book suggestions. May have to check them out. Thanks.

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  104. AMoralBing's SausageAugust 17, 2011 at 9:53 PM

    Why close the door you nebbish!

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  105. medusa, you never attack the "alpha" guys here, only the women.

    If you pay attention, this is not true.

    Just ask UKan or TNP or Misanthrope. We've been around so long that the attacking phase is mostly over, except when one of them says something egregiously stupid.

    See also: SocioFreemason

    Also, playing something off as "just a joke" is to miss the big picture. There's a reason why some people find it funny in the first place.

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  106. @Zoe

    I've seen her make jabs at the alpha males. But it's pretty obvious that they are rocks, and can't be moved. Why beat your head against a rock?

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  107. Vocanic Islands.

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  110. nikita is so mysterious... are you ukan?

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  111. Soulfulpath said...
    @Zoe
    Feel free to yell and stuff. Shopping. Latte. Yell and stuff. Pedicure. Yell and stuff. Bend over and Take my whip, now. Yell and Stuff. Hide the sausage.


    lol

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  112. Medusa said...
    Just ask UKan or TNP or Misanthrope. We've been around so long that the attacking phase is mostly over, except when one of them says something egregiously stupid.


    oh too bad i must have missed it. can you do it again?

    Also, playing something off as "just a joke" is to miss the big picture. There's a reason why some people find it funny in the first place.

    i think jokes like that help people cope with the fears and inequities in life. they're simple but then so are many people. i had the impression you are a misogynist. if not, my bad.

    i actually don't understand your attitude toward Erin, why you object to her being here and the way she posts. she's not afraid to play around and be herself, to throw out something that may or may not be dumb. you gotta respect that. life is short. don't you just wanna play?? :)

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