Thursday, August 25, 2011

Bisexual sociopath

This letter to a Salon advice columnist ("A bisexual sociopath wrecked my life") made me laugh out loud. The poor jilted lover goes on to describe the many crimes to their relationship in which her man engaged (the story should seem quite familiar to followers of this site). For some reason, though, this paragraph stuck out as being particularly laden with humor:
Trying to recover from the shock of discovering his secret sexual life was very difficult for me. The most scary part is that I still to this day can not think of any clues or signs that I should have picked up on to signal his activity. He was a master at keeping that secret part of his life secret. Before I found out about his infidelity, he used to accuse me of being very jealous and his favorite example would be that he should be able to call me from a roomful of naked women and I still should have faith that he wasn't cheating, I should always give him the benefit of the doubt. In the abstract, I do believe in giving a loved one the benefit of the doubt. But considering that he was rampantly cheating on me when he uttered those words, I believe that he was very cruel.
I love that part: "In the abstract, I do believe in giving a loved one the benefit of the doubt. " I think this paragraph sums up the real issues that victims have with their victimizers:
Now, I find myself wondering how he could be so loving and charming when we were together, and be so awful and cruel behind my back? Mostly, I am trying so hard not to be bitter. I don't understand why he could be so cruel to me, and now he is literally having the time of his life without me. His career is at a lifetime high, he is in the most prestigious position he has ever had, making the most money he's ever made. He lives in the best part of town, and he goes drinking and partying every night. Since he left me, he is having the most fun of his life. It's not fair that someone could treat another person so terribly and be rewarded in life. So many people think he is such a wonderful person -- he is very well liked by many, many people -- but secretly I know the truth. I, on the other hand, am trying to rebuild a life after letting him be the center of my world for the last two years. I'm in therapy, trying to make sense of how cruelly he cheated on me and how someone I loved so much could be so deceptive. It doesn't seem fair to me that he could cheat on me so rampantly, leave me in such a cold way, and now he is at the pinnacle of his life and I'm fighting just to create a life for myself.
She concludes: "I fight internally, because on one hand I want him to suffer some consequences for how he treated me and yet I know it's not right to wish ill will toward anyone." The advice columnist gave a pretty canned answer not worth repeating.

194 comments:

  1. "I, on the other hand, am trying to rebuild a life after letting him be the center of my world for the last two years."

    Oh brother

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  2. ."..I know it's not right to wish ill will toward anyone." ?

    This is just repressed.

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  3. In fact, the article doesn't seem real at all. -Sounds like a Murdoch paper and Lovefraud made a deal to hate on gays and promote her site, whatevr

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  4. "I clung" stands out as the problem.

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  5. This bitch doesn't realize that that guy was doing so well by himself that he didn't need her. She should be grateful for him still wanting to stick with her loser ass in this situation.

    She is bitter because he doesn't need her. Why the fuck would you punish someone for that.

    What a stupid bitch this is.

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  6. People put too fucking much emphasis on their emotions and feelings. And regarding them, we're the narcissists.

    FUCK you normal people. You're what remains after you sieve the grain: garbage, useless, burdens. You should all die and go to hell.

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    1. If you sociopaths are as superior as you think you are why don't you bring your cheating and lying out into the open for all to see? Why wear the mask? Why? because you know you would never be accepted in the real world, you would be shunned and hated. You are all immature cowards with the vocabulary of a chavy teenager. I know a sociopath and underneath he desperately craves to have the normal family life that he sees other people enjoying but he has no idea he will never have this as he is the problem. His brain is wired wrongly. He only knows anger because that is the most childlike emotion humans possess and the sociopath misses the maturing phase of their life and walks around as an adult child not realising that they are the biggest joke on the planet because everyone sees through them eventually. The sociopath I know has but two friends, a fellow sociopath and a family member of low intelligence. He thinks he's the big man and yet when he walks away from a crowd he's the one everyone's laughing at.

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    2. You're not a sociopath, you're just a twat :)

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  7. Anon 12:34

    Lol, you might be on to something. ;)

    Regarding the article: I can respect her for not being a "I can take my revenge on him without feeling guilty because he could do the same to me without feeling guilty but I'm still way better" kind of empath, but not much else. I think the most annoying part of this story is that other empaths will actually appluad her for being so horribly dependant on someone, as if that's some kind of virtue. I thought independend women are much more respected nowadays? Must be because of Twilight...

    Oh, and she no longer believes in karma, so at least her relationship taught her something. :)

    The image made me think of these scorpions

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  8. It does seem made up

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  9. When are people going to learn that cheating is NORMAL human behavior? This man is a jerk, not every jerk is a sociopath. Ugh.

    The response to this letter is actually really funny, because it blames the victim. "This can be the moment at which you make a great breakthrough and see life in a new way, and see that certain beliefs you have may have made you vulnerable to this predatory personality." "Never let this happen again." Hahahahahaha.

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  11. "When are people going to learn that cheating is NORMAL human behavior? This man is a jerk, not every jerk is a sociopath. Ugh."

    That was my thought.

    What should she do now? Get an STD screening, stat.

    A lot of people, especially people in high profile fields are still closeted because it could affect their job. It sounded like he needed a token straight relationship to cover for what he felt was a detrimental lifestyle to his career. Did he lead her on? Sure. Did she want more than he told her he would give her? Definitely. People lie, people cheat, people break up... time to move on and maybe next time keep your eyes open instead of fumbling around in the dark with your arms outstretched grasping for thrown scraps.

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  12. lodes of guys r like this how is he a sociapath

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  13. Fuck this fucking cunt bitch. Oh no my bf was gay and I Never knew! Double the cunt, hold the fucking fuck. The best part of this story is where she realizes that shes not even a goddamn cautionary tale. Just a stupid fucking cunt bitch that fell so low she knows she deserved it. Oh fucking gee, thanks for sharing your pathetic life experience and the fact that you have no balls. Great fucking story, whore. I hope you die from the AIDs you contracted with your monthly Obligatory Pity Sex. Stupid bitch.

    And your BF wasn't a sociopath, he was just a fucking faggot. Rejoice you sonova goat's testicle, now you're free to fuck up your life, again! Oh the possibilities!



    PS: Fuck You.

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  14. Someone's in a bad mood

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  15. Maybe she's sheltered, comes from mississippi and is a republican.

    There are no homos out there. They hide their Jews too. I went to school with a girl who actually thought they STILL had horns -sheesh.

    All this evil has certainly ruined her chances for having faith in humanity again. It might take her months to get get back her religion, poor thing.

    I don't know why u all don't have more sympathy! Some people, God bless them, are still innocent. Why are you making matters worse!

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  16. Um
    I would't go as far as saying cheating is normal? Yeah it happens -a lot (and there's more people in fauxnogamy relationships than ever coming out now -not that that's cheating.)

    Outright cheating is destructive to people who have made promises to be in committed relationships.

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  20. Wow you are dramatic, Erin. Have you ever thought of writing for soaps?

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  21. This would be an interesting experiment. It test how biased/prejudiced you are, based on associations people have with words. First it makes you put faces of European/American people in the same category as 'good' words (such as glorious and peace), while you have to put the faces of black people in the same category as 'bad' words (nasty, evil). Then the black/white categories are switched (so 'bad' goes with 'white', and 'good' goes with 'black'). The results are based on the difference in performance (both speed and accuracy) before and after the switch. Performing better before the switch suggests a bias against black people, and vice versa.

    This is interesting because it uses emotional associations people have with words, e.g war gets a 'bad' response from the lymbic system, and peace gets a 'good' response. Normal people get these responses when they say a word, hear a word, read a word and even think a word (but not words like table or door, those are considered neutral).

    According to what I've read (I can't find the source anymore, might get back on that) sociopaths and psychopaths don't have these emotional associoations, so (this is my own conjecture) they shouldn't het results indicating extreme bias.

    Wanna try?

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  22. Yes, Erin, socios give and then take away 2 seconds later. I've noticed the trend, too.

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  23. "Outright cheating is destructive to people who have made promises to be in committed relationships."

    I never said cheating is not destructive. Of course it is destructive. Lots of normal things are destructive. Hatred, jealousy, anger, promiscuity... all normal things.

    This advice column is absurd because it treats cheating as if it is pathological behavior. Our culture in general seems to have this same attitude, even though it is clearly false. When a celebrity cheats on his wife, we act like that celebrity has a "sex addiction."

    The better we can distinguish normal behavior from sociopathic behavior, the better we can protect ourselves. This man would probably not feel the need to cover up his gayness with a "straight" relationship if society didn't have such unrealistic expectations for his behavior. In an ideal world, he would be able to be promiscuous and gay WITHOUT hiding it and without being stigmatized for it. I'm not trying to excuse the pain he has inflicted on this poor woman, but unfortunately acting straight to hide a gay lifestyle is not abnormal at all.

    Strangely enough, they also pathologize the VICTIM of cheating. They act like she invited the cheating upon herself. Why? She didn't do anything wrong. This whole thing is pathologically stupid!

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  24. "I would't go as far as saying cheating is normal?"

    wut ofice do u not work in

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  25. I'll try anythang. But I doubt I be tellin my results, white boy.

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  26. 712
    Haha I don't work in one. good point.

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  27. Wheatley, this is incorrect. What happened is they gave an implicit association test to diagnosed psychopaths that tested their emotional associations with violence. They found that ASPD's do not think violence is bad. This is different than the implicit association test for racism. An ASPD can still be racist. I have searched online for the psychopath version of this test, no luck.

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  28. "acting straight to hide a gay lifestyle is not abnormal at all."

    It should be. Repressed society we live in. It's a symptom of repression and religious bs.

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  29. Refudiate

    It doesn't matter if you're racist or not. The test doens't ask you to give your opinion by placing bad words by a race you consider to be bad.

    If you're a racist psychopath, that means that you only 'feel' a bad association with black or white people, but not with the words in the test. So it's still not counter-intuitive to place 'bad' words in the same category as your preferred race.

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  30. "Oh fucking gee, thanks for sharing your pathetic life experience and the fact that you have no balls."

    How did you deduce that, genius? She's a woman, of course she has no balls. Unless "her" boyfriend was gay and open about it all along. Lol

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  31. I dislike the fact that the term "sociopath" is becoming a throw away phrase. As soon as you do something supposedly morally questionable you have people, like this advice columnist, calling you a monster.
    The only people who are actually qualified to make such judgements are psychs and shrinks, and thats after a careful diagnostic examination.

    This guy is a liar, not a monster.

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  36. @David

    You know that negative reinforcement doesn't work all that good on sociopaths right?

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  38. @Wheatley: I actually took that test twice when I first heard about it years ago. The first time, I got a 'minor preference' (or whatever their 'just off neutral' rating is) for black people. Then I took it the next month and got the same for white people. Then I just started playing with it to try to game the system. It's surprisingly easy.

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  39. Just saying that if you're using antabuse '├žause you're trying to stop drinking, you should consider more effective alternatives first. Even then you could just use antabuse besides those. As I said: negative reinforcement doesn't work well, because it involves a part of the brain that doesn't work well. Try positive reinforcement.

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  40. @Post

    I said positive reinforcement because I meant 'increasing the likelyhood of not drinking', and... wel... *ahem* sorry. :(

    About the test; I got the idea from a different test that followed the same principle. It had something to do with reading to colums of words--one with bad/good terms, and one with stereotype western and muslim names--, and your score was based on the time difference between two tries. I scored a neutral, which made me feel pretty smug at the time.

    Looking back, that might've been an early indication, that's why I'm interested.

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  41. "If you want see some of the MOST messed up people alive,look at shrinks"

    Cheers

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  42. are you a shrink, PMS?

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  43. She'll find a better man, probably wake up and feel thoroughly glad he's gone.

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  44. if you take empathy out of the equation, sociopaths are the sanest people on the planet.

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  45. "People put too fucking much emphasis on their emotions and feelings. And regarding them, we're the narcissists.

    FUCK you normal people. You're what remains after you sieve the grain: garbage, useless, burdens. You should all die and go to hell."

    You sound like a total idiot. lol

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  47. Would a psychopath please tell me, why therapy makes psychopaths worse?

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  48. "In general, psychopaths are afraid of changing and want to stay as they are. Therapy can't make them 'more cunning', but if it is imposed on them they may use it to gain more knowledge of how society expects people to behave. For example, they may use some of the therapy to help them fake empathy.

    Actually, sociopaths/psychopaths usually don't understand that it is possible to change or that any kind of therapy can help. According to Canadian researcher Robert Hare, a specialized therapy geared exclusively for psychopaths is being developed.

    Until the extreme and debilitating brain abnormalities that all psychopaths have can be changed in some way, the only thing that can be done is to try to control much of the worst of it with medications and that type of therapy that is the brainchild of Robert Hare and associates.

    One of the worst things about psychopaths is that they are in a near-constant state of cortical underarousal: the cerebral cortex is not fully awake. They cannot sustain excitement for very long and become exhausted and lethargic easily, even as they still crave stimulation. It is interesting to note that there is another mental illness that is sometimes confused with psychopathy but is neurologically its exact opposite: Borderline Personality Disorder. In people with BPD, the cerebral cortex is usually overaroused, and the reaction of "fight-or-flight," so sluggish in psychopaths, is in people with BPD so intense as to necessitate medications such as beta-blockers to prevent the violent stress reactions from causing early death due to heart failure"

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  49. One study of criminals released from a program for personality-disordered offenders compared 176 who received intensive group and individual therapy with 146 who were not treated. The rate of violent offending decreased in non-psychopaths receiving t treatment, but increased among treated psychopaths when compared with psychopaths who received no treatment.
    * Another study of more than 300 offenders receiving social skills training and anger management therapy found that one-year reconviction rates were significantly higher in treated than in non-treated psychopaths.
    * A third study found that the sex offenders most likely to re-offend were those with strong psychopathic tendencies who were rated as "good risks" by psychological personnel because of their insight into their problems. In other words, Hare said, recid divism occurred most often in psychopaths "who had the ability to convince the therapists they had made good progress in treatment."

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  50. debilitating brain abnormalities

    How rude. Debilitating is such a prejudicial word.

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  52. Anon 12:21,

    You have a lot of flaws in your reasoning. We know it is possible to change and we don't fear change either. In many ways we are much more friendly toward change than are normal people.

    It isn't us who cling to norms and morals in order to maintain a status quo.

    One of the worst things about psychopaths is that they are in a near-constant state of cortical underarousal:

    This is true. Would you like to know why that is? The common explanation has it that we are prone to boredom (as if that's an explanation) and that we feel less, our emotions are more shallow than yours.

    The cerebral cortex is not fully awake

    Did you know that to us normal people come across as sleep walkers?

    If you have more capacity to feel, a wide range of emotions, you are more likely to feel under stimulated when there's nothing to arouse them.

    They cannot sustain excitement for very long and become exhausted and lethargic easily,

    Oh, and you know this how? It's a false interpretation based on your own tendency to overload easily which brings you stress and therefore longer 'excitement'.

    We are actually known for having the capacity to hyper focus, which means we can retain focus for periods that normal people cannot - provided our interest is aroused. It takes more to trigger our interest, true, but that's not the same as saying it doesn't happen.

    Don't listen to these prejudiced people. They see what they want to see.

    They call it boredom.
    I call it need for stimulation.

    They say it's because I have shallow affect.
    I say it's because I need to feel even more than you do.

    Who are you to say my emotions are weaker, more shallow, because they don't trigger an effect on the scanning monitor? Who are you to decide how high my blood pressure must be before it can be acknowledged as an emotional response?

    The worst sickness in modern time is the declining tolerance for human variety. We all have to share your range, type and depth of emotion or you have to come up with descriptions such as the one you quote.

    No, we are not afraid of change. YOU are! - or you wouldn't be in such a hurry to control us!

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  53. Has anyone on here ever loved like Erin said (Mine mine mine) and if so how did it turn out?

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  54. hello sophie. sociopaths don't love, they control. my friend is a sociopath and his poor wife can't leave the house without his permission.

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  55. Would a psychopath please tell me, why therapy makes a psychopath worse?

    The same reason this forum makes me worse. Therapy leads you to come up with your own conclusions after finding out who you really are. Zwaq wants to change because he's a rapist and keeps going in and out of prison and/or jail. For me I've discovered that I'm capable of great things. I don't want to change. I want to improve my manipulation and control. I want to take more money from people. I want more, period.

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  59. I really doubt that Zhawq is a rapist. He comes off as a good spirit and he treats others with dignity.

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  60. I was more hoping some of the sociopaths/psychopaths etc would answer, instead of anouther empath

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  62. The worst sickness in modern time is the declining tolerance for human variety. ..great quote

    I have to comment on this article. Funny you thought this could have been you Erin. I thought the same thing when I read it..lol...Here is my problem.. this is a grown woman, a mother, presumably intelligent and competent..etc..She got something out of this relationship. He helped her feel alive and full of excitement. She lost herself in the relationship...rearranged her life so she could protect her supply.. She got what she wanted from the relationship for a while. Why isn't that enough? Sometimes people come into our lives that touch a certain primal place. I say that to experience this can be reward in and of itself. Who doesn't get hurt? Instead of being bitter that this man is doing well, why not be ok with having experienced some pleasure for a while. Take some of what he gave you and keep it. It can be a true gift. It is not so black and white..all good or all bad...relationships cannot always be analyzed..sometimes they make no fucking sense other than they work for a time. This guy made her feel great...if she is smart, she will get over herself and keep the lessons that he taught her and be happy for people like him that have the capacity to touch in a powerful, if only temporary, way.

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  63. @bette blu
    Can't say I have missed you .
    The thing with this woman is that she is dead inside.
    Those are the types that need Socio's and BPD's
    So the fact that she is dead inside is not gonna be mitigated with intellectual anythings.

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  64. What would a sociopath do if their partner cheated on them?

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  65. UKan:

    Zwaq wants to change because he's a rapist and keeps going in and out of prison and/or jail.

    Where on earth did you dig that nonsense up? Lmao!

    I'll never change, I don't have to, because I'm great the way I am. As for jail, you are making yourself look like a fool here.

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  66. Ukan, show us the quote where Zhawq claims he is a rapist.

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  67. Sophie,

    we didn't answer because we didn't understand your question.

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  69. What exactly is the alternative to the "mine, mine, mine" sort of love?

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  71. Anonymous said...
    What would a sociopath do if their partner cheated on them

    I cant and wont speak for anyone else on this blog but if it were me that had been cheated on, I would spare NO expense in extracting what I deemed as 'just retribution' for slighting me in that manner.
    I think everyone has different triggers that spark up different responses to perceived 'slights' or insults or hurts.
    For me, being cheated on causes a rapid chain reaction of rage and anger that simply will not stop or abate until I am satisfied that my honor (as I see it) is restored.
    It is not blind rage, it is a silently malevolent process that takes in all aspects of the situation and works out the easiest way to achieve maximum pain/hurt to the recipient with the least effort.

    I make an effort not to cheat on anyone Im with, simply because I dont like it when its done to me , not for any other reason.
    For me retaliation can be a protracted, exacting saga so I only indulge in it at those levels when it trips certain triggers.If said triggers are set off then woe betide the dumbass who did it. Justified or not, acceptable or not...it makes no difference. I simply wont stop until Im satisfied and not a minute before. It is destructive, narcissistic and at times quite myopic but its how I like it sorted.
    The peace and satisfaction at achieving what Ive set out to avenge is usually as sweet as honey, and definitely 'more-ish' so I have to be careful I dont get carried away too much with it after the result happens.
    I have wondered if there have been times when I have subconciously 'bought on' being cheated on simply to justify to myself the process of retribution to appease my violent and at times sadistic nature.
    But in the vein of sociopathy...I decided that it just doesnt fucking matter......and that I will do whatever the hell I please :-)

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  72. The thing with this woman is that she is dead inside.
    Those are the types that need Socio's and BPD's
    So the fact that she is dead inside is not gonna be mitigated with intellectual anythings.


    Every once in a while you come up with a gem, Erin.

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  75. @Erin. only as complicated as you wish it to be.

    From what I have read from your comments is that you so badly want the archetypal 'love' that envelopes everything, fixes everything, overrides everything....and leaves you breathless, starry eyed and enraptured.
    You seek it from a sociopath because you had it...albeit rather briefly...and wish to return to that place of rapture , in the hope that your sociopath will "change' suddenly and be the person you think that they should be.
    A better idea would be to put your head in a door jamb and get someone to slam it repeatedly until you learn that you are flogging a dead empath.
    You have had some rather sage advice on it all from people on the blog yet you choose to ignore it and blather on in denial and ignorance. And you WONDER why the socio's get hostile????

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  76. Only an hour a day? You must be quite the looker.~

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  77. No, nevermind, that's childish. You must have just been boring.

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  78. I have wondered if there have been times when I have subconciously 'bought on' being cheated on simply to justify to myself the process of retribution to appease my violent and at times sadistic nature.

    Interestingly enough, this sounds very BPD. Only difference is the justfication. Same beginning and end, just a different way to get there.

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  81. Zwaq was it a lie? When we were talking about rape on here you said you had raped someone and asked if we wanted the story, but nobody responded. I know because the other week while you were gone I thought it was kesu. You are both so long winded and boring that I get you mixed up. When I went back it turned put to be you. Ill give you the link when I get back home, right now I'm using my phone. It seems you either lied and forgot about it or you are lying now. Either way it will be interesting to know the motivation you would have to do so.


    "We are much more friendly to change than normal people....."
    -Zwaq one minute

    "Where the hell did you get that Ill never change. I am great the way I am"
    -Zwaq the next minute

    Oh, no wonder you are denying you said that. You contradict yourself one comment to the next.

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  82. Postmodern Sociopath said...
    Only an hour a day? You must be quite the looker

    LMFAO!!.....I was going to make a similar comment.
    Its nowhere near long enough exact consistent satisfaction.

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  84. Even your "compliment" has barbs Miss Gaslighter

    I was being sincere, Erin. Some things are meant to be taken at no more than face-value.

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  86. @Medusa
    Yes Even Gaslighters don't Gaslight 24/7
    They have sex for one hour a day

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  87. Did you lie about going to jail too?

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  88. Funny you call me a gaslighter, but you are happy to be gaslighted by the likes of PMS and Lycan.

    Even though all they are doing is mostly just having a sense of humor. At your expense.

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  89. @Erin

    No, we wont say sex takes 4 hours a day. "we" are not "you".

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  90. I thought I remember Zwank implying murder.

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  91. @medusa

    yes there are aspects of it that seem BPD'ish. I should point out that I stopped self-questioning in that manner quite a while back though as it ended up just being a complete waste of headspace compared to any benefit I gained from doing so.

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  92. @Lycan
    So I made an "error" in time.Are you are gonna milk it for all it's worth?

    Answer :Yes


    @Medusa
    I have never seen someone Gaslight like you one other person
    You have it down to an Art Form

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  93. Erin, Lycan was objecting to your use of "we", implicitly characterizing yourself as somehow like him. Go figure.

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  94. UKan,

    "Oh, no wonder you are denying you said that. You contradict yourself one comment to the next."

    You really are the fool here, you know.

    But okay, let me repeat myself: I'll never change! I'm great the way I am!

    Did it sink in this time? Probably not. Oh well, who cares.

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  95. @erin

    Did you ever stop for a minute and think that maybe some of us socio guys enjoy the reparte with a woman like medusa because she DOES have barbs ...and can use them deftly?

    I for one enjoy the challenge of having a woman make me think, ponder or improve my guard.
    Theyre usually better in bed, can stand on their own two feet without whining and more deserving of my respect.
    Add that x-factor scent to that package, and a nice body, and WHOOPS!...there goes the day fucking.

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  97. So if you say it once its not true, but if you say it twice it is true?
    I'm no fool zwaq I'm only quoting what you said.
    You are so delusional that even if I throw your own quote in your face you still deny it. Unbelievable. So you say we are open to change. You can't really speak for us only yourself. Yet a comment later you say you will never change.
    You took the time to tell someone to put a outright lie for the reason you went to jail, now you are telling me I'm a fool for saying you went to jail.
    You said on the rapist thread that you raped someone, now you are saying you didn't rape someone, and apparently earlier from medusas account you must have said you murdered someone. You are a pathological liar.

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  98. Repeating yourself doesn't erase the last comment you made zwaq. You can repeat yourself all you want. You shoukd just go back and delete it. It would be just as shameless.

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  99. @erin

    sometimes you are like a small dog.
    Small dogs have an annoying habit of yapping a lot.
    They even try to bite, although their mouth and tooth size usually dictates that the bite will be negligable.
    After a while, being yapped at and mouthed, by such an animal, just makes one want to stamp on its head firmly and mercilessly.
    Tolerance is not infinite.

    Yes erin, at times your incessant refusal to 'learn'...becomes boring.
    If you wish to take that as a generalization that you 'boring' on the whole...then that is entirely your prerogative.
    shall I hold the door for you?

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  100. @Ukan

    Well if you "love" some one is it all about possession (Mine mine mine) or is there something else there?

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  101. Medusa:

    "I thought I remember Zwank implying murder."

    See, it's funny with this kind'a thing, when people make a silly mistake and then try and turn it around to make it seem like something it isn't.

    He (UKan) wrote about me that I want to change (become like a normal person - most likely something he read in Misanthrope's post the other day).

    That is what I replied to (which he is aware of), and then he brings up all kinds of shit from my past into the discussion, all of which has nothing to do with whether or not I want to change.

    Yeah, I've raped someone in the past, it happened many, many years ago.

    And yeah, I've killed people, more than I've raped, though not quite as many years ago, if that matters.

    I'm not afraid of my past, I don't regret my actions. Certain outcomes could've been better, but all in all I really cannot complain.
    I make no secret of all this.

    There's nothing about me that I want to change. I'm addressing this idiot for making a mistake and thinking he can bury it by shaming me.

    There'll be no such thing, I'm afraid.

    Too bad I'm not a pedophile, eh? You'd have brought that up too. Lmao. Attacking people where there's no weakness, that's weak, UKan! ;)

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  102. I rest my case ladies and gentlemen.
    To sum up the back to back pathological lies zwaq:

    So you said you are friendlier to change than normal people
    Then you said you will never change
    you denied being a rapist
    Now you are a rapist
    You denied going to jail
    Now you say you go in and out of jail

    If you had no shame why would you tell us so many lies. You are either lying about raping and murdering l, which is what I believe since you can't remember saying it till just now. Or you are ashamed of who you are. Which is it Wacky Zaq

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  103. I personally would like to get back on the subject and not like to see Zhwaq's head on a plate.

    Sophie still has not gotten an answer to her question.
    I tried but stepped in it.
    Men...................

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  104. is there something else there

    Whatever you imagine is there is what's there, just like usual.

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  105. I personally would like to get back on the subject and not like to see Zhwaq's head on a plate

    The subject... which of course, is YOU. Any other subject is not allowed! You're the only one allowed to offer heads on plates, yes?

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  106. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  107. Sophie I am married, but i will answer you in length on that when I get home in a half hour

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  108. Erin shutup this isn't your house and you are not in control here you stupid cabbage. The topic is whatever is interesting, not whatever brain fart you currently have. Watch it or your head is next you fucking muppet.

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  109. Because Sophie's question is the same thing you've been asking over and over. Which has been answered over and over. Which people are sick of, so you are hoping Sophie can be you SW proxy since she doesn't yet have a reputation.

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  110. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVQCw6HGZ5s

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  111. erin is most likely sophie.
    that is why she wants to get back to sophies question.

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  112. @Ukan
    YOU have not gotten my head yet and have tried so don't get any smart ideas in that direction Mr Boiled Cabbage

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  113. Not that you'd know a smart idea if it molested you in your own bed, Erin.

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  114. @Medusa
    SEE Ukan is gonna answer Miss Gas

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  115. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  116. Anonymous said...
    Would a psychopath please tell me, why therapy makes psychopaths worse?


    this just makes me lol

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  117. @erin

    I am seriously wondering now, if in fact, you are in reality a talking parsnip.

    A self important parsnip.(mundane)

    erin the annoying parsnip (slightly more quirky)

    parsnip bitch (droll)

    queen cunt of the parsnips (that one has a REALLY important ring to it huh?)

    See erin?...food motifs are useful.
    please go back to banging your head in the door, your not there yet.

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  118. Im sorry I didnt know that this question had been asked before.

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  119. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  120. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  121. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  122. Lol... insults by men are "cute"

    Poor Erin, her favorite of the week has turned on her. Again.

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  123. i see it's crabby Thursday. where did all the love go?

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  124. erin behaves like a teenage girl.

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  125. This woman is a sad sack of shit.
    How fruitless is making someone the center of your "whole world".
    That's the real problem right there. She needs to be going to therapy for not having a self of her own to center around.
    She's the kind of girl who hangs all her worth on proof of external love and being some, one and only.

    That someone could end up so destroyed over a cheat! Should have been investing in yourself you dumb cunt, you can't exchange love for currency!

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  126. the bisexual socio life wrecker sounds fun. she sounds leechy and bitter. how come some people don't know how to have any fun?

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  127. @Eden
    she could go for therapy or she could say fuck him and go for a beer. :)

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  128. Just for fun:

    This man is a sad sack of shit.
    How fruitless is making power over others the center of your "whole world".
    That's the real problem right there. He needs to be going to therapy for not having a self of his own to center around.
    He's the kind of guy who hangs all his worth on proof of his power over others and being some, one and only.

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  130. I found out my wife was bisexual. We decided to throw another women in now and again. If she wasn't such a prude this girl could have a lot of fun and I'm sure he wouldn't have been in the closet.

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  131. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  132. @Erin: Learn context. First two sentences was about UKan and his wife. Final sentence was about "this girl" from the post.

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  133. Sophie I'm back home but I'm not answering you on the principke that erin wants a answer. I promised you, but I didn't see erins comment since I automatically skip them

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  134. My answer is in the topic do sociopaths love in the comment section. Its on the main page to the right.

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  135. @Erin

    What do you know of "dead inside"?
    ... and I'm going to just go ahead and beat my head into the desk right now...

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  136. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  137. How does she know her partner was a sociopath? Guys lie and cheat, frequently. And the ones that don't seem more compelled not to because they'd rather not face karmic consequences, not so much because of their conscience. The penis is as amoral as a brain can get ;)

    I'm tired of all these 'My ex is a socio/narcissist/psychopath' articles that publications and websites push out. Some armchair PhD can't diagnose their ex objectively. It's impossible.

    Either way, at least she isn't going all crazy like Donna did. Let the guy thrive, and move on.

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  138. Erin you are dead 'up there' not 'inside'

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  139. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  140. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  141. I just got a tempur-pedic mattress I'm so excited.

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  142. @ erin
    the extreme self-absorbtion you demonstrate must be exhausting

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  143. women like bad boys, not evil boys.

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  144. @Ukan

    King? Queen? I'm trying to imagine your .

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  145. or absorption ..

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  146. @Ukan

    That sounds extremely comfortable.
    A good nights sleep is far underrated in my opinion. Hopefully the springs within your new tempur-pedic mattress will withstand the 'exercise'.
    I have a run of the mill fuck-your-back- a- pedic brand, but i intend to burn it in the near future.

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  147. @Lycan: Tempur-pedic doesn't have springs. That's the whole gimmick. "Memory foam". They're pretty nice, and they'd better be for that kind of money.

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  148. erin, you are the only empath who is brave enough to admit, that a socio is a stronger person than you are.

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  149. That's not true. The term "psychophant" was coined for a reason.

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  150. Erin is Jason, a teenage boy exploring his anima.

    Its interesting that M.E. Would say, I love that part: "In the abstract, I do believe in giving a loved one the benefit of the doubt. " I think this paragraph sums up the real issues that victims have with their victimizers. There are many issues there and to Eden's point much of this woman's baggage hangs on externalities, resentment for her betrayers happiness and success. While that might be easily relatable here, it is one of the cheaper seats on the emotional range. Resentment/jealousy is only useful if it is catalytic.

    @betteblu & @Eden, she got exactly what she wanted, and is subsequently taking the opportunity to complain about the exchange rate.

    @medusa nicely reframed.

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  151. Has anyone spent much time At lovefraud, is it just a muck hole and a wallow? Or do people escape from the quicksand? Do men moan bout their love cheats?

    Do any of you go in character or as understudies?

    Curious, but not enough to spend time over there.

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  152. Anyway...

    I had a dream last night, that I opened a special theatre where people could come to watch movies, and shroom, or fry. But they had to purchase the drugs along with their ticket, not just come with their own supply.

    It was kind of brilliant.

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  153. Anon 8:23,UKan's always talking about how he likes to troll over there.

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  154. Super king with ergo controls. My fathers coming to see me so I needed a guest bed. I decided to buy myself a new one and put the old one in the guest room

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  155. are u a bully and proud?

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  156. it's the narcissists who can never let go.

    two kids are told they're no good. for whatever reason, one thinks "i will change and next time they won't think that", and the other thinks "i will change them and next time they won't think that".

    she learned that her self worth depends on the image of her in his eyes only, not hers. all he has to do is let her see herself, even once, as everything she had always wanted to be and she will do anything, and give up everything to keep him. nothing she has that's hers can compare to what he tells her is hers.

    she is like the poor kid who lives down the street from you and gets to play at your house with your toys, but has nothing of her own and has to leave everything behind when she goes home. if you're in a bad mood and won't play she has to do without.

    she doesn't ever see how pretty her hair is or her eyes, and that the old dress she wears, she wears better than you ever could wear the expensive clothes that fill your closet. she worships you for all the wrong reasons, and for that you feel a secret contempt. because what you had really wanted was a little playmate, not a plaything.

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  157. david, stop the drinking and go back to school

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  158. I spent a lot of time on lovedraud laughing at the stories and as all kinds of users. I even made up stories on there with everyone feeling sorry for me. I went on there as Donnas ex husband John Montgomery and told her I wanted her back. I came on as ukan in character. Needless to say eventually my IP was banned but I moved so I can get back on.

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  159. "I went on there as Donnas ex husband John Montgomery and told her I wanted her back"

    lol

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  160. martinlutherking of socipathsAugust 25, 2011 at 10:27 PM

    On the one hand, love makes people do crazy things.... on the other hand, so do boredom, loneliness or just a plain old lack of option

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  161. @Ukan
    ok

    @Erin
    Whos mania?

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  162. Well UKan every 24 hours your IP changes.

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  163. Actually it depends on your contract, by default you will get a Dynamic IP, if you want to have a Static IP you got to pay for it, if there are ISPs which give static IPs to everyone that is a security risk not just for the consumer but also for the company itself, i dont know of any company which does that, but i guess in some countrys the struggle for controlling the internet traffic will eventually lead to everyone having its own static IP the motherfuckers want to control what everyone does even what kind of pornography you watch, i swear someday im gonna blow them all up

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  164. "I rest my case ladies and gentlemen."

    YOU rest your case? LMAO

    I think that's my line, UKan! Haha

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  165. Ukan, those mattresses are pure evil. We have them and I can't stand the things. Firstly, I hate the feeling of sinking into a goddamn bed everynight and it swallowing me up like a pea in a pod. And secondly, they are goddamn HEAVY to move around.

    Personally, I like hard mattresses. But w/e i'm bored.

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  166. Zoe:

    "welcome back Zhawq"

    Thank you, Zoe. It's good to be back. :)

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  167. I am married to a sociopath.
    My man is the Missing Link . Yes, that ape is all I could get for a husband so I settled . No man wanted me. I wonder why.They said I was obnoxious talking about how wonderful I am all the time.Well,if you have it flaunt it is my motto. I am PROUD of myself.I tell everyone how good I am .Why not? I am good and smart,too. Dammit
    That is why I married a sociopath.He looks worse than I do.
    I even had kids with him
    I won't let him beat the kids or me either.
    I am strong. I tell them how I trained my ape so he doesn't even bite me.
    DON"T YOU ALL WANT TO BE ME?
    Line up ladies.......

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  168. I will say Welcome Back too Zhawq
    Don't let the mosquitoes get under your skin.
    *I* don't :)

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  169. That last post 4:26 was not me!!!
    I only say how wonderful I am because I am for Dammit Fucks Sake.
    I talk all the time here and at home.
    I do ALL the talking with this man. He says two words all year.Good--more for me.

    I do all the beatings on the kids. That lets me get all my anger out on weak people.
    I hate weak people.
    I let my husband have as many woman as he wants.
    Dammit, Fuck and Bullshit.I got to KEEP him.Don't I?
    I don't care as long as I look good.
    This is Part One.
    Fuck, I will give you as many parts as you can take.
    Over and out
    Bette



    PS If you see a wild chimp on the road,rope him and call me PLEASE.

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  170. Winnie the Fucking PoohAugust 26, 2011 at 7:48 AM

    He is living the life and you are not for one very good reason: life is fair. It's not fair in the cute and cuddly way you want it to be, but it's fair none-the-less.

    This whole time, he's been focusing on his life, trying to make it the best he can. He hasn't relied on anyone else making his life great for him. He's taken responsibility for it, and to hell with anyone who would get in his way. You, on the other hand, made that man the center of your world. You relied on him for your happiness, and you know what? That's fucking retarded.

    So yes, when he fucked you off, you're miserable, because that's what you asked for. And yes, now that you're gone, he's still having a fantastic fucking life, because he never needed you.

    That's the funny thing about the moronically romanticized version of relationships... they're recipes for disaster unless all the stars align properly on the sixth night of the forbidden monkey. It's like spending all your money in Vegas on the slot machines. In a healthy relationship, person A doesn't NEED person B, and person B doesn't NEED person A. They don't rely on each other for happiness. They are both wholly complete and happy individuals by their own right, who CHOOSE to be together not out of something as pathetic as NEED, but because they LIKE each other, or, dare I say, LOVE each other. Pull your head out of your ass and focus on your own life, and forget about that dude. Until you do, you're just pathetically perpetuating the pathetic pathology that got you into this piss-poor predicament in the first place!

    Holy fucking shit.

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  171. omg this ukan does not have a live

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  172. @bette blu and Winnie the Fucking Pooh
    lol

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  173. This guy just sounds like a bisexual guy incapable of excluding one of the genders from his sexlife. Given that the woman wrote the article and (probably) excluded all faults on her behalf leads mo to believe that both parts acted poorly.

    If both of them were honest from the start they'd be having a threesome right now.
    That or a peaceful break up without the risk of all out warfare.

    My guess is that both of them, like 99.99% of the population, are morons.

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  174. I really hate that common "everyone else thinks he's wonderful, but I know the truth" - there is no truth. Everyone else thinks he's wonderful, and you don't. You're in the minority. Many will have an idea what he did to you and simply not care. You're opinion of him has no relevance as to whether or not he's wonderful or terrible.

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  175. I am a bisexual guy and I am always bisexual. My relationship and understanding my sociopathic nature is exclusive to my months to years long manic episodes but I don't date outside of my orientation. We don't whine and we as a group where I am at treat this garbage like trash because they always go with the straight women and gay men because being open doesn't make us shit... and when I am with another bisexual guy and anyone, even that are cool with gay people keep it up with the mouth, we take great pride in beating their asses. In my state, bisexuals assaulting gay dudes is a hate crime but fuck those whiners.

    I am bipolar and manic most often and in that state, I go cold and I date the types that are cool with my tendency to break some assholes jaw over it. We love the way we sit on the sidelines and our mere existence is a threat to your insecure identity crisis with this "straight acting" "no homo" bullshit you all do. it's amazing to see the months of crying about Duck Dynasty and straight people are being manipulated into the guilt trips from gay people... one of Matthew Shepards killers was bisexual and open about it and you guys all still buy it...

    it is just funny how you act like dumb shit like that is a life or death ordeal. And women fake our life to attract men when drunk. Gay people hate themselves so much that they pretend to be us. Hell, you all are projecting this insecurity shit you have with each other on to us. No respectable bisexual would ever date trash like him or admire it. We have a much healthier attitude toward sex and these types aren't sociopaths, they are cowards. Which is why they hide. It is sad that straight people have been so ruined into submission by gay people because you are all much more decent to us than gay people are. The guy is a self hater for straying to the straight woman anyway but they are tolerable to the abuse, lies as are the gays. They have low self worth.

    Also, if this is a closet case with a front family, that is a closet gay dude, not a bisexual. We only get sociopathic when unattractive women or men hit on us, we just pretend to be one or the other because we like our community here. We don't PDA or mention it in every other sentence or do that BS pride circus but that makes for much better sex. Manic states are my true relation to sociopathy though but close to the tail end it goes psychotic and that isn't the same but this coward is too obsessed with the faggot complex if he is bisexual and he's probably a closeted gay man with a front family.

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