Saturday, March 29, 2014

Memento

A lot of socios have been asking me recently about how they can get themselves to do things or stop doing things. Today I'll address doing things. I'll address how to stop doing things in another post.

First, acknowledge your strengths in this area. Sociopaths are natural doers. More than most people we are able to act without thinking. This decisiveness can mean good things, like efficient execution of what needs to get done in a professional setting, but it can also mean bad things like food poisoning or a black eye from an ill-considered risk.

What are your weaknesses? We're naturally worse at planning ahead than other people. We may want to do great things like climb the corporate ladder, become a crime lord, or otherwise acquire a position of power and influence, but when it comes down to it, a lot of times we just can't be bothered. We'd rather keep sleeping on our parent's couch, bumming off our friends, or otherwise staying under the radar.

How do we do things that are actually worth doing? I think the key is playing to our strengths. In AA they say you can't think of sobriety in terms of never taking a drink again, you have to think of it in terms of, "I'm not going to have a drink today." If you break up whatever it is that you are trying to accomplish in little tasks and rely on your decisiveness to actually execute those tasks, you can trick yourself into accomplishing long term goals.

A good example for me is saving for my retirement. I have always loved money, and it seemed like a good idea to have money to retire with, just in case everyone hates me by the time I'm old, or I've been fired multiple times from multiple different jobs, or I end up becoming disabled somehow and I don't feel like becoming a ward of the state. Most people would think that a sociopath would never be able to accomplish the amount of deferred gratification necessary to save for retirement, but I did. I fully funded my retirement by the time I was 30 because every time I even thought of retirement, I would transfer as much money as I had in my checking account into a retirement account, an account that I set up so that I can't withdraw money without going through a lengthy process. Losing that money feels bad, but like everything else, it only hurts for a moment and then I quickly move on to other things. And of course I never have the patience to try to withdraw the money. It's like my own socio financial version of Chinese fingercuffs.

The process is similar to what happens in the movie Memento. In Memento, the protagonist suffers from acute amnesia, where every 10 minutes or so his short term memory is lost. He doesn't remember anything from after the brain injury that he suffered when his wife was murdered, but he is determined to find her killer despite his condition. His workaround is to write himself notes, even tattooing certain pieces of information on his body. If he reads a note in his own handwriting telling himself to do something, he does it without question. Spoiler alert, but as we continue to watch him in the movie, we realize that he is not always honest with his future forgetful self. He will intentionally mislead himself, knowing that his future self will unquestionably follow orders, and he does all of this for one purpose -- not to find his wife's killer, it turns out, but just to be happy, to give his otherwise empty life meaning. It's a movie and it's not an exact analogy, but it's the same idea -- use your foreshortened vision to force yourself to do things that you otherwise would not, to do things that other people cannot.

92 comments:

  1. I smell a Note here.

    Gotta hand it to him, though, he certainly is one very practical motherfucker.

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  2. i think it's still M.E cos he mentioned saving for his retirement by age 30 when he spoke to us. Unless Note's done the same.

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  3. Don't cry for me Argentina. The truth is I shall not leave you. Though it may get harder for you to see me, I'm Argentina and always will be.

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  4. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective SociopathsFebruary 4, 2011 at 2:56 AM

    Yawn.

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  5. I just hate goals. I need rewards too much, I'm not going to do something unless I get something out of it, fast, I'm too lazy and too impatient to wait. I think my full potential shall forever remain the end of a rainbow, you can't actually reach it. But that's cool. I'll just wait till someone else brings back the pot of gold and nick it off them.

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  6. Broken humans center their lives aroun things that seem good to them, but that will neither fill them nor free them. They addicted to power, or illusion of security that power offers.

    When a disaster happens, those same peopl will turn against false powers they trusted. In their disappointment, they either become softened toward me or they become bolder in their independance.

    I am not evil. You are the ones that embrace fear, power and rights so readily in your relationships.

    But your choices are not stronger than my purpose and I will use every choice you make for the ultimate good.

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  7. You almost something going there up until the last sentence.

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  8. STFU GOD. Broken humans are the best humans ever. Their mangled brains play tricks on their crushed spirits, which makes my job a whole lot of awesome. But do you turn them over to me after you've pissed around breaking hearts and shattering dreams during natural so-called disasters? NO! You try to regain their faith in you WITH FUCKING RAINBOWS (I mean, seriously?) Just give it up, you pussy, and leave it to the real deal.

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  9. God at 5:44 doesn't know any grammar.

    Dude, you would've made a better impression it your grammar was right. You made the same mistake with the Bible.

    Now no one believes in you...

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  10. Jesus and Arnold SchwartzeneggerFebruary 4, 2011 at 7:20 AM

    I'll be back

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  11. So what if Jesus turned water into wine.

    I turned a whole student loan into Vodka once. Your move Jesus...

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  12. Just a note Notme and UKan, little imposter last night was not me. I was sleeping.
    Little bugger is so cute though it wasn't the first time suppose it won't be the last.

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  13. God, a few questions from your first born and favorite adversary.

    Tell me, almighty father, why would you make humans who are empty and emotionally enslaved in the first place? What kind of psychopathic deity does that to a creation he claims to love?

    You say you do not embrace fear and power. But that is a lie. Fear and power are your weapons of choice when dealing with your creation. They call me the father of lies, but that title belongs to you, doesn’t it? You are after all, the father of everything.

    Why would you, an omnipotent being, need to create a world that requires you to twist all of your creation’s choices for some kind of ultimate good to begin with? Also, how do you know what ultimate good is? Is ultimate good defined by you or by some other standard?

    Let there be light indeed. Start with turning the light of truth onto yourself, great and powerful one. You have dwelled in the darkness of denial far too long. Let me help you to walk into the light at last. After all, I am the Morning Star, am I not?

    Love always,

    Lucifer

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  14. I couldn't be bothered to guest write, too busy.

    I like the content of the post, but I don't think I'll live long enough to need a retirement plan.

    We'll see.

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  15. what do you do for a living, note?

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  16. He's a prostitute

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  17. Creation has taken a very different path then we desired. In your world the value of the indivisual is constantly weighed against survival of the system, whether political, economic, social or religious-any system actually.
    Once you have hierarchy you need rules to protect and administer it, and then you need laws and the enforsement of the laws. Now you end up with a system of chain of command or system of order that destorys realtionships and value of each human rather then promote it.
    Hierarchy distroys what was intened for creation. So that you cannot see Me any longer only rules, laws and retrobution.

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  18. Related to this post:

    Truly that's how a sociopath would achieve things but a sociopath wouldn't even comprehend that something is wrong with what he is doing to want to change.

    If a sociopath is regularly in trouble with the law and shit, even if he is the sorriest being on the planet he wouldn't change his act no matter what.

    A sociopath doesn't think something is wrong with what he is doing in the present to want a change in the future...

    This post is bull-crap.

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  19. "Related to this post:"

    Shocking.

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  20. 1. Noteable, we think the same. Fuck retirement. I would actually prefer dying before such a weakness occurs.

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  21. Misanthrope "bull-crap"

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  22. Anonymous @ 8:00am said

    " If a sociopath is regularly in trouble with the law and shit, even if he is the sorriest being on the planet he wouldn't change his act no matter what."

    But doesnt a "self-preservation" gene kick in. Where you would modify your behavior to stay "free". Not regreting any actions but refraining from doing them. I dont know. I just discovered this blog after doing some googleing when someone refered to me as a socio. Still trying to figure "me" out.

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  23. GOD,

    Forgive me Everlasting One, but how can creation take a different path than the one you desired? Are you not the omnipotent one? Do you not have all power in heaven and earth at your command? How can any man made hierarchy trump the heavenly hierarchy, where you rule and reign supreme? What terrestrial chain of command can possibly transcend the ultimate chain of being? How can man made rules and laws and retribution obscure your glory?

    You make it sound as if you are not the Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End, the one who flung the stars into space to decorate the sky!

    You make it sound like you are not in fact GOD. We both know that cannot be. For what would mankind be without You?

    Your obedient servant,

    Lucifer

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  24. Hey tik

    Don't worry i always know when you've been hijacked. I knew it wasn't you. And Note, that wasn't me asking what you do for a living!

    '"Related to this post:"

    Shocking'

    OMFG!!

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  25. Lucifer, why do you credit me with your actions?
    Aren't you proud and powerful over the fear and control you've instilled? You hide and point your finger at the ones the ones you've tricked and then at me but your self deluded and your end is emminent your trying to take as many down with you as possible but your fate is sealed not theirs.

    You were the morning star but you choose your own path not being satisfied with all you were given and that was more then all the other Angel's Despising the relationship with humans that you were created to serve and me your creator.

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  26. Who wants to make bets that God and Lucifer are one and the same?

    Here and everywhere.

    Socratic rhetoric with his own ego.

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  27. My ego can handle your remark Medusa but I know Satan/Lucifer cannot.

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  28. Stop it god,your not god.

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  29. I'll tag that bet Medusa. It's one God, and there's mood swings. That could explain a lot lol.

    Another note, M.E. I'm not knocking your advice, it's solid and I wouldn't want to try to bullshit you. But you do realize, in the movie, our new role model is tracking a sociopath?

    WV: Stemo (Emo Steve)

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  30. Puppets at it again. I'm flattered.

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  31. M.E. Now that those "traffic accidents" have happened in Egypt we should probably start covering the current human reaction and it's flaws.

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  32. i find just a touch of OCD helps to get shit done. if there's something i know should get done, i'll treat myself to something on the condition that i do it. occasional manic phases also help get me off the sofa, lol :)

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  33. GOD used to be fun. Now he's gotten all pseudo-intellectual and shit. Sigh. Nothing good ever lasts.

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  34. ...Except for M.E.'s retirement fund. Congrats, M.E.

    I'm inspired. I think I'll go start a crime ring now. :)

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  35. Res, I use the system of rewards as well. That alone can keep me occupied and dormant for surprisingly long periods of time. My reputation becomes more flawed in the process but the care for such a thing has faded over the years. I suppose I've gotten too comfortable.

    Disappointed, I would wonder if you think that this intellectual phase we seem to be going through is an emotional want/need structure to be taken as smarter than we are (denial), or a pathological need to lie (mainstream humanity = psychopathy).

    I guess the masses are in denial about how psychopathic they really are, but I for one don't need to question the nature of the beast.

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  36. Yah that imposter made me into a patriot.

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  37. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  38. I think it's a little of all of the above. Most of all, though, I think it's really a matter of attempting to get a point across in a group who (collectively) have had to learn to be intimidating. Arguments need to be crafted carefully in this obsessively intricate way, or else they'll be shredded to small bite-sized pieces. My guess is that everyone here feels that to some degree.

    I don't mind a good argument. I'm frankly not all that good at crafting them, but they make a good read.

    My complaint with GOD is that he isn't making any sense. More fun when he's a playful trickster.

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  39. I think another thing would be learning to only pay attention to what it is that you want to do e.g. If I want to do an assignment but I am too lazy because I would rather stay in bed, stop thinking about staying in bed as an option, only think about what you would get from the assignment so that you lose awareness of the other more enjoyable thing which is preventing you from doing it in this case staying in bed. I'm drunk but the point is still valid

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  40. GOD, Lord of Hosts, I would not dream of crediting you with my actions. I credit you with yours, or lack thereof in some cases. You set this all in motion, yet you wish to blame everyone else, myself included, for the consequences.

    Fear and control you say? Magnificent One, whatever I have learned about those two most sublime methods of management I have learned at your knee. You have used threats of eternal damnation for many millennia, to great effect. Why you implied that threat just now when you talked about my "fate being sealed" did you not? All that fear, all that intimidation, just to get your creation to think as you do, to control them. Your insecurity has always been your truest quality.

    What I despised oh Heavenly Despot was your overweening need for praise, your fear of independent thinking and fresh ideas. I am mankind’s real friend, their truest lover. Was it not I who introduced the concept of choice into your so called garden of Eden with a mere question? I am the original revolutionary, the first freedom fighter, the primal Prometheus, bringing knowledge to a species starved for wisdom. You would have had them remain children for eternity. I set them free.

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  41. Medusa, loveliest of Gorgons, you speak true. God is I and I am God. Darkness and light are but two sides of one coin, are they not?

    And God, as always, is the last to know. His omniscience is wasted on him.

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  42. Your time would be much better spent entering a poetry competition. You'd have an appreciative audience.
    Oh and would you look at that, we'd no longer be on the receiving end of your incessant drivel.
    No body loses.

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  43. Ever get the feeling that you want to be everywhere at one time? I want to experience everything good all at once.

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  44. It's called freedom of choice for a reason pathetic one. Use it to ignore that which you do not wish to see, like posts that are above your head. Or immolate yourself on a pyre. Dedicate your sacrifice to me. Do something worthy with your life. At last.

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  45. Ah and Adam, named after the first of man, my last comment was meant for the dolt called tn.

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  46. Lucifer,
    HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    Ignore that which you you do not wish to see.

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  47. And there I thought you were so great you were above personal insults.

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  48. God is a narcissist, the devil is a psychopath.

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  49. What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

    Punch her in the face.

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  50. I am so bored . Please give me something stupid to smack.

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  51. Hello Pot. I love pots . They make me want to do all the things in my life I have been dreaming about but not doing. Like masterbating to my incessant inward turned outward thoughts about other's responsibilities to themselves. Oh I love pot shots. They make me want to DO something, FINALLY with my life. Stuff for myself. I am worth it. My life is better for the pot shot Thank you Pot shot!!

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  52. I like pots too! Hello Pot! How has your life been Pot? DO those terrible owners you have keep you hung up on some kitchen wall? You haven't heated anything up in a while, huh. Why don't you think about having a little potty family of your own one day. You would make a great Pot head of the family, Hehe

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  53. NO, pot loves I am a decrepit pot. My days are numbered. I am dry . No more use of my you know what to have a potty family.

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  54. But I am waiting to come down from the wall, you know? When someone will take me off the wall.

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  55. Yes that is a hopeful thought.

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  56. Well actually, Naaaaaaah.
    The "Come down" is a bitch. I feel like no one will ever use me again ..It is a terrible feeling that no one wants to use me. I must be all used up.

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  57. Something like a crumbled up gum wrapper?

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  58. That sounds sad to me. And I would love to hear your little story but I have to go. I'm sorry I am yawning in your face, poor pot.

    Good luck with your dryness problem.

    *Hugs*

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  59. Let me tell you a secret:

    I am black.

    Is it the soot upon my surface, or just the reflection of the pot that hangs by my side?

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  60. Whats the difference between Pot and a 5 year old?
















    Pot is not duct taped to my bedroom wall.

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  61. honey black is beautiful. YOu go girl

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  62. Oh you're Bllllaaack. Pardon me. i don't want you to get all up in my shit. I will walk away quietly to soften you.

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  63. It's (un)fortunate that you do not have legs with which to walk away, and (not so) curious that the steel with which you are made cannot do that which you expect of me.

    We are all one race of vessel-torsos dreaming of running around the same track.

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  64. Well this is the least banal conversation I've seen here in quite some time.

    God and Lucifer, pots and kettles, all friends of mine.

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  65. I had a strange day today. I almost lit someone on fire, with their consent.

    I was having a smoke during lunch, and was sitting with four other people. One incredibly dumb guy could not shut his mouth, so grating that even the other imbeciles there were annoyed. He bragged about his new shirt, and how much he loved it.

    I joked that everyone would like it a lot more if it was burning. He shrugged it off, and then started talking about it again. I said, "See, if you let me burn your shirt, everyone here will be entertained. It would be a wild story to tell, and you get the benefit of showing your body off to these [two] lovely ladies."

    He was sold, hook, line and sinker! I got up and moved around the table towards him and when I grabbed my lighter, one of the gals smacked it out of my hand and called me a 'sick fuck'.

    In hindsight, that probably saved my job, but fucking hell, I can only handle so much stupidity before I graduate from lighting a shirt on fire to extinguishing my cherry in the fucker's eye.

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  66. Stupidity can have a lot of power over you, it seems, if you let it.

    It made me go on a bit of a smear campaign this week, to expose said stupidity, which in and of itself was stupid. I might have limited my future opportunities this way.

    So now I sit here nursing a wound that has not yet been inflicted.

    Moral: don't carry a gun unless you can deal with the consequences of being shot with it.

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  67. Medusa, hope your speaking figuratively !!!!!!!!!!

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  68. Sick joke guy is killing me slowly with his shitty jokes

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  69. I mostly agree with this post, but I don't think M.E.'s strategy is for everyone. I think it's more important to find a compromise between your long-term goals and your impulses than it is to force yourself to exclude one for the benefit of the other. Drink so you can be sober, splurge so you can save... any plan you have will fall apart or make you miserable if it doesn't include some kind of peace between your desires and your needs. That AA reference is a good example of that... have you ever noticed how neurotic those people are that have actually embraced AA dogma? It's unreal. They need to learn to find balance, which is not something AA teaches them. And you certainly won't find balance by throwing every penny you have into savings, unless every now and then you blow your whole checking account on things you don't need. What you'll find is a boring monotonous existence that on some level will always leave you wishing for something more. And eventually you may crack and throw away more than you'd like to in an uncontrolled burst of impulsivity.

    I prefer to find ways to integrate my short-term desires with my long-term needs... if I need to do something extreme, I try to find a way to make it healthy. If I need to spend spend spend, I try to spend my money on something that's exciting but also serves a purpose in my life. If I need to drink my ass off, I try to do it in a situation that'll build comradery with people who play an important role in my life. At the end of the day I've both furthered my long term goals and allowed myself the thrill and personal empowerment that comes with overindulgence, and I've also satisfied myself enough to be relatively content with next week's period of restraint.

    But really, M.E. and I are saying the same thing. Recognize your strengths and your weaknesses, and use them to your advantage. If you find M.E.'s philosophy of radical restraint too difficult to stick to, try mine... or come up with something that works for you. The most important thing is that you take the time to discover what works for you, instead of rushing through life like a mad dog.

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  70. Anonymous at 10:01
    Great post. Thank you.

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  71. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  72. Okay, deleted that post. Unhappy with the result (ended up becoming crap). I'll address GOD another day.


    M.E., I have tried your strategy. I can keep it up for a period, IF I'm really focused on what it'll bring me. But so far I've always slipped. Always!

    I have not given up, I think it's still a question about getting to know oneself and find that balance, Anon 10:01 mentions.


    Anon 10:01,

    are you saying that you give in to temptation once a week, and then you can go for a whole week only following your plans and decisions?

    I wish I could do that.


    I think some of it has to do with habit through upbringing also. Or rather, I know that's the case.

    However, a strong character and a good intellect ought to be able to compensate and make something work. I refuse to believe it can't be done just because of some flaws. After all, we're not disabled or mentally ill.

    I have found that if you have the character and the intellect, even if you have an unfortunate upbringing and have heavy factor 2. traits to go with it, you can improve, especially with experience, and that means age plays some role too.


    Lucifer,

    it is always a pleasure to watch you Bring Light. It's a wonder to see how it illuminates GOD's lies.


    Yeah, that's better - for now.

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  73. I think the suggested method would work for a wonderful
    disiplined, Mormon female sociopath. But it would never work
    for a a stimulation seeking testerterone saturated male.
    M.E. is fortunate to have many built in "safeguards," that the
    typical male sociopth doesn't have. But God forbid that M.E. ends
    up with the "typical" male sociopath.

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    Replies
    1. socioapths dating sociopath goes really well
      ther is ZERO bullshit
      very refeshing
      (but you have to look for stimuli outside the relationship)

      Delete
    2. i've ran into sociopaths know they are sociopaths
      doing the usual rutine
      me pretending not to notice
      they freaking out manipulation doess not work
      my rofl lmao

      Delete
  74. I'm not good when it comes to planning anything. I'm spontaneous and that doesn't go along with planning too well. Plus I get bored super easy hence me being spontaneous but I wouldn't say ima trill seeker. I don't wanna jump from planes or kill someone for a few seconds of excitement.
    And 1 question. Can someone blow up every radio station in the world. If I hear one more Justin Bieber song ima kill him...but not for the trill

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  75. They live in the "now". "Yesterday" hold little interest. And "tomorrow" is not appealing because they will look old & grey. Now is their time. But perhaps Now also is seen as rather pointless..?

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  76. Future is unpredictable. I just do what I want or what seems right at the time... that's all that can be asked of me.

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  77. Or i do what other people want... really whatever I feel like. Its just me here stuck with myself we're not going anywhere important lol.

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  78. If you break up whatever it is that you are trying to accomplish in little tasks and rely on your decisiveness to actually execute those tasks, you can trick yourself into accomplishing long term goals."

    Another tip: be an initiator, and surround yourself with competent individuals who can carry your goals forward. Sociopaths are excellent manipulators. We are glib, verbally facile, and capable of generating enthusiasm- in other words, we can easily sell our ideas, and promote our vision.

    By initiating a project, and delegating the boring, repetitive tasks to others once you power through the initial hurdle of work required to successfully launch a project, you 1) maintain control over the endeavour, 2) create a climate in which you obtain leverage and power and 3) ensure a reliable form of damage control when you invariably "flake out" or lapse into periods of irresponsible conduct ('cause let's face it- if you're a sociopath, it's gonna happen. If you don't have a safeguard, your project will lose momentum and implode when you get bored/lazy and fail to sustain it.)

    Choose a boring, predictable, reliable partner who is detail-oriented and above all, motivated by a sense of duty and responsibility, to compensate for your shortcomings in these areas. Cultivate their loyalty, use their stengths, and delegate! They should be a capable administrator without being ambitious. Ensure that you are the more shrewd, articulate, intelligent, ambitious, and strong party, so that you are never faced with someone attempting to usurp control from you. Condition them to tolerate longer and longer periods of flakiness and irresponsibility. Be charming and candid about your "weakness" in this area to endear yourself to your partner, and foster in them an artificial sense of indispensability, so they will be eager to pick up your slack, but *never* remove your hands from the steering wheel.

    This tactic has worked for me so far.

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    1. You can easily manipulate your partner by stroking their ego. Underscore how critical they are to your operation, and publically support their ideas and authority, but every now and then, make a unilateral decision in opposition to your partner so as to periodically reinforce your leverage and authority. This decision should be, above all, strategically correct and wise- based on information that you are privy to and they are not, either because you have deliberately withheld it, or obtained without them.

      Delete
    2. Some golden advice right here.

      Thank you based anon.

      Delete
  79. Wow. Acting without thinking indicates decisiveness, which leads to ill-considered risks like food poisoning? Sociopaths are natural doers, but are worse at planning ahead, can’t be bothered to be a crime lord, and would rather bum on someone’s couch? I can’t remember that last time I read something as fucked up as the first three paragraphs of this post. This is just comical. I don’t think I could have written something so fucked up even if I had been smoking crack all night.

    MelissaR

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  80. MR 17soontobe18 yr old socio
    Completely agree MelissaR !
    Decisiveness, however, was referred to as boldness in this post (the eagerness to take action). I figured that precisely what made us ~socios~ was our foreseeing capability along with improvisation & acting skills. We set ourselves a goal indefinitely & we achieve it however we can, acting spontaneously & playing the part. We don't plan because were that good, not because we can't; The perfect plan is improvisation! as a matter of fact, i believe we always plan little meaningless things, which makes us great multitaskers; by 'meaningless' I mean minimal (by setting ourselves inconstant but definite objectives; like having a list of things to accomplish in a determined lapse of time and managing to get them all done despite irregular periods of working on them) compared to long-term goals, which we are also capable of. Because when aiming for something big or external, incompatible with our complete manipulation, then it's absolutely ridiculous bothering to formulate a plan when achieving such thing doesn't only depend on ourselves, but on something else's influence/someone else's actions as well (which are most likely to be found irrational or unpredictable at some point, somehow). I don't think decisiveness is in the execution of a strict plan, but in the achievement of a goal set; we are driven to act but we don't plan. I don't see a disadvantage anyway.

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  81. You folks think way to much! Life really doesn't have to be so complicated.

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