a(nother) reason that sociopaths may like to be around people, have friends, be in relationships, etc.:Rejection resonates with a primal threat, one the brain seems designed to highlight. [I]n human prehistory being part of a band was essential for survival; exclusion could be a death sentence, as is still true today for infant mammals in the wild. The pain center [that triggers actual physical pain at real or impending social isolation] may have evolved this sensitivity to social exclusion as an alarm signal to warn of poetntial banishment--and presumably to prompt us to repair the threatened relationship.also from "social intelligence." interesting because i can feel severe anxiety at the prospect of a break up, resulting in nausea, headaches, and other intense physical pain. a relative of mine (also sociopath) gets the same -- always in the toilet vomiting when his girlfriend threatens to leave him. i don't know whether all socios are that way, but i imagine that they at least find isolation or abandonment to be unpleasant.
When our need for closeness goes unmet, emotional disorders can result. . . . Social rejection--or fearing it--is one of the most common causes of anxiety. Feelings of inclusion depend not so much on having frequent social contacts or numerous relationships as on how accepted we feel, even in just a few key relationships.
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If you want to talk about fear of not being a member of The Group, you're not talking about "sociopaths."
You keep talking about "sociopaths" as if they are the pathological cases. Yawn.
-Vigilius
This is something I've experienced as well. Horrible physical nausea at a prospective breakup or comparable rejection. Interestingly, however, when I'm dumped (or dump someone), I lose interest in them quickly, which is one of a few things that suggest to me that what we as sociopaths feel as love is not really the same thing that most people feel.
I LOATHE the thought of rejection but am always the dump-er or abandoner when I just don't want them anymore. Should they not take the rejection rough enough or not agree to be my friend (AKA perpetually-pining emotional fodder that I never really stop seducing and ruin for any future significant others) I get angry/upset/feel sick and then go to the trouble of winning them over and re-breaking them.
I actually prefer being single and alone, with a bunch of ambiguous friendship/romantic relationships and terminate a relationship after a few months should some poor guy manage to snag me in some kind of commitment.
What is wrong with me then?? lol, rejection to me is a natural end to a process. I almost anticipate it. Then feel "normal" when its done and dusted. I enjoy being alone for long periods of time, picking and choosing when i want to engage with others. Loneliness has become like a close friend. I tell anybody who is interested in me that this will come to an end, so don't expect too much from me. I prefer lonliness to long term relationships....im just plain mad. Theres no place where i belong lmao.
I'm not sure if I'm really a sociopath but I've done some pretty heartless things, all of which are legal though. I don't feel a wide array of emotions and I don't feel emotional pain in moments were other people would. But when I'm dumped! It's like my world temporarily unfolds! I puke and feel anxiety and severe pain. But the reason for my extreme pain is because I lost control of the other person. How dare them leave me. How dare them serve someone else. How dare them choose to live without me. I get extremely angry at them for choosing to be independent of me that I tend to cross boundaries. But I never do anything illegal because I don't want to go to jail. But the funny thing is i would rather they die of cancer and perhaps not feel as much pain than them break up with me.
Sociapaths would not come here to express their feelings...clearly because they do not have any. I've been married to one for 8 years now and he only expresses his feelings when he wants something in return. Call me crazy because i actually love this creep; however it is a love/hate.
Relationships just ended up being plain inconvenient for me.
I was always a total dick to partners (although they rarely found out) - but when some bad stuff outside my control happened to a girl I was with (and loved - the way some of us do) I couldn't help her. Didn't have the tools or the motivation.
If I go to heaven it'll be for remaining single.
"Sociapaths would not come here to express their feelings...clearly because they do not have any"
Learn to spell.
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