Saturday, April 10, 2010
Friday, April 9, 2010
Portait of a sociopath -- Paul Harvey style
An anonymous reader writes:
Lisa Druck was born the daughter of a rich insurance lawyer. When she was a teenager, her father bought her a $150,000 show horse named Henry the Hawk. Lisa and Henry won a number equestrian jumping prizes together, but when a recession came along, Lisa's rich father was temporarily short on cash and decided to sell Henry.
Because of the recession, the best offer for Henry was $125,000, even though the horse had been purchased and insured for $150,000. Lisa's father decided that the best way to get the extra $25,000 would be to arrange an accident for the horse. So he hired and trained a man to electrocute Henry. The man Lisa's father hired went on to become a serial killer of horses, and years later an informant for the FBI in the ‘horse murders‘ insurance scandal.
Lisa stopped riding horses entirely after Henry was killed. She left home at 18 and went to school in New York City, but dropped out after two years. Lisa dated brat pack novelist Jay McInerney who wrote a Roman à clef called "Story of my Life" about `Alison Poole` "an ostensibly jaded, cocaine-addled, sexually voracious 20-year old", who moved to New York City after her father killed her horse for insurance money. It would be years before anyone tried to figure out who `Alison Poole` was, because the horse murders scandal hadn't broken yet.
Alison Poole appeared in some of Jay McInerney's other novels. She also appeared in novels by Jay's friend, Bret Easton Ellis. She's in the novel "American Psycho", and even makes it into the film adaptation where someone mentions seeing Patrick Bateman and Alison Poole together at the Kentucky Derby.
The real Alison Poole, Lisa Druck married a high power lawyer in 1991, changed her name in 1994, and divorced in 2000. What's she up to these days? You may know her as Rielle Hunter, mistress of Jonathan Edwards the insurance lawyer turned presidential candidate who's been in the news for getting her pregnant while his wife had cancer, and then paying off a top staffer help cover it up.
And now you know, the rest of the story.
Paul Harvey
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Defining conscience
I've been thinking recently about the definition and imagery behind the concept "conscience." Martha Stout in The Sociopath Next Door defines conscience as necessarily having an emotional component:
Psychologically speaking, conscience is a sense of obligation ultimately based in an emotional attachment to another living creature (often but not always a human being), or to a group of human beings, or even in some cases to humanity as a whole. Conscience does not exist without an emotional bond to someone or something, and in this way conscience is closely allied with the spectrum of emotions we call "love." This alliance is what gives true conscience its resilience and its astonishing authority over those who have it, and probably also its confusing and frustrating quality.I don't know if I agree with that definition, but maybe my opinion doesn't count for much. I do find it interesting that there are basically two types of imagery used to portray conscience: (1) the devil and the angel on the shoulder and (2) a separate entity telling you to do the right thing, e.g. Jiminy Cricket. The origin of the devil and angel is obvious -- Judeo Christian beliefs include the concept of the "holy spirit" and guardian angels, and even God telling you what to do, and there is also a fallen angel, the devil, tempting you to do wrong things. The origin of Jiminy is less clear, but I would imagine that most non religious people would associate their conscience with this type instead of the angel/devil. When I asked my friend which he thought was most accurate, he said:
Friend: Jiminy CricketIs a conscience like other organs in our body? We never notice it until we hurt it? And if so, is it more like the heart? The lungs? Or the appendix? The gall bladder? Is it something else? If we're defining sociopaths based partially on a lack of conscience (e.g. Robert Hare's book, Without Conscience), what is it that other people have that sociopaths lack?
M.E.: Yeah, interesting. So it is a separate person? eparate little part of you?
Friend: I don't know, you can "tap into" your conscience, or suspend it, push it aside...
M.E.: So sort of separate, right?
Friend: I guess so, right?
M.E.: Hard to know. I guess it has to feel separate from us, otherwise we wouldn't come up with a separate name for him.
Friend: I feel like it doesn't feel separate most of the time until you feel fractured about it, when something disturbs it.
M.E.: Like a bone or your kidney?
Friend: Yeah, exactly.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Survival of the fittest
A sociopath talks about teaching children empathy and growing up.
I went to catholic grade school. I remember being "taught" do unto others as you would have done unto you. I remember thinking I get it but what's that mean? When I was maybe 23, 24? I remember hearing the word empathy, or empathetic fools or something like that in a nirvana song and saying to myself hmmm, what's that mean? I looked it up. After further research I came along a short story on how to teach preschoolers empathy and so I began doing so with my daughter. But I also remember thinking damnit! Why didn't anyone teach me this when I was in grade school, could I have been different? It was nice to learn what the golden rule real REALLY means, to this day I can't say I believe or practice it (lol) I treat people close to me very good, I treat people I may need something from with my chraming gift giving self, I treat people I could careless about like just that, and the people close to me can see the quick switch flip, they say oh I see "you" coming oh no... They say the transition in persona's takes 2 mild agitations and I switch. Let's say like the incredible hulk, only cooler, and more able to communicate clearly. Because I then become brutally honest, far from charming, and very demanding. Its almost a shame. Its a decent skill, it should be valued.
[On the application of the law of the jungle or everyone is equal] I can't say I enjoyed here's your turn now... I became resentful of those terms almost like people should earn their places. When I was in gym class I was often picked by the teacher to be a captain then being able to choose my teammates, the teachers picked me because they saw me as a good sport who always picked the lousy players first so they didn't feel left out. And I would pick the crappiest volley players first, the shy awkward unpopular kids, but not to make them "feel" good... I did it for several reasons... 1st reason: dorky kids, bad at sports probably smart, I could probably use an ally in my AP chem class or in case I found myself in a situation where having these ppl like me may be good (ace in my back pocket) cheating on a test copying homework etc... 2nd reason: the teachers LOVED the idea that I gave the overlooked kids a centerstage feeling even if just for 5 minutes during gym class. So I liked that it made me look good to the teachers, who then viewed me as mature and reasonable, SO if I needed to be a few minutes late I wouldn't get written up or they'd let me slide on dress code etc... 3rd reason: this is probably my favorite, most pleasurable at least to me... To see the frustration on the other teams girls faces. They'd arm their team with the best players high fiving each other and playing so serious and they'd get so frustrated with how poorly our team was as an opponent. They'd actually get angry. And I'd say aw good job you'll get the serve over the net this time cmon try again, while those girls opposite us groaned and sighed because they wanted to play and win... I loved the angry looks on their faces, screw them, who cares about high school gym... I'll tell u who did, my awkward unpopular teammates because for 5 mins they were special, who made them feel special? Me.
The means for "teaching"(because really its society saying this is how you SHOULD behave feel etc) empathy in brief goes as follows... Two small children around your age(in order to teach the lesson its tailored to the pupils age) are riding bikes in the street in front of their home. The first child loses control and goes in the path of a car that slams on the breaks in a panic. Tires screech! The small child lays in the street, his bike wheel bent, the pedal broken off. When the second child runs up to his friend after the dust clears he sees his friend scraped from the road, blood coming from his scratches NOW u child imagine yourself laying on the road and feel the pain of the scratches and scrapes, and feel the throbbing headache and the burning blood coming from your cuts... Imagine how upset you would be if that was you laying in the street, feeling all that pain and having a ruined bike...suffering. NOW that's how u know how someone feels in a situation... So the question you have to ask yourself is "HOW" would you like your friends to react to your injuries, and your family to aid you with repairing your bike, and the ppl to help you off the street. That's how to understand how to do unto others as you would unto you... In a sense empathy, imagine yourself in that situation and how would you feel and want people to react to you, that's how you know how to behave... Or some nice crap like that... It makes sense if you take it back to childhood we can all remember and imagine pain, so its easy to relate to the hurt child... for me its just react as society wants me to, or how I want to? A personal dilemma... Truly, depends on the kid! If its a kid I like guess I'd give him a hand, however if its say my friends daughter who is 11 and just fowl mouthed and disrespectful to her mother would I help her no, I'd probably look at the car to see if she damaged the car... That's about it... Funny thing is I'm ok with not having any feelings if I were to witness something like that... I'd probably see it more as a traffic issue than much else, and Really who cares?
Incredible hulk, perhaps we(socios) all have him inside of us...I'm fine with mine.
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