From a reader:
HI I'm getting out or a least trying to get out of a relationship with a sociopath. I'm devastated and in so much pain. doing some research i found out your bog that i find very interesting.My response:
My question today is, do you feel pain? are sociopaths understand the pain that inflict on the people the say they love? because reading you and looking for information, i would have to think that he of course doesn't love me or care about me. Does a sociopath cares about anything? does he ever feel sad?
I'm so in love with this guy but it has been a year long painful relationship i cant do this to myself anymore. Do you think he gets what he has done to me?
We feel pain, but over different types of things, which doesn't necessarily guarantee that your sociopath is currently feeling pain. But he said he loved you, and if you feel like he had no reason to lie, he was probably telling the truth -- whatever "love" might mean to him. This is all assuming he is a sociopath, which unless he has admitted to being a sociopath, he very well may not be.(cont.)
I've mentioned this before, but in love relationships, if sociopaths are truly committed/invested in the relationship (i.e. not just seducing, ruining, or gaming), they are very childlike. They love seflishly like a child, they can by petty like a child, they are emotionally superficial like a child, they are self-centered like a child. They are very focused on having their own needs met, and they are quick to forget you. What do people always say when children's parents die? That it is sad, but luckily they are young and they'll get over it quickly. Sociopaths can be extremely disappointed at the end of a relationship for lots of reasons -- feelings of failure, loneliness, and loss (not necessarily upset at losing you or your love, but losing at least whatever happiness you brought him, whatever role you filled). They are also easily assuaged, quick to move on.