Friday, October 24, 2008

Sociopath haters = witch hunting freaks

I troll the internet for sociopath stuff all the time. I look for others like me, but also enjoy reading what others have to say about sociopaths. For instance in this post titled, "Do sociopaths/psychopaths effect our economy in a negative way?":
Hey Obama, hey McCain! Why wasn’t this in your debate? This is an important issue that needs to be addressed. Sociopaths play a huge part in the degredation of our economy. Our financial downfall is effected daily by these diabolical leeches. Most of them do not work, and suck the life out of those around them who do, until nothing is left. They cause bankruptcy in their closest benefactors, and cause economic decay as a whole.
And in a comment for the post:
"In terms of a scientific study, it seems we are on our own. The spread of knowledge of sociopathy has apparently got to be bottom up. The engine driving this spread of knowledge are the experiences of every day people. Keep up the good work."
Wow, way to come across as a crazy person. Can you imagine either Obama or McCain talking about sociopaths in a debate? Or any other forum? Ha, that would seem so ridiculous. And this other guy's suggestion that there be a grassroots effort to spread the word about sociopaths? The image that is conjured up in my mind is the wife from Witches of Eastwick, the movie. She's always like, "they're witches!" -- but she acts so crazy that no one believes her.

Good work sociopaths for staying so underground that we'll never be a major issue in any political debate! If any grassroots campaign got started regarding sociopaths, it would be pro sociopath. What is that Baudelaire/Usual Suspects quote? "The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."

Cartoon by Hugh Macleod/ Gapingvoid.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Diagnosing a sociopath in Private Practice

I don't generally watch this show, but my friend gave me a heads up that there was a sociopath featured on Wednesday night's episode of Private Practice. A patient shows up at the psychiatrist, saying, "I'm afraid of my son, I think he's a sociopath, he killed our dog... he doesn't react, he doesn't cry, he just has this cold hard stare..."

First of all, that emo kid is a poser. There is a difference between cries-for-help fake creepiness and the truly soulless.

The most hilariously inaccurate line was "Do you know how rare a true sociopath is?" Ha, actually I do know how rare, or should I say, how common...

My favorite line: [terrified] "He's smart! Do you think he's not going to figure this out?!"

Anyway, the doctor goes to the school to talk with the kid's teachers and the kid is there waiting for her with a baseball bat. "You made my mom cry, what did you tell her?!" Ah, turns out the kid is not a sociopath after all. yes he killed the dog, but it was because the dog had cancer and he wanted to save his mother the money treating the dog. That sounds reasonable, killing animals to save money. Hmm... actually, he could still be a sociopath. And you know what? That's okay.

Can moral compasses lead you astray?

This conversation is why I will never understand people with moral compasses. You try to follow this logic:

Friend: in your post about the intern . . . "seeing the look on intern's face when the realization hit that the secret had been unnecessarily disclosed"? Why did the intern disclose that she was dating a coworker? Because she thought you would guard the secret? And you were her friend?

M.E.: Ha, no, she thought that I knew already. I flushed her out, she thought she got caught.

Friend: Oh I see. Will you tell her gay lover? I think you should.

M.E.
: You think I should?! Why?

Friend
: You should tell her because she is with a crazy girl who sleeps around all the time.

M.E.
: Interesting. Is that the moral thing to do? Or should I keep people's secrets?

Friend
: I think you should tell. If I ever had such evidence of an affair I would seek out the
other party. I might do so anonymously, but I would at least alert them to it, and try to provide as much evidence as possible. I mean, at least once she has the info she can decide how she will take it, maybe they have an open relationship. And if ever someone tells you something like that again, tell them, either you can tell your lover or I will. I would expect the same. Can you imagine me standing by knowing someone was cheating on you?

M.E.
: Well, no, because you have more loyalty to me than the other person.

Friend
: I would tell on you. No, i would tell you "You can tell ___, or I will, but it isn't fair for them not to know."

M.E.
: You would rat me out?

Friend
: Do you feel betrayed by that? Are you going to tell the girlfriend?

M.E
.: No, because I don't really know for sure. And they weren't dating at the time, I don't think... so it seems like it makes less sense to tell.

Friend
: I see, fooling yourself.

M.E.
: Fooling myself?

Friend
: Why would she confess if she did no wrong?

M.E.
: Oh, you're saying I should force her to confess?

Friend
: No. I suppose if she wasn't clearly dating at that time, it might be hazy. But I bet the girlfriend doesn't know.

M.E.
: Yeah, I bet the girlfriend doesn't know either. That's why I have power over her. Over them both, really.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Why I like being a sociopath

There are a lot of reasons why it is frustrating and very lonely to be a sociopath, but there are good parts, too. My favorite part about being a sociopath is the mind games. For the past several years I have been domesticated: trying to stay on the up and up, trying not only to pass but to do the "right thing." But I still love *love* to indulge in a brilliant mind game every once in a while. There is something so oddly satisfying in seeing someone giving up their volition to you. I'm especially proud of my most recent conquest, particularly since it involves vindication.

The worst thing you can do as a sociopath is fall asleep on the job. This happened to me last summer at work. There was an intern who was energetic and naive. I thought nothing of my interactions with intern until I learned that intern was having a steamy affair with an opposite sex member of the staff, even though intern professed to be gay and in a relationship. I was intrigued, but more than that, my ego was hurt that I had not recognized intern for being a con-artist. I started wondering to what extent I had already been conned. I tried to set my own traps, but ended up always losing--including losing very badly in a poker game one memorable night.

Flash forward to the present: intern back, sociopath in action. This time I put intern on the defensive right away: thrust parry, hidden insults, criticisms disguised as well meaning advice, flattery, insinuations, retreat. I know how to breed dis-ease. I keep at this for weeks until finally I get an unexpected and so-satisfying consequence: the intern confesses to being in a secret relationship with another co-worker. Applause applause. But the best moment was when instead of giving her a smug face of satisfaction (beginner's mistake), I showed shock with just a hint of scandalization and embarrassment, which of course made the intern even more embarrassed and nonplussed. Seeing the look on intern's face when the realization hit that the secret had been unnecessarily disclosed? Priceless. And I still have the info about the previous affair! Which means I will continue to reap what I have sown here.

It was a good day to be a sociopath.

Sociopaths in the news

On actress Anne Hathaway's ex, Italian businessman Raffaello Follieri:
When I advise women and men about how to avoid someone with sociopathic tendencies, I tell them don't expect a monster; instead expect someone oozing with charm. Yet, underneath the heat and charisma are cold thoughts and actions devoid of empathy. Impulsivity, thrill-seeking, and constant boredom are characteristic.
Relationships are used as stepping stones to get them where they want to go. They have an uncanny ability to push someone to the brink, but then suck them back into the relationship again. It's drama, and they love it.

But cads are not infallible. There are always signs. That's why it's so important to educate men and women to see the signs, as well as helping them achieve the courage and willingness it takes to interpret them.
I'm not sure exactly what the signs would be, possibly claiming a personal relationship with the Pope?
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