Comments on Sociopath World: Seeing through a glass darkly

I see being able to adapt as a part of my life. Bu...

2009-12-21T05:22:41.366-08:00

I see being able to adapt as a part of my life. But changing certain intrinistic character details is impossible. They are just etched into me forever. Yes I can mold myself to be what I need to be at any moment. But no I cannot and will not change what was and always has been a part of me. I accept that I am self centered, not something I see as negative. Change comes when I need it to for whatever reason my suit me at that moment. The reality is though when the time passes whether I hide who I am or not, I am not the person I pretend to be. I will not accept myself as flawed. Anyone who sees themselves in a negative light is foolish and allows others to take advantage of that very weakness. I don't know if this will even make sense to everyone but that's my opinion on the topic being discussed

Good O' Saint Birdrick—patron saint of rationa...

2009-12-21T04:50:55.624-08:00

Good O' Saint Birdrick—patron saint of rational assessment and emotional removal.

The following is a prayer I imagine the naive might whisper…

“O blessed it be thy complications of common sense, forgive those who do not see beyond their selves and cherish those who are in tune. Remind those who stray far from the path of sense and reward those who walk it everyday, but do not reward those who walk it for selfish reasons, as one day they will all fucking pay! In the name of schizophrenia, the concussion, and the holy tumor that presses against the spongy substance that cause impulse…amen.”

That comment was a prime example of why I respect Daniel's opinion, no matter how cold hearted he comes off as.

2009-12-21T04:49:07.995-08:00

This comment has been removed by the author.

Dear Foolish: You threw away any credibility you ...

2009-12-20T20:33:52.088-08:00

Dear Foolish:

You threw away any credibility you may have had when you said this: “I think that anyone has the ability to be anything even the homosexual becoming straight.” Humans are adaptable, but not that adaptable. The truth is, we really can’t be whatever we want to be. I know, I know. That goes against everything “Can Do Americans” and other irrationally optimistic types believe in, but the idea that people can permanently change themselves at the level of thought/emotion/instinct is a myth, along with other such popular fairytales like justice and equality. The social anxiety you refer to is not the same thing as the innate personality traits that one is born with. The former is the kind of thing people sometimes pick up along the road of life as a means of responding to particularly stressful stimuli; the latter is something you’re born with. One is temporary, the other continuous. You can indeed choose to stop using a specific neurotic behavior pattern, but you can’t choose to drop a personality trait. Do a quick Google of “personality traits” and “The Five Factor Model” for more information.

As for the other comment about the “amazing goodness” that can be found on the “other side”… Look, there are two points. First, I don’t doubt that some people do indeed experience loads of wonderful emotions helping people. Notice I highlighted some because that’s the part you don’t seem to grasp. Finding satisfaction in this life has to be an individual thing, meaning we all have to find it in our own way. Just because helping others might make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside doesn’t mean that’s true for everyone else, let alone moi. It does not ring true to me that I would “tremendously gain more” by helping others. That’s just not how I’m wired. Second, you present a false dichotomy. It’s not a choice between helping others or using them. As your comment implies, you help others because you gain, not in spite of it. Your gain takes the form of warm fuzzies, or emotional uplift, or being able to pat yourself on the back for being a "good person". I could even theorize that people like you may need other people to suffer in order to be able to help them, so that you in turn can feel good. After all, who would Mother Teresa have been without her poor and leprous Indians? So in a sense, you might say that the altruistic use the targets of their charity as much as a sociopath uses the targets of his manipulations. Both parties seek their own gain, only one is socially sanctioned and approved of and the other officially frowned upon.

See what I mean? It’s complicated. You sound awfully naïve and/or ill informed. Don't take that as an insult. It's merely an observation. Here’s hoping you expand both your knowledge base and intellectual horizons in the months and years to come! Cheers and happy holidays!

Daniel Birdick, I think that you have helped me to...

2009-12-20T18:06:55.728-08:00

Daniel Birdick, I think that you have helped me to understand the sociopaths point of view on it but what you people cannot seem to grasp for some reason is that sometimes we work hard to change a behavior and it benefits not only ourselves but others. I wish you would see that there really is something amazingly good to be gained on the other side. Does it not ring true to you that you could help others and gain from it tremendously more than you ever could expending so much energy in trying to use and manipulate people? I don't get the thought process because it doesn't make sense. When I had social anxiety I had a whole list of ideas and behaviors which I thought were instinct and set in stone. They can always change when you challenge yourself and change the pattern that you have programmed in your mind to act out. Maybe the sociopath just does not have the comprehension or the focus control to challenge themselves in that way easily. And not only do I believe that if I truly wanted to I could do evil but that I could destroy my conscience and become the sociopath if I put my mind to it. I think that anyone has the ability to be anything even the homosexual becoming straight. Humans are very adaptable. We get use to our patterns but if we are forced into a certain sitation we will find out how not set in stone some of those "instincts" are.

First, overall good post ME. Nicely done, for the...

2009-12-19T21:13:18.950-08:00

First, overall good post ME. Nicely done, for the most part.

j, get over yourself. I keep trying to figure out why on earth anyone should try really hard to be anything other than who/what they are. Even if a guy’s behavior modification is successful there are indeed some traits that aren’t going anywhere. Homosexuals are a perfect example of this. Sure, sure, a guy can stop having sex with other guys, and sure, sure, he can get married to a woman, but that doesn’t mean his natural sexual attraction to those of the same gender has gone away. Likewise, there are certain personality traits that, barring major brain damage, aren’t likely to be altered, no matter how much you modify your behavior. Reality sucks that way sometimes, doesn’t it?

Fool, you’re comparing apples to oranges. In your comment, you say that you know that you can train yourself to harm others even though it’s against your nature, so you wonder why so called sociopaths can’t train themselves to think of others first. Your example compares your behavior with the sociopaths instinctive thought processes. Do you see the difference? Of course behavior can be modified, but innate patterns of thought that stem from genetically inherited traits are not themselves likely to be drastically changed. In other words, ditto from the above paragraph. Personality traits may or may not be set in stone, but that doesn’t mean they are written on water either. As far as your pity for the "sad" fate of sociopaths, well you said it yourself: your opinion is based on what you've seen. You should get out more. It'll expand your horizons. There is more than one way to be ok in this life.

To Sobriquet, I understand that this is what is un...

2009-12-19T19:34:43.508-08:00

To Sobriquet, I understand that this is what is understood about sociopaths that they will only do things in their own interest and not for the better of others unless it suits them in some way. My problem is that I cannot believe that it is set in stone. I mean I don't see why it is against my nature to hurt someone or act like a sociopath yet I know that if I put my mind to think only of myself I could train myself to do it. So why can't a sociopath train themselves to think of others without it being so black and white? From what I have seen of the sociopaths I know it looks like they lead completely miserable, paranoid, failing lives which have resulted from their own greed and self serving. It's quite sad.

If and when a sociopath wants to change their self...

2009-12-18T08:09:10.139-08:00

If and when a sociopath wants to change their self, it isn't for the better of others but strictly a selfish move, done for THEIR interest in self preservation. The benefit to all those around them is a bonus, which can be manipulated if they find it in their best interest. Though, that of course might contradict their initial move to improve themselves.

I appreciate the author because you recognize what...

2009-12-17T23:03:03.096-08:00

I appreciate the author because you recognize what you are and you work on it. I don't believe all this bull that sociopaths can't change, it's the fact that they don't want to change which is the problem. I grew up having severe social anxiety, I am very heavily swayed by fear. I didn't give up. There were many times when I heard "this is genetic" "you have to take meds to overcome it". I refused to believe that. The best solution for me was addressing it through behavior modification. It wasn't easy but I have made tremendous strides. To me nothing is set in stone that anyone has to be any way. If a sociopath really decides like you have to discover who they are and look at all aspects of their inner self and then apply themselves in changes I have no doubt that they could do it and feel rewarded for it. That is if they can look beyond their ego and sense of senfishness and grandness to view a different perspective and change your reality for the better of yourself and others. I think that sociopaths are very short sighted in that they think that they have to use people in order to be happy and gain things.

so ME, i am sorry i can't seem to get past thi...

2009-12-17T17:26:39.037-08:00

so ME, i am sorry i can't seem to get past this, but, ARE there different degrees of sociopathy in your opinion? because this last post seems to have been written by a perfectly well adjusted person. that is not to say you couldnt be a danger to society, but we all have that underlying potential.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portia_%28genus%29

2009-12-17T15:39:03.143-08:00

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portia_%28genus%29

If you take a solipsistic approach, which I do, th...

2009-12-17T06:36:31.850-08:00

If you take a solipsistic approach, which I do, then no. Other people do not exist. One cannot even be certain that existence is a plausible thing.

Other people exist?

2009-12-16T18:24:29.487-08:00

Other people exist?